By

For some reason, Mr Percy was dancing rumbas in my panties, trying to break free from its nylon prison. I could not believe that I was the same person.

'Wow.' I said with awe.

As I looked at my new self, I realized that I was the spitting image of my mother. OK not exactly, but probably when she was a girl about my age. My mum always dressed young and could have been my older sister in the photo I have on my shelf in the flat.

I realised that to see my mother, all I needed to do was look in the mirror. I was part of her as she was part of me. From that time on, I felt better about my mother. I had lost her but I had many happy memories of her and also my great dad that I could draw on and treasure.

'Well sweetie what do you think?'

I looked at myself again and said, 'thank you Sheila you have helped make me feel a lot better today.'

'Oh sucks to that. Do you think that you can swing it?'

'Swing what?'

'The interview, silly!'

'What interview?'

'With McClarens, of course!'

Lord, I had forgotten that!

'Oh that again, I'll never get away with it. Remember I'm a boy not a girl!'

'Look again, Toni. I see a pretty no lets change that, a drop dead gorgeous girl, in the mirror, don't you?'

'Yes, I know I look nice but you can't be serious!'

'I am Toni, very serious. You look like a real girl. There's no reason
why you can't go to that interview and get the job.'

All my doubts came flooding back, big time.

'It's weird and kinky. I'll get locked up or something. It's all right
doing this in my own flat or yours, but it's a different matter trying to pretend to be a girl in front of other people. Anyway, what about women's intuition. I thought you girls had a sixth sense or something. Any girl or man for that matter would see through me straight away.'

Sheila looked at me and then said, 'You look like a girl, with your soft voice you sound like a girl. Unless they know you're not, then you will get away with it. Walk about a bit again, let's see if we can get you to walk like a girl naturally, so you don't even think about it.'

I reluctantly walked up and down on my now aching feet, once again trying to imagine the way a girl would walk.

Sheila laughed at me!

'You've forgotten all I showed you. Oh, Toni, women don't walk in a mincing way like that. Let me show you again.'

She walked up and down until I could see what she was getting at. Small steps and swing slightly at the hips, not wildly like I had been doing.

I tried again. I found it hard to get used to the damned shoes. They had a 3 inch heel and much higher than I was used to and they were a lot narrower than anything I had ever worn. My feet felt a bit pinched. However, I walked up and down, up and down until Sheila was satisfied I was doing OK.

I sat back down on the bed and Sheila immediately said, 'look at your
legs!'

I looked down and didn't see anything wrong.

'Your knees silly, you can see right up your knickers!'

I blushed deeply and shut my legs quickly.

'Sorry.' I mumbled. 'being a girl is bloody hard work.'

'Look honey, you will have to try to remember, think girl, not boy.
Small steps when you walk and sway your hips very slightly. When you sit down always put your knees together. Oh, and don't forget to smooth your dress under you as you sit. That would be a dead give away. Speak softly in a slightly higher key. Use your hands more when you talk. You men lack expression, we women move our hands and arms about when we speak, God knows why, but we do. Have you got all that?'

I tried to take it in but I couldn't believe that I would get away with
it. To say I lacked confidence would be an understatement.

Sheila saw that I wasn't convinced about all this.

'Ok honey, desperate measurements are called for.'

I looked at her with foreboding. What was this insane woman going to
suggest next?

'Are you hungry,' she asked.

I hadn't eaten much in the past few days. It was a bit difficult with
my income or lack of it.

'I'll eat later.'

'When did you last have a decent meal?'

'I don't know, yesterday, maybe.'

'Oh you poor thing. I have an idea. Let's go to McDonalds.'

'I can't afford it.'

'Don't worry, its my treat. You can pay me back with your first pay
packet.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes I'm sure.'

'Well, thanks Sheila. I'll just get changed and then we'll go.'

'Hang on a minute. You are going dressed as you are.'

'NO!'

'Don't worry, we'll go across town. No one will know you and it will
be great practice for your big day.'

'I can't! I will be found out and arrested or something.'

'You won't be arrested silly. Look at yourself, be honest. Do you look
like a girl or a boy?'

I reluctantly went over to the mirror again and looked at myself as if
I was looking at someone else. There was no denying it, I didn't look
like a boy dressed up. I looked like a teenage girl and a pretty one at
that! And yet I still felt that it was wrong to be like this. Years of prejudice against men being dressed as women and of trying to be
'manly' as I was supposed to be, left a mark that was hard to eradicate.

Sheila came up behind me and gave me a hug.

