Easy As Falling Asleep.
by Angharad & Winnie the Pooh,
part 26 (and who said it wouldn't last?).
"I don't think I like you Simon," I said to myself. I still had to get home and a lift with him was easier than walking in these boots. They may be comfortable for the moment, but walking a mile in someone else' boots is not recommended by podiatrists, especially ones with three inch heels.
I was trying to think quickly and so far wasn't having much effect, a bit like my cycling. After all my training I was still crap, but better crap than I was before, so it was all relative. If I could get Simon to give me a lift to my flat, change my shoes, grab the bits I needed to borrow the bike and then get him to take me back to the shop, or to the university. I won't go to my lectures but he doesn't know that.
"I don't want you to report Kev, because nothing happened and it would be pure malice on your part."
"Absolutely," nodded Simon, "malice of the purest form. I saw you first, end of story."
"I am not some product on a supermarket shelf, Simon. I'm a woman and I have feelings." I almost simpered at this stage although I knew he wouldn't fall for the old tears trick.
"All of them good, I hope."
"I beg your pardon?" I said in bewilderment.
"Your feelings," he gave me a beaming smile. He was running rings around me and it should have been the other way about. I'm the woman here, supposed to be in charge, wrapping him around my little finger and he does this to me. I'll bet Kev wouldn't do that to me!
I had now forgotten what I was going to say, what item of scintillating wit I had been saving to destroy him. Okay so I'm lying, but he doesn't know that, if all else fails make some disparaging remark about his masculinity.
"What do you care about my feelings?" I came back with a stormer.
"Very much." There was that beaming smile again.
"Very much what?" I asked having forgotten what we were talking about.
"I care very much for your feelings; look Cathy, if you're going to argue with me at least remember what you are saying otherwise it gets very confusing. The way things are going, you'll be attacking my masculinity next. If you do, I could hit back by mentioning the small size of your breasts. But being a gentleman, I wouldn't dream of saying such a thing."
"You just did!" I wailed, folding my arms over my small breasts.
"No sweetie, I said I could not would, say it."
"Could, would, who gives a shit, if my tits are too small why are you wanting to date me anyway, are you into boyish girls, is that it, are you a repressed homosexual?" That should have hit him right between the eyes, lets see him laugh that off, question both his masculinity and his sexuality - both barrels, woooooooo!
To my astonishment Simon roared with laughter. "That is very good Cathy, boyish girls, repressed homosexual, that is so funny."
I stood there absolutely gob-smacked, why isn't he reeling under my deluge of blows, or is he going to laugh himself into a coma?
"Most men I know wouldn't find it very funny," I pouted.
"That's their silly fault then. I can assure you I am a normal, heterosexual bloke, who finds you attractive partly because of your naivete, but also because you are a very pretty girl. Okay, I'd prefer it if you had bigger breasts but it's not that important. I can't help who I fancy, it's all to do with brain chemistry or something. As for the gay sex bit, I had plenty of opportunity at Millfield, believe me, and it wasn't my scene at all."
So he went to a public school, rich bastard! "Did Stella go to a public school as well?" I asked changing the subject for a moment to buy myself some time to think.
"She went to Millfield as well, I hate to think what our education cost my parents, especially with flying lessons and ponies and things."
"So why are you interested in a flat chested prole like me? It amuses you does it, bit of rough?" I felt a bit out of my depth and was hitting out wherever I could, maybe I should just let him report Kev and get the hell out of it? But then I rarely did what was good for me.
"Let's go back to the car, shall we as this is getting rather personal?"
We walked in relative silence back to the Volvo and got into it. "It's limited parking here, so I'm going to drive somewhere with less restrictions and which is a bit quieter, is that okay?"
"I don't know," I mumbled, for all I knew he was going to drive somewhere very quiet and attempt to rape me or worse.
"Is there somewhere you'd prefer to go, bearing in mind that this is costing my bank a couple of million pounds an hour. So sadly, I don't have all day."
"Take me home," I said, shocked by what he had just said, "maybe you'd better go to work and save the economy."
"Not until you promise to come out tomorrow night."
"Let me think about it." I felt very confused, well I didn't really, to go out on any sort of date with a randy bloke was risking being murdered.
"What is there to think about, you have something to wear and it looked fine. I shall collect you and take you back home, your home that is."
"I erm, I don't know Simon." I blushed and was close to tears. I was terrified.
"Look I'm only asking you out for dinner, I'm not asking you to sleep with me or to marry me for God's sake."
"I don't do sex on a first date," I said, which was true, never having had sex, it had to be. "And last night doesn't count as a date." I covered myself there.
