Penny Lane

Are Those Yours? -4-

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A nagging loose end that needs attention. I really don't like leaving things unfinished. Expect one more part after this, but it'll come when it is ready. And when I find the time. Sorry, you'll have to read back through for this to make any sense.

Are Those Yours?

by Penny Lane

Chapter 4


"This is madness!"

The two women looked at their companion, who was neither a man nor a woman, exactly. They were standing on the half-landing looking out over a sea of brightly coloured racks, the Women's Floor of Maddens Department Store.

"I just can't do this! It was crazy of me to ever think I could!"

Shirley looked at the speaker and came to a quick decision.

"Right. Cafe, over there." She pointed to an area of shiny chrome chairs and tables in front of the plate glass windows overlooking the square. "Let's go and sit down for a moment. And have a nice cup of tea."

Somewhere Else Entirely -47-

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Palace life continues for Garia as the end of the rainy season approaches. Snep gets his first chance to show his paces and Garia gets her hands on the mysterious swords for the first time. The Queen, however, is not convinced that sword-fighting is all that Garia is up to...

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

47 - Swords and Saddles

Somewhere Else Entirely -46-

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Garia takes her place among the guard recruits to learn how to look after her assigned frayen and there are inevitable consequences... Later, an offer of help comes from a surprising source, and she also learns of another possible arrival on Anmar.

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46 - My Little Pony

Somewhere Else Entirely -45-

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Garia tries to concentrate on her next goal, that of riding in public. However, she is increasingly distracted, and seems completely unaware of the approaching storm that is about to engulf her... and Keren. It is left to the Queen to gather up the pieces and to provide an example for Garia to follow.

Somewhere Else Entirely

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45 - Rules of Engagement

Somewhere Else Entirely -44-

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Garia spends a day around the city as the guest of the Guildsmen of Palarand. She sees the rapid strides they have made so far in the production of paper and in printing, and a lunch at the Guildhall produces some inevitable surprises. A surprise also awaits the Queen that evening...

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

44 - Wet Day Out

Koff, koff, meh.

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Why does everything always happen at the same time? I've had this cold for well over a week now, and it's so bad I can cough in my sleep, often without waking. It's also worked it's way down into my chest, and up into my sinuses...

So the bad weather happens just about now as well, and to top it all I just accidentally trashed one of my servers... twice.

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Somewhere Else Entirely -43-

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Garia encounters Tarvan while the gang cleans Morlan's study, and decides that it's time to give another technology to Palarand. Following an instructive morning Snep gets a new saddle and the King reminds her that she will soon need to take charge of the lands granted to her.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

43 - Current Affairs

There's hope yet

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A very short item from today's Observer Magazine, in which a Gay Dad (separated) each week gives short snippets of life with his two young sons:

Party Wear

Of course, it probably depends quite critically on exactly where and in what cultural surroundings the party was held.

One day, perhaps, all this will seem normal.

Penny

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Somewhere Else Entirely -42-

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Garia's bid to ride a frayen continues with a trip to the armory. The man she meets there provides her with a different kind of challenge... one in which she only partially successful. The royals meet to decide the fate of Garia's project... and Robanar finds himself unexpectedly outnumbered!

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

42 - The King's Armorer

Somewhere Else Entirely -41-

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Garia sees what some men in the Large Training Room are doing, and it gives her an idea. Unfortunately, this proves to be slightly more revolutionary than usual and only receives a cautious assent from the King. Now, all she has to do is to make her wish into reality...

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41 - I Can Do That!

Somewhere Else Entirely -40-

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Garia learns something about her body's limitations as the days of rain continue. Rosilda introduces the bra to Anmar, Garia educates a Metalsmith about the economics of mass production and the Council learn about thermometers, barometers and fire tenders.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

40 - The Wrong Moon

Enough Real Life already!

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I'm sure you'll all have noticed that it has been far too long since the previous chapter of Somewhere Else Entirely was posted. I've finally managed to get the next one up... I ought to be back to a reasonable schedule now, although these days you never know.

I thought I'd explain why there's been such a long delay. Oh, all right, this is a grovelling apology combined with specious excuses why I haven't been writing. Satisfied now?

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Somewhere Else Entirely -39-

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An uncomfortable day for Garia as the first storms which herald the start of the rainy season hit the palace, literally. Some visitors depart while others remain, including Marlin. Garia meets the new Mistress of the Wardrobe and prepares herself for life in the wet.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

39 - Water, Water, Everywhere

Are Those Yours? -3-

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And so this little Ad Hoc tale continues. There won't be any more for at least two weeks, I'm afraid.

Are Those Yours?

by Penny Lane

Chapter 3


The name tag said Shirley. Underneath that, in smaller type, it said Foundation Fitter and underneath that again it said Supervisor.

