The Weekly Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 3311 by Angharad Copyright© 2021 Angharad

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This is a work of fiction any mention of real people, places or institutions is purely coincidental and does not imply that they are as suggested in the story.
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Diane had found a vase I'd left in the kitchen cupboard. It was from the days when Simon used to send me flowers on a semi-regular basis, nowadays he didn't. We seemed to have grown into an old married couple. In terms of love and affection, I hoped it was true, in terms of taking each other for granted, I hoped it wasn't.

The girls took us for granted, but children always do, and I don't have a problem with that, they're usually dealing with constant changes in their lives and I hoped we didn't add to those stresses - well not too much. Danielle, who constantly surprised me, sometimes as a surly, defiant teenager and then the polar opposite as a very sensitive and sensible young woman. Because she'd started hormone therapy before she'd really got into her male puberty, she was also very female looking and facially very pretty. Her football, she was now a professional, kept her fit but also caused various injuries to occur. At present, she was limping around with elbow crutches after she got tackled rather heavily by a Chelsea player.

Because she's so talented on the field, opposition teams often look to either smother her by having two or three players restrict her game, or by targeting her for rough tackles. Much of the time, she is able to ride these or even avoid them, occasionally making the offender look clumsy or stupid or even criminal and several have been yellow or red-carded for their efforts. If it results in a penalty, she tries to take them herself to show she wasn't intimidated. Given that she's often smaller than the offenders, I know, biological male - you'd expect her to be bigger, she relies on guile and this wonderful talent and on occasion she also hands out some of the rough stuff.

One woman who came charging at her like an enraged cow, ended up with torn knee cartilages after her attack went wrong and Danni managed to get her off-balance before twisting her round while her leg remained as it was. She went off on a stretcher and the video showed it was her own clumsiness and momentum that caused the injury. One of her teammates also ended up going off with an injury and a yellow card for another tackle that Danni saw coming and dodged. It was too crude for the ref to ignore and her torn hamstring mean she had insult added to injury with the yellow card for a reckless challenge.

Danni no longer plays for the school team, though when fit she does help to coach them, teaching them skills and tactics. Most of them are a little better, though Trish has learned and, while only a fraction as skilled as her older sister, she is better than most schoolgirl players and she has been approached by the county to play for Hampshire schoolgirls. That resulted in a full family debate after the trouble that Danni had following her England appearances.

Simon and I agreed that Trish should make her own decision about playing for Hampshire schools and we left her talking to Danni about it and the pros and cons it entailed. In the end she decided she would because it would look good on her CV after the Nobel prize for Physics and being master of an Oxford college at 19.

Yeah okay, my family are a bit different. They are partly because of the gender problems they've overcome, or the abuse they suffered as children and dealt with, or because they all seem very bright. Not being their natural parents we can't claim for any of that, all we did was to offer them a safe environment where they could experiment and grow while encouraging them to learn academically as well as in their life skills.

Simon and I are high achievers by most people's definition but I never think of it as I deal with life. Some might suggest that I have been lucky in being in the right place at the right time and have progressed because of that, or even a bit of nepotism given his father is chairman and major shareholder of the bank and my adopted father just happens to be Vice-Chancellor of the university.

I won't deny it might have helped insofar as we were both known to the powers that be but I also believe it meant that the examination we received before being promoted was even more extensive than the other candidates. I ran the biology department for several months while Tom was dean, and then acting VC. I ran the mammal survey which got us international acclaim. I made award-winning documentaries for the BBC and I also helped to raise ten young women who are a credit to our family. While I'm not sure I like blowing one's own trumpet unless one is a musician - and then I'd rather play the fiddle, sometimes I reflect on where I began and where I am now.

I suppose the next step is to move to a bigger university and bigger projects. I really don't know as the girls' education is important and I'd hate to disturb that. Then there is also Tom, he'd always tell me to go for the better job but it would hurt him so much, I couldn't consider it. We live in a big house and have plenty of everything, so why change anything?

The short answer is that you don't grow without challenges and when life is comfortable you don't look for challenges, though perhaps being married to Simon, running a university super-department, and having half a dozen kids plus an ageing father and the big house mentioned above is challenging enough. I don't know, but I'm looking for a new housekeeper - they don't stay for long, yet they say we were good employers - so go figure.

