I took a deep breath as I peered toward Heather who was reclining in an old fashion chair. I had been invited to appear on the Heather Ford Show on a whim. I mean, I had been a fan of the show for two and a half years. It was the bread and butter of our local PBS station. And I guess it was only a matter of time before I was invited on, I mean, not to blow my own whistle, but I was something of a local celebrity in Benton.
I mean I was a member of the varsity cheerleading team, I was also a published author, my collection of ghost stories and urban legends had been quite popular. I mean I had sold like six hundred copies, and for a regional piece that was pretty big. I was also something of a budding ghost hunter. But still to be invited on to Heather's House Party was pretty big. Like a major career breakthrough for me.
“So.” Heather said smiling as she peered toward me. “Madeline, Madeline, Madeline,” She said chanting my name. “Where do we start with you.” She leaning back into her chair. “Because really I'm quite impressed with you. Let's see for starters you're a Junior and you attend Benton Agricultural High School. You're also on the Varsity Cheerleader Squad. You're a published author, and so much more.”
I felt my cheeks bloom with color as I nodded my head.
“So.” Heather said smiling. “Let's start with your book. I've read it. And while its really not my type. I'm more of a romance type of girl. But, I can tell you poured your heart and soul into it. So, if you would, you would mind giving me a little insight into the whole creative process. What drove you to collect all those stories.” Asked Heather as she leaned back into her chair.
“Well, my friends and I kind of have this group. Like every Saturday night, We would gather in the woods behind my house. We have a few old chairs, a few old couches and we've formed them in something of a circle around this fire pit. And we kind of gather there to tell ghost stories. Its kind of dorky I know, but it's free and it really helps us bond.”
A small smile played upon Heather's face as she nodded her head along with my rambling words. She nodded her though, a sign she wanted me to continue. I was pretty nervous being on television and all. But there was something about Heather that put me at ease.
“Anyway, one day I decided to collect all the stories and write them down. At first I just wrote them down for my own personal enjoyment. Then my best friend, Jamie Sarah Potter suggested that I try to publish them. And So I started to collect them. As my collection grew well so did the idea of publishing them grew. So once I collected like fifteen or so stories, I decided to take them down to a local publishing company in my hometown of Benton. And we'll publish them.”
Heather nodded.
“I see,” Heather smiled. “Tell me about school next. You're in your junior year of high school now and you're going to be a senior next year. Do you have post graduation plans? Do you plan on attending university or college? If so which ones?” She said leaning back and giving me one of her most disarming smiles.
“Yes.” I said blushing. “I plan on attending Holmes Community College in Goodman. I scored high enough on the ACT exam to attend any regional university though. I just want something that is a little closer to home. My sister and my mother both attend Holmes.” I added.
“As did I.” Heather added. “It's a wonderful school. So what's your goal at Holmes?” She quickly added.
“I'm kind of wanting to get an AA in accounting. My sister runs a farm and I'm working part time as a waitress at a local maid cafe. And I figured I could help my sister keep her books and maybe help the cafe keep their books.” I said blushing. “The cafe is kind of a family deal. My two mentors, Lily Potter and Robin Peers started it about two and a half years ago.”
Heather gently nodded her head.
“I see, would that cafe in question be the anime theme one located in the heart of historic downtown Benton. The one were all the staff wear those adorable maid theme outfits. I think the name is Sweet Magnolia or something like that. I know their pies and cakes are wonderful. And they make the best sweet rolls, turnovers around.” Heather added with a smile. “And don't forget their seasonal treats too.”
“Yep!” I chirped. “My best friend forever, Jamie Sarah Potter is one of the bakers too and she bakes the best pies and fixes the best custards too.” I started to shift my weight around.
“We'll.” Heather said, smiling a little. “I think it's time we move on to the main event of tonight's episode. As you know, here on Heather's House Party we enjoy giving our guests a chance to win a prize or two. Sometimes it's as simple as a trivia quiz. And sometimes we have an challenge for them to complete.” She paused and leaned back into her chair. “Now, since you work at a maid cafe, we decided to give you a little challenge.” And with that she stood up and smoothed out her skirt.
