CHAPTER 30
I went out of the back door and around the end of the terrace, which allowed me a look down the street at whoever was knocking, rather than taking the risk of opening the front door. It was a middle-aged man, suit and tie under a long raincoat, topped off by a golfing umbrella.

“Can I help you?”

He turned to stare, then smiled.

“I recognise that voice. We spoke on the telephone. Rhys Thomas?”

“Ah! Come on round the back. Sorry about this, but we take our security rather seriously”

He stared at my slowly fading black eye for a couple of seconds.

“I can see why. Did you have that properly examined, in Casualty? People have some really stupid failures of understanding about the fragility of the bones around there, never mind the soft tissue”

“Yeah, I got the medics to look it over”

“The assailant? Did the police prosecute?”

“That person is no longer a worry”

“Oh. I see, I think”

We had arrived at the back door, so I let him into the kitchen and asked him to wait, before stepping through the inner door to settle the girls.

“The doctor is here. Are you two sure about this?”

Nell looked to Kim for reassurance, then both nodded. I opened the door again and called the man in.

“You want a cuppa before we get started?”

“That would be lovely, Ms Wells”

“Debbie, please. One of you two want to sort the drinks?”

A few minutes later we had our full mugs, and Dr Thomas was staring at the two photo frames Kim had placed over the sideboard. They were multi-picture affairs, each one holding eight ordinary-sized pictures in their own little compartment. Most of them were from Pat, so we had scenery as well as people, with some particularly lovely ones of the sunrise from our campsite, the hidden bridge and so on, as well as a particular shot that Kim had surprised me with. It showed her, in her swimming costume, standing in the edge of the sea as Pat stood by her, probably naming every single peak on the mainland.

Dr Thomas grinned, shaking his head, before turning back to me while pointing at the photo in question.

“Shall I just leave now? I’ve probably got enough evidence in that one picture to make a diagnosis!”

That broke the ice, so we had a much more relaxed conversation, which ended up in Nell, of all people, pulling out the latest photo album and talking the doctor through it. That worried me, because the clock was ticking and someone like him would clearly have other people to see. He caught my frown, once more smiling at me.

“Don’t worry, Debbie. This is actually all part of my work. I like to see my patients as they are in the wild, if you see what I mean. I will be talking to them separately in a little while, but at the moment… Nell, you say this was how high up? You didn’t take the train?”

“Wrong mountain, Doctor. No train, and we had to do a little bit of rock climbing, scraping snow off the grips”

Kim looked up at that word.

“Holds, Nell, not grips. Anyway, we need to go back to the proper climbing place, when it’s warmer. Maybe take a camera and binoculars…”

That, of course, reduced them both to giggles, and the doctor looked at me with a little sympathy evident.

“You are sharing this place with two teenagers? How are YOU coping?”

I sent him off with Kim first, to sit in the other living room for their private chat. She was back after an hour, and sent Nell in for her own turn, sitting down with a bang on the settee. I gave her a ‘do tell’ look, remembering the pain of my own interview, and she shrugged.

“That was weird, Debbie. He just let me talk, then I realised he was steering it all the time. I told him so much, stuff I haven’t told you, yeah? I even told him stuff I didn’t know I knew. Weird… Will Nell be OK with that? I mean, what she told us about, you know. Not going to land her in a loony bin, is it?”

I shook my head, more in hope than certainty.

“No, don’t think so. That was then, when she was in a bad place. You think she’s still in a bad place?”

“No. She says she’s happier here… No. She says she is happy here, full stop. All she misses is being able to study. Wants to go to university, does Nell, and she knows she can’t do that and be Nell, not properly”

I filed that one under ‘things to try and sort’, before deliberately changing the subject to clothing, and specifically what to wear for the new year party. In what seemed like no time at all, Nell and the doctor were back with us, the girl’s eyes a little red. Kim took her straight into a hug, whispering reassurance to her, as our new doctor settled into an armchair.

“Could I trouble you girls to make me another tea? And give me a few minutes to speak with your guardian?”

Kim towed Nell into the kitchen, shutting the door behind her, and the doctor sighed.

“I have had confirmation from Social Services that you are acting in loco parentis for the children, and they have each given me their consent, so I can discuss things directly with you. The first point is a simple one to cover, and that is the issue of Gender Identity Disorder. In short, despite anatomical issues, you have two young women living with you”

I actually laughed out loud at that remark.

“Tell me something I didn’t know!”

“Yes, well, my diagnosis carries weight that yours doesn’t, Debbie. They are also both heterosexual, which is an area of concern. I had a previous patient, as you are no doubt aware, just as clear in her situation, just as straight, and she had, to use the vernacular, nine colours of shit beaten out of her by a boyfriend when he discovered her situation. I will add that Eleanor, Nell, has a history of serious self-harm, which concerns me”

I nodded.

