Part 6 of 29

Wednesday, July 3
Nothing much to write about lately. Since last Friday night I know that Grandpa and Eve are comfortable with me dressed up so I haven't been watching the clock and changing before they get home. It feels like family, even more so than my own family. I love Mom and Dad, and even my little sister, and they love me, but there is a wonderful feeling of acceptance here. I don't have to watch myself to avoid a lecture on God's will if I do something Dad doesn't approve of.

Not that Grandpa, or Eve for that matter, is a pushover. They don't hesitate to tell you if they are upset, but they don't get upset about much. The don't hesitate to give advice, but it really is advice. Eve has been great in helping me learn to be a lady.

We were in the spare room and Eve was helping me pick out what I would wear tomorrow. Tomorrow the Liar's Club was going to have their annual 4th of July bash. They rent a boat and throw a gala dinner party on the river, then watch the fireworks.

I was very excited, this would be my first formal occasion and I wanted it to be perfect. Mary Ann had plucked my eyebrows (ouch!) and I wished I could have my ears pierced so I could wear earrings, but until I'm done with school I have to live with Dad. Can't let my hair grow long, either. I was trying on several possibilities but nothing really seemed to work for all of us. I was surprised when Grandpa knocked on the door. I quickly put on my robe and he came in.

"Can I make a suggestion?" we all chorused assent. "Perhaps we should rely on Sylvia's judgement. She had one special dress she always wore to the 4th of July dinner, claimed it enhanced her powers of fabrication. Knowing how women hate to wear the same dress to a party over and over, she must have really believed it enhanced her creativity. Considering that Angel's appearance will be the ultimate in fabrication I think it would be appropriate to wear it."

He looked through the closet and came out with a wonderful satin dress. "Go ahead and try it on, Angel."

I hesitated for a moment, I was so far into being a girl I actually was shy about taking off my robe in front of a man! Grandpa must have figured it out because he handed the dress to Mary Ann and turned around to let me put the dress on. Mary Ann helped me and I turned to the mirror.

What I saw was incredible. The young woman in the mirror wore a beautiful hunter green party dress. It had a lavishly embroidered square neckline that was high enough so I didn't have to worry about my lack of cleavage. Two lines of white embroidery ran from the shoulder straps to the waist, drawing attention to the swell of my bust. The bodice (see - I'm even learning the right names to call things) was covered by embroidered circles connected with intricate crosses, giving a rather Irish impression. The skirt was very full, with a layer of shear fabric covering the satin underneath, and extended not quite to my calves. Sylvia must have worn some pretty high heels with this one.

A short cape of the same filmy material that swirled around the skirt extended to my hips and swayed as I moved back and forth to examine myself in the mirror. I heard Grandpa sigh and when I looked he was holding Eve very tightly. There was a look on his face I have trouble describing: sadness, memory, wonder, joy. I couldn't help it, I ran to them and hugged them as tightly as I could. I suppose a real girl would have kissed him but I just couldn't do that, at least not yet.

"Thank you, Grandpa, it's beautiful! I wish I could have met Sylvia, she must have been a wonderful woman. I'll try my best to make you and her proud of me tomorrow. And thank you Eve, I can't tell you how much it means to me that you both have let me do this."

I felt Mary Ann's hand around my shoulders and she joined our circle. I hugged them all with a fervor I have never known before.

"I love you all! My own family could never understand this, I don't think I would be allowed in the house if they ever found out. God must have led me to you, because I feel more welcome in your home than I have ever felt before."

I really hated to take the dress off, but I didn't want to mess it up before the party tomorrow.

The shower just shut off, so I'm going to bed. I can hardly wait for tomorrow!
 

Friday July 4
Well, technically it's the 5th, but since I haven't been to bed it still feels like the 4th. I'm amped, high as a kite, and just a little bit buzzed. Somehow the Liar's Club doesn't pay much attention to the legal drinking age and I had a drink or two tonight.

I enjoyed being treated as just one of the group. Maybe Dad's training is stronger than I realized or maybe it's because the Liars don't seem to be big drinkers, but I mostly stuck to Pepsi. Mary Ann says a girl had better be careful when she's drinking if she doesn't want to wake up in a strange bed. Actually, I tried not to drink not much, period, because going to the bathroom was a major pain.

Anyway, there's no way I can sleep so I may as well write it all down. It's hard to describe the excitement of getting ready for a big party. Guys have nothing like this, or if we do I haven't heard of it up 'till now.

We started hours before the party began, taking turns in the bathroom and getting ready. It's kind of ironic that now I'm living as a girl I have to shave more often than I did when I was trying to be a guy. I still don't have more than a few hairs on my chin but I sure don't want them to show. When I got back from the bathroom, Mary Ann had laid out my lingerie for me. The black, lacy bra that had come to be my favorite, matching panties, a girdle and real stockings.