“If you would, would you follow me.” Heather said as she motioned with her hands for me to stand up and follow her. Following her lead I stood up and was guided from one center of the set to the far left. I quickly noticed that the gunge tank had been tucked into a small corner of the room
The gunge tank was a stable feature of Heather's House Party, The tank was something of a square box that was partially enclosed with Plexiglas. In the center of the box there sat a wooden chair above the chair was a spout that was connected to a reservoir that contained around ten gallons of creamy, gunge that reminded me of melted French Vanilla ice cream.
“Now.” Heather said smiling. “Since you're a part time waitress at a maid theme cafe. I thought a little test of you're waitress skills would be in order.” She said nodding her head. “In a few seconds, I'm going to have one of my stagehands take back to the back to get changed into an adorable french maid costume.” She added, she then paused as she strolled over to a table that held a serving set.
“Then I'm going to have you serve me some hot chocolate or tea. Your choice, I take my tea with a spoon full of honey and three cubes of sugar and a spot of cream mind you.” She paused. “And I'm sure being the clever girl you are, you will do just fine. But spill the tea or even worse get it on me! And I'm afraid a trip to our world famous gunge tank awaits you.”
I nodded my head in understanding.
“Very well.” Heather said smiling sweetly toward me. “If you would then, please follow Tiffany to one of the guest changing rooms. Once you've changed, you'll rejoin me on stage and we can have a little spot of fun.” She said with a wink.
I blinked and soon I felt a sudden tap on my shoulder. I quickly turned around and noticed a girl with long, wavy blonde hair standing behind me. She was dressed in a solid black dress that reached down to her knees, black stocking and low heel shoes completed her look. A silver name badge pinned to the front of her dress read ' Tiffany' and below that was 'Head Stagehand'. The girl made a notion with her head to follow behind her and so I did. A few minutes later, I found myself being guided back to the rear area of the stage.
“Okay Ms. Brewer.” Tiffany said to me. “Heather will be conducting a fifteen minute interview with somebody. Meaning you have just fifteen minutes to get dressed, style your hair. We are on a tight schedule here. So I must stress to you that even the slightest delay can throw us off. The remaining forty five minutes or so the show has been allotted to the end game we always play.” Tiffany explained as she pushed open the door to the common changing room.
“You should find everything you need in here. Remember fifteen minutes.” She said, nodding her head as spun upon her heel and marched away. No doubt she had other, bigger fish to fry.
My eyes followed the retreat of the woman. There was something demanding and commanding about her. Anyway, I had only fifteen minutes and that left very little time to pout and sulk. So gathering my thoughts I entered the dressing room. I quickly closed and locked the door. Once the door was locked, I walked a little further into the room and their sitting upon the table was a simple, cardboard box. Written on top of the box in big black letters were the following words. 'Madeline D. Brewer – Maid Costume.'
I felt a sudden blush color my cheeks as I walked over and lifted the lid of the box. My blush only deepened as I noticed that folded neatly in the box was the classic french maid uniform. You know the kind with a short black dress, white frilly apron, black fishnet stocking and of course a new pair of high heel shoes. These were jet black and made with real leather and had a heel that was a good inch taller than the ones I had worn before. A sudden knocking on the door brought me back to reality.
“Ten minutes Ms. Brewer.” The voice bellowed, no doubt it was Tiffany, trying to keep up with the demanding time table.
I closed my eyes and quickly slipped on the outfit. I'm thankful the outfit was simple, but as I peered into the provided mirror I once more felt my cheeks bloom with color. I looked stunning. The dress hugged my slender, willow frame. The attached petticoat gave the bottom of the dress a nice flare and made my bottom look bigger than it was. The black fishnet stocking made me feel mischievous and the heels made me feel sexy.