"Despite finding you extremely attractive, I don't actually know whether I'd want sex with you anyway," he said diffidently.
"Why? What's wrong with me? Tits too small, is that it?" I shrieked. I was disgusted.
Comments
Out of sort, out of sequence
Silly sod, er sister, you've got the chapters (or is it the numbers) out of line. Que up, you lot, and count off! (Like me, Cathy is losing her grip!)
Hmmm, does Simon know something?
Karen J.
"Being a girl is wonderful and to torture someone into that would be like the exact opposite of what it's like. I don’t know how anyone could act that way."
College Girl - poetheather
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin
I can count, sort of
I admit I numbered this latest offering 25, then noticed it on posting and changed it. As for the sequencing, I don't do that bit, I just write 'em.
Learned how to spell dummkopf tonight, courtesy of Saphira, now where can I use it?
Angharad 8-)
Angharad
Our latin master ...
... used to call one of my class mates 'kugelkopf' (bullet head, I think) he used to teach German as well. Violence and arrogance were all part of a schoolmaster's armoury in the 1950s :o)
You're free to use that as you wish - copyright free lol
G
Missing violence and arrogance
The latest generation of teachers seem very wimpish in comparison. I am all for a little violence and arrogance if it results in things getting taught, and remaining taught.
My children, who benefit from an expensive liberal education, seem to learn nothing, whilst I, who was beaten regularly, know a lot.
Hugs,
Fleurie
Simon is to Cathy as ...
... Richard is to Christina, maybe worse. What a sleeze!
"All the world really is a stage, darlings, so strut your stuff, have fun, and give the public a good show!" Miss Jezzi Belle at the end of each show
BE a lady!
I don't know
about that Jezzi. Simon seems more manic than predatory like Richard. Both of them are intense but of the two Simon seems less likely than Richard to go over the line. Neither one knows what NO means but Richard definitely would have the alarm bells ringing. Simon is more like a overeager hound, but Richard is a wolf. Not a clue if any of what I just wrote makes any sense what so ever but it's Sunday what do you expect? :)
hugs!
grover
Comparing this to being Christina Chase
I really don't see any comparison Christina is supposed to be a heterosexual male who happens to fall into being mistaken for a female and slowly becoming more of one as he discovers things he likes about being female.Cathy is transexual and has been taking hormones but has been maybe some what asexual till now and closeted.Comparing characters Richard comes across as the more experienced predatory master of women (jerk).While Simon to me comes across as a more normal maybe overly self confident kinda guy.Richard and the tow truck driver to me is a better comparison.Good job again Angarad and as always I'll be looking forward to the next installment.Amy
Great double-clicker
The story, thus far, has been a great double-clicker. I would be a page-turner, but being on the computer changes things. Please keep writing. I think Simon needs to get a bike, go on some rides, and get whipped good and proper.
School confusion
Quoting the story: "So he went to a public school, rich bastard!"
I'm a bit confused here. Aren't PUBLIC schools supposed to be for the poor masses and PRIVATE schools for the rich elite ?
Hugs,
Kimby
Hugs,
Kimby
Private is public
Private schools are called public schools. I am not sure why this is though. Possibly because originally they were founded as grammar schools in the 1500's for the less well-to-do, poverty being, then as now, relative.
Some of these grammar schools remained non fee paying, but most of these were abolished in the name of equality some fifty years ago.
In the name of freedom of choice, the fee paying ones were allowed to remain and continue to prosper today. Largely because there are now so very few free ones
The poor masses attend state schools in deprived areas which reflect their poverty and fulfill the useful role of helping them to come to terms with their inadequacy and lack of future. There exist many good state schools if you are rich enough to live in a wealthy catchment area which thus allows you the freedom of choice of not having to pay even more to send your offspring to a fee paying/public/private school.
If you are confused by the logic of the above, do not despair. I am also, and we are in good company.
It was Matthew Arnold who was largely instrumental in starting the starting the concept and the original seven public schools, those who went to them would claim they are still the only, were Charterhouse, Eton, Harrow, Rugby, Shrewsbury, Westminster and Winchester. which were all boys' boarding schools, together with two day schools, Merchant Taylors' and St Paul's.
Previously it had not been deemed necessary to educate the aristocracy as they they had no real use for learning, discipline etc., but, should they by some strange quirk of circumstance require knowledge they could always hire some one who had it. Or more likely instruct someone to hire someone who had it.
In Victoria's time however they started to send their sons to the new public schools probably out of curiosity, or it may just have been the fashionable thing to do, or they may have found it an ideal, and relatively cheap way, of getting them out of their hair. It was then of course that the previously free or charitable schools started to charge.
