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Chapter 18

Thursday morning moves so fast for me and by lunch it’s dad to the rescue again as I’m getting calls from my online friends and family. Some of them are arriving tonight even and god there’s so much to do.

I guess first thing’s first, and I slide up to Taylor just as he’s finishing the last cinnamon roll in the place. I kiss him and lick the icing and cinnamon and sugar off his lips. “We’re getting busier Tay we should hire someone else.”

“We could, any ideas?”

“Billy’s girlfriend Dallas.”

“Okay give her a call, we are going to need her here with all the wedding stuff going on and everything.”

“Yeah, we can’t keep calling in my dad.”

“Sure we can. He’s been interested in the place and he might partner in along with your Gramps.”

“Really?”

“Yeah we’ve been tossing the idea of expanding the place.”

“Adding onto it?”

“No not really, the diner thing works but there’s empty space out back that we’re not using. The place was a bread company, not even a full service bakery when my Uncle bought it. He just built everything around the ovens. We’re thinking of replacing some gear then setting up the storage rooms better then move the kitchen about ten feet back.”

I look over the area, think about out back. “That’ll give us some room about another forty square feet out there any ideas as to what to do with it?”

“I was thinking more booths; a four foot high wall about twenty feet long with four of these small booths with the two seater benches would be great.”

I nod I can see where he’s going with this. “Moving the kitchen back twelve feet would be better Taylor just so we can keep it so everyone can move easily around.”

“Yeah, if we can do that we’d be perfect.”

“Not quite.”

“Okay? What would you do different?”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, you’re going to be my wife, this’ll be your business too.”

“The steps for the take out sandwich window.”

“Yeah?”

“We need to be turning them into a patio deck, so the guys can eat out there when it’s hot outside and we can put in another door too.”

“We going to serve outside?”

“Not to start with but if it was busy enough; yeah.”

“What else?”

“I’d make it a covered patio, so the place won’t be useless in the rain.”

“Anything else?”

“Well I’d like to see us have a smoker thing set up for us out back like maybe built onto the building or something so we can do a lot of our own product.”

“Okay, you read my mind with that one. I’ve always wanted a smoker or smokehouse and your gramps knows a lot about it too.”

“He does?”

“He’s got one back home on PEI; apparently he does it as a hobby.”

“That’s cool maybe he could teach me.”

“I’m hoping he can teach both of us and our kids.”

I drop the plate I was drying off. Smash!

“Kids?”

“Yeah, our kids.”

“I…But…I’m…”

“There’s kids out there like I was Jen. Kids out there in the adoptive and foster care systems that might need parents. Biology isn’t all that important right.”

“Yeah…I mean look at Natalie right Tay?”

I nod as I‘m talking, I’m smiling now a little even as the idea takes root in my brain, like I’m still daydreaming….Me…a mom, a mum.

I love kids, even as Jaime I loved kids. Children were something I could care about. Even then they were one of the few things that made me feel. I’m swimming in my sea of woman/girl thoughts as I’m being filled up with this hormonal supercharged feeling…I’m feeling my maternal side for my very first time as a woman. It's wonderful... I’m feeling it so strong right now I ache. It's right then I blissfully realize even if I can’t birth them I want kids, I want my own children. I look over to where Taylor is cleaning up the ceramic from the plate. He knows me. He loves me so much, he knows me that much that he’s thought about us being parents. Which means he really wants to live. Not just wants to but he's planning on it. God just watching him do that, cleaning up the plate. I can see him doing it for one of our kids. He’ll make such a great dad.

God…You there? Thank you for him. Thank you for showing me another way that I can see him. i look at my Taylor and I see love. For me, Taylor is love come to life.

I’m falling in love with Taylor all over again. How can you not when someone knows your heart and soul that much. I go over to him and was going to pull him up into a kiss. Instead he pushes his face into my stomach, nuzzles my navel. Kisses my stomach...I feel that make my heart glow. You know that would’ve depressed me not that long ago. Not anymore, I know and can take this for exactly what it is. This incredibly sweet gesture of his love for me.

“Taylor…I really need you. Take me away and make love to me.” I whisper it and almost sing it to him. He plants his face into my stomach and smells me. “Johnny? I need you guys to take over.” He then picks me up around my waist and carries me away upstairs to our bedroom where we make long slow lovemaking in the middle of the afternoon. With the sunshine spilling in over my body through the windows as we kiss and touch with our favorite love songs playing in the background. Taylor does surprise me not just by the fact that he’s good with touching me "there". But he takes me into his mouth. I should freak out, I should hate it and feel ashamed but after he pulls a climax from me that I arched so badly I think I might have cracked my spine he says. “I love you Jenna, every part of you, in everyway. I just couldn’t wait until after your op. I’ve been down here with every other girl that I’ve been with. I want to do this for you after your op too. But you’re not just like everyone of them Jen…you’re better; because you love me…and that’s all that will ever matter to me. It’s never been about what you are, it never will be.” He kisses my pelvis, then my abs “You’re my Jenna.” Then on my lips. “My sweet Jenna.” We share a passionate kiss. He’s touching me all over with his finger tips. He breathes “I love you into my ear.” I bite nibble on his ear and whisper to him. “I know.”

