There is a common misconception among the general public that cheerleaders have it easy. I've been a cheerleader now for close to eighteen months and I can safely say without a shadow of a doubt that these eighteen months have been among the hardest months in my life. One would assume being the little sister of the cheerleading captain, I would have it made. If one would have assumed that then one would have assumed wrong. Nepotism has no place here and in fact it's been a curse, I've been pushed harder, I've been trained longer, and forced to practice longer than the other girls to disarm any notions of favoritism that might be shown to me.
Anyway, despite the long hours of practice and the blood, sweat and tears I've spilled, I've bonded with my teammates and we've forged something of a sisterhood together. These girls, many of whom I would consider sisters from another mother have made my once bleak social life more colorful and have dragged me out of my shell if you will. Also becoming a cheerleader, somehow endows one with a strong sense of nobleness oblige. Thus we often find ourselves helping out with fundraisers and such.
One such fundraiser was the ever popular “Pie a Cop” , an annual fundraiser that normally took place a day or two after Thanksgiving. The fundraiser was simple, a handful of brave officers from the Benton Police Department would volunteer to have cream pies, a grand term for aluminum pie tins that had been filled to the brim with thawed whipped toppings. Patrons would pay ten dollars for both a pie and the privilege of pushing that pie into the face of an officer. The money raised from the event would go to helping those families who were not as blessed as others to have a bit of Christmas and help put some presents under their Christmas trees.
The event always took place downtown and was always hosted by “Brewer & Croft Haberdasher Market” the second oldest, family owned and operated store in Benton. The event would take place toward the back of the store. Here several large sheets of plastic tarps would be spread along the floor and hung in the back. To the side a large gray trash barrel. In the center there would be a wooden chair, the brave volunteer would sit in the hair, be carved with a large plastic sheet to keep their clothing from getting ruined from droplets of pies and then the event would be on.
And what part did the cheerleaders play in this. Well the cheerleaders wound walk up and down the sidewalks of main street. Each one one of us would be holding a small aluminum pail that we had decorated with holiday themes. I remember I had painted the words “Joyeux Noel” in the center of mine. And to finish it off, I had painted a bundle of three holly berries at the beginning and ending of the words. What can I say, I'm really not the creative type when it comes to arts and crafts.
Anyway since the cheerleaders would be the one's collecting the money, everything had to be one point. Our make-up had to be perfect, not too light and not too heavy. It had to strike that perfect balance. Our hair also had to be on point. In short everything about us had to be perfect. And Lily and her Co-Captain Joan made sure each of us were shining examples of demure femininity.
The event started early on a Saturday morning. I remember because deer season was just starting up and the whole of Benton was covered in a fine late autumn frost. The rooftops of Benton were in fact covered in frost and the grass kind of made a crunching sound as you walked across it. It was the kind of cold that makes your breath turn to smoke as you breathed out.
I can remember that morning, the cheerleaders were roaming around in pairs of two. Since we were sisters, it seemed only right that Lily and I would be paired up. Lily's best friend Robin was also there passing out cups of hot chocolate, apple cider and coffee to who dropped their loose pocket change into our pails as we made our rounds. After a half hour of walking up and down the sidewalk, Lily decided to go one way and I decided to go another.
Following a hunch I started to drift along. The wind had started to pick up, blowing tiny flakes of snow around my bare legs. Causing a chill to run down my spine. Deciding to seek shelter, I walked into the shop and started to poke around. Once I walked through the front door, I noticed a large crowd had formed toward the back of the shop. The closer I got to the crowd the more the air seemed to buzz with excitement. Being one of the helping cheerleaders, it was easy for me to pick my way through the crowds till I was standing up front. My eyes were quickly drawn toward the policeman sitting in the chair, he was coated with cream, the plastic sheet he was wearing had a coating a good two inches thick. I could tell by the way he was blushing this had to be new to him. Being the center of attention and all.
Smirking a little I walked up to the woman selling the pies. I whispered something in her ear and slipped her a ten dollar bill. She then handed me a thick cream pie. I took the pie into my hand and smiled as I started to walk toward the guy. He smiled a shy smile and I returned the smile with one of my own as I balanced the pie in the palm of my hand. I then took a deep breath and gently pushed the pie right into his face, making sure to move the pie tin so I covered his face and his hair before sliding it back down the back of his head. The pie tin dropped and a deep blush colored my face as I stepped back and nodded at my handiwork. I had never pied anyone before and it was kind of thrilling to do.
Then the chief of police, a short woman with iron gray hair appeared. The crowd fell silent as she looked over them. Her eyes quickly fell on me, as I was still holding the pie tin that had a few ounces of creamy topping in the bottom. I felt a deep blush coloring my cheeks as she eyed me for a few minutes before going on.
