Previously

Monday 29/6/59
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We were up early once again and had breakfast, made our school lunches and got dressed in our school uniforms. We did each others hair in pony tails with the school colour ribbons to hold them in place. Mummy drove us to school and I would be driven to school till I could ride my bike again once my ankle healed and was strong enough to push the bike pedals.

We were greeted by Brenda and June and they gave me a hug and said that the whole school was upset about what happened to me last week and that Brad had been sent to a boys home to sort him out. We all walked to where our school bags were left and went to the parade ground for morning assembly.

The whole school assembled on the parade ground every morning unless it rained and the principal addressed the school and gave his little pep talk and any other business on the day's agenda but that day he made mention of what happened to me the previous week and said that I would not be hassled by any other student or they would be expelled like Bradley Blake without question. Then he ended his address and we all made our way to our class room to start the day's lessons.

Once I was sitting at my desk beside Jenny, I looked around and saw Brenda and June were sitting behind me and I felt myself starting to relax a bit. Peter Taylor my teacher said “Good morning class.” and we all said “Good morning sir.” and then he stood in front of the class and said “We have our little girl back today so make sure she is not being bullied by anyone today or look out!”

The whole class said, “Yes sir.”

Of course the first lesson was maths. 'Oh boy!' I thought I would be in trouble but in actual fact the way Mr Taylor was explaining things made it quite easy to understand, so I might not be the dummy I thought I was at maths after all. It was no time at all and the morning break bell went and we all filed out of the classroom and went out into the play-ground to just talk and have our oranges or an apple. The four of us girls were sitting down on a bench under a giant pepereena tree when some girls walked over to us and one said to me, “You're Carla aren’t you? I'm Sandy and I am really sorry that monster Bradley attacked you like that.”

I replied, “Yeah, it really hurt when he punched me in the face, and I bled all over my nice new blouse. Mummy ended having to throw it in the bin so I had to borrow Jenny's spare one till some new one come from Brisbane to Mary's dress shop.”

Sandy then said, “I heard you sing at church the other day. I was standing right next to you. You have a really nice voice Carla.”

I replied, “Did you know that I have joined the church choir?”

“Yes, and that is why I am talking to you now. How would you like to be part of the school choir?”

“Ok but I don't know if I'm good enough for that.”

She replied “Oh you're good enough alright because when I spoke with the music teacher Miss Tracy Alcorn she said she heard about you from Pastor Miller, so if he thinks you are good enough than you will be good enough for Miss Alcorn.”

There were six boys and six girls in the school choir and now they would have an extra one. I would be the youngest at nine, and the oldest one was a boy named Rodney and he was sixteen.

The bell went and we had to head back to the classroom and as we were walking back Ricky came up and asked if I was coping ok with my sore ankle.

I replied “I’ll survive.” I think he just wanted to say hello and let me know he was looking out for me. 'I think he loves me'.

Brenda said, “Hey! he's cute, is he really your boyfriend?”

I replied, “Yep, eyes off!”

Brenda said, “Don't worry Carla, I'm not allowed to have a boy friend, Mummy says they are only trouble anyway.”

I replied “Oh Ricky’s no trouble. I can get him to do anything for me I just have to use my magic eyes.” and we all started to giggle and walked back into the classroom.

The next subject was English and writing a composition on the history of Queensland Railways and what it did to open up the outback for the cattle industry. Well I knew all about the sheep and wool industry but in a way it was the same railway that carried the bales of wool to the Brisbane wool stores to be auctioned off to the world wool garment industries. So I included that in my composition and hoped that it would get a pass when my teacher marked it, I guessed I’d find out at the start of the next day. That took us to the lunch bell. It was an hour long, so more gossip, talking with my friends about what we going to do in the August school holidays and clothes.

Once I had my sandwiches and a drink of cordial that I had in a bottle in my lunch pack, I was putting it away when Sandy came up to me and said, “Carla, Miss Alcorn asked me to come and get you once you were finished your lunch and bring you to her, because she wants to talk to you about you joining the choir.”

Jenny said, “Can I come too Sandy?”

She replied, “I don’t see why not, so come on then Carla lets go.”

I replied, “Ok, just let me put my lunch things away.” Jenny and I said 'see you back in class' to Brenda and June and went with Sandy to the classroom that the music teacher used.

Sandy said she was eleven years old and was in grade six and she should be in grade seven but she was quite sick in grade three and spent a lot of time in hospital in Brisbane, so she had to repeat grade three again.

Anyway we arrived at the music teachers classroom and knocked on the door and a middle aged lady with a big warm smile said, “Hello, you must be the famous Carla I have been hearing about.” I could feel my face getting hot so I must have been blushing.

She said, “Carla, I’m sorry you had a bad start at school last week, but that boy was always a trouble-maker and I’m glad he got sent to a place where they might straighten him out.”

I replied, “I know he hurt me miss, but now his mother is on her own and I feel that it was because of my other father, she does not have any one to talk to.”

Miss Alcorn said, “Carla dear, I can see you are a very caring little girl and I will look into it and see we can't do something about helping Mrs Blake. If you come back to me before the end of the week I will see if we can go and talk to her ok?”