Until I had found it in Sylvia's boxes I had never heard of a girdle. Eve tells me they were outlawed by the Geneva Conventions as devices of torture, never to be used by civilized man again - and the world is a better place for it.

Well, I'll have to trust her on that but I wore it tonight because my male body didn't zig in the places the dress zagged. I got shortchanged on the hips a girl needs, so the only option was to fake them.

I suppose since my tits are silicone it's no big deal to have polyester hips. I settled my forms into the bra, rolled the stockings over my legs (what a great feeling!) and stepped into the girdle. It fit snugly around my chest but bagged a bit in the hips.

That's where Mary Ann came in. She took a bag of polyester filling and began to pad my hips ever so carefully, a little bit at a time so it wouldn't look lumpy. I had to work hard to ignore the un-girlish way having her hands under my girdle made me feel.

After a good deal of patting and prodding I had a modest figure and was feeling like I was wrapped in cotton batting. I happily chose to experiment with living life as a girl, but it does seem like a lot of work!

The work wasn't over yet - not by a long shot. Eve had promised to help do a special job with the makeup tonight, so we put on our robes and went to her room. Not even having Grandpa watching could dampen the excitement as I sat down in front of the mirror. I could follow the steps easily now, having done them myself for the last couple of weeks. Wipe clean, foundation, powder, blend, mascara, lipstick. Somehow in Eve's hands the same cosmetics I used produced an entirely different effect. I'll never be beautiful, but my face looked a lot more feminine when she was done. Magic, I guess.

"Earl, hand me the box on the night table, will you?"

He did.

"Angel honey, this is as close to a coming out party as you're likely to get, so Earl and I wanted to do something special for you." She opened the box and took out a new wig. It was almost the color of my own hair, but long enough to reach the middle of my back. She fitted it on my head and began to brush it out. What a feeling, my head gently being tugged backwards as she ran the brush through my new hair! She pulled it back into a pony tail and the fastened it with a polished wood clasp.

I looked in the mirror and was very pleased with what I saw. So was Mary Ann, who applauded Eve's expertise. She practically threw me out of the chair so she could have her turn. I sat on the bed next to Grandpa and watched as she made my beautiful love even more beautiful.

(Hi Mary Ann - I told you that you could read my diary but you're going to have to put up with how I sing your praises!)

I loved the feeling of long hair, the weight of it as I moved my head, the wonderful feeling as it slid across my back.

When we were done we went to our room and I slipped on that marvelous party dress. What was Grandma Sylvia like? I had been wearing her clothes for days now but I haven't had the nerve to ask Grandpa. Eve had talked about her a little, but she still remained a misty figure.

It may be crazy, but sometimes I think her spirit is helping me to be a proper lady. The pictures in the albums show a woman who almost always seems to be laughing. There's one of her with Mary Ann as a baby where she's simply radiating love right through the photograph. I'm really sorry I didn't get to know her, but I'm glad Grandpa found Eve.

I may be doubting much of what I was taught by the church, but they aren't wrong when they say life is a mixture of sadness and joy.

Enough philosophy! Mary Ann put on a pair of killer high heels but I stuck to flats because I'm tall enough without help. They did make her legs look very nice, though. I wrapped a green fringed shawl around my shoulders and was ready.

In the living room I came face to face with Mark Twain. Grandpa was not about to be upstaged by the ladies, and his white suit, pork pie hat and gold tipped cane certainly put him in the Major Leagues in clothing as well as storytelling. This was going to be a great night!
 

We arrived and boarded the boat. It was gaily decked out in red, white and blue bunting (what else?) and more lights than I could count. I felt no hesitation in walking over the gangplank and entering the glass enclosed cabin, I was completely into my role as a debutante. No little devil telling me I was sinning, nothing but the wonderful feeling of walking into a room full of people wearing a beautiful dress. Mary Ann and I were suddenly the focus of attention, being the youngest people in the place.

The Liars Club runs to older men, men for whom the word 'crony' fit perfectly, so anyone under forty would attract attention. Two young women, one of them downright beautiful, brought the proceedings to a halt.

"Dammit Earl! I can hardly wait to hear how you managed to kidnap three of the most beautiful women in the city and drag them to dinner with you, you old dog!"

"Charlie, if you don't break down and get a hearing aid, you deaf old coot, you'll never hear the story unless I shout it in your ear. I am far too dignified a man to do that, it would embarrass my grandchildren."

"Grandchildren? There are some stories too tall for even me to believe!"

I don't know what got into me then. I turned to Grandpa and planted my best kiss on him, the kind that Mary Ann taught me.

"Who is that this nasty old man, Grandpa?

"OLD!?" came his pained reply.

