Working Girl 14

By

Susan Brown

1.

I heard a beep, beep sound.

It was annoying me. I just wanted to sleep and it just kept going on and on.

Beep, beep, beep…

It was no good, I couldn’t sleep.

I opened tried to open one eye and it felt gummy and sticky so I tried the other…the same. I then felt the pain in my leg.

I groaned as the pain intensified.

I heard the sound of feet walking across the floor coming towards me. Then I felt a cool damp cloth or something being wiped across my eyes.

‘Hi, honey, woken up at last?’

I prised my eyes open. I had recognised that voice, it was Sheila!

I opened my eyes, it was a bit bleary, but I could see Sheila in her nurses’ uniform leaning over me with a sort of worried smile on her face.

‘Sheila,’ I croaked, ‘what happened. Where am I?’

‘In hospital.’

‘Why/’

‘Don’t you remember?’

No, yes, I don’t know. Didn’t we have a pizza?’

‘Don’t you remember what happened after that?’

‘No?’

I tried to lift my head off the pillow but for some reason I couldn’t. It felt too heavy and I was quite frankly, knackered.

‘Don’t try to do anything. Look, you got knocked over by a taxi.’

‘It wasn’t a black BMW, was it?’

‘No, it was yellow and had taxi written all over it. Who ever heard of a black BMW taxi anyway?’

I changed the subject.

‘Am I very ill?’ I said in my best claustrophobic voice.

‘Well, you have a hairline fracture and a number of traumatic abrasions and contusions to the left tibia. In addition to this, you have had further contusions and abrasions to you left elbow and forehead which in turn has led to concussion, blurred vision and other small things that the doctor will discuss with you.’

My God, that sounded serious!

‘What was all that in English?’

You’ve got a broken leg, some scratches and some bumps.’

‘Will I live?’

‘Probably, as long as you don’t walk into any more cars.’

‘I hurt all over, especially my leg’

‘I’ll see if you can have any more pain killers. Don’t go away.’

She moved out of my eyesight.

I tried to lift my head again and managed to have a look at where I was before dropping down again, shutting my eyes.

I noticed that I was wearing a hospital gown, washed out pink in colour. My leg was raised a bit and covered in a pressure bandage. I could see my painted toes sticking out beyond where the bandage finished. I had another bandage on my left arm and a few bruises and scratches in various places.

The room was a sort of sickly green colour with a clock ticking loudly on the wall in front of me. The floor was the same colour and looked so shiny that people could break bones if they slipped on it. Still, at least they would be in the right place to fix it. To the side was an informative poster warning me of the dire consequences of unprotected sex.

The hospital room was one of those single ones where people with dreadful infectious diseases or enough money to bribe the sister went.

As I had no money, my brain went into fifth gear and then overdrive.

Perhaps I was infectious. I had heard of MRSA like everyone else. Maybe I caught it somehow when I was admitted and they had to put me out of the way of healthy people so they didn’t catch it. Perhaps I was on my last legs and Sheila was keeping it away from me, being all brave and everything.

My vivid imagination ran wild. Thinking about how my funeral was going to be and how all the flowers should be distributed to orphanages.

I could just see all my new workmates and Sheila, looking down at my grave.

I shuddered as in my minds eye I could see the odious Davis, wearing his best greasy shirt and jeans throwing a singe red plastic rose on my coffin as I…….

‘Wake up, Toni.’

My eyes snapped open. Sheila was back.

‘Let me help you take these,’ she said holding out a couple of pills in a paper cup.

With difficulty, I downed the pills and then took a sip of water to wash them down with.

‘Sheila.’

‘Yes, honey?’

‘You would tell me if I was desperately ill and had MRSA or something wouldn’t you?’

‘You haven’t, but of course I would tell you. What put that into your head?’

‘Well, I’ve been put into a single room.’

‘So?’

‘I saw on that hospital soap the other day, what was it called? Oh yes, Casualty that they put people with unmentionable nasty problems or infections in single rooms. I suspect because they don’t want to upset normal unhealthy patients.’

