I was wondering?

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Having recently completed my entry for the latest competition; it got me thinking about what makes a sucessfull story.

The story was quite long in excess of 22k. Hits and feedback were quite low compared to my other writings.

I have always believed in the 'grab their attention quickly' school of thinking when writing short stories. Perhaps the opening lines may have put people off...

Dearest Louise,

When you read this, I will be gone.

I need you to know that it wasn’t your fault; it was just one of those things.

The story implies that Hannah was going to commit suicide, does that put people off? maybe some, but I felt that it was an important aspect of the story and kept the tension high; you know, will she, won't she? The fact that it had an happy ending may not be evident if the reader does not finish or even start reading it.

I'm wondering now that if I had not started with the 'suicide' thing, I might have had more of a response, who know?

Then it got me thinking about what is popular here, complete stories, serials, drabbles, sad, happy, light and fluffy, serious, angst ridden?

Many of the stories on this site are comedies, school life and how girls transition. Also, many of the most popular stories are serials. It makes me wonder what people prefer as many of our readers don't leave comments or vote. It would be nice to have some sort of poll thingie where people vote for their favourite types of stories; that way, authors, if they want to can try to fulfill that need.

Just a few semi random thoughts on the subject...

Hugs
Sue

Comments

Possibly the suicide put people off

I won’t spoil it for others but let’s say the ending is not what you expect at the beginning.

Sorry I didn’t comment earlier, Sue, and no, it's not like you are fishing for complements -- grins –

Generally I find medium length stories get the most buzz, a monument to our hectic, modern lives?

This was well up to your standard, always a high one, and I found it ultimately endearing and uplifting but suicide is a turnoff for many I suspect. I read it in part because it was written by you and I know your track record and usual style. It was different from many of your stories as it was not centered on children or a young adult but was a worth while read and though-provoking..

Thanks for contributing

John in Wauwatosa

P.S. Don't change it.

The opening sets the tone and adds to the suspense. Maybe a comment , note from author gently urging the reader to give your humble story a fair read, at lest a few pages before deciding it’s not for them. Once I was in a few pages, I cared too much to not read the rest.

John in Wauwatosa

I Think Your Lead In May Have Turned Some Off

jengrl's picture

I read your story and I must say that I think it is great. However, I think your lead in, may have turned some people off. I know it is your story to write as you see it, but I might have started the story something like: As I sit here, I think back to the very first time we met. You could then tell the story to your audience and write the letter to Louise as fragments in between telling the story. I think by that time, you will have your audience hooked and wanting to know how everything turns out. You are a wonderful writer and I look forward to your next great story.

Hugs,

Jenn

PICT0013_1_0.jpg

Writing for the readers

isn't the way to go, as good an idea as it sounds. True, serials are popular, and so are stories about young adults and teenagers. I think that, for a lot of us, the chance to be ourselves when we were in high school just holds too much of a draw. Me? It's still recent enough I find it easier to relate to than if the subject were more mature. Even with all that, the same thing over and over gets boring. I don't read mature stories much, but when my normal fare grows tiresome I do like a change.

Melanie

Put off??

Sue

The opening nearly put me off reading it.

BUT I like your other stories so I thought i'd give it a read, the ending was a very pleasant surprise. In fact I was so impressed I was voter No.8 ;)

Sam

read with trepidation

I read your story after I read all the others... but I was ready to stop at a moment's notice.

I personally don't care for serials. They are something I suffer through. Often I get frustrated when chapters are short and I get more and more angry the shorter the chapters get.

I don't even look at 'drabbles'. A story has to be 8k or more to even be considered on the first pass. I'll read others when I'm bored and have run out of 'real' stories.

Anything that implies its a story of a young kid/child gets an automatic pass from me.

There are prolific writers and there are voracious readers. I'm one of the latter. I read a lot, but I'm choosy about what I want to escape into. Fetish stories used to excite me when I was pre-RLT... but I guess having lived through a story myself... I don't want to look back into that undercurrent again.

