Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1219.

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The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 1219
by Angharad

Copyright © 2010 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
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My head was reeling from tiredness and my conversations with Stephanie. I waited outside the school and received a text from Simon.

’Lock up the Merc. J is not to have it until we decide. Si x.’

I replied: ’Alredy did. C x’

And received a response: ‘Clever clogs.’

Four schoolgirls appeared who knocked on the door of the car. “What’s the password?” I asked. From the slightly open window.

“Password–? Eh–?” said Trish.

“Yes, password.”

“There isn’t one,” she replied.

“Wrong–that’s your guess gone.”

“Hey, that’s not fair.”

“You don’t get two goes–who’s next?”

“Mummy, open the door,” offered Billie.

“No, next?”

“Open sesame?” tried Livvie, at least she was thinking.

“Hard luck. Meems?”

“Pweese, Mummy.”

“Correct. In you get.” I unlocked the doors and Meems and the others scrambled in.

“That was most unfair,” sulked Trish.

“Expecting you to say, please–yes perhaps you’re right.”

I heard Mima smirking in the back. “I got it wight,” she was chanting.

Trish was itching to tell her that she was lucky or stupid or something equally derogatory when she thought better of it, engaging her brain before her mouth.

“As children you have certain expectations of parents–things of the nature of love, protection, food, clothing, shelter and so on. However, as parents we expect certain things from you as children, such as love, respect, obedience and some politeness. It costs nothing to be courteous and polite but it might save your life, and certainly some money and time. People are more responsive to those who show some respect to them and are polite and courteous.”

“Wossat mean, Mummy?” asked Meems.

“It means saying please and thank you and meaning it. Having patience for others. Being kind to others.”

“The nuns are on about that all the time–but they don’t show us any patience,” complained Trish.

“Perhaps they are picking up on your impudence, young lady?”

“Wossat mean, pweese, Mummy?”

“Impudence is being cheeky.”

“Is you cheeky, Twish?”

“No–just ’cos they get things wrong an’ I tell em, they think I’m being imp–um–cheeky.”

“Oh yeah, Sister Gorgonzola, said Sydney was the capital of Australia and Trish told it wasn’t, it was Canberra.”

“And how did Trish tell her?” I asked.

Livvie blushed, “Um, she said something like, Don’t be daft, everyone knows it’s Canberra not Sydney, ’cept you.”

“I see, do you think that was the correct way to go about it?”

“Probbly not, she could of said it more politely.”

“Oh yeah, what should I’ve said? Please shut up you fat old bat, until you know what you’re talking about, thank you. Would that be polite, Mummy?” she giggled from the back seat it spread to the others in moments.

“No, it’s impolite and disrespectful to call someone names in front of others and to challenge an older person, especially one who has authority over you, is not only disrespectful it’s downright dumb. She has a capacity to make life difficult for you, so making her use it, isn’t the brightest thing in the world.”

“So what should I have done?”

“Lots of things, such as: Excuse me Sister Gonzales, but I believe the federal capital of Australia is Canberra.”

“Mine’s funnier,” laughed Trish.

“Mine is less likely to get you asked to leave the school, Trish–and remember, not everywhere would want to take you.”

“That’s not fair, Mummy, jus’ ‘cos of a stupid teacher who doesn’t know nothin’.”

“Trish, if she doesn’t know nothing, it must mean she knows something.”

“No it doesn’t,” she argued.

“It does, it’s a negative negative or double negative.”

“Sounds like double Dutch to me,” said Trish, smirking, and the others sniggered.

“And that sounds like cheek to me, young lady. When we get home you will write me a letter of apology and unless it sounds sufficiently contrite, Father Christmas will be passing your stocking by.”

“’t’snot fair,” she shouted back at me.

“Life isn’t, if it was, little girls would be polite and courteous and not try to ridicule their parents or teachers for cheap laughs.”

Once we got back, Trish went up to her room with her laptop and set about writing me a letter. I rejected the first two attempts as being insincere. I made dinner–or finished it up–a cottage pie. We ate when Simon came home and he announced after dinner that he wanted the kids to all stay at the table.

I continued clearing up until he asked me to return as I needed to hear it. “In recent weeks, I don’t know what has got into you lot but I am sick of being treated as a fool. I’m not, neither is your mother, Gramps nor Auntie Stella or Jenny. We’ve all been around a lot longer than you lot with a great deal more experience of many things.

“I’m growing tired of your bad temper, rudeness, cheekiness, dishonesty and disrespect. Your mother spends a great deal of time and effort in looking after you and to hear you muttering silly names under your breath at her, is not on.

“So–until I hear and see you behaving with a great deal more respect and politeness, Christmas is cancelled. In other words, you’ll get nothing. It will be just an ordinary day.

“As for, you, young lady,” he addressed Julie, “I’m confiscating the Mercedes. You won’t get it at all now. If however, you behave until Christmas, we’ll allow driving lessons and if you pass your tests–both theory and practical, I will get you a car–but it won’t be a Mercedes.”

“May I leave the table, Daddy?” asked Julie.

“Yes, you may.”

She rose, pushed her chair back under the table walked to the door and ran up the stairs sobbing. The others sat, mouths open and silent, with some watery eyes forming.

“Off you go,” he said.

“Mummy, do I still have to do the letter?”