Later on, when the fad for educating girls took hold of society, various girls' schools were founded. Nowadays regrettably most schools are no longer single-sex and the biology curriculum is not limited to experimenting on dead frogs.
I hope that tells you more than you ever wanted to know about the English Educational system.
The Scottish one is quite different of course.
Hugs,
Fleurie
Public v Private schools
Public schools in the UK have a long history and include the famous ones like Eton, Harrow, and Rugby (of Tom Brown's Schooldays fame). They are all fee paying, and very expensive. They are 'Public' as opposed to having the private tutors that the aristocracy used to favour. They have little to do with the Grammar schools of the mid 20th century, which were open to all after passing an exam at the age of 11.
The main problem with grammar schools was the so-called Secondary Moderns for the 'failures'. The latter is the inevitable twin of the former and were designed to create the coal mine/factory fodder of my generation. I was fortunate enough to 'pass' the 11+ and went to Grammar school (only 10% passed the exam). Unfortunately I wasn't considered Oxford material and so was largely ignored by the masters (who strode round the place wearing gowns) and left at 16 to continue my education at night school whilst working. You will gather that I'm not a fan of either Public or Grammar schools :)
Geoff
Tripartite System
The 1944 Education Act intended to create three separate types of schools (large portions of subsequent text ripped from Wikipedia):
* Grammar schools were intended to teach a highly academic curriculum, teaching students to deal with abstract concepts. There was a strong focus on intellectual subjects, such as literature, classics and complex mathematics. In addition to wholly state-funded grammar schools, a number of schools currently receiving state grants could become direct grant grammar schools, with some pupils funded by the state and the rest paying fees.
* Secondary technical schools were designed to train children adept in mechanical and scientific subjects. The focus of the schools was on providing scientists, engineers and technicians.
* Secondary modern schools (secondary intermediate schools in Northern Ireland) would train pupils in practical skills, aimed at equipping them for less skilled jobs and home management.
It was intended for all three branches of the system to have a parity of esteem. The appropriate type of school for each student would be determined by their performance in an examination taken in the final year of primary school.
-oOo-
But of course, that's not how things turned out. As ever, although the idea sounded good on paper, it failed to take into account public attitudes (Grammars already existed and entry was based on passing a test - so they were already viewed as "the best") and a severe lack of resources to invest in building up the two new school types. So most of the money went into the grammars, the secondary moderns were largely neglected and the technical schools largely failed to materialise.
Very few technical schools were opened, due to the lack of money and a shortage of suitably qualified teachers. This failure to develop the technical part of the system undermined the whole structure. The tripartite system was, in effect, a two-tier system with grammar schools for the academically gifted and secondary modern schools for the others. Grammar schools received the lion's share of the money, Modern schools were correspondingly neglected.
-oOo-
However, although the system was later abolished, several local authorities rebelled, and as a result there are still 164 state-run grammars, although the 'ordinary' comprehensive schools are not viewed with the same disdain as their predecessors. And courtesy of reforms by successive governments, you've now got CTCs and Academies in the mix... effectively free, non-selective independent schools (i.e. they are not bound by the National Curriculum or nationally agreed pay scales and conditions of service) that are highly favoured by both parties - especially the Blue Party, who'd like to see most schools convert to this format.
--Ben
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
Winnie
Leigh Richards
I think Winnie did a marvelous job of this chapter. Does he share your mail account? I really have to talk to him about those honey stains all over the 100 acre woods!!!
Keep up the great work. Sasha and I are really enjoying this story.:-)
Leigh
Leigh Richards
Just having Wee Re-read, Angharad..
Near the start of chapter 26 I think, you wrote of a podiatrist with 3 inch heels. I once had to give a lecture at a meeting of such people and they all wore flatties - many the then popular Clark's Earth Shoes, that looked like they were on the wrong feet!
Briar
Briar
Cornish pasty shoes
They were very popular although I've never worn them - I don't remember mentioning a podiatrist in 3" heels - although I have worn several of those (3" heels); probably Bonzi wrote that bit.
Angharad
Angharad
Get a grip girl
You're going from one mood to another in instant! But it is funny! :)
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
I suspect
From her behavior he doesn't doubt there is anything different even a little. Volatile and hot tempered, all classic signs for males to duck and cover for a few days, but since he is basically wooing her this is not an option. That and his ego is pure teflon, nothing sticks.
Too funny. But I can't follow
Too funny. But I can't follow the other comments, my head is spinning.