Did one of my evening escapes to try to get my lil ole haid to screw on and went to a Red Robin hamburger joint. Things were busy but I sat with my pin and pad trying to work out a story idea. My food came and I had a bit of Hair of the Dog also.
Finishing up, there was one of those computers on the table to pay with. While I was trying to work out how to badger that thing into responding to me, the waitress came up and said that the people across the way had paid my bill. ??? My first response was, "why would they do that"?
Out on a "Girl's Night Out" last night, eating fried Chicken and Potato slabs. My friend, a GG, said to me that perhaps I did not learn to be female, that perhaps I had always been acting this way, and then decided to clothe it more authentically?
So, my latest story is out, and admittedly I should have split it in two. Perhaps, what I had thought of as my "style", should have had an editor fix it? I don't want my writing to be like it just came out of an English Composition class, so maybe somewhere between? I wanted it to portray speakers that were not English or US folk.
It is obvious that my High School English teacher would be having a fit.
Or can it be that the readership just did not want normal, nonviolent Middle Easterners?
I am ready to get rid of a computer whose HD is in the imminent failure mode but still sorta works. It seems that MS Word no longer allows you to straight up delete files. What should I do before I get rid of it? I'll likely give it to someone who wants to attempt to put a new HD in it. I am told that getting at the HD on this machine is nigh on impossible without breaking the display. Its got an INTEL i chip in it, so he wants to save it.
My computer has been giving me fits for about a week, so, since it is largely free, the Microsoft Store, volunteered to look at it for free, and I accepted. It is horrible to move this All in one around, almost out of my ability to do it. On the second day, they say they found that my HD is failing, so I looked into putting a HD in, and found that on my HP Envy, this model has a screen that is glued into place. Subsequent models apparently started using screws to secure it. So, I decided not to change the HD, and also avoided all the formatting and software installation headaches.
I have been thinking about how much I dislike certain weaknesses of MS Word. The last time that I had a word processor that I really liked, it was Word Perfect and had a blue screen with white type. I started to look at the cost, and a version that I might like is around $100. Then I began to wonder what sort of passive aggressive hijinks that Microsoft might get up to in retaliation if I jumped ship?
In the last year, it has become painfully obvious that I can not wear a bra. To do so soon manifests pain in my rib cage like my ribs are broken, and that even with a very loose bra. I've even been fitted with a so called Transgender bra and it does the same thing. I'm a 42 b. Now, I just wear a T shirt under whatever top I'm going to wear and that seems to conceal my nipples enough. Because of my very conservative Christian and Muslim background, I am accustomed to wearing clothes a size too large.
Still slogging away at a very long story, and I want it to be educational, culturally accurate and fun. I am yet uneasy about it, and the major reason is that some of the Characters are Middle Eastern. I do not want to trigger anyone's PTSD and hope that this won't. There is very little violence in it, and it is quickly dealt with. My own PTSD and anxiety issues won't permit it.
After my prediction that I intended to advance the "Hala" "story um Universe", if you will allow me to call it that, I realize that "I've Got A Fine Kettle Of Fish" here and nothing is going to work as I intended.
In my defence, When I wrote the first two Hala episodes, I had no idea that it would rewrite itself into a minor epic, or that is what it thinks it is.
I just finished reviewing Hala's Snow Day, and substantially rewriting Cowgirl Hala. The process added over 1000 words to it. Then, I discovered that I had actually published Cowgirl Hala back in 2016.
I'm up to eight long chapters of the "Hala" story and did not plan to publish it until I was done, but I'm getting really long of tooth and the ideas don't stop. In two of the chapters, some of it really did happen, but I'm not saying what. The events that might trigger PTSD, I've been very mild about, so I hope that everyone stays OK.
I know there are folk on this site from all over the world, and I am happy to know you all.
Recently I watched a great Sci Fi Movie called "Attraction" made in 2017. I think it is Russian, and the CGI and all the stuff was great, in fact outstanding. If you get a chance to see it, you won't regret it.
I'm about as discouraged as I have been in a very long time, and it is arguable that most of what is stressing me is my own damn fault. There are a couple stories on here that are extremely moving to me, spot on regarding the issues that face post op, out T folk. Recently, my own T life has been more pleasant than at first, but these stories cause me to remember the really painful years.
So, saw something in "TG Forum" that interested me and I wanted in on the discussion. I thought that my BCTS username and password would probably work, but no. Then I tried to register but I kept getting "username" already in use, and the same for my email. My email is not reporting a temporary password from them ...
