Terra and I were back to our rooms at the shore and having kissed and said goodbye to the guys. Terra says, “So Andrea you warm up to guys too. I want to apologize for the guys and my thinking I wanted one of them. It caused me to realize how much I really like you; it also caused me to wonder what Andrew is like.”

I say, “You already knew what I and other guys are like. I’m really offended that really hurt.” I walk-off to our room. I’m half hoping she’ll leave me alone, while even more, I’m hoping she’ll go out of her way to make amends. She’s at the doorway and pauses. I draw up in a ball on the bed not letting go of my tears and praying.

Terra had taken off her shoes so I did not hear her draw close. She gently sits on the edge of the bed and places a hand on my shoulder and then brings it up to my head. “I’m really sorry and I want to make it up to you.” She kisses my head and is near my ear whispering. I wait until her hand is coming down the side of my face and I turn to kiss and nibble on one of her fingers.

I look up between my eyelashes and hair asking, “How do you like me? How sorry are you?”

Terra’s eyes become soft with her smile, “I want to be your girlfriend; I’m worried I might have lost that chance… Is it alright if I close the door and try to make it up to you?”

I cozy up to her, “Too bad I don’t have my stuff; Andrew would like a chance to warm up to you.”

Terra says, “I know a way to undo that but your Momma doesn’t want me to do what I’m thinking. Anyway, Andrea, it’s you that I really owe.” She brings one of my hands up with hers as she begins unbuttoning her top. I help with the next buttons as I sit up to kiss her. She walks to the door and closes it. We have a great time making up, but it’s more a sensual time than Sexual, like the two of us are in a union of spirit. I ended up being engulfed with the biggest wave of ecstasy as I'm not used to such feelings. Even when I thought it reached its zenith Terra delights in taking me further. I can’t remember much after that. Was it then or shortly after that time the lights kind of went out? Instead of black darkness, it was an explosion of color and feelings. When I woke up we were wrapped together warm in a blanket and I was wearing nothing.

My eyes open and I’m back in the present. Terra has a warm damp cloth, cleaning me the best she can. “To do it properly I really need to take your gaff off, but I didn’t want to do it without you knowing.” She has cotton cloth in a solution that she uses to go around the edges of the gaff. It took time to seep under as she lifted little by little. She was gentle and I was very appreciative. She kissed me, “Was the little boy frustrated being hidden away?”

It was only seven Sunday evening, we were arriving at my home when J.C. Harper called. Terra asked JC, “Did you see how beautiful Andrea was in her gown at our Prom?” We were talking about that for a long while. JC complimented our gowns and how good we looked together.

JC finally changed the conversation; “Andrea have you heard how well the debut of your outfits went? They were hot items in the D.C./Baltimore and Chicago/Milwaukee test areas. They were going fair in Seattle until the Sorority weekend competition went viral. As those were going viral girls came for your tutus and fell in love with your other selections.”

“I asked your Mom if two people could come to tape you and your fashions. Thursday or Friday, I tried to get you out of school but your Mom insisted it could not be until after school is over. I don’t think she understands how important this is to us in the fashion world?”

I tell her, “My Mom is going to insist on school first. Andrea can’t go to school anyway.”

People who don’t like me started to make their presence known. I would like to go to school as me two of the last days, but even I’m not sure that would be a good idea now.”

“JC, I was wondering if I could have a little show here at my school or town after the last day.”

JC fires back, “You get out at noon then right? I was wondering if the girls from your art class would help with a show there. Say 3 to 5 p.m. in the afternoon with the display actually opening at 1:00 or 1:30?”

Terra, Jennifer, and Linda are now listening behind me and scream, “Yes, we’d love to help her!” …Jennifer asks, “Can we keep what we show off?” …Terra asks, “How about the sundress design she wants to do?”

JC teases, “That would be great to kick off showing them that day. But you would probably have problems there if there would be cameras getting some pictures. We could move it to your community building and have four makeshift dressing rooms.”

Terra says, “Us graduates will already be out, but Andrea and Carly would need an hour and a half to get ready.”

Harper suggested to the seniors, “I’m sure you older girls can help Carly and Andrea to start getting ready the night before. Things like toe and fingernails, hair can be pinned up and then brushed out and eye makeup started. It would be like a tease to what’s coming.”

“I don’t think my mom will allow that.”

Harper says, “Leah has already agreed to come to visit Ms. Miller the last hour; she’ll actually be helping to get you ready. Two of Xpress’s makeup and fashion people will be with her to help you and whoever needs or wants it.”

I ask, “You couldn’t send a small team could you?”

JC says, “Don’t ask and I won’t need to tell you, and then you wouldn’t be lying to your Momma..." But the corporation says, “We’re opening in many new locations beginning that Friday. You’ll be in New York on TV the previous Monday morning…”

“I can say, But you didn’t ask me.”

