This is the continuing Story of Carol’s life. Still full of uncertainties about his future, not knowing who to turn to for the answers but getting a glimse of, HOPE Chris W.

Part 4

“Here is my card Julia, call me and I will tell you when and where we will meet tonight…”

Patty was serving the dinner since my mommy was on her way home from the hospital. Patty wasn’t happy with the gathered members of my family. Even when my daddy told her, how good she had done cooking and preparing the meal and table. Of course, Dee (Dianna) had refused to help and my daddy once again let her get away with it. If my mommy were there, Dee would have been MADE to help in the kitchen.

The bad thing happened when Dee said.

“Daddy, do you think Carol will come home again?”

Daddy replied.

“I don’t know ‘Champ’, your mother tells me Carol isn’t doing well at all. Carol wants to die and I hope God lets it happen this time.”

Patty became so mad she grabbed the big pot of spaghetti she had just put on the table and dumped it right on the floor! She said.

“DADDY, how can you be such a monster? Carol is the sweetest and is always trying to help! Even when he is hurting and sick he is always trying to help mommy and me! You, Dianna and Jimmy are selfish monsters and all you think of is yourselves! This is the last time I will cook and clean for any of you! You can do it all yourselves from now on!”

My daddy grabbed her arms, held her tight, he looked mean, and nasty. He was mad as hell! He let go with one hand and slapped her hard across her face! He hollered.

“Patty, no daughter of mine will ever talk to me like that and get away with it! I’m so tired of working double shifts every day, sixteen hours a day I work for my family and that includes you! What do we have to show for all of my hard work? NOTHING! Nothing thanks to Carol and all the hospital bills I have to pay. Carol is the reason none of you have anything nice to wear, no nice things to play with, just food that we can get enough of to feed us that is cheap and affordable with our limited budget! Face the truth for once Patty! You and your mother are living in a fantasyland! Carol will never get well enough to succeed at anything. Carol can’t even be the boy that it is! Just look at that child! It looks just like your mother when she was little! A boy that is more girl than boy, a boy that is always sick and needs constant care and all of my money just to keep it alive! I refuse to recognize that child as mine! What has it ever done than need? Huh? You tell me now, what has that child ever done to help any of us here?”

My sister Patty, now holding her red and swollen cheek shot daggers from her eyes at each of them. My sister Dee was smiling and my brother Jimmy had a smirk on his face. My daddy, well he was all red in the face and I think he realized he had said too much! He just revealed to her his true feelings towards me and they were not good ones!

Patty answered him.

“He has given us more than you three ever have. He has given everything he has and everything he can give, whenever he could give it! He has given of himself totally without any reservation and without any demands or asked for anything in return. You three, HA, all you three ever want is more; more food, more clothes, more toys, and more free time to do what you want! Dianna, you are the worst of all and daddy lets you get away with it! You are the meanest, most selfish, greedy and evil girl on this planet! You want to be a boy. Fine, get out of my room and move in with Jimmy. I would rather sleep in the cellar than spend one more day in a room with you! As for you Jimmy, all you ever do is make Carol do things for you and even when he does, at school you make his life hell! What has Carol ever done to deserve such hatred from the three of you? YES HATRED! That is the only word I can come up with that fits how you treat Carol every day, day after day! Well, I’ve had enough!

“Daddy, you can slap me and you can beat me, but I will no longer serve any of you. You three deserve each other and you three can now take care of yourselves. You are so perfect and you are so good, you don’t need anyone right? The heck with you all, I’ve had it!”

Patty ran upstairs and started moving all of Dianna’s things into Jimmy’s room. She just threw them in Jimmy’s room as they landed here and there. She thought.

“Let them clean up their own messes this time. Carol has always cleaned up after them and it isn’t fair. They hate him and all they ever do is use him and treat him badly.”

Patty was crying as the three just looked at each other. Daddy was still hopping mad, but he just sat down with his head in his hands. Jimmy and Dianna just smirked, but looked up as they heard things being tossed into Jimmy’s room.

Mommy pulled into the driveway and this made the three look at each other again. Mommy walked in, her eyes swollen and red. Her tears still falling freely as she took in the sight.