"Dave? Dave Shepherd? You remember me, don't you? Shirley Boothroyd from school, only I'm Shirley Parsons now. What are you doing in here?"

The man standing in front of her reddened and looked extremely embarrassed, as well he might, since they were standing in the Ladies Underwear department of Maddens, a top department store. They had decided to travel to a nearby city so that he wouldn't meet anyone he knew, and as luck would have it...

Shirley decided that it was more than simple embarrassment that had upset an old school chum. There had been nothing between the two of them to cause any problem so why..? She looked briefly at the two young women with him, and then back to Dave, raising an eyebrow.

"I, um, need to be fitted for a bra."

Are Those Yours? -2-

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My muse simply insists that I develop this tale. There will probably be five or so parts, and at extremely random intervals. But there's a solid tale there, and I have to write it. Enjoy.

Are Those Yours?

by Penny Lane

Chapter 2



Pling Plong.

Dave groaned and forced one eye open. He had fallen asleep on the couch again, his head at a painful angle to the rest of his body. In the corner the television flickered and danced with some daytime quiz program he'd never seen before. He was lying at a low angle, obviously having fallen over as he drifted off. He attempted to straighten up, wincing as his neck assumed its proper orientation. The weights on his chest moved alarmingly, travelling around of their own accord as he sat up, finally assuming their normal hanging position. He yawned.

Somewhere Else Entirely -38-

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Gilbanar makes an intriguing suggestion to Garia before she is confronted by Marlin, who tries again to offer marriage. It leads her to re-evaluate her course of action and makes her doubt her decisions. Later, the second steam engine demonstration goes off as planned and leads to some interesting suggestions.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

38 - Resistance is Futile

Somewhere Else Entirely -37-

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Garia has a busy day impressing the assembled nobility, first with her martial knowledge and then with her engineering expertise. The twins help her understand what was behind Marlin's extraordinary offer.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

37 - Demonstration

Somewhere Else Entirely -36-

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Garia is confronted by a number of puzzles which serve to occupy her on the day following the festival. The highest powers in the land want an accounting for the recent attack, and they learn much about her homeworld. Marlin's peculiar attitude continues throughout the day and results in a development unexpected by all!

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

36 - Many Questions, Few Answers

Somewhere Else Entirely -35-

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It is Harvest Festival, the day when the population comes together to renew the contract between themselves and their King. After a ceremonial procession through the city, a simple lunch is shared by all before the amusements beckon. Garia accompanies Merizel into the maze of booths. What could possibly go wrong? Following an alarming incident, Garia has an encounter with a creature out of legend... and nightmare!

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

35 - Harvest Festival

Somewhere Else Entirely -34-

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The day before the festival, and all the young nobles are in the way as the palace prepares for the procession. After a false start they find a place to gather, and Garia tells them her story. Later, at a State dinner, Garia surprises everyone, including herself, with a new and unexpected talent.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

34 - Loose Ends

What are your Superpowers?

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What with the Comics Retcon and The Center and all, we all have an appreciation of just what a superpower is, don't we? And unless some of you out there aren't telling us something, in RL superpowers aren't going to be available anytime soon.

However, some of us are blessed with certain obscure talents, and I wondered if maybe you'd like to share them with the rest of us.

For instance, I believe my best superpower to be Packing. I can get more things into any box, drawer, room, shopping bag, and, when I was a courier, van, than anyone I have ever met.

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Somewhere Else Entirely -33-

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The palace is hosting nobles, recently arrived for the Harvest Festival. The guests split into gender groups to bring each other up to date with the latest news, which mainly concerns the arrival of Garia in their midst and what she has brought them. In the evening a State dinner is given for the guests, after which Garia is asked a very important question.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

33 - Royal Deliberations

Are Those Yours? -1-

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Sometimes my muse ambushes me with odd little things like this. I hope you'll like it.

Are Those Yours?

by Penny Lane

Chapter 1

"Here's your tea, love," the girl said, putting the mug down on the table.

The man carried on eating his Full English breakfast, only nodding briefly to thank her. After a short while he became aware that she was still standing beside him and he paused, knife and fork in mid-air.

"Do you mind if I ask you," she said softly, "are those yours?"

He knew exactly to what she was referring and nodded again, keeping his head low.

Somewhere Else Entirely -32-

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As the day of the festival approaches the palace begins to fill up with noble guests. A chance encounter means that Garia faces a challenge unlike any she has come across so far.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

32 - Meet the Neighbors

Somewhere Else Entirely -31-

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Garia tells the Council of the Two Worlds what she remembers about the AntiKythera device and they draw some interesting conclusions. Later, Keren has a near miss, Robanar makes a decision, plans for the festival are made and Garia and Merizel visit Mistress Yolda once more.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

31 - Cleaning Crew

Somewhere Else Entirely -30-

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The rest of Garia's guardsmen turn up and she begins training them in earnest. Later the gang go and check out Morlan's quarters, becoming horrified by what they find and realizing that a serious cleaning job is called for. Cue semi-abortive visit to Mistress Yolda and some lateral thinking...