JC says. “I just got off the phone from communicating with your Mom. I thought if she wouldn’t agree there would be no purpose to pursue it with you. Am I right?”

I am literally shaking as I just cut off the call from JC; Terra sees it and pulls me over and holds me as we’re now seated. I’m seated on her lap as I turn to Terra in tears. “I’m not ready to be out in public.” Terra, Jenn, and Linda are kind of supporting me, yet also giggling under their breath. I ask, “What’s funny about this. I said I’m not ready to be out and you see me shaking and in tears.”

Jenn speaks up, “But you’ve already outed yourself. We understand being in front of a TV camera can make you anxious, but thousands of other girls are already buying your clothes and have seen you whether it’s here or on websites.”

Linda says, “We’re jealous, but we’re still willing to help you. How would you like to be a seventeen-year-old girl, graduating from high school? You started as a boy this year and now you're modeling your own fashion line of girls' clothing. Frankly, I have more trouble seeing you as Andrew than Andrea.” I’m now giggling with them.

Mom, Heidi, and Leah greet us. Leah gives me a hug, “Looks like you are a women’s fashion expert little brother. I like the outfit you’re wearing. Did you and Terra have a good time at your prom?”

“I think things are only going to get busier once you have your exams done.” Mom moves between us wanting a hug. She then takes me by the hand and asks others to give her a moment. She takes me to her bedroom, hoping others won’t follow.

She says, “Sit young lady, I would like to hear what you thought of the prom and your weekend. We took some really nice pictures at the promenade. I will share them when we have the time to enjoy them. Right now I want to hear from you and how you enjoyed yourself. Don’t worry, I don’t want to know all that you did nor the details.”
.
“Mom, I was afraid I wouldn’t dance well that I might come across as a klutzy boy.”

Mom said, “I heard from Heidi that it was her younger sister that was there all night. I am really happy for you; I know that was what you were hoping for.” Mom helped me to take my gown out of the plastic protection to make sure it was hung up properly. “That is a very nicely made gown, Andrea. It held its shape very well.”

I tell Mom, “Mrs. Miller helped me learn more than little sewing and fashion tips. I've learned the importance of taking care, doing the little things that helped the gown to wear so well.”

Mom was keeping a list of who I needed to thank. Mrs. Miller was already on the list but there were now several things to thank her for. “Mom, you know about the show here where JC wants me to introduce my fashions here. I plan to require that they allow Carrie to be a retailer for my clothes here.”

Mom says, “I think that would be a very good idea. It would take care of us needing sales permits and sales tax and everything that goes with it. JC said she’s going to ask the girls in your Art class to be modeling your outfits.” Mom knows the designs that were sent in and which were to be in production. She and I went over the outfits and which ones I was going to ask each girl to wear. Each one was getting a tutu outfit to wear as their second outfit.

Heidi knocks on the door, saying “It would be rude for you two to stay in the room any longer.” Jennifer, Linda, and Carly are soon saying good-bye. Terra felt a need to get home, but she stayed longer as Leah began to show the pictures that were taken. There was even a picture of Terra and me in the capital city’s Sunday newspaper. Caption, “Boy designer makes his mark in lipstick and skirts.” Mom said that and a few other pictures were getting a lot of internet likes.

I asked about the sorority that was to be wearing my collection of tutus. Leah jokingly says, “They may be too over the top for you to be seeing.” The sorority girls had an awesome, over-the-top time, but I didn’t see anything too out of line. Mom did enjoy my facial expressions and hands as I looked at everything.

It dawned on me I hadn’t seen Dan and my stepbrother, “Mom where’s Dad and Jay?”

She says, “They went over Riverside to check some things out. They stopped to eat on their way back.

Mom says with me closely listening, “Things are not quite decided. Leah’s willing to be in a different apartment, but she said it could be the same house or apartment building. I would plan to come once a week for a night or more as I need to make sure Andrew stays focused on his studies and knows how to keep an apartment.”

I ask, “But I’d be free to be Andrea or Andrew, wouldn’t I? Otherwise, I could stay here and be Andrew.”

After Terra had left, I showered and was putting on a nightgown and going to bed early. I could hardly stay awake. Then I heard Dad arrive back home. I was interested in hearing what he and Jay found or didn’t. I put on my robe and made sure I was proper and went down to greet them.

I bounced over to my step Dad and gave him a big hug. I was going to do the same to Jay until he stepped back and raised his hands. He said, “I guess it was wishful thinking that I’d get my brother back.” Mom and Leah are amused.

“I am your brother, just dressed in girl mode. I thought it went better with the hairdo I got Saturday morning for the Prom.” I said, “I tried to say hi to you and Paige at the prom but you were avoiding me. I just wanted to comment on how nice Paige looked in her gown?”

