Breann was at Sioux Falls with and we were quite involved when I mentioned the sperm I had saved. She gave me a big kiss and then said, “I thought you might have. What caused you to mention it now?”

“I was thinking our relationship was getting serious, and that maybe I should?”

Breann says, “I do love you, but I think we need to both be graduates from college before we consider getting married... Do you think we’d do well in making babies and raising a family together?” It was a short-time later that Bree asked, “I see us as a lesbian couple. Are you comfortable being seen by our children as their mother along with me?” That led to a door being closed and more passion expressed.

It was fun over the course of the next few months to draw closer and be in love. Between the surgery, continuing to receive hormones, and my body making more of its own hormones I was becoming more sensitive as a woman.

It was nice as Breann and I both became more open to the friends of the other and secure in our relationship. Come summer, Breann had a little over a semester left of classes. She had won a research grant involving two of Minnesota’s lakes. She would be working with one of her professors. Dr. Conover invited me to do a work-study program for the summer with them. “I will be demanding of both of you and you won’t always be together. But you might as well find out if you can work together?”

"The work would include studying the tributaries as well as the small river joining them together.” It included many water samples throughout the area. Weighing fish and other water life before we released them. We did have a daily quota of fish we could keep to eat.

I had not been as big of a fish eater as I became that summer. I was becoming a Midwestern woman. The university and Sioux Falls were becoming home. The lakes and wildlife of Minnesota were capturing my heart. Even the cities were progressive, and open by and large. And working with Bre grounded me with her.

I had negotiated time off in June to be part of Sarai"s wedding to Dennis Olivette. Debra from the cross-country team, Ashley, and Sarai’s sister Rachel were all part of the Bridal party. The wedding was beautiful and held at the university’s arboretum. Many of the flowers were blooming and added to the fragrance of the wedding.

Dr. Elizabeth Conover had insisted that Breann was on duty for the weekend. Breann being a fellowship worker was busy harvesting some of the early findings for the project. Dr. Conover reminded me that I held a different position and different responsibilities. That became more apparent as the summer progressed and I was under Breann’s direction a number of times.

Dr. Horace Daufelt from my university had stopped later in July to assess my summer job and what I was learning. I was fearful that he would find fault with my experience. He was amused that I thought I was being slighted.

Dr. Daufelt assured me that I was learning valuable experience. “I take,” he said, “you and Ms. Breann are close friends. You have been verifying important information and doing your work and research. But you and Ms. Breann are neither the same nor quite the same in your positions… I think Dr. Conover is giving you an experience more valuable than you are realizing. Even if one is in love I dare say the relationship is not as equal as one might suspect.

“From what I have observed, your reports, and what I’ve heard from Dr. Conover you are doing quite well.”

“Dr. Daufelt…”

He interrupts me, “Please call me Horace, away from campus.”

“Dr. Daufelt… sorry, Mr. Horace. This summer study is new to me and I’m often doing the work but not sure of things. Ms. Breann Dorft says it's normal, but I haven’t had as much responsibility, without more supervision.”

Dr. Daufelt says, “Well, yes, you’ll be finding that is often true in environmental work and research. Even Dr. Conover does not have all the parameters she would like or sometimes too many. She says, your status is not quite the same as your close friend. But she hopes that too is part of your learning experience.”

It is early-August and the lake water is still very cold different from New Jersey. Though I am getting acclimated to it more. Insect repellent is as important as sunblock though. We joke that mosquitoes are the state bird. I have a reasonably good tan, better than usual.

We’re done soon with our summer project and Breann and I are relaxing back at the Dorft home. We‘re out on Lake Okoboji boating. Breann is a natural water skiing, and it took me the better part of a morning to stand on the skis and another two days to stay up much longer than a minute and to be able to manage the wake of the boat as it turned. It is different from running, but I have the advantage of being in good shape.

We are blessed that Breann’s parents are comfortable with us and that I’m well received by many of her friends. Tami and Jeff two of her closest friends and I take time to warm up to one another.

It was while we were there, Breann came to me with a smile where I knew something was up. She had taken my left hand and before I realized what was happening, she said, “This is a promise ring. When we are ready, will you marry me?”

I broke into tears, using my fists and hitting her, and crying as I spoke, “But you said we wouldn’t?”

“Sue me… What is your answer?”

“Yes! Yes! Can I share your name?” The rest of that day and night were lost in oblivion. I knew I called home and my sister. Breann’s folks knew it was coming and we had their blessing with strong words to the effect that we finish our education.

It was Breann passion and having her way with me in bed that put everything else into a fog. It was delightful to wake up and find the blue sapphire ring on my hand. I rolled over and gave Breann a luscious kiss.

It was a moment later her sister Liz knock hard on the door. “I hope you two love birds aren’t going to stay in there all day. I want you to take me shopping?”

I asked, “What’s so special that you want to go shopping for?”

“I want to show the two of you off. Some of my friends want to size you up, to see if you’re good enough for my sister.”

Breann pushes me out of bed and yells to her sister we’re getting up.

“Are you two decent,” Liz asked? And with a yes she bumped the door open and came in.

Breann asks, “And what do you think you’re doing, barging in here like that?

“You’re both women like me,” she said. “I was wondering what she looks like?”

“Caryn, can I ask you something sensitive?”

“I guess like what?”

She asked, “Did you always want to be a girl? What was it like to change?”

Breann said, “That is a little too personal. Why don’t you leave us alone and let us get dressed?”

