I had traveled back to my university in April making sure both of my independent studies were more than satisfactory; they once again drew honors. My January project was to help draw up the final plans for two of this year’s projects. One included a river and tributary cleanup of one watershed. It only covered about 10,000 acres but somehow got national news coverage. Come July I found myself drawing up similar plans for our part of upstate New York.

I complained to somebody who listened that while there was no shortage of trees too many shrub pines and trees that were not native to the areas were causing a diminishing of oaks and the hardwood trees that should inhabit the land. This led to a three-fold problem for me. I was tasked with more public speaking which was seen above my work. I was designing as well as implementing projects, and I was asked to get more schooling. My work rating was classified for those with a master’s degree.

Breann was amused, “I told you to get your master’s degree but no you wanted to get to work and get your wife pregnant.”

We were only beginning to work to get my wife pregnant, and income needs even with her having a Pell grant necessitated me working. It is one of those things one doesn’t mind especially as I’m helping to change the world. Getting women involved helped in getting guys involved so the initial workforces showed up.

The first injection of sperm into Bree didn’t take nor did the second but in October everyone watched her progress very closely and we were sure by Thanksgiving she’s pregnant. We weren’t telling anyone until her sister Liz guessed after Christmas. She caught Bree in a playful mood and said, “That’s not my sister stressing out and wanting to have a baby?”

Bree’s reply was, “We’re not telling anyone yet.” When it became known she was over two months pregnant I needed to call my parents as well. This was doubly good news for them as Katie had become with child shortly after her Labor Day wedding.

It wasn’t easy on my ego that I was the odd person out in getting pregnant. Yes, I know it is not biologically possible, but it doesn’t make being me easier. I find my emotions swinging as I’m excited that we have a baby on the way. She’s my daughter as well. Yes, we’re hoping the baby’s a girl, but would love a boy as well. It is just easier saying one thing and not it or she/he.

Bree even into her fifth month does not look very pregnant. It is however the time we receive the news that she’s having twins.

Bree’s wrapping up her dissertation defense and I’ve been helping to organize things for her as well as me. I am happy that Bree and I share our like for Prof. Dr. Hagen. I have her at night and she’s Bree’s chief professor. She holds us to the task but is caring in doing so.

It probably didn’t hurt that she had an accident nearby and took shelter in our apartment for the night.

It was the week before Easter that Bree successfully defended her dissertation and qualified for her degree.

It was Dr. Hagen who decided that I had enough experience to qualify as two courses toward my master’s degree. With the many brilliant women studying, working, and instructing around the Rochester area; I am fortunate in being noticed. But as one photo-journalist said, “You’re the one who can run the fields and look like a deer in doing so.” She had in fact caught a series of pictures of me running and jumping over a tree stump. DNR rangers do not look especially graceful in uniform, but Lisa caught me responding to an emergency, and it made the news. One of my volunteers was shoved away and hurt by a logger.

We had given them permission to log some of our cleared trees, but the culprit involved forgot he was working in a public area. That I got in his face and reminded him he was an invited guest was tough for him to hear. Apologies and recompense came for the injured volunteer and others disturbed. We were fortunate to have some of it visually documented.

I could have called it a day for my workers and me, but I chose instead that it needed to be the loggers who displaced themselves and leave for two days. Free logs, were of enough benefit that they acquiesced to our requests. No, I am not a senior officer or with that much clout, but I had the support and appreciation of those that do.

It is early June with five weeks before Bree’s due date that she’s requiring more time off of her legs and pampering. I have given up some work and took only one summer class, and I am mostly reviewing new projects not fully planning them. Susan Dorft is with us and while I’d like my mom too. There’s not the room or ability to put up with more estrogen.

I take to wearing a ranger’s skirt even where it is less than ideal. Katie seeing a picture of me likens it to Gary in his running skirt. I am not missing being Gary, but I desire more time being girly.

