dorothycolleen's blog

moving is such a stress

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If you ever look at a list of the most stressful things that can happen to you, moving is pretty high on the list.

And I should know, having moved a large number of times.

but stressful or not, I am moving again.

The only good thing is the place we are going to looks pretty darn good.

I would ask for hugs, but then I gotta pack them . . .

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Jasper is threatened by fire

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If strangers know anything about Alberta, it's probably the resort towns of Jasper and Banff.

Well, right now, Jasper has been evacuated, and fires have reached the outer reaches of the town.

We are safe from the fires here in Edmonton, but the smoke is making it hard to breathe.

hugs and prayers appreciated.

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False Memories

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Okay so last week, I had to get some cavities filled, and is always the case, they had to sedate me.

Once it was over, one of the nurses helped me get to our car, and Mom drove me home.

Except . . .

I can place myself in the driver's seat for the drive home, even though that is impossible.

And so I find myself shaken, wondering what other memories I have are fake, especially the memories I have recovered of the abuse I suffered as a child, as one of the few things I am sure of is my abuser used sedation on me.

hugs appreciated.

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a good day

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So yesterday, mom and I got laundry and groceries done, and then we took Sam to a bookstore.

Unlike most places, they were allowing dogs to come in, probably because of the heat, so I was in heaven meeting several pups and giving them some petting.

Which made me one happy Dottie!

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minor issues with the new computer

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I have been trying to set up my new computer, and for the most part I am happy with it, but I do have some minor issues I have not been able to fix. its mostly the keyboard, as somehow when I try the key for the apostrophe and the quotation marks, I get this instead: è È.

I have tried to reconfigure the keyboard, but so far, no luck.

It is not a major thing, I can live without them, but it is kind of annoying, and it has slowed my writing.

Ah, well,

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my dreams would make a blockbuster film

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I swear, if you could somehow film my dreams, you would have a blockbuster. Like last night, I dreamed I was a police woman in a small town with a sexist boss when something made people in the town go crazy and I had to keep people from hurting each other.

See what I mean

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facing hard truths

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I've been thinking a lot about my relationship with my brother.

I think I can finally admit I've been jealous of him pretty much my whole life.

As a kid, I wanted to be able to catch up to him in school, to be competitive with him at ping pong, or play the guitar like he did.

And even when we became adults I always felt like I was not as good as him. He managed to overcome his issues and succeed at college, and get a good job as a programmer, while I failed three times to get a higher education and barely managed to get a certificate as a Nurse's Aide.

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more adventures with dentures

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so unfortunately, I have had a setback with my dentures.

I started having pain, but I'd promised my aunt I'd drive her to her doctors, and so went without them,

When I got home, I discovered the reason why - I have a couple of bones making their way from under the surface of my gums.

I will have to go see the dentist, and see if they can do anything, and because of the long weekend, I'll be making the call on my birthday.

Sighs, hugs please?

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grad party hijinks

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yesterday, we went to a graduation party for my daughter's friend Jason.

And while there, I was introduced to a 4 year old girl who apparently decided I needed a hat to complete my look, and gave me hers.

We traded the hat back and forth, and then she upped the ante by giving me not only the hat but a small suitcase filled with her toys.

The whole thing almost made up for being called "Todd" the whole night.

Almost.

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2 encouraging dreams

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I had 2 rather encouraging dreams last night.

In the first one, I was in a contest where I had to climb up what looked like a life-size pinball machine.

In the second one, I was back in university and realized I had forgotten to write down the location of one class, so I went to the office to get it.

So what was encouraging?

In the first time, I wasn't afraid to take a breath and plan each step I took.

In the second I wasn't afraid or ashamed of asking for help when I needed it.

and that's encouraging.

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I got a Third ! entry for the fresh start contest!

well, believe it or not, I managed to bang out a third entry in the "Fresh Start" contest!

you can read it here: https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/102626/star-tower

please kudo and comment if you like it!

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some good news to share

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Well, I have some good news to share.

First, I got the results of the CT scan done on my brain back, and it showed no signs of damage or anything. While that is good, it means we still don't know why I have word drop and brain farts.

Second, I am now on stage 2 of dealing with my dentures, which means I can now have solid (if soft) foods.

Step by step, I do what I can, and its great to make progress.

huggles for everybody

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"I'm the fuse, she's the bomb"

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I have to share my latest dream, while I still remember it.

In the dream, I was on a quest, and had gathered a group of people to be part of it.

Once the group was assembled, I told them that one of them, a young woman, had a connection to me and to what was going to happen

I told them, "I'm the fuse. She's the bomb."

I didn't seem upset about this. In fact I told the girl, "Come on, lets go boom"

Then I told them we had to get to a certain location up on top of a hill on the outskirts of the city, and we began to travel.

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adventures with dentures

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So on Thursday, I got all my top teeth removed, and my dentures installed.

The reason they put the dentures in right away is they use them as kind of a bandage, to protect the area from infection, and keep the shape of my mouth the same as it heals

So the last couple days have been kinda less than fun, but I'm slowly getting better,

Anyway, hugs still appreciated.

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swimming in tar

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So for the last couple of days, I've been dealing a specific symptom of my depression - a lack of spoons.

I have felt like I was swimming in tar exhausted just getting the minimum done.

I'm starting to come out of it, but huggles appreciated.

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its my 15th anniversary of being here!

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So according to my account, I have been a member here for "14 years, 12 months" which means if my math is correct, its my 15th anniversary.

Thank you to everyone who has commented on any of my blogs and stories, and a special thanks to Erin and her elves for keeping this place going.

Best group of crazies I've ever met!

Huggles for everybody!

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my celling is falling down

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so a couple of days ago, we noticed a crack in the ceiling in our bathroom, that had water leaking out of it.

we called the building maintenance person, and after taking a look he said he'd need to get into the suite above us, and no one there was home, so he planned to try again today.

In the meantime, the crack has turned into a piece of the ceiling barely hanging on by one corner, and the water situation is worse.

Hopefully this get fixed before we have to evacuate the apartment.

hugs appreciated.

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going to be a very busy week next week

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So next week, I'm going to be super busy being the taxi for my aunt, as well as having another attempt at getting a mold for my new dentures.

It means I'm going to have to make sure I squeeze in down time for myself whenever I can, so I may not be around much.

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so yesterday was mostly a flop

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So yesterday I went to the denturist to get a mold for my dentures, and it was mostly a flop.

My gag reflex just refused to cooperate long enough for them to get a good impression on my top teeth, so I am going to have to go back and try again a week from Thursday.

Sighs, I need huggles, anybody got some to spare?

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I am going to need dentures

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so my dentist had to give me the bad news - I am going to need dentures, as my teeth are causing too many issues.

I cant help feeling like a failure. If I could have overcome my tendency to skip on my self care, its possible I could have avoided this.

ah, well.

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had an odd conversation with Sharon

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Well, I just had an odd conversation with Sharon.

She told me that while she cares for me, and always found being with me "fun", she loved me and still loves me like a buddy or a brother, and was never deeply in love with me. She then apologized for not being able to feel deeply in love with me.

I'm not sure what to do with this. I forgave her, but beyond that, I'm kind of stumped.

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Piers Morgan and friends hate on Dylan Mulvaney.

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I hate posting twice in one day, but I watched about 3 minutes of Piers Morgan hosting a "debate" on Dylan Mulvaney. the amount of just utter hatred towards trans people, the complete lack of respect or even treating someone like a human being was just awful to watch. It sucks to be a part of a tiny minority that has attracted the attention (and hate) of people.

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