Jay said, “She has ordered one of your tutu outfits and asked me if you’d autograph it? I hope you’ll say, ‘No!’” I asked why and he said, “Whether it’s as my brother or sister I don’t want your signature on her buns when she’s wearing it.” Everyone laughs at that point.

Dan says, “If you want to hear about where you and Leah might be living, sit down and listen.” Mom poured coffee for Dan and ice tea for several of us. He had Jay’s tablet and began showing us several pictures. “One was an old house, two were apartment buildings. The two we liked are the old house and this apartment building, but both of them were for sale. So if you just rented them things could be changing real soon.”

Jay jumped in saying, “We thought if we bought the old house; there would be a lot of maintenance and upkeep expenses. It would have little chance of increasing in value. And we’d still have an old house. This apartment building has eight apartments, with four of them being two-bedroom apartments.”

Dan smiled at Mom as he said, “We put a fifty thousand dollar deposit on the Rosewood Apartment buildings.”

Mom says, “That’s funny because I didn’t get any phone calls.”

Dan said, “I called and even text you but either I didn’t get through or get a message back. I can pull the offer back tomorrow, we’d only lose $500. He has to wait to cash the check as I’ll need to cash in an investment to cover the check.” Dan hugs Mom, “It should work well. It will even give Leah and Andrew some responsibilities to help cover their expenses. I didn’t know if Andrea would be wanting to invest some of her own money and put the building in her name? She’ll be sixteen and if she incorporates it; it be entirely business.”

Mom says, “It would be Andrew and me. There is a chance that Andrea is just temporary. Andrew wouldn’t want to explain when he’s forty why he has an apartment building listed under Andrea.”

Leah says, “I understand what you mean, but it’s hard to imagine that tonight with your son with a permanent and in a nightgown.”

The discussion goes on for a while; something about Mom having a room in my apartment… Visiting now and then and a doorway to Andrea’s apartment.

I go to school the week as Andrew while my hair is in a ponytail that screams girl. The following Tuesday begins final exams. This will be the first year I am doing well enough to be on the B Honor Roll. The one B that disappoints me greatly is in Advanced Art. Ms. Miller had given me an A for Home Economics. And Carrie is very pleased to have me back to work.

It is the following Monday, I am in New York City with JC Harper. We’re on a morning show talking about what’s exciting in women’s fashions. Norah asks, “Andrea, so how does a male student go from being a novice in women’s fashion to making the splash as Andrea that you are making?”

Today, I’m not directly acknowledging Andrew. “I had just transferred schools and only heard part of what was being asked of us in Advanced Art. I accept blame with my attention deficit for the beginning of the problem. But I draw well and the idea of designing an outfit to me only made sense if it was for a girl. Guys fashions for my way of thinking are blah.” They show my gown as I explain, “This was much nicer to draw, design, and put together. You’re right it was all new to me, but I got a job working at Carol's Towne Shop, a woman’s clothing store. I learned a lot if you notice closely the gown has more colors and different fabrics than usual. Plus I fell in love working with other teen girls and what they’re wearing.”

“When I realized my mistake, I didn’t really deal with it well. I kind of set up a conflict with my Art teacher that I kept putting off. Mr. Murphy required each of us to wear our own outfit in our Spring Art exhibition and some special event. Needless to say, I didn’t make a passable girl. But instead of backing down or getting embarrassed like Mr. Murphy was trying to do. I decided to surprise everyone as Andrea and Andrea’s Threads began.”

Norah asks, “But Andrew is the one going to school. How difficult is it for you to relate to the other students, especially boys?”

“Andrew’s art and home economics classes were completely girls except for him. When it came time to model my gown. I didn’t want it to be a boy in the gown so I wore it as a girl. I was fortunate to have JC Harper there. Once again I found myself as a novice; JC Harper is so amazing to work with.”

Norah says, “Andrea, what do you have to show us for this summer?” Terra, Jennifer, and Linda are welcomed out one at a time. I too am impressed with the outfits, but it's my friends sharing the time with me that excited me most.

I as Andrea says, “There are so many sides and ways girls can enjoy the way they look. Instead of worrying about what others might say, they with their friends can enjoy themselves.”

Norah breaks in, “We’ve heard from other friends that say you go out of your way for other girls. One friend said you helped her take some simple dress and make it into a special Prom dress… Another girl spoke of being at odds with her grandmother. That you pleased them both and each of them bought an extra dress that they love. I am told these are not isolated incidents, how do you do that?”

I say, “I’m not sure, it’s just that they open their lives to me. They’re the ones who decide if it’s good or not. The girls in my art class were so attractive and yet each was different. It helped me to see different possibilities in different girls.”

Norah says, “Earlier before you were on, someone saw you sketching and thought you were drawing me with a different outfit. Would you be willing to show us?”

“I’d be happy in showing you later but it was just a fun thing.” …Norah says, “Well, JC Harper showed it to me and said it is different for you. Here, I think it’s really good, but what’s different about it?”