‘Crap.’

‘Pardon.’

‘Well, you don’t actually believe what you see on the telly, do you?’

‘Well…’

‘Don’t be silly. No the reason why you are here is that you have a willy.’

I could feel my face go red.

‘Willy?

‘Yes that thing that dangles between your legs and gets caught up in zips, technically called a penis and…’

‘I know what a willy is, I’m not stupid. Why have I been put in here because of my willy?’

‘Well, on admission, the nurses that cared for you noticed that you were wearing girls’ clothes when physically you vaguely resemble the male species.’

I went redder.

‘Oh….My…God…!’

‘What’s wrong?’

‘They all know.’

‘Know what?’

‘That I am a boy.’

‘After all you have told me and they way you have been dressing lately, not forgetting the way you look, do you consider yourself a boy or girl?’

‘Um…a girl, I suppose.’

‘That’s what I think. Anyway, I was way too upset to be coherent when they rushed you to hospital, so I didn’t have a chance to talk to the nurses and doctors about you. The admissions policy here is that if you are dressed as a woman but have the physical attributes of a man or visa versa, they will try to put you into an individual room until you are able to tell them your preferences.’

‘That’s very PC of them.’

‘Well, possibly, but I think it was more to do with the unfortunate incident of the patient admitted whilst unconscious wearing some knickers under his jeans and stained brown coat.’

‘What happened?’

‘They put him in a female ward, thinking that was a good idea, not realising that he was a pantie fetishist who liked to pinch girls’ knickers off the line and wear them and then flash people at random.’

‘Yuk! What happened?’

‘When he woke up, he evidently though that he had died and gone to heaven. He started drooling and hyperventilating. He nearly had a heart attack at the site of all that female flesh. They sedated him and got him out of there fast.’

‘So they think that I’m kinky, now!’

‘No, silly. I had a word with the ward sister and she knows your situation.’

‘So she thinks that I AM a weirdo who likes dressing up as a girl!’

‘No, you silly moo. She knows that you are transgendered and they are OK with that. You would be surprised at the amount of people who come to A&E who crossdress at least under their male outer clothing. What I am saying is that it takes a lot to shock a nurse and you or anyone else wearing knickers would not even score 1 on the Richter scale.’

‘So they don’t think that I’m a sick weirdo like that flasher then?’

‘No, if anything, when they undressed you, they were surprised at the package in your panties.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Let’s put it this way, you look very convincing as a GG.’

‘GG.’

‘Genuine girl.’

‘Mmm you seem to know a lot.’

‘Well, when you went all girly on me, I asked around, looked at the internet and found out a lot about girls like you.’

‘You mean that there are others like me? Hang on a minute, when I went all girly on you! You were the one to push me into this!’

‘Never mind all that. You must have heard of cross dressing before you got into a dress?’

‘Well yes, I suppose so.’ I said yawning, ‘I thought that people who did that were drag artists like Danny La Rue. Remember, I led a bit of a sheltered life, up until I was chucked out of home and I got to know you.’

‘I think I’ve been insulted there, but never mind, I’ll save breaking your other leg until next time. Anyway, the pills I gave you obviously have made you sleepy, so I go now and come back tomorrow. Bye love.’

She bent over and kissed my cheek and left the room.

I yawned again, realised that the pain had faded somewhat and before I knew it I was asleep.

2.

I was on this jumbo jet and it was taking off. I was wearing a yellow strappy sun dress and white sandals.

I was strapped in the seat and quite frankly I was petrified.

I am not a good flyer. I had only been in an aircraft once before and I was terrified. We had been landing in Malaga and the pilot decided to land it in a pothole. We bounced so much on landing, I was physically sick on my Dad. He was not pleased; it was his best Hawaiian shirt that got gooed on.

Anyway, back to the jumbo. We had just had a lecture from the stewardess about how, if we crashed and somehow survived, we had to put on a lifejacket, be all brave and not panic. (as if!).