'I know how you feel honey. It's hard, I realize that. Just remember,
we are going somewhere that you never need go to again. If you are
caught out, no one will ever recognize you dressed as a boy. Believe
me honey, I have been a girl all my life and I have to tell you, if I
didn't know you as a boy I wouldn't think twice about what or who you
are. If you pull this off, you will have all the confidence you need for your interview.'

I stood there looking at the girl in the mirror. Suddenly, I didn't
worry any more. I had been through so much in my short life. It was
about time I started making things happen for me instead of waiting for
something to turn up. It was probably just bravado or the onset of me
going nuts, but I looked at Sheila and just said, 'OK, lets do it.'

Sheila found a tailored cream jacket from her things and I put
it on as it was a bit chilly outside. I followed her out of the flat and
as I walked down the stairs, I marvelled at the cool silky feeling of
the dress and slip brushing against my legs. Even though I was wearing nylons, I felt a bit naked to say the least. Conflicting emotions of fear and pleasure alternated as I went out of the front door and got
into Sheila's car.

Luckily, the street was empty apart from old Mrs. Jones across the
street who was chucking her cat out for the night.

'You OK honey?' said Sheila as she started the car.

'I'm not sure about this.'

'You are doing great. Mrs. Jones across the road didn't look shocked
when she saw you, did she?'

'No, that's because she's as blind as a bat.'

'Come on Toni, you are doing great. Just sit back and relax. What have you got to loose?'

'Nothing I suppose.'

Sheila leaned forward and put the radio on and suddenly we both laughed as we heard the familiar song 'Pretty Woman' coming from the speakers.

'That's a good omen,' laughed Sheila.

'I hope so!'

In no time at all, we arrived at McDonalds.

There were lots of people coming and going and the drive through was doing a roaring trade.

We parked as near as possible to the entrance and got out of the car.
I felt the wind in my hair and it felt strange as it blew across my
face. I had to hold my dress down as I was in danger of doing a Marilyn Monroe with it. My heart was pounding hard as we walked towards the brightly lit entrance. Sheila put her arm through mine for support. I was shivering and it wasn't just because I was cold. I was grateful that she was with me. There was no way I would have done this by myself.

'Stand tall honey, remember you are a lovely girl.'

We walked through the entrance and over to the counter.

'Hello ladies, how can I help you?'

The boy in the silly hat and uniform sounded so chirpy he must have
been eating birdseed.

'Big Mac and cola please for me and what would you like Toni?'

'Same please,' I whispered.

'Speak up honey I couldn't hear you.'

I cleared my throat nervously and said, in what sounded like Mini
Mouse's voice, 'same as you please.'

The boy behind the counter smiled and said, 'coming up ladies.'

As he was loading our trays, he was looking me up and down and to say the least I was somewhat uncomfortable. Had he seen through my disguise?

In no time we had our meal trays and after a cheery, 'have a nice day,'
from the acne ridden boy, who either had something in his eye or was
winking at me, we headed towards the comparative safety of a corner
table.

My shoes were starting to make my feet ache again.

'Remember small steps. You're a girl now,' whispered Sheila out of the corner of her mouth.

I shortened my step, imagining that everyone was looking at this kinky
boy dressed up as a girl.

Just before we reached the safety of our corner seat, a small brat of a
child decided to throw a tantrum. He/she screamed at the top of its
voice and threw its tray onto the floor. On the tray was a Big Mac and
it sort of exploded as it hit the ground. In the burger was a thin
green slice of pickle. The orphan pickle departed from the burger and
landed on the floor, my shoe landed on it a micro second later.

Before I knew it, I was doing a summersault in the air and landed on my backside.

Sheila screamed, the child (little sod!) screamed and I screamed.

Suddenly, I was surrounded by strangers, all looking down at me.

I closed my legs and tried to get up but unfortunately, on the tray had
been some pink milk shake laughingly and inaccurately called strawberry. This had leaked out of the cup and spread a thin film over the floor. I slipped again on the sloppy concoction and landed on my scantily clad rear end. I looked up at everyone staring at me. Everyone looked down at me spread-eagled on the floor covered in cold pink milkshake. I felt numb, wet, cold and thoroughly pissed off. I just gave up. Here I was, in the middle of McDonalds, dressed as a girl and surrounded by people who any second now were going to get the shock of their lives.

God knows why, probably hysteria, but I started laughing. Somehow, my mind went over and over that damned song 'Pretty Woman'.

If only Roy Orbison could see me now!

To be continued?