“Well, for one, it’s a Sundress and I hadn’t designed sundress yet. Two, it’s not for you on screen but a fun time out with your children. I could imagine you getting away with your girls. If you can’t enjoy that this time is less important”

Norah says, “Wow, I like the dress, the colors, and your idea of relaxing with my children. What do you think JC, can you get them to make this dress for me?”

JC says, “If they don’t, you have the designer right here. She could make you a designer original.” Gale was gone, but I did leave a drawing for her.

I found out I was not excited to be in the limelight. I liked talking to Norah and others but I’d rather do it more informally. The idea of doing a sundress for her would be more fun if it isn’t purely business.

Tuesday I met with Trey Michaels as my counselor, I thought it was to be Dr. Hannah Sinclair. I was uptight in seeing him and was tired from the long day, the day before in New York City. I had taped two other shows. Trey is a licensed psychologist but by the end of the hour, our time was done in more ways than just today’s appointment. I went as Andrew, when Trey said, “I think it is Andrea, I need to meet with.” I knew we were done.

Dr. Sinclair was now willing to meet with me, but that would be four weeks from now. Well, I didn’t have that great of a need for a counselor. Thankfully Dr. Higgins was disappointed with my experience too.

Dr. Higgins suggested, “If you’re going to live near North State University and go to Central City High School. I suggest you contact Dr. Saga Dotter. That she is a Psychiatrist with one of her specialties being in gender identity.

I pointedly asked, “So you think that I’m sick too?”

Dr. Michele Higgins smiles as she came and sat across from me. “Please listen to why I’m suggesting Dr. Saga Dotter. She is from Sweden and addresses gender issues in a positive light. We’ve talked and she told me you are unique, but not sick. She said, if anything, you have a healthier spirit than most. She says she is tightly booked between being a professor and her practice. But she would love to see you as a patient beginning any time.”

“My Mom says “Wednesdays are best for me. Do you think we could get an appointment with her the Wednesday after next?”

When I finally got to school most classes were very casual. Ms. Miller asked if I or other students would talk about their experiences this year. Lisa Jenkins remarked, “Ms. Miller I know Andrew is the most obvious one who benefited by the openness of this class. But you gave all of us the space to grow in many areas. My achievements are much smaller but they’re very important to me. I know other girls feel the same.”

It was a short while later Ms. Miller asked, “Andrea, as you opened up this year, did you become friends with other girls in the class. Do you think that has or will impact your career and as an individual?”

I was surprised, to say the least, by the teacher recognizing me as Andrea, when I’m visibly Andrew. I was ready to take it as a breach of my personal space. Looking at Ms. Miller I could see she was permitting me to be Andrea. She was wearing one of her traditional long crocheted vests. I asked if I could borrow it. I had a stick of lip gloss and a small brush in my planner. It took a few minutes, as the class continued to share, but I wanted to present myself as Andrea if I spoke.

I said, “I still don’t know all the different knots in crocheting; likewise I’m still growing in being me and in designing clothes. It has been here and the art class that I found the freedom to explore women’s fashions. Most of you are better than me with various things. I don’t want to be you nor to be totally a girl, but you have allowed our friendships to be my bigger lesson for my growing to being me.”

Gwen a freshman asked, “Have you as Andrea been kissed by a boy, or is it something you’d like?”

I said, “I learned not to say never, but so far I’m more interested in being one of the girls than I am in boys.”

Gwen says, “I don’t think you answered my question. I suspect you’re uncomfortable in saying.”

Her friend, Beverly asked, “If that is true I would be happy to arrange for a double date. I know a boy or two who would love to kiss you on a date. Maybe supposedly watching a movie.”

Someone said, “I think she’s afraid of hurting her relations with Terra.”

After school, I enjoyed being in a small crowd of girls. Lisa and her friend Tish were writing notes back and forth. Terra’s arms wrapping around me rubbed against my nipples. I am sure she knew what she was doing to me…

To continue…

Characters:
Andrew, Heidi, Leah Stephens;
Michele Stephens-Johnson – Mom; Dan Johnson – Step Dad
Jay Johnson – Stepbrother
Mr. Murphy – Art Teacher; Principal Valarie Hayes.
Terra, Linda, Jennifer, Sarah, and Clara -Older Students in the Advanced Art class
Caroline, Carrie – Owner/manager of the women’s Towne Shoppe
Ms. Andrea Miller – Teacher, Home economics, Family Life class
JC Harper and
Girls from school Beverly, Eve, Gwen
Grandmother Elizabeth Hollister
Granddaughter Sharon Hollister
Sandra is a friend and classmate of Sarah’s
Lisa Jenkins
Doug Martin
Dr. Michele Higgins, Debbie Higgins one of her daughters.
Bridgette and Rita students from high school