My Super Secret Life… Diamond 5

Chapter 5

It is so unreal going shopping with Sunny and Mom. I mean I’ve never seen my Mom remade like this at all and after getting kissed by Dad like she had been she’s very much back to being or feeling like the girl that she was before me and marriage and work and bills and stuff.

It’s a strange thing when Sunny get’s us some bottles of water and some energy shakes in a can to take with us.

“Why are we?”

Mom laughs. “Oh Terry I think we’re shopping with a professional.”

Sunny nods. “It’s just to keep us going a spree like this you need to keep your energy up and to stay hydrated.”

Then we’re heading into the place that I’ve always feared to tread the Oasis-Grande Galleria. I mean there’s lots of malls around Paradise City but this is “The” mall it’s right in the zone between the casino zones and the ultra rich district of the city where my school is at and what’s Sunny’s home turf.

The place is where everyone who’s cool goes shopping and where guys like I used to be would like to go and see what we’d want to see like everyone else but it’s also where the vicious packs of the cool kids roam and would hunt the people like me for sport.

I’m really scared actually.

The last time that I set foot in here I was bothered, bugged and teased into leaving but not before I got dumped buy guys on the lacrosse team into one of the fountains and got lots and lots of Whale jokes aimed at me.

And other jokes.

Those big baggy concealing t-shirts don’t hide your moobs when it’s wet. There are way too many bad memories of then for me and I’m scared to death of a repeat performance here.

But Sunny is so damned fearless or rather fearsome as she begins to look over the places her and she takes out her smart-phone and she’s doing something…?

Okay, here’s where my reality takes another swerve. I know Sunny’s smart, she’s altered and stuff but I see her going through the mall directory locking in a search engine to go through the site for the stores in the mall that we’re going to be interested in and to look for the things that are on sale plus to collect the digital coupons?

“Wow…that kind of cool and really smart.” I’m looking over her shoulder and actually having a hard time keeping up with what she’s doing.

“Hmm? Oh yeah sort of I’m not sure who came up with the idea but everyone does it.” She gestures at several groups of girls that have their phones out. And That’s when it hits me with the swerve. Smart is kind of as pertains to your experience. I can out-comic-trivia any of these girls but they have this stuff down.

So maybe the whole perception that I’ve got about these girls isn’t anymore right than the ones they had about me?

The rest is like she’s taken the stuff the cops must be teaching her at The Tower and she’s taking us through the shops in the mall like she’s SWAT or is the Swatch?

I’m nervous at first and like I said even scared but it kind of starts to fade as I start having fun. No I didn’t become female and get the shopping gene but a lot of this is a free shopping spree and that’s always cool then there’s me just actually being all superficial and liking it.

I’m a girl, that’s not going to get cured.

I used to be severely comeliness challenged, and teased and kind of a social pariah.

I’m not Sunny stunning but I think I really am looking good, pretty even and maybe attractive. So when I’m trying on all these things that change my look, but still make me look good.

It’s fun for me. It’s a lot more fun too when I see my Mom buying things for herself that we or she couldn’t afford at all y’know. I hear her say. “Oh my god I’ve always wanted to have one of these a lot.”

Y’know too Sunny…Sunny’s awesome because it goes right into the cart and Mom’ll say.

“Sunny, we can’t. I can’t justify needing this.”

And she’ll say something like. “You need this to set an example of social skills such as attire for you son…oh…you have a daughter…hmmm, who’s fault was that? Seriously they say one word tell me. This is handled.”

It’s like she’s almost playing big sister to both of us.

Very cool.

There’s a challenge though in a lot of clothes in finding shops that carry stuff to fit me and the fantastic-fours…. Yeah 44 FF’s are a challenge in a lot of varieties of stuff.

But I look good in sweaters, and if I can wear and open shirt with a tank top or chemise kind of thing I look really good. I love my sharktail hoodie because of my inner geek really it looks good on me and it sorta has this hooded robe like effect.

Zip front track suits wit yoga pants are cool and comfy and I can wear things that are pretty too. No, I’m not brainwashed about pretty stuff every guy out there sees things that are pretty even if he’d never say the words. I have a this great track suit with the zip jacket top that’s this almost matching my hair shade but has these white printed flowers all over it and it still looks pretty and it’s really girly but it also looks great on me.

The tee-shirts are easy and Sunny actually takes my to the guys section too because some of the edgy stuff they have in shirt designs are great. We buy some great band t-shirts too and even a couple of guys formal shirts because on of those over my cut offs and my bikini will look killer laid back for going to the beach.

My biggest thing that I found hard was nice tops and blouses the non-formal kind and Sunny says that if I’m going formal and not in a dress then I’m best to get something tailored.