"That, my dear granddaughter, is Charles William Pimm, a certified curmudgeon of the first water. His meager talents barely qualified him to join our august organization, probably the examining committee had pity on his wife. She desperately needs an a few hours each week away from his notable temper. We put up with him at the meetings for her sake."

"Why Grandpa, what a sad story! Perhaps he only needs a little love to become a changed man."

With that I planted a kiss on the very surprised lips of Mr. Pimm, absently wondering if he was as aware of my breasts pressing against him as I was. Taking a step backward I felt the hem of my skirt swirl around my legs. I was hoping I hadn't damaged my makeup as I watched Mr. Pimm very closely for a few seconds.

"Nope, still a frog! Well I tried, Grandpa."

There were maybe forty people in the room and not one of them could hold back their laughter. Poor Mr. Pimm took it very well, sputtering theatrically. After that I was welcomed into the ranks as if I were a long lost sister.

At precisely at 6:00 PM the gangway was raised and we moved out on to the river. I marveled at the luxury, white table linens, sparkling goblets, splendid silver by each plate, waiters in tuxes busily seating the guests. These people really knew how to throw a party!

One of the waiters took my shawl and seated me (cool!) between Mary Ann and Eve and directly across from Mr. And Mrs. Pimm. He turned out to be a very nice man, and his wife was just as nice.

We ate a dinner like I have never had in my life. The appetizer was frog legs (from Calaveras County?), the entrée roast ox (not Babe!) with beans (fe-fi-fo-fum) and apple pie (thanks Johnny!) for dessert. By the time we were finished I was very aware of my girdle and ready to agree wholeheartedly with Eve that they could be classified as instruments of torture!

Dinner dissolved seamlessly into a round of stories as the light faded outside the cabin. Each story inspired another and I enjoyed myself hugely. The only flaw was being unable to hold Mary Ann's hand, but I managed to survive that. I did manage to sneak a kiss when we went into the ladies room together.

Trying to pee without disturbing the padding under my girdle would have made a good story if I had dared to tell it! I did get my turn when someone finished a fish story and gave me an opening to tell Utah Phillips story about shark fishing in the Great Salt Lake. Mary Ann and I have been practicing on each other all week. The hardest part is keeping my voice believable when I got to the exciting part. They all groaned at the punch line so I guess it worked.

It was easy to see how Grandpa got to be the President of the club. As the daylight was fading away he launched into an epic tale of Willie, a soldier in the Great War (That's how he put it). Willie waded through muck, mire, trenches, Germans, and Lord know what else while we tried our best to figure out what the punch line would be so we could shout it out before Grandpa finished. This is considered High Art among the Liars.

All through the story Grandpa sat puffing on his big cigar, emitting clouds of raspberry scented smoke. I found out later there was a button on the thing he pressed to make the smoke. He told me his characterization was blatantly stolen from Hal Holbrook's version of Mark Twain. "Only steal from the best!" was his motto.

I'm not sure how he did it but at just the right moment a tremendous explosion shook the boat and Willie defeated the Kaiser single-handedly. The fireworks had started!

Storytelling was abandoned as we all went outside to watch the show. It was unforgettable, watching the beautiful lights fill the sky as the wind blew through my hair. I clutched my shawl to keep it in place and felt my skirt stream in the light breeze.

The colored light highlighted Mary Ann's face, her beauty distracting me from the glow in the sky. The great booms shook the breast forms in my bra. It was like nothing I have ever felt, at that point I would have gladly become a woman forever, no questions asked, if a genie had offered me the chance. It was only the touch of Mary Ann's hand that reminded me why that would be out of order bigtime. It was dark enough we could hold hands without anyone noticing.

The show ended, as it always does, in a flurry of light and sound, and we headed for the riverbank. Mary Ann and I got the back seat of Grandpa's car and we were comfortably snuggled together on the drive home. The night had been something I would remember for the rest of my life, just about perfect if it wasn't for the one errant thought that crossed my mind. I must have sighed loud enough to be heard.

"Why the sad sigh, Angel? You looked like the happiest girl I have ever seen tonight. I think Sylvia would have appreciated your little scene with Pimm, it was her kind of humor. For a moment it was almost like having her back."

"It's been wonderful, unbelievable. I never thought I could feel so tite, it's absolutely amazing!"

"True, but you didn't answer my question." Trust Grandpa notice that.

"It's just that on Monday the internship starts and I have to go back to being a boy again. I guess it has to end sometime, but I don't want it to!"

He was silent for a moment.

"Granddaughter, have you considered that I am in charge of the internship program at the library? All they know is my granddaughter and her friend Angel will be in the program this summer. No one knows your sex, with that name of yours I would be surprised if anyone who saw it would be expecting a male to show up. It doesn't have to end if you don't want it to."

It doesn't? I guess the Lord really does provide everything you need.