CHAPTER 16
I was back there a week later, leaving Kim to do some extra work with Ruth, and this time Nita was with a middle-aged woman she introduced as Heidi. I stared a little when I heard the name, and she shrugged.

“My Mam was a bit conventional as a girl. I’m just glad it wasn’t Pollyanna. Now, Nita’s been giving me a bit of background, and I have done my own checks. Can I just say one thing before we go on?”

“What do you want to say?”

“Sorry.

That’s all. It does, however, give me some idea of why you are doing this. Anyway, nothing on the CRB checks—er, criminal records and that. Nothing at all there, so we can put that bit behind us. Can you tell me, in simple terms, what you are proposing? Nita’s given me her side, but I don’t like Chinese whispers”

The past week had given me the time to work out my ideas in order to try and spot any obvious pitfalls, and it was clear that while Nita obviously suspected that I already had one guest at home, she had no intentions of pushing the matter.

“Simple terms? You know my background, so you know what scares me. I was living rough, and I was incredibly lucky to meet my Mam and Dad when I did. If your lot, either of your lot, had found me, I would have been packed off to another shithole like Runcorn. I won’t do that to kids. I also can’t look after loads of them, so what I am asking for is specific. I am offering space to kids like me. Trans girls. Those who can’t go home, or dare not. Just like one of those domestic violence shelters, safe houses. Nobody gets in without my say-so, and the agreement of the residents, if I have any”

Nita was nodding, but Heidi looked a little worried.

“Not that easy. Parents and families will be worried. They need to know where their kid is, that they are safe”

“Then let them know the kid is safe. Not difficult. If they want to know where the kid is, tell them to fuck off. If I do this, and I hear that you are going to tell Daddy Dearest where their daughter is, I will move the kids out before you get anywhere bear them”

Heidi looked at Nita.

“You did warn me she could be prickly!”

I showed her my teeth.

“You’ve read up on my history, you say. Do you fucking blame me?”

I got a shrug and a wry smile in response.

“You said ‘daughter’, Debbie. Can I take it to mean you are offering to house trans girls?”

“Yes. Only them. No males of any kind. Girls like me don’t cope too well with men, not until we are a bit more settled into life. There’s also the fact that I wouldn’t be able to handle a lot of residents, and there won’t be that many trans girls about”

“Could we have a look at your place first?”

“One of you. And not you. I don’t trust social services, not fully”

Nita was nodding.

“I get that, Debbie. Would you be OK with me? I have some thoughts, and I think it would help if I ran a copper’s eye over the place”

“Why a ‘copper’s eye’, Nita?”

“Escape routes, Debbie. Emergency exits if your notional Daddy Dearest pays a call”

I found myself nodding, as I already had some ideas on that front.

“Sounds like a good idea. When do you want to do it?”

She looked at her colleague.

“This a goer, Heidi?”

The other woman sat for a few seconds before nodding.

“Yes. It is. I can handle the files the same way we do with the DV charities, just a different set of locking drawers. One last question, though. Debbie: are you doing this for the money?”

“What money? I have enough”

“We pay a fee, a support grant, to fosterers. In essence, that is what you will be, a foster mother”

I had a sudden flashback to Mrs Keegan and her readiness to slap my head off for sitting ‘like a bleeding fairy’, and the other foster parents I had suffered under. Not me. Not like that, ever.

“No, Heidi, it’s not about the money. It’s about doing something good for someone else. Like my Dad taught me: they might not get a chance to pay me back, but they can always do it for someone else who needs a hand. Song I like says that it’s only the giving that makes us what we are”

“Paying it forward”

“What?”

“American saying. If you can’t pay it back, pay it forward”

“I like that. Yes. That is what I meant, exactly. But if there’s grant, it would help. Nita?”

“Yes?”

“When do you want a look at the place?”

“Today be possible?”

I thought it through. Kim would be at Ruth’s, so she’d be safe. Get the ball rolling, then”

“I think so. Got a spare lid?”

That brought a genuine laugh.

“As you would no doubt put it, you can fuck right off with that idea! I have a Clio; I’ll drive, and follow you. Just don’t push it on the roads!”

She shook her head, then gave me a much more serious looking over.

“Debbie Wells, you have come a bloody long way since I first met you. In an odd way, I feel proud of you. You done here, Heidi?”

“I think so. Fill me in with the… appropriate details when you get back?”

“Wilco. Up and at ‘em, Debbie?”

