f you guys don't mind, I wanna talk about dysphoria for a bit.

Now, it's not a subject I tackle often, partially because I'm not sure how to convey the feeling to someone who has never had it, and partially because I'm not an expert on the subject in any sense other than my own experiences.

That said, as I had a really bad day with dysphoria yesterday, it is worth attempting to give some ideas on it.

My dysphoria tends to come in cycles. Not surprising, since everything else in my life seems to come in cycles too.
Sometimes, it's only a mild irritation.

I've reached a sticking point in a story I'm writing, and I could use a second opinion on what I have got and where to take it.

Anybody wanna volunteer?

I had a couple of good moments with Sharon today. She talked about her church possibly being too judgmental, and I'm petty sure she was talking about my situation in particular.

Plus she talked about meeting a trans woman working in a store in the mall, and how nice a person they were.

Despite her using the wrong pronouns, its the most positive steps forward I've seen from her.

I just wanted all my friends and fans here (and everybody else too) to send some encouragement to Jaci. She's been fiddling with a very funny Jaci and Dottie story, but I think she doesn't think she's a good enough writer, or something.

So send her some love, if you please.

Just letting everybody know that someone is posing as me on Facebook and trying to get my friends there to accept a friend request. Please report to Facebook if this happens to you.

Just wanted to apologize to anybody hoping for more Mercy any time soon. Since losing my job I have been fighting a serious depression, as well as a flu, and worrying about Jaci, my mom, and others as well.

So as a result, I haven't been doing much writing.

I'll try and get something going, but no promises on when you'll see more from me.

Well, the hammer fell today. I have lost my job. It came down to me not being able to get down on my hands and knees to clean the bathrooms properly. Sighs ...

My brain is weird.

I had this really bizzare idea come into my head as I slept last night.

A boy who is an amazing car driver is picked to represent Earth in a series of races against some shadow demons. Each race he loses, another part of the Earth belongs to them. But each race he wins, he has another part of his body turn into a girl's

See what I mean when I say my brain is weird ?

I had a dream last night of having the girliest of girl birthdays. Every present was super feminine.

The one that made me happiest was some very feminine outfit, but before I could wear it, water leaked out from under my bed and got it wet.

I was devastated, and then I woke up.

I'm blaming Jaci for this dream ...

I may have gained a reader. I mentioned at work about having a book on Kindle and one of my co-workers looked it up, and i think he's reading it. Be interesting to find out what he thinks of it.

I am very lucky to live in a house with animals.

Like last night, I was having troubles emotionally, and laying in bed and unable to sleep when my brother and sister-in-law's cat came into my room, jumped up on my bed, and basically demanded I pet her. After a while of stroking her soft fur and hearing her purr, I could feel my blood pressure drop and my heart rate slow. When I stopped petting her, the cat sat at the end of my bed facing my door, as if guarding me from any intruders, until I fell asleep.

Like I said, I'm very lucky.

Well, it wasn't a good day. I was very tired all day today, and then this afternoon at work I got the runs.

Spoons ... I need spoons ...

Had a nice service at church today. Not only did we talk about Jesus as a young boy at the temple, but after the service, we had a lecture/discussion on the subject of "repairative therapy" - sometimes called 'conversion therapy" or "pray away the gay".

As it consists of little more than physical or psychological torture to try and "fix" people like me, and does much more harm than good, we are trying to start the process to get the Alberta government declare it illegal for people under 18 at the very least.

Why am I so weak? I read stories of people who went through stuff that makes my life look like a Sunday picnic and I wonder why is it that I feel like I am hanging on by my fingernails? Why can't I be stronger?

I thought I would throw out a challenge to the authors here:

We have a lot of stories about little kids transitioning, some teenagers, and a few who are college age.

But we don't really have a lot of stories about older transitioners

Anybody wanna take a stab at writing a story about someone transitioning at 40, 50, or beyond?