I gripped the armrest like there was no tomorrow I could feel the sick coming up. My eyes were tightly shut. The roar got louder as the engines seemed to want to tear away from the wings. I grabbed the person next to me and screamed as I opened my eyes and saw the odious Davis leering at me. He had my dads’ Hawaiian shirt on, though it was covered in stains of a dubious nature, I still recognised it. He was leering at me and said something over the screech of those damned engines. The smell of his breath nearly made me swoon.

‘It’s alright love, I will protect you. After all, you are my wife and can’t wait to get you into bed in our luxury caravan at Skegness.’

I shuddered in horror and shut my eyes again. I tried to get away from him as he pawed me in a disgusting reptilian manner. The engines got louder and louder and I got more panicky.

Suddenly, I was tapped on the shoulder.

I jumped as I opened my eyes. I saw that I was in bed and I was obviously not in a jumbo. My memory came back with a rush. I was in hospital! I breathed a sigh of relief as I realised that I had bean having a nightmare. I was tapped on the shoulder again. I looked up and saw that it was a hospital worker, she looked as knackered as I felt. Perhaps it had been a long shift.

‘You awake, love?’

‘I am now.’

‘Sorry I can’t hear you. I’ll turn of the floor cleaner.’

She flipped a switch and the engine like sound went and it was quiet again.

‘That’s better. Did I wake you, dear?’

‘Oh, that’s all right, I was having a bad dream anyway.’

‘I just wanted to know if you were a private patient. If you are then I’ll go and do another room.’

‘No I’m National Health.’

‘That’s OK then.’

I looked at the clock on the wall. It was 5.30am!

She switched on the floor cleaner again and I tried to block out the noise by putting a pillow over my head.

Eventually she was finished and then it was quiet. I had just nodded off and then there was an almighty crash just outside my door. It sounded like someone had dropped a dozen bedpans.

I looked at the clock. It was 5.45am.

When my heart stopped galloping I drifted off to sleep…only to be woken up by a bang on the door and a trolley being pushed through the door.

‘Breakfast time.’ said the woman with a toothy grin and a sort of net hat thingy on her head.

I looked at the clock, it was 6.02am.

‘Cornflake, boiled egg and toast do ya love?’

‘I’m not hungry.’

‘Ooh you got to eat dear or they will give you an enema.’

‘Cornflakes please.’

‘Cup of Rosy Lee?’

‘Pardon?’

Tea, love, Cup of tea?’

‘Um, yes please.’

She slopped the tea down on a sort of wheeled tray thingy and then put a few cornflakes and a small puddle of milk in a bowl and then pushed the whole thing in front of me.

‘Get that down you quickly, dear. Its ward rounds soon.’

Before I could say thank you she was out of the door and tearing down the corridor waking up some other poor devil.

I swallowed the cardboard cornflakes and tepid milk and then washed that down with the tea. I think it was tea. To be honest, it tasted like dishwater.

I pushed the tray away and shut my eyes again. I was still dog tired, probably the effects of the accident and pills.

I drifted off to dreamland… only to be woken up AGAIN by the door being crashed open.

Suddenly I was surrounded by a gaggle of people in white coats.

The eldest one; a man with white hair and half moon glasses said. ‘Sorry to wake you up. How do you feel?’

‘Tired.’

‘Yes that’s to be expected. Let’s have a look at you then.’

He poked and prodded me, asked if this that and the other hurt and then said to one of the other white coats, ‘Got the x ray handy, Andy?’

They all went over to other side of the room switched on a white panel and pushed the x ray up against it.

‘Hmm,’ he said, ‘What do you think of that?’

‘A clear hairline fracture to the left tibia, Sir,’ said a junior white coat.

‘Do you all agree?’

There were a series of nods and yeses.

‘Bloody idiots. God help the National Health Service if you lot are a prime example of the new doctors we are getting now!’