I cry because I’m happy, I’m loved and cherished and it feels like there’s been another wall inside that’s been torn down.

Our lovemaking is incredible and slow and intense. There’s one point that just took it somewhere wonderful. Taylor turned up our songs and got my cocoa butter lotion. He slid back inside of me and he warmed the lotion while massaging me his hands caressing me as he moved inside and out of me up and down my back. It lasted…amazingly long…There’s his hands stroking me "there" making me cry out. His lotioned hands on my breasts massaging me off to the second breast induced orgasm of my life. But it’s the massage and the regular sex that took me there. I didn’t even get “there” in my favorite part. It was him making such slow and beautiful love to me and Sarah McLaughlin singing over our stereo with Taylor singing with her as he was making love to me with his voice.

“Your love is better than ice cream.”

“Better than everything else that I’ve tried.”

“And you’re your love is better than ice cream.”

“Everyone here knows how to fight.”

“And it’s a long way down.”

“A long way down.”

“A long way down to the place.”

“Where we started from.”

“Your love is better than chocolate.”

“Better than anything else that I’ve tried.”

“Oh love is better than chocolate.”

“Everyone here knows how to cry…”

“It’s a long way down.”

“It’s a long way down.”

“It’s a long way down to the place.”

“Where we started from…”

It’s one of my favorite songs in the whole world but now…Taylor sang along with it not losing his breath, or the rhythm of his hands and himself moving in and out of me. He was taking me to this so soulful place like lovemaking was prayer…He sounds a lot like Jon Bon Jovi when he sings to me.

I just lived in this pure moment my head cradled into my arms and resting on my pillow bathed in his love and the sunshine. I cried, but these were tears of joy and love straight from my soul.

My name is Jenna Powers and I have no doubt of who I am now. And you know. I can’t wait to be Mrs. Jenna Winters.

We sleep for awhile and then shower together. Kissing and touching and we brush our teeth and it’s the little things. Stupidly good things like him putting lotion on me and powdering my back, me kissing him and smelling his skin and putting on his deodorant under his arms. He wears Old Spice, which I love and yeah, like I said these are stupid little things right? Who loves stuff like this, this much?

I do. I really, really do.

All those little things we do, that people do in their relationships. I really believe…

These are the unspoken words in the love songs of our lives.

We manage to get downstairs with just about and hour before the supper rush comes in. It’s the usual fare and I had just enough time to throw a couple of batches of my cinnamon rolls and I try a new one for in house.

Apple cinnamon pizza.

It’s a pizza skin that I bake off the once it’s done I brush it with butter then toss the whole thing in the spice mix like a doughnut then I top it with apple pie filling with those Kraft caramel squares. The filling bakes down into like a jam, the caramels melt and I just drizzle the icing over it after it’s been sliced.

As soon as the first one came out I couldn’t keep up with the orders. From 5:40 to 7:15 or so PM I made 23 of the things. Yeah I had help but still it’s like close to one every six minutes. Dad even took a bunch afterwards with him to the hospital as a treat.

I write it and a few other ideas down into my book as we close things down and clean up. Taylor’s really affectionate while we do it and he reads a few of the things I've thought up. He also looks through the few things I’ve thought of and drawn out that aren't food including the uniform ideas. He’s holding me kissing and nuzzling my neck and stuff. “I like the jersey and the work belt idea Jen, we can do like T-shirts for the staff in the summer too.”

“You really like them?”

“Yeah it’ll give us a nice touch of we’re serious but be really relaxed at the same time.”

“That’s what I was thinking.”

“I’m going to go and do up the books and stuff, Holly and Nin are going to do laundry so once the pays are done. How’s us going out on a date sound?”

“It sounds great Tay, where?”

“Movies, then maybe we can go out dancing?”

“Dancing! I’d like that I haven’t…”

“What’s wrong? You sounded excited but then?”

“I haven’t gone out to dance since I was just becoming me and was hanging out with Ingrid.”

“So…you don’t want to go?”

“Hell yes I want to go, I’m more me than I’ve ever been Tay, I’m not going to let what Ingrid did to run my life. I know I’m a pretty decent person and if she wanted to throw away our friendship… (Sniffle.)…I still want to go.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, Besides I don’t want to miss out on a chance to have another date with you.”

“Mmmn, good.” He leans down and kisses me long and sweet on the lips.

It doesn’t take me too long before I realize that we’ve got four of my friends arriving in from a Midwestern flight tonight at around midnight. Its eight now, well twenty five after.

