Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 563.

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Wuthering Doorchimes
(aka Bike)
Part 563
by Angharad
       
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My two obnoxious passengers became quite quarrelsome on the drive to the hospital. Why is that kids or pets play up when you feel least able to deal with it? They can sense the stress I suppose.

I stopped at traffic lights, “Look, if you two don’t behave yourselves, I’ll make you stay in the car while I go and see Gramps.”

“’S’not fair,” huffed Trish. I was wondering if I could a part exchange her at the children’s home, trade her in for someone less demanding.

“’S’not,” echoed Mima.

“Life isn’t fair, that’s just the way it goes.” I tried to be philosophical in the hope it would calm me down.

“Why?” pouted Trish, I could see her in the rearview mirror.

“Why what?” I asked.

“Why isn’t life fair?” she asked.

“S’not,” said Mima, who I was beginning to think was referring to her nasal passages.

“I don’t know, but it isn’t–well–some times it is and sometimes it isn’t. It’s just the way it is. Why does it rain when you want to mow the lawn or go for a walk?”

“ ‘S’not,” repeated Mima, who made me think she’d got her needle stuck.

“But why, Mummy, why?”

“I don’t know, Trish, if I did, I would tell you. There is no answer, it’s just randomness, which is often what seems to be as much an influence as anything else.”

“What’s randomness, Mummy.”

“’S’not,” said you know who.

“Happenstance–no that’s no good, coincidence–not much better, um, it just happens, without rhyme or reason.” Oh bugger, why does she always ask these things when my brain is in hibernation mode?

“What’s a happerance?”

“A what?”

“The thing you said, a happerance.”

“No, I said happenstance, it means something that just happens without a reason.” The way this is going, I’ll have strangled them both by the time we get to Tom. Why couldn’t I just say it was all God’s fault? They can hardly prove me wrong, can they? Well not a for a few months anyway.

“I wanna go wee wee,” said Mima, very loudly.

I pulled over to the side of the road and stood her over the drain cover in the gutter. I held her while she weed. As soon as she was back in her seat, Trish wanted to go. I wonder if I could plead, justifiable homicide–or is that one of those things that only happens in ‘Merican cop shows?

We finally got underway again, and a Jaguar went flashing past. Thankfully, Batman and Robin didn’t notice it, they were two busy planning their next assault on my good nature.

It didn’t come, but the waiting for the second shoe to drop meant my nerves were frayed anyway. I parked the car and only went to get the ticket, but because I didn’t take them with me, they thought I was abandoning them and they screamed the place down. That’ll teach me to make idle threats.

“What is all this noise about?” I asked angrily. They really were pushing my buttons.

“We thought you were going to leave us in the car,” said a sobbing Trish.

“You weft us,” sniffed Mima.

“I went to get the ticket to park the car, you pair of silly geese.” I got them both out of the car and wiped their faces with the flannel I always took out with me. Pippa hadn’t given me much advice about caring for kids, but she did say she always took a damp flannel in a plastic bag to wipe hands or any other bit that needed wiping. In Mima’s case, the prediction she’d been making most of the way here, had now actualised, and I wiped her runny nose.

I made Mima hold my hand and Trish hold Mima’s. In my other hand, I carried some more stuff for Stella, and one or two things for Tom. We called by the UCI. They had doctors doing rounds, so the sister wasn’t happy about me bringing the children in.

“I only want to change her nighties over. I won’t be a tick, and she’d love to see my kids.”

She narrowed her eyes, “You have five minutes. If the children cause any sort of disruption, I’ll wash them down the sluice.

“If they do, I’ll help you,” I replied, which seemed to take her by surprise.

Stella was awake. She still looked awful, but smiled when she saw my two fidgets enter her cubicle. “What does this do?” asked Trish pressing the alarm button.

I hit the reset before anyone came. I grabbed her hand, and dragging her to the chair, plonked her in it and said threateningly, “If you so much as breathe, I am going to give you back to the children’s home.” Of course as soon as I said it, I knew I’d said the wrong thing.

“You said, I could stay with you for as long as I wanted,” she said before bursting into tears.

“Hush,” I said to her while grabbing Mima, who was about to wander off. “Talk to Auntie Stella,” I said to them both. They chattered as I collected her dirty nightdress and put out a clean one.