“Yes, Kim and I spoke about that. We believe that her… her episodes came from being somewhere she had lost hope, and she’s no longer there, so she’s looking at tomorrow, rather than at today’s pain”

“Yes, I tend to concur. For such a young woman, Kim is very perceptive, and surprisingly mature”

“Well, violent abuse does tend to make you grow up a bit quicker”

He stared at me for a few seconds, expression neutral, before replying.

“Yes. I believe you understand that process rather too well. Anyway, my work here is done for today. I have arrived at a diagnosis of GID in each case, and I will set the ball rolling for the rest of their care”

“Will that include hormone treatment?”
“Not until they are eighteen at least, Debbie The same is true for any surgery. There may be a possibility of anti-androgens--- drugs to stop virilisation, slow down their passage into manhood. The law is unclear on that one, but it is an option I can investigate. I am, after all, rather new to this, as I said in our chat. Transsexuals are rather thin on the ground, your place being a bit of an anomaly, in a self-selecting way. Shall we have the girls back in?”

As a foursome, we talked through Dr Thomas’ points, and I could almost hear the voice in Kim’s head: ‘Dur, always known I’m a girl, don’t need a doctor to tell me’, but she kept her thoughts to herself. The shrink left us half an hour later, after arranging another visit for two months’ time. I sat with the girls for a couple of hours, as their emotions danced around the entire compass. In the end, I did the obvious thing, and took them by bus to the city centre, where we addressed the question of what Nell and Kim would be wearing for the upcoming party, which required some serious ‘parental control’ on my part when Kim tried to persuade me to let her buy some particularly silly heels.

“Dress code is jeans and T-shirt, ladies. Besides, I do not want any wrong signals to be picked up. Not everyone there will know me”

Kim snarked up, just a little.

“Yeah, but you said we’d have someone looking after us!”

“I am sure you will. You want them to have to get into a fight if someone reads the signals wrong?”

I was reminded, for the first time in ages, exactly how old Kim really was, so I smiled at them both to ease the sting, before making my offer.

“Anyway, Nell here has very little of her own stuff just now, and by that I mean music. I think we need to sort that one out, and there are some new albums out by people I like myself, and I am absolutely sure there’ll be something in the camping shop that’ll have our names on it. Then it’s back to Ruth’s for tea, and I have just had an idea for Christmas”

I kept my counsel on that idea, as it had only just formed, and we duly did the round of the shops I had mentioned, having a lamb roast at Ruth’s before settling down in our front room with the stereo playing a new CD Nell had chosen, something by Beethoven that was the most danceable piece of classical music I had ever heard. Some of it, at least. Another bit was really miserable, but you can’t have everything.

Nell was fiddling with her new rucksack, trying to work out what all the straps were for, while Kim was engrossed in the pair of hillwalking guides for Snowdonia that we had found. I reached across from my chair for the telephone, our meal filling me comfortably.

“Hiya, Debbie! How’s you?”

“Fine, Malcolm. Just got back from a weekend in the hills. Graham about?”

“I’ll pass you across”

Graham sounded brightly happy, which pleased me, and I got straight to the point.

“What are you two up to at Christmas? I need to run it past a couple of other people first, but I’ll be off just for the day itself, nothing more. You fancy a couple or three days here? I can see what Marlene has planned”

Graham’s chuckle was delightful.

“I would most certainly be up for a night out there, pet! Who are these other people? You courting?”

Ouch.

“No, love. Fostering. I need to make sure they’ll be happy with a couple of men in the house. Usual mate be happy to look after the animals that time of year?”

Another laugh.

“He will be when I sort him the makings of a decent dinner and a stock of booze for the day! When do you want us to come down?”

“Um, how about the twentieth? That’ll give the girls time to settle, and let you rest before you paint the town pink”

“Twentieth is good for us, pet. See you then. We’re having a, um, quiet night in tonight”

Cheeky sod. I hung up, looked at the clock, and made a quick decision.

“Girls, we need to pop out again. Not stopping late, but I need to introduce you to some other friends. I’ll take the van this time”

The place was relatively quiet for once, so I had no trouble getting to the bar.

“Marlene? I’d like you to meet my friends Nell and Kim. Girls, this is my very good mate Marlene. Marlene snaps, but never bites”

An eyebrow sitting much higher than a real one would have done rose even further up a powdered forehead.

“Not unless I am asked nicely, girls. Or asked rudely, or submissively, or pleadingly; I am a versatile bitch. Ah. You driving, Deb?”

“Yes. Bit of a last-minute thought, coming out tonight”

“Corner table’s free. Cuppa?”

“Please”

“Girls? Don’t be cheeky and ask for booze, as a slap in the face often offends”

They stammered out their order, and Marlene waved a scarlet talon at the table in question, joining us two minutes later with the cold drinks.

“Yours is coming, Deb, along with mine. Now, what has brought you out here apart from Moi?”

I cleared my throat, but she continued.

“Girls, Kim, Nell: this is a safe space. I can see what you are, and that isn’t a problem, so put that away for now. Deb and I understand each other very, very well. These a couple you are looking after, Deb? Oh, and has whoever slapped you found wherever you put his bollocks yet?”