I replied, “Thank you miss.” So she then talked to me about my singing at the church and how impressed Mr Miller was with my voice and she wasn't about take no for an answer for me to become part of the choir.

Then Jenny said, “Miss Alcorn, can I have a try out for the school choir as well, because I have heard Carla sing a lot, and I think she can probable teach me to sing as well?”

Miss Alcorn replied, “Jenny, the more the merrier. We will start you both off next week and see what range your voices have so we know how to place you in the choir make up.”

Well that took us to the bell for this afternoon's class and it was domestic training for the girls and manual arts for the boys. This lesson I liked, because I have been taught by Mummy a qualified chef in the kitchen, and for sewing Rita has taught me to be able to sew a dress for myself on her Singer sewing machine that she was given for her fifteenth birthday by Margaret Croft the wife of the owner of River Downs, the sheep station we lived on till recently.

The afternoon went quickly. We baked a shepherd's pie and got to take it home for our parents to try. It was good to learn to do a shepherd's pie because it is the only thing that I haven't tried to bake at home yet I think Mummy will be pleased that I am learning to do new things as well. Our domestic training teacher was a younger lady by the name of Mrs Jane Robinson who was very softly spoken so you had to listen to her very carefully to make sure you didn't miss what she was saying.

She handed us our marks at the end of class and I got an eighty percent tag on the top of my pie. I of course thought it should have been ninety ninety percent, but then I am perfect at everything!

Jenny just rolled her eyes at me and said, “We both should have got one hundred percent.” and we both got into trouble for giggling in the class room, and had to stay back for ten minutes to help put everything away.

Mummy was waiting for me and Jenny as we came out of the main gate of the school grounds and was surprised to see we were carrying two shepherds' pies.

She said, “Well we have two little chefs now have we?”

I said, “No Mummy, but I think mine deserved a higher mark than eighty percent.”

Mummy replied, “Well the proof will be in the pudding won't it, so I will pass judgment when we try it out for dinner tonight.”

I said “Mummy, I have to bring some money to Mrs Robinson tomorrow for the ingredients. The school doesn’t pay for that.”

Mummy said, “How much do you owe?”

I said, “Oh I forgot to ask.”

Jenny said, “It is usually five shillings Aunty Donna.”

Mummy replied, “Ok, Carla, remind me in the morning to give you the money.”

We got into the car. Mummy was driving Daddy’s car for some reason but I didn't to bother to find out why. We stopped to drop off Jenny at her home and drove straight home. I had homework to see to so Mummy said to go and change out of my school uniform and get my home work done while she got dinner under way.

My ankle still had to have a bandage on it to stop it from swelling but it really didn't hurt any more so, when I was finished my home work I went outside and gave the two dogs a workout with the balls. I would be glad when I could get on my bike again and take them down to the park for a run in the afternoons. At least I wouldn't have any problems with anyone giving me any trouble because Ginger would have them in one go. Daddy and Rita arrived home and I set the table for dinner. It was spaghetti bolognese and my shepherd's pie. I cut the pie into four equal pieces and placed them on separate little plates.

Mummy, Daddy, and Rita came home by six o'clock now and left the running of the restaurant to Aunty Bella, Linda and Alice with Alice's Mum coming in when it got too busy.

Anyway ,back to my pie. Mummy said, “We should eat it first because I want to taste it before the taste of the Bolognese is in my mouth.” so we all picked up the pie and took a bite out of the smallish piece of we had. I just held my breath and waited till every one had a chance to have a taste.

Daddy spoke first and said, “Wow Carla, that gets the thumbs up for me.” Mummy and Rita were still chewing theirs and just made big eyes and nodded their heads in agreement with Daddy.

I said, “It's more yummy than I thought it would be, so why did I only get an eighty percent mark from Mrs Robinson?”

Mummy said, “I don’t think she had a taste did she?”

I replied, “No. She said she would have to taste every one and then she would not be able to tell the difference in the end.”

Mummy said, “Yeah that makes sense. I think if you ask the rest of the class tomorrow they would all have gotten eighty percent marking. She is a very clever teacher.”

Once dinner was over and everything cleaned up and put away, we went into the lounge and talked instead of watching television. Mummy brought up the subject of my inter-sexed condition and said that she got a call from Doctor Ryan today and he wants to see me tomorrow after school to take some blood and see what I am feeling like emotionally with the girl pills that I am taking every morning.

I said, “Mummy, how should I feel any different? I am a girl, so how can the pills make me feel any different?”

Mummy replied, “Well when a girl goes through puberty it is not only the body that changes but your emotions also change. Just ask Rita and she will enlighten you as to what you go through when you get your first period.”

I replied “But Mummy I haven’t got an opening down there so where will the blood come out of me?” At this stage Daddy got up and said “I don't think you ladies need me around for this discussion so I’ll go and read in bed.” and gave all us girls a kiss on the cheek and said goodnight.

Mummy continued to tell me what the doctors had planned for me once they had discovered that I have ovaries and that I will at some stage in the not too distant future need to have on operation to make me be able to have periods like a normal girl.