I am disturbed and more than a little disgusted by stories where any of the characters are humiliated and/or sexually abused repeatedly through the story (rather than being something they are overcoming)

I like long drawn out storys that tell a story in which TSism is a part, but doesn't necessarily color the whole story. TSism being a nmuch smaller subset of TGism.

Now for this next rant please bear with me. I'm very bad with story names. There was a story about a group of colonists who were mixed up by a computer designed to store their souls during the journey that became damaged. I really enjoyed that story.

The caregivers series I've enjoyed... but personally would have been more blood thirsty in editing out non story building stuff.

The story about the commando rescued from death by being run through an alien device then having to flee for her life I also enjoyed. Each chapter was a joy to escape into.

The story about a man who accidentally gets stuck in a body suit and has to hide out while they figure out what to do and over time comes to fall in love with the man helping her hide out. That story was amazing.

A lot of the whately academy stories have been fun to read. They aren't all lightness and fluff... but there is some thrown in to add to the comedy factor. I actually have a Cabbit toy. A stuffed animal with cat head, tail and front legs... and BIG floppy rabbit back feet. The toy I call Cathy is dressed in a school girl uniform and sits prominently to keep me company while working from home writing software.

I guess in reflection... you could say I want to escape into an alternate reality for a few hours/days.

I am a lonely person... so stories with romance usually catch my eye and heart.

I said at the beginning that I dislike serials. I do, but there are exceptions. When chapters are posted several times a week regularly I can tollerate them but when the chapters get short or contain little story building... I regret getting hooked.

Stories that stand out for me right now are "Road to Haifa", "Easy as falling off a bike", "Show me the money", and "Camp Iwannalaya". When ever any of those are posted, I read them first!

Enough about me and my tastes. Writing should be about what YOU want to write. If you only want to be popular... you are setting yourself up for failure.

Dayna.

It's going to be a touch choice

Your story is one of my favourites for this contest; I just loved it.

I soak up everything that you write. You are one of the authors that I admire most of all on this site. Whatever you write is fine with me. Short story, long story or serial, I really don't mind. It's the feeling of being there that makes it for me.

I consider 'Gone With The Wind' to be one of the best stories I've ever read.

There must be romance. It doesn't happen in the story before the implication of suicide, therefore the suicide either fails or isn't attempted. Maybe that's too simple and it's just my illogical computer programmer past surfacing again!

Susie

The Hook

The first few words of a story will either draw people in or send them packing.

Your story was quite well written, but you challenged the reader to go on by 1.) indicating a possible suicide which is a huge turn-off to many readers and 2.) starting off with a letter.

A letter (or a diary) can be good parts of a story, but they will often bore readers to tears. They offer little in the way of scenary and no byplay between the characters. For even the most exceptional writer they can be horribly flat. Don't bother to tell me about all the wonderful pieces of literature that are diaries or long letters, those are the exceptions, written by exceptional writers.

You wrote an excellent story with a feeble, if not off-putting, hook.

Kelly Ann Rogers did a study of the most popular TG literature, which you might want to review.

http://www.storysite.org/story/whatweread~01.html

Angela Rasch (Jill M I)

Angela Rasch (Jill M I)

Gone With The Wind

Thanks for all your comments, they were useful and informative.

I have changed the heading to offset the implication of suicide and hope that it works okay.

Hugs
Sue

Writing about suicide

I can understand your concern about writing a story that people might consider deals with suicide. I recently wrote a short story that actually did deal with that, and I went back and forth for quite a while trying to decide if I should change things, or even post it at all.

Eventually, I posted the story. Although it didn't get as many reads as some of my other stories, I did get some comments that meant a lot to me. Also, I was able to tell a story I felt a need to share, in the way I felt it needed to be told. While stories that deal with suicide might not be as popular as other stories, sometimes, they still need to be told.