My bedroom is small, half the size of my old bedroom. Then again the whole house is really small. The house, or cottage I should say has three bedrooms, a master bedroom, my bedroom, and a guest bedroom. All three of those bedrooms are located toward the back of the house, the main bathroom is located in the back of the house too. If you were to leave my bedroom, you would enter into a narrow hallway. There's an old linen closet located at the end of the hallway. My room is across from the master bedroom and beside the guest bedroom.

And across from the guest bedroom is the main bathroom. Further down is another door and a door beside it. The door on the left would lead to the formal dining room. A room we use once thrice a year, once at Thanksgiving, once at Christmas and finally once at Easter. I rarely go into the formal dining room. Nor does Kayla, we both don't like the feel of it and try to avoid it if all possible.

And the door on the right would lead us to the main dining room area that feeds into the kitchen. That the heart and soul of the house. A big large table, big enough to sit at least twelve people around it sits in the middle of the room. A bit further down from the table one would find the stove and fridge. Dishwasher too. And further down one finds our laundry room. Where the washer and dryer were kept.

I always hated the laundry room too. It was always cold, cold in the spring, cold in the summer, cold in the autumn and in winter you could hang meat in there. It smelled too. Thankfully my sister did most of the laundry. And the last room on the list was the living room. The living room was beside the kitchen. If the kitchen was the soul of the household then the living room was the heart. The living room was the second largest room in the house, the kitchen combo dining room being the biggest. It was also the most cozy room in the house.

Here you had a couch that folded out into a bed, a kind of retro television. Hooked up to the television set was an old, but still working Super Nintendo Entertainment System with a fine collection of games to be played on it. The games included Secret of Man, Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past and a few others I can't name off the top of my head. The system had belonged to my father, who had passed before I left the crib. Kayla never talks about him, he passed when she was coming into those stormy teenage years. But all told he was a good man, a loving husband and devoted father. Who I'm told had been around when Kayla came out of the closet would have put his foot down and reeled my mom in.

Anyway like I said our house is quite small, small is good because it takes little effort to clean up and very little effort to keep clean. And so it took around twenty minutes for me to clean my room, and another twenty minutes to scrub the grim and grime from my body. And so dressed in a clean nightgown, and warm bunny slippers I moved toward the kitchen. And the minute I pushed into the kitchen I was hit with the smell of steaming hot dogs.

My sister had this cute little hot dog cooker that was shaped like a dog. It was called Hero and it steamed your hot dogs and made this cute barking sound when hot dogs finished steaming. She loved the thing and loved the cute little barking sounds it made. She also had a few of those robotic therapy dogs too. She brought a few, she liked to cuddle with them, and since she felt bad about not buying me one she brought a tabby cat for me. My sister had issues, deep rooted issues about loss. Having buried grandmother, grandfather, her mother and her father must have left some really deep mental scars. But she is a proud old country girl and she hid her grief by tossing herself head first into rearing me and maintaining the farm.

“Hey kiddo!” Kayla said smiling as she spun around. “Peeked into your room while you were taking a shower. Good work, now tomorrow its going to keep raining. So we might just skip services. I don't think Father Percy would mind.” She paused. “Also I heard your friend Taylor's going to be confirmed in a few weeks, along with Daisy.” She paused again. “Then there's Heather's and I's wedding.”

I blinked and settled down. Leave it to Kayla to know all about somebody's social life. And about the church thing. Kayla and I both attend services at St. Mary's Episcopal church, a historic little wooden church located in the heart of downtown Benton. St. Mary's was what you'll call an “Anglo-Catholic” Episcopal Parish. For example instead of using the Book of Common Pray they used the Anglican Missal, the language of the Missal is quite archaic and is very heavy.

Another example: a crucifix was often placed upon the altar instead of the simple cross. And Fr. Percy said Mass facing the altar instead of facing the congregation. He often skipped the sermon all together too and moved straight into communion.

“You think Daisy's really going to wear a dress confirmation?” I said after musing on the above stated facts for a few moments. “I mean he did wear a gown for that fund raiser?”

Kayla just shrugged her shoulders.

“Maybe? Does it make a difference though.” She paused and looked me dead in the eye. “Would have wanted to wear a dress instead of a suit when you were confirmed into the church when you were twelve?” She asked. It was a pointed question. At twelve I was still wrestling with my emotions and to be honest I still wrestle with them.

“Not sure.. I mean, I would have loved too, because I felt I was more of a girl than a boy. Wearing that woolen suit really took a lot of the magic out of the moment for me. I really wished I could have worn a pretty flowing gown like the rest of the girls.” I then paused. “But what I'm saying is, Daisy might just wear it to get a laugh.”

Kayla blinked.

“Madeline dear.” She said walking over to me. “You're overthinking things a little too much. I see a lot of Daisy in you. So, kind of cut him a little slack okay. Remember he was bullied out of his old school, and the new headmistress gave him six of the best for standing up to those bullies for Cerridwen.”

I nodded my head and was very much aware of his struggles.

“And you point?” I asked, starting to tire of the conversation.

“My point is this, if he wears a gown instead of a suit that is between him and God. Don't worry about that, just love and support him. And you know, make him feel welcome.” Kayla said in a very motherly tone of voice. I'm sure she could sense the brat coming out in me. I was still lost. Taking a moment to reflect, I could see how my words could turn around and twisted.

“Good.” Kayla said, smiling. “He or she, no matter what happens we’ll stand behind him or her and throw our whole weight behind him or her, supporting whatever choice he or she makes.”
“I still need to know if he's going to wear a gown or not!” I said throwing my hands up in the air. A small smile crossed my lips. And before Kayla could say something I added.

“Because if she's going to wear a gown. I want to do her hair and make-up! I also want to take plenty of pictures of her, Cerridwen and Taylor under the big wooden cross they have in the courtyard. I also want to really do her nails!”

I had stunned Kayla into silence. She opened her mouth to speak, then she closed it, only to half open it again. She was speechless I could tell. Then the hot dog steamer in the shape of a dog started to bark. And all Kayla could say was this.

“I'll pass that one to Taylor's moms.” She said defeated. I don't think she was expecting that turn around. “Until then, let's get something to eat, I'm starving.”