“Wow I look good!” I said to myself as I spun around as I faced the mirror. Then there came a loud tapping upon the door. Quickly I turned around and faced the door a few seconds later Tiffany came rushing in, she looked quite flustered.
“You are four minutes late Ms. Brewer.” She said in a scolding tone of voice. “I see you are dressed, but please be mindful, we have a limited amount of time. In fact we can't afford another minute's delay, So if you would, would you please follow me.” She said once more spinning upon her heel. She then marched off. The clicking of her heels echoed across the chamber.
For a few seconds, I thought about reaching over and picking up the pitcher of ice water that rested in the center of the table. The mental picture of me pouring the pitcher of freezing cold water down over her head made me smile. You know something to calm her down. But I pushed that mental image from my head and followed meekly behind her. And a few minutes later I returned, Heather was just finishing up an interview with another well known regional writer.
“Well that's all the time we have today. I would like to thank Melody for coming onto the show.” She called out. Melody nodded her head and offered a small wave. “I hope she'll come back on again. As we still need to properly introduce her to the gunge tank.” She added with a snicker and Melody turned beat red.
“Anyway, now lets welcome back Madeline Diana Brewer! Who I trust has now changed into the provided costume. As of right now she is four minutes late. Really now, good help is such a hassle to find these days.” She said in a joking tone of voice. The audience seemed to sense she was joking around because a roar of laughter filled the chamber. Unlike most sketch shows, the Heather Ford House Party did not pay its live studio audience. Instead people were often given free tickets to the shows. The understanding however was that by accepting the free tickets the person was putting themselves out there if you will. Accepting the free tickets puts one at risk of being called on stage to play a game or even get gunged! The chances of that occurring thought were slim to non though. But it was a gamble.
“And my, my.” Heather said smiling. “You look wonderful!”
“Thanks.” I said, pushing a few loose strains of my brunette hair out of my face and behind my ear.
“Tell me darling, do you have a boyfriend?” She said getting up out of her chair and walking over to a wooden table that had a silver serving set resting upon the highly polished surface.
“Yes, I'm dating.. A local boy, who's about to get his Eagle next week.. his name is Matthew Sidney Johnston.” I paused. “And he's the sweetest boy you would ever meet.” I quickly added.
“I'm sure he's a lucky boy, and I'm sure he would love to see you get gunged too, anyway would you like to know what you're playing for?” Asked Heather as she settled down into chair.
I nodded my head.
“If you can pass my little test. I'll reward you with a bundle of gift certificates worth six hundred dollars. You can use these gift certificates at the many fine boutiques located within the largest enclosed mall in Mississippi, North Park.” She said with a grin. “Anyway, as soon as I ring this bell.” She reached down and picked up a small silver bell. “You may start. Do you understand?”
I nodded my head. And with that Heather rang the small silver bell.
Now I have a mischievous streak a mile and a half along. And so when Heather came to me to cue to start I already had a plan to cause trouble brewing in my head. I felt Heather had been something of a brat these last few episodes, she had gunged my friend Jamie twice now and I wanted a little playful revenge. So putting my best smile I walked over to the tray and bent down and picked it up. The tray despite being laden with a silver serving set was not that heavy. I am after all a farm girl, and a cheerleader to boot!
And so putting on a big smile I started to walk toward the table where Heather had seated herself. It had taken only a second for me to make up my mind. I was going to cause Bedlam on this show. And so with that in mind, I picked up the tray and started to ease my way toward Heather. A wicked little smile crossed my face as I eased the tray down. Heather caught the last fleeting glimpse of that evil smirk and for a minute I felt I could almost feel herself starting to sweat drop.
“First.” I said smirking a little as I went for the silver bowl that held a good amount of cream. “I'm going to add a little cream. You said you like plenty of cream with your tea right?” I said winking as I picked the bowl up and slowly titled it up. The thick, cream poured out and spilled right down the front of Heather's smart looking blouse and pooled at the bottom of her skirt.