Maybe I didn't really want to get involved with it after all.
Pretty sure that Dementia is setting in on me. Things have been seeming increasingly bizarre lately. I don't know how fast this stuff moves, but if I make less and less sense as time goes on that's probably the reason. Yesterday, my eyes passed the test to keep my Driver's License, and I mentioned to my Doc that I am concerned about my cognition.
I would be very interested to hear what young transgender folk are experiencing in terms of Endocrinology. For the people in my generation and almost as old, some of us experience almost no breast growth, even post SRS. For me, breast growth has been rather generous, and I suspect that is due to variations in genetics ???
I just read a story about a young woman in Austrailia who has persuaded the authorities that only she and her Doctor need to be involved in her life and not the Judge.
I was walking through a Safeway grocery store today, browsing for the ingredients to put in a nice stew. The store is in Clatskanie, Oregon, and I was on the way home from a sanity break at Astoria at the beach. It is a quaint little town along the Columbia River, in the center of Commercial Logging country. I've been living in the city for so long I must look completely like a city girl, like totally.
I was at my little brother's house and we were talking about stuff while he had me trouble shooting his vacuum cleaner. Out of the blue, he stopped talking and looked lost for a minute. Then he said, "My Grandson is Transgendered". He then revealed that he (she) is 5 years old. He told me that the child's mother, my brother's daughter, said that they had been through the Doctor, Shrinks and endless sessions of telling the child that they were not going anywhere until HE put on the right clothes, until it became obvious that this was not just a passing fancy on the child's part.
Those who are my friends at this site, I consider my Sisters. There are Authors at other sites who get so much support and love from other Authors and readers. I have seen this and it makes me sad to not see members here who are just as supportive.
I started coming to this site around 2006, though did not publish until 2007. I was extremely shattered and emotive, but through the support of those at this site and the release of "Telling My Truth" somehow managed to avoid suicide. Many of those old souls that were here no longer are, for what reason I do not know.
The fact is those of us who remain are going to lose this site if we do not pull a finger out. I don't give two shits about any excuses.
Before someone goes into a Feminist rant, please consider the source, and the fact that she has never claimed to be respectable.
I was just reading an article about a female reporter working for an Alabama Newspaper who was apparently spanked by her then boss at the paper, in 1975.
At first, I was very put off by this story because it aroused every single cell of sanctimonious indignation in my body since it was pure unrelenting sex. Yet, somehow I kept coming back to it like a moth to the flame.
NO, Seriously, "You Sit Crazy", really is from a dream I had this morning and I woke up laughing about it! The only other time I woke up laughing was after a lovingly and properly administered spanking, and it took a couple weeks for me to get over it. :)
This is the fastest turn around from inspiration to publishment (is that a word?) I have ever had. Just a little under 5 hours! What a ride !!!
The Title is in Russian Cyrillic, with Chinese and bad English subtitles, so I can't interpret. I hope that there are enough Sci Fi fanatics out there that will have the persistence to work at understanding this movie. Human first contact with aliens will go something like this, I hope, but better perhaps?
In my continuing reading about Sexual Reassignment Surgery and peripheral matters, I've had a rather astonishing revelation. I was reading an article in "theBMJ" , more correctly "The British Medical Journal", where one contributor stated rather matter of factly that the recipients of SRS surgery routinely had their Prostate removed. This statement illustrated rather conclusively that "professionals" functioning outside their area of expertise sometimes have rather profound gaps in their knowledge base to the point that it is laughable to me.
A while back I got in a discussion about SRS on Youtube and a man commented on it. I wound up having an email exchange with him that led to a phone conversation. He was nice enough and said that he is a surgeon that has done the operation. He challenged me on one aspect of my operation. My Surgeon in Bangkok told me that he did the normal penile inversion technique, and attached one of my Vas Deferens tubes to the back end of my neo Vagina to provide Vaginal lubrication. My Neo Vagina is always moist and has the fragrance of Estrogen; sometimes leaving a white stain in my panties.
I do a lot of reading in Anthropology, Astronomy, Psychiatry, Religious History, and other things equally as mind bending.
Really focused on where Homo Sapiens came from and why we are such violent pricks? And, coming from such uber conservative religious stock, life is anything but a "funny funny riddle". This time of year is really awful.
Checks can be made out & sent to:
Joyce Melton
1001 Third St.
Space 80
Calimesa, CA 92320
USA
Note: $6000 is the operating, maintenance and upgrade budget. Amounts received in excess of the $6000 will be applied to long term debt accrued over the last 19 years.