I said, “I think it’s a fair question. But like your sister said, why don’t you let us get dressed?”

Liz smiled, “I like your reply better. I’ll see you at the breakfast table.” And she left the room, closing the door behind her.

Breann assured me that I didn’t need to answer Liz and if it was too much we didn’t even have to take her shopping.

The discussion started over pancakes and sausages. Mrs. Dorft tried to act like she wasn’t listening at first. “Liz, the big change began when I was running cross-country in high school and a girl challenged me about who was faster. I was faster, but I also tensed up at times when someone was challenging me. Sarai was our fastest runner for the girls and I was faster as the third guy on our team. It ended with me losing to her and having to dress as a girl for a homecoming date with her. I also needed to practice with her.”

I expected to be embarrassed and humiliated, but the first time we ran together Sarai made it fun and I was soon having fun running faster and better. I still ran as a guy, but I had decided to do it in a running skirt as a joke. I hadn’t dated until I dated Sarai who became a best friend. I had been a shy nerd kind of guy. But the girls including my sister were nice to me and I found it nice having friends and being liked. Sarai became my best friend and girlfriend.”

Liz asked, “Is that when you started liking to be a girl?”

“Kind of, it was like things kept snowballing. Hunting for a prom dress and getting the other things a girl needs, making it fun and more joyful. Kissing her with lip-gloss on was more of a turn-on than I was willing to admit. Then, one of my grandmothers wanted to see me dressed as Caryn and even come to Thanksgiving as her granddaughter.”

We then got interrupted to go shopping and Liz would say things, like: “I don’t see how you could have been a guy… I thought you got recruited as a runner for the Augustana cross-country team and that’s special.”

Once we were on our way to the mall, we stopped to pick up Carly; Liz, and Breann’s cousin. And true to what Liz had said, we got introduced and shown off to other girls. Most of them had heard that Breann liked girls, but was not used to seeing college girls liking each other. We didn’t do anything more special than to hold hands and the way we spoke. Liz, Carly, Hanna, and Nan were busy shopping but liked showing what they were liking and interested in our opinions. By three o’clock we had filled our vehicle and Hanna’s with shopping and were in the mall in the food court eating our snack.

Two guys wanted to sit with us; they were probably first-year college guys. Liz was upfront, “We don’t need guys, but maybe the next time we’ll be interested. My sister and her girlfriend are showing us how to be independent.” Carly, Hanna, and Nan all chimed in that they were enjoying themselves.

Once the guys were gone and we were finished with our snacks. The girls were wanting all of us to clean up in the women’s room. Carly spoke up, “Liz said her sister in wanting you to help her shop for a workout outfit. We’d all like to look at that stuff if you don’t mind?”

Breann was sure they wanted to see me in a workout outfit. And it was obvious when I first appeared in one that they were staring to make sure I didn’t have any sign of a boy showing. It wasn’t new with them, but like with most others, it soon became a moot point.

Breann made it a point to Liz and Carly that future times together were not to be show and tell.

Two days later Breann and I were going our separate ways to college.

My Mom and Dad would come to see me as part of their vacation. We met Breann at Pipestone and enjoyed two nights there visiting and seeing the scenery. My folks liked Breann as her parents did with me. My parents were not fully happy that it appeared that I’d stay in the Midwest to be close to Breann.

Before they left, Mom asked, “Would the friendship ring be more like an engagement ring?”

Breann gave me a hug and I gave her a kiss, “We’re trying to pace ourselves, but I am sure I love her for always.” Mom and Dad embraced the two of us, and my Mom snuck a gift card into my hands.

Dad said he would put more money into my account that was toward us, meaning Breann and me. My eyes watered. I thought it was probably going to be a hundred dollars or two. The deposit was five thousand dollars, which moved me to happy tears.

Dad and mom wrote a note, “Finish college, and if you get a good job, you might want to think of marrying her as she continues her graduate studies and research work?”

Mom and Dad were gone and I was registered for the new semester. I wasn’t running for university, but I would continue to be busy. I joined the Archaeology Club and added an archaeology class for the second semester. Breann and students at Auggie had suggested that it would provide background information as well as be a good way to relax.

I joined Breann for her last student homecoming. Football wasn’t going to hold our interest. Their women’s hockey team set up an exhibition game between the current team and alumni. That was neat, and the women opened me to new ways of seeing things.

I met more of Breann’s friends and acquaintances. While it is an impressive school and serving Breann well; it helped me appreciate being at Sioux Falls. Breann had a suite that provided her with a private bedroom and study area. She was not one to fend for herself, so being on campus worked well for her.

Auggie’s homecoming was the following week but schedules did not permit Breann to share it with me. We were together at semester break but got into an argument. We had rendezvoused, but I soon left when we got into our argument. I left and went back to university. I had stopped on the way back as I had a nervous problem requiring a pitstop. When I got to my room I have Breann sitting at the door. We weren’t quickly in agreement, but my differences with her we not that significant. Breann gave me a hug, “You can’t walk out on me like that. I guess we are both stubborn.”

We mutually agreed to differ, but not stay angry. “Caryn, I’m glad you got angry enough to risk my disliking you.” I had tried so hard at pleasing her that it came out with me exploding at her. Making up with her was fun. later, Sarai had stopped by with a bottle of wine and cheese. She stayed to share the first glass but was happy that I’d get to work it out with Bree.

Breann should have been back to Mankato but she stayed the night with me and left early…

Story to be continued…