“Oh my!” Cried Heather as she looked down at the mess. “This will never come out!” She said blushing as she stood up.
“Oh don't worry.” I said picking up another bowl this one held some half an' half. I hovered the bowl above her head and smiled. “We just need to add a little half and' half.” I added with a wink as I dumped the bowl all over Heather's head, coating her long golden locks of hair with the sticky creamy mixture. I could hear a loud roar of approval rising from the voices of the gathered audience.
A deep blush formed upon Heather's face as she stood there and then she broke into a fit of giggles. No doubt the fact was dawning on her, that millions of people had just seen her get messy. At least all of Mississippi had seen her, and maybe parts of neighboring Louisiana, Arkansas, Tennessee and last but not least Alabama. Millions and millions of people.
“Okay.” Heather said blushing as she walked over and took me by the arm. She was starting to giggle a little. “It seems we have a little trickster here at the House Party.” She said, smirking as she guided me toward the tank. She opened the door and motioned for me to step in.
Blushing a little I stepped into the tank, I quickly spun around and smoothed out my skirt as I eased my bottom down upon the wooden chair. A minute later Heather closed the door and locked me in. She then moved far to the side.
“Normally.” She said as she turned to face the audience. “Normally I'll stand close to the tank to pull the cord and release the slime. But since we have a little trickster here.” She narrowed her eyes at me. “I decided to stay as far away as possible and flip the switch with a controller.” With that being said she reached over and picked up a small controller from the table. “Madeline, you've been a naughty girl today. But before I push this button and release all that gunge down upon your head. I want to ask you something.” She said as she placed her thumb over the bright red button.
“What?” I said as I looked up and noticed tiny drops of gunge dripping down from the top of the tank down upon my forehead. A deep blush colored my face, I had only gotten gunged once before and that was two years ago for some dump charity fundraiser at school. The gunge then had been a mixture of applesauce, vanilla pudding and green food coloring. I remember the slimming being cold, sticky and I smelled like apples for a week afterwards. I kind of wondered for a moment what the slime hovering above my head was made off and what I'll smell like after it went through coating every inch of me. I also oddly enough wanted to know how it would feel.
“Do you have any last words darling?” Heather said, smiling softly.
“No, not really.” I said looking up with a little smile. “But since you asked, why don't you and I switch places?” I said, smirking a little.
Heather blinked and blinked again. And then smirking she pressed the button a loud klaxon sounded and a few seconds later a massive waterfall of gunge started to pour down on me. I remember tensing up the moment before the gunge came pouring down. Then I felt it, the effects of the cold slime splashing down on my brunette hair, the gunge then slipped down my back and coated my back, then my front.
The gunge was ice cold and caused me to shiver. It felt thick too, thick and oily, the texture reminded me of melted ice cream. It pooled around my skirt, coated my shoulders, my sides, and my stockings. I shivered again and even jumped a little, the flood seemed never ending. Then finally it stopped. After what seemed like forever, but must have been only a handful of seconds the flow of the gunged stopped and for once I was allowed to catch my breath.
There is not a word that is powerful enough in the English tongue to tell you guys how I felt sitting there, coated from the top of my head down to the bottom of my toes in that sticky mixture. A deep blush though formed on my face as I watched the goop that had pooled on my skirt flow down into the bottom of the tank.
“Wow.” Heather said, smirking. “That was pretty good gunging. Tell me Madeline, did you enjoy that?” She asked in a teasing tone of voice.
“Yes.” I said blushing, I did kind of enjoy that.
“Oh! Wonderful and I think you'll be happy to know that even though you lost the game. I'm still going to reward you the six hundred dollars in gift cards. And I will donate from my own pocket one thousand dollars to your future education.” she paused. “And for those of you who might be aware. I'm also married to Madeline's older sister, Kayla Brewer. And so with this in mind, today is the last episode of the 'The Heather Ford's House Party' but don't worry for it soon to be relaunched as the 'The Heather Brewer House Party'.” She said smiling.
I blinked as my blush deepened.