“How do you feel?” I asked Stella.

“Bloody awful, but nice of you to ask.”

“How’s Puddin’?”

“Desdemona, is holding her own.”

“Desdemona? Is that what you’re calling her?”

“Yes, after her daddy, what’s wrong with that?”

“Okay, I only asked.”

“Well what else could I have called her?”

“Desiree, or even Elaine.”

“Elaine? What for?”

“I was thinking of a pet name of Lainey.”

“Oh I see.”

“Can we have a pet, Mummy?” asked Trish.

“We have a dog. We don’t need anything else.”

“I wanna goadfish.” I visualised a tank of piranhas and throwing them both in. Nah, they'd still find the skeletons.

After everyone kissed Stella, we moved on to Tom’s ward. He was walking with a stick, up and down the ward when we got there. The two brats rushed to hug him and nearly knocked him down. I wondered if the local zoo would take them? I’d never known them this naughty, boisterous or clumsy.

“Girls,” said Tom loudly. “Careful, you’ll have me over.”

“Miss Watts, please control your children, it isn’t visiting time, so any more disruption and they’ll have to leave.” The staff nurse read the riot act. One more thing and I was going to book myself in with a nervous breakdown and let someone else worry about the kids.

“Right. You two horrors, sit there and don’t move,” I hissed at them. I heard Tom chuckle, but resisted the urge to slap him. As I packed up all his stuff he walked round the other beds with one of the girls on each hand. Of course the other men made a fuss of them, so they stopped crying and ate their recently acquired handfuls of fruit and sweets.

We strolled back to the car, Tom spotted Simon’s car and was about to say something when I changed the subject. “He’s in seeing Henry.”

“If you want to go and take the kids to see him, I’ll happily wait in the car.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, go ahead.”

“Half an hour tops, okay?”

“Fine.”

“Come on, girls, let’s go and see Grandpa Henry.”

They almost frothed with excitement, and we walked back into the hospital again. Much to my surprise, Trish was uneasy in the lift, whereas Meems, wasn’t.

As we walked along the corridor to the ward, I asked her why she didn’t like the lift? “I got stuck in one at the home. Danny Gleeson jammed the door and I couldn’t get out.”

“Well that won’t happen here, they’re serviced regularly.” However, I made a mental note to walk back down the stairs in case I’d tempted Providence. I couldn’t find any wood to touch.

They went crazy when they saw Simon at the bedside. But he scooped them up and hugged them into submission. I wasn’t strong enough to do that. Henry was pleased to see them. He was in a side ward, which he was pleased about and he hadn’t had to pay for it.

“So what happened?” I asked him.

“Truck came through the central crash barrier, engine came back onto my legs. Took them an hour to cut me out.”

“Wow, how horrible, how are you now?”

“I’ll live, but I don’t think I’ll be racing you on a bike for a while.”

“I look forward to doing that again, but I’ll give you a week or two to train for it.”

He chatted with the children and they made a fuss of him. His legs were in plaster of Paris, and they were magnets to Trish’s wandering hands. Fortunately, he couldn’t feel her touching his toes and the edges of the plaster casts. I wondered if they did strait-jackets in her size?

I asked if there was any washing, and Simon produced Henry’s dirty clothes from the accident. I shoved them in a bag to take home and wash. “What about spare pyjamas and so on?” I asked.

“I bought some more on the way in,” said Simon, “I’ll get someone to go to the house and pick up some more stuff. Where’s Tom?”

“In the car, so we’d better go. Come on, you pair of monsters. Let's go and see Grandpa Tom.”

“Thanks for bringing them in. Have you seen Stella?”

“Yes, she’s making slow progress, but she is awake.”

“What about the baby?”

“I don’t know, have you been up there, Si?”

“Not today, leave the kids here with me and slip up there quickly.” I didn’t need telling twice. She looked much the same, small and pale with tubes in every orifice and wires attached to the rest. I couldn’t resist touching her again, and once again stroked her head and told her to grow big and strong, then her leg and told it to, heal and grow strong. I don’t know why I did so, it was as if something or somebody was telling me to do it. I had an impression of my mother nearby, but decided that was just my tiredness and an overwrought imagination.

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