Skirts, skirts aren’t that bad actually except for the longer clinging stretchy ones that sort of force your legs together and you have to walk weird. I’m not all that freaked at wearing a short skirt either though they’re a lot like wearing shorts really but you have uhm…more air and have to be more careful.

Actually here in Paradise City we’re a really warm place in the summertime and I can see these being something that I’d wear. I made sense to Sunny and Mom was surprised and vetoed a couple of the one I was looking at as well as Sunny under the grounds of too skanky.

I’m still sort of seeing and shopping with a guy’s eye. I’m going with their judgement because I really don’t want to be a skanky looking girl.

Dresses…I like dresses for the same reason as the skirts and more…if you find a dress that you really like and you are comfortable with and feel pretty when you look in the mirror the dress really tends to make you feel that way the entire time that you’re wearing it.

I really like the look and feel of wearing a peasant dress, the off the shoulders thing and the way it looks with my breasts and there just something kind of soulfully me that comes out when I wear it…I bought like five of them.

I also like drape necked dresses, and these ones called a “New Pagoda dress” that has this sleeveless top but it folds over in the top like a martial arts jacket with a v-neck to it and they come in lots of oriental styles.

I like them because they’re all sexy, girly kung fu like and that pleases my inner geek-girl and they’re really light and comfortable and made my boobs look awesome. I’ve got this grey one trimmed with just white that with my hair makes me look like I’m one of those non-oriental hot anime babes.

I also get a black one and a white one because they look actually good as formal wear.

I get three LBD’s or little black dresses and some tank dresses and a navy blue grey crocheted knit that had this hood and it clung to me and made me look kinda good.

Leggings and jeggings these too I own a lot of now too. it seems like an awful lot of stuff doesn’t it but this is me catching up on years of things and it’s me learning the language of dressing to match my mood and what I want to say about myself too.

I hadn’t really had any idea of just what this all meant when you’re a girl and it’s fascinating too. I mean there’s something about all of this that makes this sense a sort of logic as to why. I think it is my newly wired brain and everything but there’s a lot of stuff my Mom never got to learn from her own childhood and we’re both soaking the femiculture up like we’ve just got out of the male wastelands.

But it’s the lingerie shopping that’s strange and exciting and intimidating. We don’t find much in the regular shops for me so we go to some exclusive places. They have my sizes and more in places like Fredericks.

P.C. is not just home to Hollywood interstellar but it’s home to Vishanti bio-Tech and cyber surgeries and the sex entertainment industry more than anywhere else on new haven so there’s a lot of modified people going around with measurements like mine in some places here.

It was really….uhm…at Starvixens a serious boudoir shop for all things sexy and frilly and lacy. The girl there Stacy…it was the name on her tag measured me and was staring at me a lot with her big blue eyes. And I suppose I was looking at the beautiful girls that worked there the way that I used too and that sort of started the whole thing…Well this Stacy was really friendly and took me by my fingers to the changing room.

“You’re really lucky Terry, you a very beautiful girl.”

“I am?” Gulp.

“Oh gosh yes you have this really exotic look to you and just amazing curves….” Her hands slid up my side in the changing room making me feel all shivery. “And you have beautiful breasts.”

“I do?” Double gulp.

“Oh yes you do may I?”

“May you?”

She dropped my bra on the dressing room floor and she took one of my nipples into my mouth and it made my eyes roll back…hot wet and so…her thumb and fore finger sort of clamped on my other one and she was doing these little motions that was like she was stroking my nipple off or like somehow hand suckling it.

I swear part of my brain was melting but at the same time there was this feeling inside of…off…there was something just not really right about this and the more it went on the more I was feeling it, and it wasn’t what I wanted…I don’t know but it just wasn’t…

“Stacy…Stacy please…stop…”

She stops and she looks at me and she looks sexy but she sort of doesn’t too. It’s just literally uncomfortable like this like I have the bad shivers.

“Stop? You don’t like this…”

“Nn…nn…no…” It took me a bit to find the words to fit everything… “No…god, Stacy you’re beautiful and I’m really, really honoured that you’re hitting on me but…I’m…I’m…not gay…I thought I might even be like Bi or something but this…this is just…”

“Creeping you out?”

“Yes…” I wince. “I’m so sorry…god Stacy I…I’m straight.”

“Hey its okay, you really didn’t know?”

“No…I mean you’re beautiful but you’re just really not…”

“Hey its okay I’m sorry too.”

“Can you still show me the lingerie?”

“And miss a commission?”

It’s all sorts of awkward and stuff but we do get through the sort of fucked up social speed bump that we both had made and are oddly sort of acting like friends. Stacy gets me to buy a lot but she runs it through with her employee discount number.