I then asked, “Does that mean I will have a proper vagina like you and Rita and be able to give birth to a baby?”

Mummy replied, “I believe you will be able to give birth but it might have to be by caesarean.”

I said, “What is that?”

Rita said before Mummy could reply, “They cut you open to get the baby out of your tummy.”

“Ohh I don't think I will have any kids.” I said as I shuddered to think about it.

Mummy said, “Carla don't you worry about any of that at the moment. First things first ok?”

“But Mummy!”

“Carla, calm down. That is a long way off and you might find that after they have fixed you up that your vagina will be as normal as any other girl and then you can go through the pain of giving birth like the rest of us.”

I went to bed and dreamed of being cut up like a sheep in a butcher's shop and at one stage was calling out to Jean to save me. She responded and calmed me down enough to get me to go back to sleep.

Tuesday 30/6/59
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I woke up still thinking about the dream I had and then Jean was in my mind and she kept saying “Carla be calm be calm.” and it was as if she had zapped me with some sort of electric currant and I just went all floppy and had to lay back down. I went back to sleep and Mummy came in and had to wake me up to have a shower and get ready to go to school.

Mummy picked up Jenny on our way and Jenny's Dad Don MacKenzie came out to the car and said, “Donna, thank you for having Jenny over at your place. She really gets quite lonely some time with just us adults, and Carla and her are more like sisters now.”

Mummy replied, “Jenny is no problem and she can stay with us anytime.” Both Jenny and I nodded our heads and then Jenny kissed her Daddy and said, “See you tonight” and got in the car and we were on our way to school.

Tuesday was sports day and I noticed that Jenny was wearing a t-shirt and short pleated skirt when she got in the car, and it was hard for her to get in and not show her knickers to me. She said “Oops, at least there are no boys around.”

I replied, “I haven't got a sports outfit yet. I wonder if I'll need one today?”

“It's all in hand Carla. Barry rang me last night and told me to get you to go to his office as soon as you arrive at the school this morning and he will give you the sports uniform.” Mummy explained.

I replied, “How do they know if it is going to fit me Mummy?”

“Carla, there are a lot of second hand school uniforms that mothers bring into the school for just this type of thing.”

“But Mummy, it's not new.”

“Sweetheart, I talked to Mary but she hasn't got your size in stock at the moment so this one will have to do for now.”

“But Mummy it might not fit me.” I whined. Jenny tried to console me and said, “Carla it will be ok! I bet it will fit you like a glove.”

I replied, “That’s what I’m afraid of.” and we both started to giggle.

Mummy pulled up at the main gate and said, “Carla sweetheart, there is a new uniform on order for you so it will only be today that you will have to wear the one they have found for you, so don't worry, you will look just as pretty as you always do.”

“Yes Mummy.”

“Ok, now give your Mummy a kiss and get in there.” I gave Mummy a kiss and so did Jenny who said, “Aunty Donna, I will look after her today. She'll be fine.”

Mummy breathed a sigh of relief and said, “Fussy girls!!” and drove off to work.

Jenny and I both went straight to the principal's office and knocked on his door, but it was Mrs Robinson who answered the door and she said, “Come in girls, I’ve been waiting for you. Carla, I want you to try this uniform on for me, I think it is the right size.”

I replied, “What here in the office?”

“Carla I will be here and to make sure no one comes in I will lock the door, ok?”

“Yes Mrs Robinson.” She was right it did fit me perfectly, and Jenny said, “I told you it would be ok didn't I?” Anyway I kept the sports uniform on and folded up my other one and put it in a bag that Mrs Robinson gave me.

Jenny and I went to our classroom to put our bags were they belonged and then went out to the parade ground for morning assembly. I asked Jenny what sport she played in and she said, “Well I play tennis, but there is also gymnastics and folk dancing for the girls. I think the boys mainly play football and cricket.”

I said, “I can play tennis because there was a tennis court at River Downs, and me and Rita used to play with some of the workers on weekends so I got quite good at it.”

Jenny said, “Ooh, that is brilliant. We will win every game of doubles that we play.”

After morning assembly we went to our classroom and did a couple of subjects till the morning break bell rang and we all filed out to the playground and had our bits of fruit or cake. When the bell rang again, our teacher was at the play ground and said “Alright everyone, you know what sport you all belong to so off you go.”

Jenny and I started to walked to the tennis courts and I said, “These uniforms are not the right ones for playing tennis in.”

Jenny replied, “well it is only the colour that is wrong, but they said it would be too expensive to have separate uniforms for different sports.”

Anyway, I still had a strapped up ankle so I would only be watching that day. Sports day was a short day for some students because most of the teachers were out in the playground, so there were no teachers left to go back to the class room. Mummy must have known about that because she came to the tennis courts and waited till Jenny had finished her game and then we collected our school bags and Mummy took us home. Jenny came to our place for her Mum to pick her up later in the afternoon. We played with the dogs till Jenny's Mum arrived.

To be continued.

Next time: More school and going out bush with Alice, meeting with aboriginal elders.

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