Perhaps they just want jobs rather than having a stake in the family and household as David, our chef has done, he is part of the family although he still receives a salary as well as his tied cottage. I wish he had a romantic interest in his life rather than just us to sustain his emotional needs, but those I've witnessed have not gone well, which makes me think that in my own relationship and marriage I have been so fortunate and Simon and I love each other as much as we ever have. We've had our problems, but in a healthy relationship that happens, it's how it grows, and the children have caused issues which have tested us somewhat, but we eventually see the solution by all working together, as family. It could work for society as well except people are rarely prepared to compromise enough to make it, but then society doesn't have an emotional investment in itself except for short periods of heightened awareness like the murder of young women in London. We still have violence against women but now the women are demanding things change and increasing numbers of men are supporting us, so perhaps one day it will change. I have to believe that it will, with ten daughters. But we need to address the anger and polarisation that is happening to have any chance of it. It would be wonderful if we could, if we could heal the fractures but to do so means changing the basis of power and that will be greatly resisted.

I see a professor of philosophy has resigned from Sussex University after what was considered transphobic remarks. She claims they weren't but the activists deemed them otherwise. I think it's got to the point of stupidity that anything anyone says can be used against them by extremists or those looking to find fault. Perhaps that guy from the New Testament was right and we should take the plank out of our own eyes before seeking to remove a speck from others.

I am aware that many people who are gender discordant have problems, sometimes it's through bigotry on the part of others, sometimes it's just serendipity and sometimes they bring it on themselves. I suspect some of the issues I suffered earlier in my life were my own fault or just poor perception of a situation or the people involved. I've got better with age and experience in understanding my own and the frailties of others and I hope not flying off the handle so quickly.

"There that looks better," said Diane placing the vase of flowers on the coffee table in my outer office, where she sits along with the meeting table and the comfy seating, thereby rousing me from my reverie. I found I tended to sit and daydream more than I used to - um, not quite true because I used to daydream a lot in school while watching the girls going into their part of the buildings envying them their looks and their clothes and even the makeup they wore which they weren't supposed to but did anyway.

"Professor, woo-hoo, Earth to Cathy."

"What?" I replied feeling somewhat disgruntled.

"You were away in a dream, boss."

"Yes, I'm a professor, which like a judge means that I am expected to hold opinions which only form after due deliberation and consideration, which are then what I profess to be true."

"Wow, boss, did you deliberate and consider that opinion all by yourself?"

"Don't be daft, Tom said it years ago when I woke him up." We both chuckled.

"I've thought about Saturday," she said after a moment's pause.

"And, what do you profess after due deliberation and consideration?"

"Lunch, if that's okay."

"Okay, I'll ask David to make something tasty but light."

"What, like low-fat chips?"

"Exactly," I said trying to keep a straight face but Diane smirking made me laugh and spoiled the effect.

"Oh, James left a note for you." She picked up a sheet of paper from her desk and handed it to me.

"Labkit are offering us prices and delivery times that the others would be pushed to beat. Should I order from them?"

"Tell him to see what Southern Lab Supplies can offer for the same order, they should be able to give him a price and delivery time this afternoon." She went off to do so and I went into my office and sent Danni a text, How's the leg? Mum x.

I should be used to it by now but it still gives me a buzz to sign myself Mum or Mummy, as I never thought I'd ever have that chance, it's therefore a matter I take very seriously. That I have photos of my children and Simon on my desk, at which I was staring, possibly shows that, or it does to me. I also have the picture of Billie in my diary and I still miss her. I was looking at this when Diane barged in.

"Oops, sorry, boss, James said he'd do that immediately. "More tea?"

I looked up and said, "No, I'm going to take a little walk, I could do with some fresh air, so field any calls for me, will you?"

"Of course, you feeling all right?"

"Yeah, I'll be okay in a few minutes, won't be long."

"Why don't you take her a few flowers, you know she loves them?"

"Yeah, good idea, I'll see you tomorrow, anytime after twelve?"

"Great, go on, go." She picked up my jacket and my bag and handed them to me. I shut down my laptop and zipped up the bag. I wandered down to the car and placed everything except my handbag in the boot and drove off to the cemetery, calling at a florist's on the way.

The sun shone on my back as I walked up to the grave, I removed the old flowers which had long since expired and washed out the vase, filled it with water and after slicing off a bit of the stems of the new flowers with my penknife, arranged them in the vase and replaced it in the recess on the gravestone and stood back. I thought they looked lovely, carnations and chrysanthemums. For a split second, I got an image of the three 'inhabitants' of the plot smiling at me. A moment later my phone peeped.

It was Danni, "Painful, why? Oh, she likes the flowers. D XXXX"

I felt a shiver run up and down my spine. It was time to go home and with luck, I should beat both the traffic and the girls, now there's a thought. I'll get a tub of ice cream on the way, that should keep the grumbles to a minimum.