I smile and look at mom and Sunny as we head to the car. “Well…that was…interesting.”

Sunny looks ay me, raises her eyebrows.

“Stacy came onto me in the changing rooms.”

Mom’s eyes get big. “Terry honey are you a lesbian…can you be a lesbian if you started out as a boy? Sunny how does that work?”

Sunny looks at me. “So like we talked about earlier?”

I nod and sigh. “Yep, I mean I was heading here into the temple of temples for all things girly and slinky and there was bound to be hot girls here and I was really trying to get there in the old me with girls headspace and even with one of the hottest one’s in the store making out with me all I was getting was slowly but surely these signals inside going uh-uh no way.”

“So it’s definitely you and guys then.”

“Looks like.” I hug myself a little then relax. “Well it’s not the end of the world though.”

Mom looks at me. “Terry?”

“Mom, I never really had that much of a real life frame of reference to begin with. I’ve kinda been dealing with this in my head awhile now. If it was a girl or a guy that I was going to be with then it’d still be all new to me. Now at least I know…besides?”

“Besides?”

“Yeah, there’s all that girl stuff that you can teach me about being a girl and liking guys and stuff.”

“Oh…” She brightens up at that. “Oh dear I wonder how your father will take this?”

“I guess I’ll just have to meet a nice boy when I want to bring one home.”

The look on her face sets me and Sunny off giggling. She joins in after a few seconds.

Sunny looks at me. “So what else do you really need?”

“Toys.”

“Toys?”

“Yeah, uhm…I’d kind of want to get something uhm adult like.”

“Oh…”

Then Mom pipes up. “I know a place.”

“Mom!”

“What? We work hard Terry there’s sometimes when you’re…there’s sometimes I…”

She’s blushing but we are all giggling and laughing as we get into the car and sunny follows Mom’s directions.

…………………………………. Ow My Gawd.

I had now idea.

I have never been into a “sensual therapy” shop in my life and while I’ve watched porn online and in mags and there’s lots of ads and stuff…

It’s as fascinating as much as somethings are just Eeew.

And yes, I’m over fifteen and can be in here with my parent or guardian signing a waver and them taking a copy of our Id’s.

Sunny flashed her badge.

That’s so funny I lost it once we were well down the aisles. I mean who uses a police I.D. to get into a sex shop.

Well apparently Sunny Harper does.

It’s an experience and I do get a few things, a small toy that fits like a thimble over my fingers, a slim wand, a jelly one, and a bigger one that’s uhm very realistic.

I was actually kinda sort of attracted to the idea of that one…Mom looked at me with this look. I looked back and sort of gestured at myself… “Mom…I’m a very big girl…”

Okay that set us off giggling again. Oh and one thing I’m Never…ever…buying one of those tongue on a stick things…Eeew!

We actually all bought a few things but Sunny wracked up the most in the book section. And not like the ones I bought like the Kama —sutra but these books on gender and sexuality and these ones about sex but from the guy’s side of things and sex addiction and a lot of stuff on being VG. These aren’t smutty stuff either but really like university level sexual studies and psyche stuff.

Given what I think is going on in her life good call Sunny get some education in these things under your hat.

…………………………………My last stop, our last stop is at The Fortress of Solitude. It’s this mega store for comic geeks and gamers and this is where I spend most of my personal money.

Hey just because I’m a girl now that doesn’t mean I can’t love video games or my comics and I even can buy things I’ve really wanted. But also…I can’t help but to buy a lot of the girl oriented stuff too.

Hey, there’s a lot of great role-models out there y’know for girls as comic book heroines. I’m going to read these all over again or mostly for the first time with a whole new set of eyes. I'm getting stares from the guys here at the place. I don't look like the average gamer...geek girl that comes in here and neither does Sunny. I am shopping and explaining a lot of this stuff to Sunny who does seem interested.

But…oh wow...am I causing that reaction?

There's a whole lots of the guys there that are sporting hardness.
I sort of not look but look?
There is this kind of feeling though like sort of the one I had in my head when I'd watch well...boobs.

Yep...het.

I slip out to the car and get one of my pairs of tight black legging and a mini skirt and stuff it into my purse then go back into the store.

I bought the shirt, it’s Lycra and pretty big but I tuck it in and get my girls adjusted so they’re riding just right and I walk out of the bathroom proudly wearing my Supergirl 2424 year shirt when she was wearing the classic Superboy version of the black top, black mini-skirt, black leggings and flats.

It’s very, very cool to see the stares as I walk out with the great big S on my chest.

"Okay now this is pretty cool."