“I'm afraid to say that the last volunteer is needed for patrol.” She said in a commanding tone of voice. “But to keep the ball rolling, I was wondering if there might be a volunteer here in the audience who's willing to sit down and finish the last thirty minutes.” She asked as she looked around.
I don't know what came over me, maybe because I spotted Jason Patterson lurking around the crowds and snapping pictures, no doubt for a special edition of the paper. I knew Jason Patterson in passing, he had snapped a few pictures of me. He had snapped a picture of me covered in green and white slime at the end of homecoming a year or so ago. He then had snapped a picture of me covered in orange slime when Heather Ford had surprised me on a Halloween visit. And then again in pink slime when I lost the annual fishing contest that summer. And again when volunteering for our schools dunking booth.
“I'll volunteer.” I said shooting my hand in the air.
All eyes turned toward me, the word itself seemed to take a deep breath. The chief of police blinked and blinked again in surprise. I believe she expected one of the saleswoman to volunteer or one of the basketball players or maybe somebody else.
“Okay.” She said smiling as she looked me up and down. “And what is your name?”
“Jamie Sarah Potter.” I responded without skipping a beat.
“Oh, the school's princess is going to grant us the privilege of throwing pies at her?” She said smirking a little as she watched the current volunteer stand up and remove the pie covered tarp. The tarp was tossed into the gray trash can and he was handed a towel to clean up some of the pie.
“I guess.” I said forcing a laugh. The seat was now open. So I took a deep breath and walked over and eased my bottom down upon the chair. A few of the cheerleaders heard about me volunteering so they walked over and helped place the clear tarp over my head. And so there I sat, covered from the neck down in a big plastic sheet and surrounded by people eager to shove a pie in my face. A deep blush colored my cheeks as I peered toward them.
“Okay guys and gals.” I said, forcing myself to laugh once more. “Here's your once in a lifetime chance to pie a Benton Academy Cheerleader.” I paused as I tried to think of something to follow that statement up. “So, let me have it!”
I did not have to wait long. Only a few minutes before the first person stepped up. A deep blush colored my cheeks, as it was the officer from before. Smiling from one ear to the other he reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. I could see him handing two bills to the woman in charge of the pies. Once the bills were in her hand, she handed off the pie to him.
I took a deep breath and put on a small smile as he walked toward me. Before he smashed that pie in my face I gave him my best doe eyed look. You know that look a naive girl with big, bright blue eyes would give to project an aurora of innocents to hopefully pull upon the heart of the police officer. But all of my efforts were in vain. He gently placed his hand behind my head to support it and to keep me from turning away, and then balancing the pie in the palm of his hand he gently pressed it into my face, the whole of my world went black as I felt the cream being pressed into my face and then smeared into my hair before being allowed to rest on top of my head.
Slowly I opened my eyes. I could feel the cream clinging to my skin and I could smell it. It kind of smelled like sour milk and tasted kind of like buttermilk too. As my warm skin started to melt the cream on my face it dripped down on the tarp. Then much to my surprise I noticed our cheerleading coach was standing in line next with a big cream pie.
She wore a big smile as she slowly started to walk toward me, she was dressed in a pink turtleneck sweater with a matching black pencil skirt and white leggings and black court shoes to round out the look.
“Jamie.” She said as she drew near enough to push the pie into my face. “I just gotta say, you gotta heart of gold girl.” And with that she drew the pie back and pushed the pie into my face, once more I felt the world around me go dark as my face was enveloped in cream. She held the pie tin there for a few minutes and even gave it a little twist to ensure maxima coverage. Then she let the pie tin fall, I felt the thing fall off my face and roll down the sheet covering me before splatting on the floor. Up next was the chief of police. She wore a big smile on her face as she moved toward me as she balanced the pie in the palm of her hand. A nervous series of giggles escaped my lips as I watched the chief of police stand there. I closed my eyes and a heartbeat later I felt the pie being gently smashed onto the top of my head.
“Oh goodness.” I said giggling as I felt the cream working its way down to my roots. “It's going to take ages to wash all that cream from my hair.” I said wanting now to know the state of my hair. I could feel the oils in the cream starting to run down my face and drip down into my ears. A chorus of laughs, giggles and snickers filled the air as the gathered crowd seemed to find my statement a bit funny. I did not see anything funny in it. The sound of their laughter made my cheeks flush an even darker shade of red.
And there my story ends. I mean, yes I did get my picture in the paper, and yes I raised a good bit of money for charity. So all in all it was a good day. You know, nobody really knows what is going to happen when you wake up. Each day a blessing. Sometimes you just got to look a little closer to find those blessings, sometimes there in plain sight other times there hidden.
The End.