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

30 - Morlan's Laboratory

Somewhere Else Entirely -29-

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Garia talks of knife fights, rainbows, Jarwin's fate, a cleaning job, long white dresses, gods and magic in a day in which all learn something new.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

29 - Of Gods and Magic

Gah! Plumbers!

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Why does it always happen to me? Someone, somewhere, must know a plumber who actually turns up when he says he will, but I've never met one.

For some time now, we've had a damp patch on the (concrete) kitchen floor. Just occasional seepage from somewhere. Not very much, and no smell so I'm guessing it's mains water rather than sewage. Just recently the stains started to get larger and I reluctantly decided that we would have to get the problem fixed.

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Somewhere Else Entirely -28-

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When Garia next goes for training she receives an unexpected reception from the Palace Guard. Having buried the hatchet with Merizel their relationship begins to deepen as Garia introduces some more world-changing technologies.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

28 - Girls, Guards and Gossip

Somewhere Else Entirely -27-

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Garia has to deal with the consequences of the bout with Duke Jarwin. She also has to try and make peace with Lady Merizel, who is still under the impression that Garia was a rival for Jarwin's affections. Then there's the Palace Guard, who want to know what she did...

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

27 - Aftermath

Somewhere Else Entirely -26-

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It is the morning after the night before, and Garia has to face an angry Robanar and a furious Jarwin over breakfast. Accusations and insults fly and the situation becomes quite dangerous. Finally, a challenge is made and reluctantly accepted...

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

26 - A Matter of Honor

Somewhere Else Entirely -25-

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An unexpected visitor has arrived at the palace, the brother of the ruler of a nearby country. Unfortunately he is a sexual predator whose status makes him unstoppable and both Garia and Merizel are at risk. Cue a very tense banquet... and then Garia has an idea.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

25 - Beastly Encounter

Somewhere Else Entirely -24-

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Garia tries out her new training gear with mixed results. A visit to Parrel's workshop in the afternoon includes mention of toilet paper, blast furnaces, glue and canals!

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

24 - Back to Business

Somewhere Else Entirely -23-

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After three days of rest Garia is ready to restart her new existence. She discovers more about palace routine before dropping more bombshells at the next meeting of the Council of the Two Worlds.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

23 - Bells and Black Rock

Somewhere Else Entirely -22-

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Garia's meteoric progress through Palarandi society comes to an abrupt halt as her body receives the Call of Kalikan. As she is completely overwhelmed by the experience the women of the palace gather to offer support and assistance.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

22 - Definitely Female

Somewhere Else Entirely -21-

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Merizel discovers that life in the palace isn't at all what she expected. She struggles to comprehend the relationship between her new employer and the Prince... which seems to be very physical. Meanwhile, Garia has difficulty containing her temper over some innocent questions.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

21 - Educating Merizel

Somewhere Else Entirely -20-

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The afternoon meeting sees the introduction of printing with moveable type - in two different ways. Merizel struggles to keep up with the unusual girl the Queen introduced her to. Later, some news of a distant event is received and Garia finally learns some local geography.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

20 - Of Type and Typing

Somewhere Else Entirely -19-

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Garia's second session in the 'gym' brings further advances but Keren begins to regret participating. On their return Terys introduces a visitor and makes a timely suggestion that might ease the chaos that seems to surround Garia wherever she goes.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

19 - The Secretary

Somewhere Else Entirely -18-

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The evening's council meeting see the release of telescopes and paper and discussion of several other subjects. Later, Jenet discloses a near-embarrassing moment and Garia relives a strange memory.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

18 - Parrel Gets Busy

Somewhere Else Entirely -17-

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Garia finally gets to attempt some exercise, but a dreadful session is only saved by Keren's wise words. A hot afternoon sees Garia journey into the city to inaugurate Anmar's first paper-making experiments. Later, Tarvan is asked some strange questions...

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

17 - On the Mat

Somewhere Else Entirely -16-

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Queen Terys has to bring Mistress Yolda to heel, a task accomplished with some difficulty. Garia finally gets something resembling exercise gear, receives an unexpected gift and then Gerdas has a proposition for her.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

16 - Wrath of the Queen

Somewhere Else Entirely -15-

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Garia's attempts to obtain exercise clothing from Mistress Yolda encounter more resistance than expected, leaving her wondering if she is doing the right thing. The evening is taken up by the funeral of Morlan and Garia's first experience of public ceremony in Palarand.

Somewhere Else Entirely

by Penny Lane

15 - Fire and Ashes

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