Bree and I have impressed most and upset few being in Lamaze classes together. Cerera, one would be moms, invited her sister to be with her once we showed up. I am sure it is not uncommon but women are sensitive not to cause grief. Women being there for women as I say is common here. But the one sister was not wanting to be seen to be like me or lesbian women. Her sister Cora was tense and straining in being there for her sister this one week. That was until I began massaging her shoulders and she was a bundle of tight knots. Luckily for Cora and the head nurse; another participant was massage specialist.

That evening was extra-long as Cora’s tension also needed her to allow being touched and loved. It wasn’t settled in one night, but her sister was a different woman walking away.

My joy came in how well Bree handled the birthing of our twins. Kayla was born with a lock of dark hair, the birth came rather easily born at 11:47 at night while our second child gave us a delay. False labor started an hour later and a half-hour after that. It was heart-warming as Bree was back to being herself and twenty minutes after two she eased into labor and the delivery went smoothly. The baby’s name was supposed to be different but Gloria which had been a choice of both of us became her name once we saw her.

The multiple delays in Breann’s labor were unusual and I feared it might be emotionally weighing on Breann. She herself said it was like an epiphany, that she heard a bird or angelic sound, and her spirit lifted. A meteor was reported to have gone over upstate New York and brightened the sky that night. Grandma Susan had even seen it from the waiting room.

We got a double dose of what we wanted and that was fine with the two of us. Both Grandmothers were soon here though they were required to alternate taking night shifts. Both Grandmothers were pleased when they were with Bree when she was nursing. I was the one who carried the babies, burped, and changed them. I was awestruck by their little hands and fingers. I thought they responded even to my speaking. Grandma Dorft said, “That’s how my children were with their father after they were born. Someone said they recognize your voice from when they were in the womb.” It gave me an added joy, whether it was true or not. That I had already been an impression upon their lives.

My having my mother was short-lived as Katie is nearing her due date and we agree she’s to be there with my sister. It was the third week of our twin's birth that I made an overnight trip to see Katie and her baby Colin. Needless to say, Todd and Katie were ecstatic with Colin. Like them, we’re hoping one of our girls will carry on the Dorft name. Though we giggle that it is all in the genes and it will be our girls who give birth to the next generation.

I was an honorary guest at the tenth alumni graduation gathering of Katie, Sarai, and the class before mine. People were wanting to know what happened to Gary Miller; the boy who ran in a girl’s running skirt and went to their prom. I believe more than half were quite surprised to see me as Caryn. Though I was attractive, better educated, and further along in a career than most would have imagined. Breann was now sporting a Ph.D. and I have my master’s degree and many recognitions for work in my field.

Katie had pictures of Colin and Casey; Sarai had finally broken training and is beginning her family. That Bree and I have Kayla, Glory, and Krystin and a home, off one of the Finger Lakes is a nice achievement. I was with Krystin able to get my breasts to lactate and be able to nurse her. We found it very rewarding for me and very helpful for Breann pursuing her doctorate.

I have met classmates from high school, college, and grad school at seminars and environmental panels. Everyone’s achievements seem small to me when we use satellite pictures. Petty judgments get to me now and then. The other side of the coin is I am one of the happier people that I know.

I am proud that Heather and several other little sisters are reasonably healthy. Heather is at Auggie and is known as an aunt to our girls. And true to our word she gets a yearly visit. She does have a monthly visitor and hopefully will be able to have children of her own.

Bree and I are proud the first day of kindergarten to see Glory and Kayla off to school. Lesbian couples are not so rare, and like with others, we come with various degrees of health and wellbeing. Not everyone agrees when I say I’m a woman or we’re a lesbian couple. It is just how we see ourselves.

Has Breann ever strayed or wished she had a husband; she hesitates some of the time in saying no. I can’t say I don’t see other women or even men attractive, but I haven’t been tempted enough to go there. *^_^*

Several times I’ve met or been contacted by someone who sees themselves as transgender and asks me for advice. I come away mostly having listened, and encourage them to take their time. Different from me all three find themselves more strongly attracted to men. One has become a friend and sends me pictures of their family as it grows.