The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike) Part 1287 by Angharad Copyright © 2011 Angharad All Rights Reserved.

Simon was still grumpy with me because I’d made him walk to get his car. He’d got so plastered the landlord of the pub had sent him home by taxi–apparently he was too drunk to argue–Jenny and I had manhandled him into the house and left him to sleep it off on the sofa in the dining room along with a bucket in case he was sick. He wasn’t, he never is–he’d also forgotten what we’d argued about, so I let it lie.

He awoke without a hangover as well, considering how ill I’d felt, I began to wonder if there was any natural justice in this world, because it certainly didn’t feel like it. Then, as they say, the devil looks after his own, or as Tom would say it, thae de’il looks efter his ain. Perhaps the Scots have their own devil (probably an Englishman holding a nine of diamonds playing card).

The two thugs who’d killed Mr Whitehead were charged with murder and bail was refused–the trial was likely to be held later this year or even early next given the waiting list in the courts. They were still pleading not guilty even though we had video of them doing it on Danny’s phone. It was a cowardly attack by anyone’s standard.

The police would let us know when and if we were needed, it was hoped given the overwhelming evidence against them, that they would change their plea to guilty and save everyone a problem. I didn’t anticipate giving evidence with any sense of enjoyment but I’d do it for Mr Whitehead’s sake, he deserved justice if it was possible to get it for him and those two morons needed putting away for a long time.

In between playing housewife and mother, I tried to help Tom with the survey, although this morning, the builders were back and the what with the noise and smell of paint, I couldn’t cope and went off out with the two babies in the pram. Puddin’ was seated on a baby seat on the end of it, with baby C obviously, in the pram. It was a cold but bright day and Jenny came with me.

“So what’s this house like?” she asked.

“I think it’s a two bedroom, terrace, I’ve only been in it once or twice, but it’s in reasonable condition as I recall.”

“And it isn’t one of yours?”

“Jen, what makes you think I own all these properties?”

“Well you do have several.”

“I have one in Bristol, which was my parent’s house; I have one in Southsea perhaps, but that has to be confirmed.”

“That’s a lovely house.”

“It is nice and I have yet to decide what to do with it.”

“What about the other one at Bristol, down by the river?”

“At Aust? That’s not mine, I’m keeping it in trust for this little madam,” I nodded at Puddin’.”

“Does Stella know?”

“I don’t know, but I’d be obliged if you didn’t tell her just in case.”

“Oh, okay–might I ask why?”

“If you can keep it quiet, I’ll tell you.”

“Oh definitely, cross my heart and all that.”

I shook my head and she smirked. “Des, who was Stella’s late lamented fiancé lived there. For some reason he fancied me and wouldn’t take no for an answer. I was going with Simon, and didn’t want him anyway and eventually he got the message and paired up with Stella.”

“Isn’t history repeating itself with Gareth?”

“What d’you mean?” I asked playing dumb.

“Oh c’mon, Cathy, you know which way is up, the way he looks at you and your occasional glances at him, it’s you he wants, Stella is very much the consolation prize.”

“No he loves Stella, he told me.”

“My mother told me the moon was made of green cheese,” she said and smirked.

“You mean it isn’t?” I gasped trying to deflect her.

“Never mind the nonsense, what about the main event? If Gareth moves in with Stella, are you two going to be able to resist the temptation?”

“Of course we will, you watch far too many soaps–this isn’t Coronation Street or even The Archers you know; this is real life.”

“I think I can differentiate between the two,” she said chuckling.

“Whatever else you might think of me, I happen to actually love Simon very much and don’t intend to threaten that relationship in any way. What I’m suggesting is purely for Stella’s benefit, and I hope is going to be a temporary measure.”

“I think you’re a very lovely and brave lady, but I also think you’re playing with fire.”

“I really can’t think why these two men were attracted to me in the first place. Des probably because I was a challenge, no matter how hard he tried, I always said no. So it then became a test of will power and he lost. But with Stella available, why would they pick me–me over someone who could give them babies?”

“Because you’re very beautiful and vivacious, and intelligent...”

“And used to be a boy,” I added.

“Cathy, you keep saying that, but we both know you were never a boy, you were a girl with a plumbing problem. I refuse to believe you were ever a boy, you just wore boy’s clothes and called yourself something else.”

“I didn’t call myself anything else, I’ve called myself Catherine since I was five years old, in fact before that, I told them to call me that in nursery school–they sent for my mother.”

“Well then, you never were a boy, so stop pretending, you were just a girl delayed from expressing it and puberty by a few years. Have they checked you for Androgen Insensitivity thingy.”

“No, but they did decide my testes hadn’t descended.”

“You had some then?”

“Very small and underdeveloped, and still in my abdomen.”

“That’s dangerous isn’t it?”

“They can become cancerous, but mine were so small they didn’t bother to remove them until I had surgery.”

“See? You were destined to be a girl all along.”

“That was my excuse, but sometimes I think destiny or pure serendipity, I actually chose to become properly female, or as much as one can–which is something most women don’t have a chance to do.”

“Choose? I suppose not, but don’t delude yourself, your ladyship, you were as certain to grow up a woman as I was.”

“Jenny, that is unfounded speculation, I could have soldiered on as Charlie indefinitely.”

“I don’t believe you, you told me yourself that you were already on the programme to do it, taking hormones and things.”

“Yeah, but it took bumping into Stella to make it happen. I owe her a lot for bump starting me.”

“Quite literally, I believe.”

“Indeed, she nearly killed me with the car, I was on my bike.”

“So I heard, and you met Simon and fell in love.”

“Not quite, I did fall for him, or on top of him and emptied a glass of red wine over him.”

“See, even gravity was on your side.”

“Actually, I think it was slightly above and behind me and caused me to fall downwards. If it had been on my side I’d have fallen sideways and missed him.”

She looked at me completely confused, obviously working back through what I’d said which was a load of nonsense. “You’re barking,” she finally declared.

“You noticed–took your time, didn’t you?”

“You’re also one of the funniest women I know, you should have become a comedienne.”

“If you saw my PhD stuff, you’d think I was one.” I held out my hand, “Is that rain?” It felt like drizzle.

“Could be, shall we go home, it’s getting colder.”

“C’mon then, let’s move it a bit shall we?” I suggested and we set off back to the house.