I led her through the City to Adamsdown, doing my best to avoid filtering or pulling away from the lights too quickly, and she was only about thirty seconds behind me when I stopped at the entrance to the alley behind the house. After dumping my lid and leather, I gave her a quick tour of the two houses, before we settled down in my living room with a cup of tea each. Nita had a little note pad, and as we sipped, she worked through her points.

“No more students, then? The grants will be handy, so don’t turn them down. Right: access and egress. Some of my suggestions might be a bit expensive, so see them as suggestions, not requirements. First, this house.

“The kitchen opens straight onto the living room, and straight onto the back yard. I would replace that door there with a much safer one. Same for the back door, and that will give you an airlock to check visitors. If you are using the second house, keep the front door locked, but with keys accessible. I would consider a crash bar on that back door for emergency escape.

“The bit that would be expensive depends on what you intend to do with these properties, because it would affect resale values. You could fit a connecting door through what is now the understairs cupboard. If you get busy, there’s also the possibility of a loft conversion”

“Sounds like a fortress”

“Exactly. Leave the outside looking as it is now, two separate houses, but have your escape route next door. By the time anyone has broken down three heavy doors, you can be out of the other back one and away. Know any builders?”

“I might do… I’ll ask. Wouldn’t want to noise it about, would I?”

“Good thinking. Keep contacts as limited as possible. Oh, and get a pay-as-you-go mobile, what the crooks call a ‘burner’, something you can bin if anyone gets the number. A phone that isn’t tied to your address”

The kitchen door banged, Kim bursting through it.

“Ruth’s given us some pud, Debbie, so I’ve shoved it in the fridge and---”

She stopped in mid flow, shock written across her face, and I moved quickly to block the door in case she made a run for it. I ked her across to the settee and sat her down by pushing her gently backwards until her knees bent.

“Want a drink, love? Tea? Pot’s a fresh one”

“I… I should be getting back… I just came in to leave the pud…”

“This is a friend, love. A safe person. Not a threat. Please stay with us. I’ll get you a cuppa, and then we can talk together. Absolutely safe, OK?”

“OK. If you say so…”

I looked over to Nita.

“Could you please do the tea run, Nita? I just want to make sure this one’s OK”

What I didn’t want to do was let Kim bolt. Nita brought the cup in, settling down into her armchair, and I began.

“Kim, Nita. Nita, Kim. Kim, this is someone who is helping me sort the houses out. I told you I am looking at helping other girls, and Nita has a load of notes---show her the pad, Nita? Ta. Nita has been looking at ways we can make this place safer, more secure, so if we get someone who wants to get in, and we don’t want him to, we can keep them out for longer. Want to talk her through your ideas, Nita?”

She began the same litany she had given me, and I saw Kim slowly relaxing, engaging with the ideas.

“Nita?”

“Yes, Kim?”

“The dining rooms. Next door’s living room becomes a common room. That dining room is the main one. This dining room can be a study for school work”

She looked across at me, then at the old books on the coffee table that Mam had bought me.

“Some of the new girls will need to keep their school work going. That’s what Debbie tells me”

Nita stared at her cup for a long time without speaking.

“Kim?”

“Yes?”

“You don’t have to answer me. I won’t be passing it on, whatever you say. It would just be nice if I could close one enquiry down, knowing that a kid is safe. All I need to know is which town you’re from”

“Caerphilly… No. Sorry. Pontypridd”

“So Barry John Norley is no longer a worry. Thank you”

Kim seemed to have recovered some of the spirit that had told me so clearly to ‘fuck off’ on a freezing wet night.

“Who’s Barry John whatever?”

Nita laughed out loud at that.

“I see your spirit is catching, Debbie. Please take this the right way, and I don’t mean to bring up painful memories, but this is exactly what Heidi said. This is what happens when you pay it forward. This is what your Mam and Dad have given you. Kim?”

“Yes?”

“You are a very lucky girl. Can I ask you one more question?”

“Depends. Might not answer”

“Do you know why that boy Barry John Norley might have decided to run away?”

I felt Kim tremble, and then she made me proud, by simply standing up, turning away from Nita and pulling her dress up and almost off. The scars from Dearest Daddy’s belt had faded a little, but they would always be there, clear across her back and upper thighs.

Nita’s mouth was clamped into a tight line, and I noticed one fist clench.

“Please put your dress back down, Kim. That is all of my questions answered, or all the ones I need for now. I suspect you might be meeting some more girls soon, others who also get very lucky. I’ll see myself out, Deb. I have a Dearest Daddy to tell to fuck off”