I slip up ti the office. “Taylor?”

“Hmm?” he’s got his head behind the computer and the books.

“Alice, Jenny, Hope and Kendal should be arriving tonight around midnight. Can we take a rain check on the dancing?”

“You still want to go out and see the movie?”

“Yeah but could we swing by the airport afterwards to meet them?”

“Yeah.” He closed the books and saves his stuff. “You take these to the girls and if we hurry we can get into a nine o’clock show and be out with lots of time to drive out to the airport to get them all set up.”

I go and take the envelopes and mine and give then to the girls. Mine’s a bit light but I haven’t been putting the hours in. Still with the tips I did tonight. Thursdays are pay nights for a lot of people around here. I made a killing in tips around $138 dollars tonight.

It’s a pretty good job. A lot of our clients are really well paid workers like in warehouses and shipping offices and of course the bulk of it is the railway and rail yard employees.

Taylor pays in cash after Thursday night close every week. It saves the girls needing to waste time at the banks. And from what the girls tell me it’s easier to keep ahead of your bills. Dad said the government really frowns on that because there’s less tax money taken off each paycheck. But with his condition he’s got special consideration.

With the girls paid I run upstairs to get changed. I take a quick shower, use my Nair just to be extra spiffy for Tay and the girls and clean up getting some lotion and powder and some Secret spray on for deodorant and get dressed.A Light, light pink nylon and lace bra and panties with the matching slip and a similar colored light cashmere sweater dress that’s a good four inches above my knees. A white belt and a nice pair of white flats. I still wish my hair was longer but I do with it what I can. I put in my pink/rose quartz studs and my little gold heart earrings. I’ve got two holes in each ear, I put on some bangles and I’m ready. I grab my purse and go down to meet Taylor.

I love this dress with that combination of thin tight sweater and short skirt. It really looks great on me and I feel really girly in it. This of course is boosted to me glowing in feminine happiness when Taylor sees me and I see the reaction on his face. That mixture of light in his eyes as he looks at me and the look of wonder on his face as well as the lustful way his gaze roams over my body...

We end up going out to see a movie. I know it might sound lame but we went and seen the cartoon movie “Despicable Me.” it’s a kids movie but still kind of savvy enough that I got a kick out of it. We ate caramel corn and goofed off and we actually had a good time. Actually a great time this wasn’t like the last time I had gone out with Taylor where we were being all dressed up this was me being comfortable, feeling better than I ever have before. I just got to be the teenaged girl out on a regular date with her guy just like everyone else here. I missed out on this.

As we’re leaving I see Ingrid on the arm of one of the guys who I went to school with. He doesn't recognize me. She looks at me doing another double-take to make sure it was me. I smile at her a little as we go passed. “Hi Ingrid.”

“Uhm hi Jenna.”

“Have a fun evening.”

I give her that cutesy finger wave good bye making sure she’s got a chance at seeing my engagement ring. Tay, right on cue slips his arm around my waist and kisses me and I return the favor.

We keep kissing actually all the way out to the truck and head to the airport. He stops and gets me a hot chocolate at a Tims in a mini mall and when I get out of the ladies room he’s walking out of the Laundromat next door with the back seat blankets we had bought while shopping awhile back.

It’s really nice driving out at the airport leaning on Taylor while wrapped in a fuzzy warm blanket sipping hot chocolate as we listen to the local radio station. I’m sleepy but excited too as we get there just a little late their flight is of course delayed and it’s 1:09AM when I see the girls and run up to them and squee while we meet. It’s toned down until we get going, they’re all shy. They compliment me on how lovely I look and said I’m lucky to be so passable. Taylor stops at this place I don’t know? I look at him. “How would you girls like to go and get out of those disguises and into your real clothes?” They’re looking at me. I’m looking at Taylor and that sweetheart Davey opens the door. He’s in these men’s black silk sports pants and he walks over to my door. I open it and give him a hug. “Are you sure Davey?” He smiles which is a lovely thing to see where usually he’s such a nice but kinda of shy and quiet boy. “I’m sure, I’d be honored if you ladies would accept my hospitality.” I’m so frigging proud of him. He turns to open the doors and I see these horrible scars on his back…

It takes a minute for me to get going after that. I look to Tay and he gives me I’ll tell you later look. Yeah…we have looks. When did that happen?

He and Taylor go well above and beyond the call of duty with opening doors and getting the bags as Davey opens his trailer to us so the girls can get en femme and be themselves.

It’s a nice, really nice trailer considering Davey builds houses with Tim i shouldn't be surprised. There’s this oriental theme to the place. He’s got homemade rice paper walls and stuff built to replace the paneling and it looks like a kind of cabin in Japan mixed very strongly with Native American designs and art as well. It’s a mixture that is a really mystical-hip design. Totem masks and soapstone carvings all with a few bonsai trees and fish tanks and stuff like that. I wonder if Njinda has been here yet? She hasn’t mentioned those scars either but with her experiences in Somalia she might not.

