"No, I'm an ordinary woman who came to womanhood by a more tortuous path than you, but my world is as boring and mundane as yours. I'm not into any secret worlds except that of The Mammal Society and Portsmouth university cycling club." It was a slight fib, but I felt my cowardice wouldn't allow her to tar me with any brush, except that of normality. Okay, so I'm a hypocrite in some ways, although mostly what I said is true. I live a boringly normal life.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad,
part 192.

The young woman I took to be Stevie's sister led us into the lounge, where a man and woman in their late forties, were waiting. They were both standing as we entered the room.

"Mr and Mrs Naylor, I presume," said Tom, "I'm Professor Tom Agnew and my colleague Cathy Watts." We all shook hands. He was Andrew and she was Debbie.

They offered us tea or other drinks. Tom accepted tea so I decided to show solidarity, a real sacrifice as you know I never touch the stuff. Mandy, the daughter, went off to make it.

"So what brings Steve's Professor and personal tutor all the way to Bristol?" asked Andy Naylor.

"I think I'd better answer that." I took a deep breath and dived in. "We noticed Steve wasn't doing as well as he should have been doing with his previous tutor and Prof Agnew asked me to see him. I could see he had a problem although I wasn't sure what it was. But I got him to trust me and eventually he opened up to me."

"What sort of problem?" asked Debbie, she looked very concerned.

"It's a very personal thing. Steve has AIDS and I took him to hospital yesterday, he is quite ill with a possible tumour on his liver."

There was an almost palpable silence, where the only noise was Mandy in the kitchen and the fridge buzzing in the background somewhere.

"My Steve has AIDS?" asked Debbie, "Surely there is some mistake?"

"It would be wonderful if there was, but he's known for a couple of years." I tried to avoid the gay element although I knew it would happen eventually. In my mind the fact that he was so poorly was the important thing.

Andy looked at us in total horror but said nothing. He put his arm around his wife who was now crying.

Mandy came back into the room carrying the tray of tea, I stood up quickly to take it from her and laid it on the coffee table. "What's going on?" she asked her distraught parents.

"Steve's got AIDS according to these two," said Andy.

"What? No! No that can't be true, it's just flu," she threw herself on the floor next to her parents. "He can't have, he can't have," she called in rebuttal of the truth.

Tom looked at me and with lips pressed tightly together watched the distressed family. There was nothing we could do.

"Is he going to die?" asked Debbie getting some composure.

"I'm not a doctor, but he is very poorly." I offered.

"We should be on our way to see him," she replied, "my little boy."

"He asked me yesterday to come and tell you, the hospital did offer to phone you, but Steve said no. I could hardly refuse him, he looked quite ill."

"How long has he got?" asked Andy.

"I don't know." I shrugged. "I suppose it depends upon how serious the thing on his liver is."

"I thought only queers got AIDS," said Debbie.

"Anyone can get it from unprotected sex." Said Tom, reminding me he was still there for me.

"Is he queer?" Debbie said looking at me.

"I erm," I hesitated, "He told me he was gay, yes."

"Jesus Christ all bloody mighty!" shouted Andy. "You tell me my son is dying and then you have to tell me he's a fucking pansy."

"Irrespective of what his sexuality is, he is still your son and he is still a lovely human being."

"Oh shut up with your bloody platitudes, do you know what this means, do you know what people around here are going to think when they find out?"

"Is that more important than your son's love?" I asked. I was trying to keep my temper, I've been there got the scars and come through it. Stevie wasn't going to be able to fight for himself, but I could. All that was saving Andy from me stripping him layer by layer like an onion was the fact that he was in shock. But if he wanted to fight, I'd eat him alive.

Oh he was twice my size, but I had the secret weapon, I had survived attacks from arseholes like him and grown stronger. I had been exposed to the world and survived. I had been into the pit and climbed out. He was teetering on it's edge, I only had to nudge him and his prejudice would carry him down to its murky depths and maybe drown him there.

He stood up as if to challenge me and I saw Tom tense ready to intervene. But Andy checked himself. "My son a fucking queer," he groaned and dropped to his knees tears streaming down his face. "Why, why?"

"Where is he?" asked Debbie.

I handed her a slip of paper with the hospital address and telephone number. I suggested she ring before they went to make sure which ward he was on.

Mandy was looking at me. I knew she recognised me and sooner or later the penny would drop. What degree she would remember was anyone's guess. I hoped we would have left before then.

"I know you from somewhere," she said looking at me.

"You might have seen Cathy around the university or even the town when you came to see Steve," said Tom.

"No, it's not that."

"I used to live in Bristol," I said.

"Could be, but I dunno." She looked away thinking hard, her pretty face was red eyed and her make up was all streaked. "You were on the telly. You pulled that baby out of the burning car."

Now I really wanted to leave. I looked at my watch, we'd only been there half an hour. It felt like three lifetimes.

"You're gonna marry that Lord bloke, aren't ya?"

I nodded. I was just waiting for the final hammer blow to fall before I got ready to defend myself. It didn't happen. I almost held my breath in anticipation, I could feel the injection of adrenalin coursing through my body as I got ready for fight or flight. I was almost twitching with tension but nothing happened.

"Thank you for coming." Said Debbie anticlimactically.

"I'll see you out," said Mandy showing us to the door.

As we got to the door, she said quietly, "I knew Steve was gay, I just wouldn't believe it. You're very pretty for a boy."

"I'm not one any more." I said back a little defensively.

"I know, don't worry I won't tell them. Is Steve gonna die?"

"I think so," I said quietly and saw fresh tears run down her face.

"You were brave to come and tell us."

"Stevie asked me to come, I couldn't refuse him, he looked so sad."

"Thank you. Can I come and talk to you some day about all this?"

"If you want to, although I can't say I know too much about it."

"But you know a part of Steve I don't."

"I'm not sure I do. I only met him two weeks ago as his tutor and he confided in me. I got him to go to hospital and we went back again yesterday. They admitted him. He also told me he knew what was wrong and asked me to come and tell you."

"Oh, I wondered if you and him, sort of moved in..."

"No, I'm an ordinary woman who came to womanhood by a more tortuous path than you, but my world is as boring and mundane as yours. I'm not into any secret worlds except that of The Mammal Society and Portsmouth university cycling club." It was a slight fib, but I felt my cowardice wouldn't allow her to tar me with any brush, except that of normality. Okay, so I'm a hypocrite in some ways, although mostly what I said is true. I live a boringly normal life.

"Okay, I believe you, but I'd still like to talk to you some day."

"Okay Mandy, contact me via the university and I'll see what I can do."

"It was you with the hamster down your jumper?"

"Dormouse," I corrected her, "yes that was me and Spike."

She laughed, releasing her tension and I laughed too, then Tom put his hand on my shoulder and we walked back to the car.