So, about everyone knows that I live in Portland, Oregon in a 6 story, 50 unit apartment building. I am told that there are 4 other T folk in this building. I have seen one of them, tried to make conversation, and you can guess where that went.

Across the street from me is another 6 story apartment building and on the 6th floor is another one of us.

I promise, NO Drama.

Since 2005, I have been determined to forge a place in society for myself and those like me. I've stubbornly insisted and fought for a place in society as a woman, and to an amazing extent, that dream has been realized. It has been a long time since anyone has challenged me on the street or off it.

In spite of my total lack of understanding, the Mormon members around me have been kind and healing and supportive. That the upper management of the church has issues with those like me, actually arouses the ire of the members.

I spend a lot of time on Facebook talking about things that matter to me. Oddly, I have yet to be confronted on TG issues, and this is surprising to me because I have pictures and everything right there.

A couple different people including the TED group put up things about Transgender folk and gratifyingly they were supportive and not snide at all. Perhaps things are turning around for us?

Sure, there were those who demonstrated their hate and ignorance. I think the anger was mostly manifested by the profoundly ignorant.

Khadijah

So, in my frustration with several issues, I went to the local barber shop and got a buzz cut, and now there is no hair on my head longer than 1/8th inch. Why do people do this?

In my own situation, growing up with nasty, brutal men, I hated them, and I hated being one of the enemy even worse, and did not accept that idea without struggle. Then, what did I do but marry a young woman who herself had been abused awfully, and in her adult years became a rabid feminist. So after a while, I could never be right, or even OK. Looking back, I just wanted to be on the winning side. It was a choice to just walk away from her like so many other young males did at the time.

OK, I've been writing one that is clear out of somewhere else. There is a lot of quirky dialogue. All the perfectionists that are here need to remember is this is not English class.

You might think it is one thing, but maybe it's not.

Gwen

I suppose this will only mean something to you if you really, really want to be a woman. If you are just playing in girl's clothes, drinking beer, burping and bellowing at footie games, perhaps not so much.

I do not know how many of you here play Video Games. Every time I have tried some "guy" just kills me and walks away. Grrrr

So I had not thought of it much anymore until I heard Anita Sarkeesian speak on YouTube about how sexist video games are. Listening to her speak wakened something in me that I can best describe perhaps as being "Pissed Off, spitting mad!

Got a nasty surprise tonight when I fired up SKYPE. Last week it was fine. Tonight it is showing my REAL NAME! I went steaming down to the Microsoft store, ready to ... I don't know what! Instead of yell and cuss, I started crying. DAMN !

So, the guy patted me on the shoulder and told me I was going to be alright.

He changed my name on SKYPE twice and it changed it back again.

I just turned on SKYPE when I got home to return someone's call, but I now see it is 12:15 AM where she is. I'll try it tomorrow.

So, I heard somewhere, perhaps from a Doctor, that SRS and female hormones lessen the risk of or prevent Prostrate Cancer. I've been on hormones since around 95', and had SRS in 2007.

Gwen

So, I finally got moved into my palace in the sky (4th floor) down by the river. Everything was going fairly smoothly until I started dealing with our Government. Social Security was actually not too bad if one can accept the hour and a half of divining their secrets of joining on line. Wow, talk about secret squirrel !

Well, I got moved to an Apartment building down by the river, here in Portland. So, there is a Transgender woman on the 4th floor with me, but I have not done more than catch sight of her as she walked around the corner.

Wish me luck please, Cathy, Bev, and Beth and anyone else who's listening. Tomorrow morning I am moving to a place that has nursing care available should I need it. AND, it will be $250/Mo cheaper than where I am now. Hopefully, this will enable me to resume writing and have a bit of peace.

Pulling the plug now on SKYPE and will perhaps be back on line by Friday?

Much peace

Gwen

There are a number of very good authors here who essentially work for free here and there are some who are just beginning who need our encouragement. There are some whose work does not appeal to me for various reasons, and those of you who like their work should be supportive of them.

Oh MY GOSH!!!

I just was at a website on a non TG subject, the name of which is "Not To Be Spoken". :), where one of my favorite authors has revealed HIS identity.

YESSSSSS, 50 Shades Trailer is out now !!! Honest they didn't do anything bad, YET ! Valentines day 2015 !!!! GASP ~!~~~

And, he is so, so handsome, charming and oh YEAH sinister !!!!

The past is always ready to bite us, um there.

Captain, Oh My Captain is pure TG and straight from my heart. I left it needing a bit of editing because I wanted to present a woman who was not quite coherent much of the time. I wanted to preserve the disorderly thinking.

So those who are tempted to pull the edit sword, be careful what you toy with.

It is my hope that both my fans will enjoy this glimpse into the mind of a crazed woman.

Khadija Gwen

I just finished reading an Anne McGaffery trilogy, "Petabea", and as I reflect on the experience I actually feel that there are not a few authors here who are equal or perhaps better than her. I have loved her writing for quite a long time, and my comments are not meant in any way to demean her skills. They are rather comments on how well some of you do and how pleased I am that some of you have chosen to put themselves out on the open market and give it a go.

I saw this bit on Facebook but have been unable to find anything else about play times or locations. Can someone please keep me apprised of the situation?

Tomorrow I will have been on the road for 12 days, and If I could afford it, I would just live on the road. All someone would have to do is give me a couple thousand a month. Right.

Well, to those two or three who wonder what mischief I am up to, I am gone until the 28th or so.

Gwen

I hate to sound like a Catholic Nun or something. Several of you from BCTS are my friends on Facebook and everyone has respected my caveat about being too open about T stuff there until now.

I love and respect so many of you. Those of you that have not been able to transition and live like I have are the brave, courageous ones. There is nothing brave about transitioning and having surgery. I just did what I wanted to do. It is you that sacrificed to keep the lives you have that are brave.