The girls are beside themselves with how generous he’s being. Davey just says. “It’s not a big thing really. Jenna is family and she loves you girls, it’s what anyone would’ve done.” He blushes because he still is Davey and the girls hug him before getting to use the master suite and its bathroom. Hope kisses him on his cheek. “Yes it is a big thing, we sometime go too long with out any human kindness.” He’s a little busy with that so I slip Tay aside.

“What the hell happened to Davey? Who did that to his back?”

Taylor starts making tea. He has been here before for sure. He leans back resting his palms on the counter. “His dad did it.”

“His dad?”

“Yeah, Davey’s mom married a guy from Japan. Davey takes after her so that’s why he looks more white than Asian. His dad was a son of a bitch that liked to hit women and she left him when Davey was seven. He got remarried to one of the girls he had on the side during his first marriage and had another kid; Sasha, Davey’s little sister. His second wife died in a car wreck and Davey’s mom still in love with the asshole took him back. He claimed he'd he had changed and she invited him here and they got married again. Then a couple of years back Davey hears his old man trying to get into the pants of his little sister. Davey and he fought and he beats Davey really badly and then angry he takes the chain off the power saw in the garage.”

“Oh, Jesus Christ!”

“Any way he went inside pissed with that chain intending to do who knows what to her with it. And Davey climbed up the trellis with three broken ribs and got in his way. He blocked the door to Sasha’s room. This really pissed his dad off and he started to beat, to whip Davey with the chain cutting his back to ribbons.”

“And where was his mom during all of this?”

“Working, she was an LPN for some old folk’s home.”

"So what happened to his dad?”

“Dead.”

“How?”

“Sasha, she freaked out at how badly her dad hurt him and she jumped him and stabbed him a lot with her nail file.”

“How much is a lot.”

“Dunno it’s in a sealed report because she was a minor. But Davey said he though she stabbed him for twenty minutes.”

“He must have been hurting her long before that happened then. That’s a lot of suppressed rage.”

“She’s still in a care home.”

“Is Davey okay?”

“Yeah, about as well as he can be right?”

The girls are really happy and really grateful to Davey that he did such a gesture. They’re a lot more open but at the same time a lot more scared and nervous too. Even this late at night it’s scary for so many of us. Davey does get four very big hugs from the girls and kissed on the cheek.

We all fit ourselves into Taylor’s truck I’m squeezed next to him and Alice is beside me and the others fit into the backseat and Taylor puts all their luggage into the rear of the truck, then takes out the other warmed blanket and he puts it over the legs of the girls in the back while Alice and I share mine. They are a little shy with him yet gush at the same time and we start talking about my up and coming wedding with the five of us more that likely bugging the heck out of Tay. As we talk and giggle and squee and act like the young teenage girls none of us ever got to be.

It’s twelve after three in the morning by the time we got them to the motel and into their rooms and…wow. Dad had been through here knowing the rooms and who was where had left for the girls a nice spa basket from Clinique, their own towels and bathrobes from Martha Stewart and there was a box of expensive candies and a note done up like a personalized wedding invitation thanking them for coming on such short notice to share in the happiness of my and tailors wedding.

My Daddy is freaking awesome! I cried as much as they did.

Kendal doesn’t really pass with a brown haired wig and she’s got a bit of a too heavy beard and looks a bit like an ex-jock. There’s a prettiness I see that can so be brought out. Alice looks a bit Goth and a red head so really fair skinned but still kind of boy/guy boney. Jenny is a black-girl and has been transitioning so she looks off but doesn’t quite pull it off yet. She needs voice work and her hair is too short but other wise kind of wow. She’s got smaller breast than mine too but I’d love to have hips like that and definitely more in my bottom. Tay loves it but to me my ass is boney. Holly is more in Kendal’s camp of things but shorted and has been fighting her weight and a lot of her clothes make her look dated, older than she should look.

Kendal’s holding her basket and the invitation and is bawling. “I…I…No one has ever done anything like this for me before…” She explodes into sobs that gets all of us going for awhile. We have a tearful goodnight and tell them to call us when they want to come over to our place. Taylor’s closing it tomorrow and we’re not going to be open again until Tuesday. We’re going to use it to get stuff ready for the girls and stuff for the wedding and as our central point of gathering.

They say they’ll be up for a few more hours and they won’t call too early so we can all sleep in.

Its five ten in the morning when Taylor and I hit our sheets both of us too tired to make love. He does pull me up against him and spoons with me his arms around me and I hear him softly singing to me as I drift of to sleep.

“Your love is better than ice cream.”

“Better than anything else that I’ve tried.”

“Your love is better than ice cream.”

“Your love has taught me to fly…”