She asked them.

“Where is Patty?”

They just pointed upstairs as one. Mommy looked to Jimmy and Dianna and said.

“Clean this mess up, NOW!”

Surprisingly daddy didn’t even look up, so Dianna and Jimmy, knowing better than to argue with mommy without daddy to back them up, started cleaning up the mess really fast!

Mommy went upstairs, took in the sight, and understood the unspoken reasons for Patty’s actions. They hugged and cried on each other’s shoulders. Patty then explained everything that happened to her mommy. Patty asked her to help and they moved Dianna’s bed into Jimmy’s room and everything else that was Dianna’s soon was in Jimmy’s room. Mommy told Patty what happened at the hospital with Carol.

Mommy then went downstairs and told Daddy and Dianna they had to go see Dr. Cathy tonight. Dianna groaned and mumbled that she would have to wear a dress, but mommy surprised her and told her to dress anyway she wanted to dress. Since to daddy Carol was a little girl, from that moment on, mommy would treat Dianna as a boy.

She said.

“You have those work clothes your daddy bought for you and those work boots. You can wear those. Oh and when you get back, I will have the hair clippers ready, and we will give you a haircut. No son of mine is going around with long girlish hair! Oh, and Jimmy, go help your Brother ‘Champ’ put away his clothes and things. You are both sharing your room now.”

They just stood there looking at mommy. They didn’t know what to say, my daddy was stunned and was just staring at mommy.

She said.

“Go on, and do it now! I will finish up down here while I talk to your father. It might be just you three living here soon. It all depends on what your father says, now go!”

Dr. Cathy had the nurses change my gown to a little boy’s gown. She talked to each of the nurses and told the head nurse she wanted to see each of the nurses that would be taking care of Carol. She told them each the same thing and that was to treat me like the little boy I was, and if she heard that, any of them treated me different or treated me like a baby, that would be the last day they would work in this hospital. The nurses sure did listen to her then! The head nurse even told the other head nurses and the word spread faster than a wildfire on a hot, dry, windy day!

Mommy fixed daddy some coffee and she made herself and Patty some tea. Mommy had made an ice pack for Patty’s cheek and looked daggers at daddy!

Mommy said.

“Bill, drink your coffee, gather your thoughts and when I am through on the phone, we will have a talk and you had DAMN WELL BETTER LISTEN TO ME THIS TIME!”

Mommy had Patty go with her and they took the phone into my room and mommy made several calls. The first one was to Dr. Cindy and she left a message. The next one was to my Auntie Harriett, they talked for a little while, and Auntie Harriett was soon on her way over.

My mommy called the convent next and talked to Sister Anne. Sister Anne then called Father Kowalski and they both were headed to the hospital to see me. Mommy waited for the phone to ring and that’s when Patty and she had a nice talk. Dr. Cindy called and would see Daddy and Dianna at nine that very night!

Mommy and Patty waited until Auntie Harriett arrived. They talked for a while and then came out of my room; they all sat at the kitchen table with my daddy. He sure looked worried!

Mommy started by saying.

“Bill, Carol tried to kill himself for us. He didn’t want to be a monetary burden to us anymore. He heard you call him useless and he believes that. He also knows that Dianna and Jimmy hate him and believes our situation is his entire fault. YOU are responsible for this Bill! I am responsible; our entire family with one exception is at fault! That exception is Patty and you slapped her across the face for trying to tell you the truth! Now, if your feelings toward Carol as Patty has told me are true, we have nothing further to discuss. Patty and I will be moving to Harriett’s and you can have the two BOYS and this house you care more for than your own child!”

My daddy stood up, grabbed my mommy in a big hug, and started crying! He tried to talk, but he just couldn’t. He does love my mommy tons and ton’s. He loves his family, but I guess I’m the exception. I ruin all his plans for what he wants to get and provide them with.

It’s all my fault! If I was dead, they would all be happy and have nice things, real good food, a nice car, daddy would only have to work regular hours and be there for them.

I wake up and slowly get my sight and feeling back. A nurse is smiling at me and she says.