“Very much so.”

“Oh.” Trish went upstairs with her tail between her legs.

“What letter is that, Babes?”

“She cheeked me on the way home from school–I told her she had to write me a letter of apology.”

“Good Lord, I’d never have thought of that–not in a million years.”

“When did she cheek, Sister Gonzales?” I asked Livvie.

“This morning, in geography.”

“Tell her she has to write a letter of apology to Sister Gonzales, too.”

“What’s all that about?” asked Simon.

“She corrected a nun about the name of the Australian capital.”

“What did the nun say?”

“Sydney–it’s Canberra.”

“I know, I’ve been to both places. Canberra is full of stuffed shirts, it’s like a museum, whereas Sydney is a very vibrant city.”

“A bit like London and Portsmouth,” I offered.

“Oh definitely,” he said winking, “Let’s face it, the last time anything happened here it was the sinking of the Mary Rose.”

We chatted and an hour later, I was presented with a sheet of paper.

Deer Mummy,

I am sorry I was rude to you. Orbital resonance made me spin out of control.

I love you.

Trish.

I showed it to Simon. He read it twice and laughed. “What does orbital resonance mean?”

“It means she‘s been watching Brian Cox instead of writing this letter.”

“Brian who?”

“Brian Cox, Professor of Physics at UMIST. He did a series of TV programmes on the solar system. He’s a bright chap works at Cern as well.”

“Cerne? Cerne Abbas?”

“No, darling, Cern as in Switzerland, large Hadron collider thingie.”

“Oh that Cern–of course, they only have a large tourist collider at Cerne Abbas.” There was a definite danger that Simon was actually going to say something really funny one day–probably more likely than a Higgs-Boson particle being found.

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Comments

Good to see some parental discipline

It rarely misses the mark if, as in this case, it is paired with love. It's also good to see Simon firmly putting his foot down and, at the same time, supporting Cathy.

S.

a tourist collider...

I think that qualifies as funny :)

Now, run up and check on Julie, 'cause she's about halfway out the window by now...

At last!

Simon and Cathy doing some real parenting, and working together—great to see. And what's more, Simon acting like one of the adults—we might have to mark this day down in history on the Bike Summaries (linked below).

Thanks A+B+I (Cottage Pie): Really enjoyed today's Bikesode.

Positive Spins


Bike Resources

Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1219.

Wow!

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Agree that Julie needs discipline

but she also needs the love side of tough love. Just letting her go off alone after dinner worries me a lot. The kid has serious issues and I don't like to think of what she might be up to alone.

Some tough love and

Some tough love and recall that "A little bit of kindness is needed in the world". Not sure if the extent of the punishment is good for Julie, but something has to make an impression.

CaroL

CaroL

Punishment Severity

Considering how badly her little stunt could have ended up, she's getting off lightly.

Sometimes, kids need a permanent consequence to keep them reminded of how serious things can be. Still, she needs unconditional love as badly as she needs to learn a lesson. Lots of hugs are in order.

When my son starts to get stubborn and argue his way into getting something that I said he can't have, I explain to him that it would be morally wrong for me to let him get what he wants with that kind of obnoxious behavior. Truthfully, the behavior that is subsidized will be repeated.

Are we sure Trish is only 6?

I mean, the cheekiness in her response (and second attempt with Cathy) sounds like something a teenager might say.

And then her use of orbital resonance? *shakes head...*

Thanks for today's episode.

Rejected!

Trish is still being a smart-arse.

Nice to see both parents

Nice to see both parents supporting and backing each other regarding the raising and punishment of their children. Definitely prevents the children from playing off one against the other. Julie needs some realize some "tough love", but she also needs to shown that she is indeed loved, even when she doesn't believe it.

Hooray for Simon!

I love the way he's supporting Cathy. Also, while the kids are great in many ways, it's all to easy for a young and talented person to cop an attitude of superiority. Simon and Cathy have their work cut out for them with that crew.

Oh, and the orbital resonance thing was just too much. It's humorous, but way too cheeky considering the nature of the offense and the purpose for the letter.

I have a teenager who kind of combines the challenges of Trish and Julie in one scruffy-bearded boy. Somebody just shoot me now.

Tourist Collider

My suspicion is that the 'Tourist Collider', is that particular part of the giant that draws new visitors attention very quickly. They are so shocked into 'rubberneck' mode that they crash each other's cars or simply walk into each other as they gaze in surprise, distraction, wonder, disgust or most often, amusement.
Anatomy lesson it aint'!
Very funny Angie. One of your more localised but very clever observations. I liked it.

Still lovin it

OXOXOX.

Beverly.

Growing old disgracefully.

bev_1.jpg

Nice to see Cathy

insist on good manners, Too often these days Children seem to forget that saying please and thank you often leads to greater reward's, Than the ignorance a lot of them show, Keep it up Cathy your children will certainly benefit from it in the future ..

Kirri

Hmmm...

Wendy Jean's picture

I've always felt mass punishment was wrong, but I get the feeling Simon is working toward something here. Besides the obvious I mean.

Julie and Trish will never learn.

Nice to see Simon is fed up with being thought of as rather dim !

That's good, I have things to do before the world ends, and I hate hitchhiking. Although, I do like Ford Galaxys .

Cefin