I don’t know exactly when I started loving Paula. Probably it was a slow process. We had been friends since we were toddlers. As the years went on Paula bloomed into a very beautiful girl. We both got scholarships to a very good high school. She was very popular in school. She was a great athlete. She was very competitive. I wasn’t. Not popular, not competitive. not an athlete. Not that I was an outcast or anything like that but I wasn’t exactly one of the IN crowd. Surprisingly Paula kept being my friend. We studied together in the evenings and so on. The problem was that I wanted us to be boyfriend and girlfriend. That was a constant pain that I was too afraid to do something about. As it turned out I was right in thinking that we’d never become boyfriend and girlfriend.

At first it looked promising. At the beginning of Senior year in high school, one evening when studying together I finally gathered enough courage to ask Paula to the homecoming dance. To my surprise and delight she accepted. She even kissed me! Of course, my phone rang at that moment. Unfortunately it was my manager so I couldn’t ignore him. To make matters worse my stage career is something I have carefully hidden from all my friends and anyone in school. Especially anyone in school! I was rather successful but still a rising star so I couldn’t afford to miss any opportunities, so I apologized to Paula and went into another room.

- Hello Jim. What’s the matter?
- Billy, I have great news! I have booked you into a great venue. A great breakthrough!
- All right, what is it?
- You know that snobbish private high school with all the rich kids? Very conservative. Not a place I’d ever thought would want you to perform. And they pay well! And the exposure! You will get famous!
- Don’t tell me you mean Ivy Academy!
- Yes, that’s the one! Great. isn’t it?! They want you to perform at their homecoming dance!
- That’s MY school. La Cucaracha can’t perform there. CANCEL CANCEL!
- Sorry Billy, I’ve already signed the contract, so you just have to take it as a man, or in your case as a drag queen.

As I ended the call I heard a gasp from behind. I turned around and there was Paula looking appalled.

- You are the Cucaracha and you are going to perform at OUR homecoming dance?
- I’m sorry Paula. I didn’t want you to find out like this.
- Billy, we have a big problem! Actually several!
- Sorry Paula. I understand. You are not going to be my date.
-

At that point I was close to tears.

- What are you talking about? I mean, first of all you are going to spend half the evening on stage instead of with me. Second, La Cucaracha is absolutely gorgeous. I’ve seen you on stage several time and no way I’m going to look as fabulous as you. No girl wants her boyfriend to be more gorgeous than herself. However, I’ll do it if you help me get a dress that’s even more fantastic and outrageous than yours. I mean, I do love you but I still have to prove that anything you do I can do better.

At that moment I realized that we’d never be boyfriend and girlfriend but girlyfriend and girlierfriend worked for me.