He pulled the x ray away from the panel, turned it over and blew on it, then he put it back on the panel.

‘Now, do you still think that it’s a fracture?’

There was series of shaking heads and no’s.

The doctor came back over to me and said.’ Well my dear, my colleagues are in agreement now that you do not have a broken leg, just a few cuts bruises and a bit of swelling. You can go home in a few hours . If you get any headaches or feel sick, call your doctor straight away.’

‘What about the broken leg?’

‘It was a hair on the x ray.’

‘Oh.’

With that the doctors left.

It was 6.45am.

I went back to sleep.

3.

I woke up with a jolt to someone plopping a wet sponge on my face and washing me vigorously.

‘Sorry, love, did I wake you?’

I tried to answer but as my mouth was full of sponge and soap, the swear word never came out.

I felt like a car. You know, when you stop at a traffic light and some oik comes up to your car, washes the windscreen at an incredibly quick pace then demands money with menaces.

Before I knew it, the nurse was gone, leaving me clean, but still slightly soggy around the edges.

It was 6.58am and I was beginning to hate that bloody clock.

The ticking of the clock helped me drift off to sleep.

I dreamt that I was at a ball. It was being held at a stately home. I was in the ball room with what appeared to be hundreds of other gaily dressed people.

I looked down at myself.

I was wearing a long white sequined ball gown. It had a flattering slight V shape to the bodice section, with two layers of taffeta and chiffon over the skirt. It was sequined and had beading to the front. The dress was strapless and flowed down my body, fitting me to perfection and making me look pretty, slim and vibrant. The dress came with long matching gloves, which complimented the dress to perfection. I could feel myself restricted by a boned corset but not uncomfortably so. I could feel that my legs were encased in a sheath of fine silk stockings, held up with suspenders attached to the corset. I was wearing white court shoes studded with diamonds and with ridiculously high heels.

My bosom was heaving with excitement as I was being led around the dance floor by a handsome man in evening dress. He was drop dead gorgeous and I could feel the juices wetting my panties in anticipation of the night ahead.

I could see in the various mirrors dotted about the room as we waltzed past, my long blond hair, piled on top of my head and held in place by a tiara of silver and diamonds.

The smile on my face said it all. I was in love.

The dance finished and he led me out onto the terrace. It was quieter and cooler out there. The stars were shining in the clear sky. The moon was full as we looked over the lake to the valley beyond.

I looked up at him, my lips, slightly sticky and sweet from my lipstick parted as his head came closer and closer. I could see his liquid blue eyes and I felt as if I was floating on air as he came closer and closer.

Our lips met and opened in unison as his wonderful tongue probed deliciously in my waiting and eager mouth; our tongues entwined in a lovers’ embrace that excited me to the depth of my being….

Then I woke up to find a hard thermometer in my mouth and a nurse taking my pulse.

‘Sorry dear, did I wake you up?’

I was too upset to speak. The dream was too real. What the hell was going on? Do I fancy men now?

The nurse finished what she was doing and was off again, leaving me somewhat upset as I realised that I felt uncomfortably sticky and damp down below. I felt under the covers. Yup, it had happened. I had orgasmed in my sleep, dreaming about french kissing a man!

I looked at that sodding clock, still bloody ticking away, it was 7.20am.

I stayed awake then. Not daring to fall asleep. Time ticked past slowly as things quietened down.

I wondered how soon I could leave hospital. I was waiting for someone to come back and give me the final release from this hell hole and then I could go.

Sheila popped in at 10.am carrying a small case.

‘Hi Toni, having a nice rest.’

‘Grrr.’

‘Now, now, don’t be like that. I heard from Peter that you haven’t got a broken leg after all.’

‘Peter?’

‘The doctor who examined you.’

‘Oh.’

‘He said that there was no reason why you can’t go home and as I have finished my shift. I’m here to help you get dressed.’

‘Thank God for that.’

‘Why, haven’t you had a nice rest?’

‘Don’t ask.’

To be continued….