“And how is our scrappy boy doing now?”

WOW! She called me a boy! I look down and see I’m wearing a little boys Johnny, baseball players! COOL!

Then I notice I’m all tied up again. Still in diapers and rubber pants, I can feel them. The nurse smiled at me and offered me some ice chips to chew on. I gladly accepted them and smiled at her, she said.

“Now that is the nicest smile I have seen in years Carol. Thank you, I needed a nice smile this evening, it has been a long hard day for me, and I have another shift to go yet.”

I said.

“Um, where am I Nurse?”

“Carol you are in the best and safest place in the whole hospital now. No one will be teasing you or making you do things you don’t want to do okay?”

“Really Nurse? Um, will they let me die here?”

“Carol, please call me Pat okay?”

“Oh, okay, my bestest sister is named Patty. I love her lots and lots! She can’t have any nice things because of me. My mommy can’t have any nice things because of me. It’s all my fault that my family can’t have nice things. That’s why Jimmy and Dianna hate me. My daddy doesn’t want me either. I tried real hard at home to help and not fuss about having to wear the girl’s clothes, but I still cost them too much money. That’s why my daddy has to work so much. He’s always working and never has much time to spend with his favorite kids.

“His favorites are Dee and Jimmy. He loves Patty and my mommy too, but Dee is more of a boy than I am, so he loves her the most. She does all the boy things I can’t and she even wants to be a boy. My daddy even buys her boy’s stuff. She hates wearing her bra and mommy has to make her wear it.”

I giggle and Nurse Pat laughs. She just lets me talk and I ramble on about my family and how it is all my fault that they don’t have nothin’.

I keep munching on the ice chips and then she even got me some ice cream! She had to feed it to me, but it was real good! I had chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry! We talked and she fed me, always smiling and treating me nice. I even had some soup! She makes me happy and I can talk and talk!

The meeting in the kitchen turned serious as mommy told daddy everything Dr. Cindy had said. She then told him that if it came down to a decision of staying with him and giving up me to the state, he would lose and could keep the children he loved the most. Mommy and Patty would move in with Auntie Harriett and I would stay with them. That way, he could cut back his hours and concentrate on spending his hard earned money on just three people. Either way, it all depended on how his and Dianna’s meeting with Dr. Cindy went. Mommy is going to call Dr. Cindy and inform her of what she had planned and what had went on in the house while she was gone between Patty and the rest of them. Daddy still crying managed to say that he would try to change.

Father Kowalski and Sister Anne arrived at the hospital and ran into a stone wall as they tried to see me. The head nurse made them wait while she paged Dr. Cindy. It turns out that they had a nice long talk and were allowed to come see me one at a time. Sister Anne was first.

Nurse Pat saw her at the door and talked to her for a minute. I was so happy! Sister Anne is here to see me! I love Sister Anne! She is the coolest Sister in the whole wide world! I said.

“Sister Anne! Sister Anne! I missed you so much! Jesus didn’t answer me again! Maybe you can talk to Him for me?”

Sister Anne and I talked and talked! I was feeling so good now that I could talk to people who actually listened to what I said! She even brought me my favorite blueberry muffins! She makes the bestest blueberry muffins ever! She fed me bite after bite between talking. I was even given a strawberry milkshake to drink! Things were looking very good in this new place at the hospital!

Dr. Cindy was being briefed by Nurse Pat and they were both real happy! I was eating and didn’t even realize it! I was happy for the first time since I was hospitalized and all it took was for someone to treat me like the little boy I was and really listen!
I talked and ate, talked and ate. Where did she get all those muffins? Anyway, we started talking about prayer, how much more Elohim liked it when they were sung from the heart. Much more so, than when they were just said and wanting something for yourself instead of asking Elohim’s help with others.
I told her that I wish I could go to church, but I was always being tied up now. I started getting sad again, but Sister Anne told me to hang on a minute and she would go see what she could do about that. I was hopeful and that made me happy!

Oh GEEZE, am I stuffed! Nurse Pat comes in with Dr. Cindy and they are smiling real big! They seem real happy and that makes me smile…

To Be Continued…