Going to school as Danica is now becoming my routine. I’m counting off this is the 20th day before school ends. I saw Harrison earlier and remember I have growing feelings for him. With Lisa, the feelings are different as she is further away, even though with my tablet she has some of my attention. Harrison gave me a quick hug as we passed in the hall.

Melanie’s there and quickly reads my thoughts, “Don’t go there, it’s not about what you are, you care about him and he loves you. We have a big week ahead, relax and let yourself enjoy being Danica.” I thanked her, I marvel at the close friends we’ve become. She has her other friends and she’s just a special friend different from Lisa or Harrison.

It was Tuesday after school that I stopped by at the Deter’s home. I was delightfully surprised to see Christiane. Her eyes sparkled and her skin had some color. “I’m happy to see your smile, Danica,” she said, “I was hoping you’d see the difference. Last week was my last set of treatments before they take some new scans and assess my health.”

She said, “Last week my oncologist asked what was different? He said I had a different spirit and my will to live was back… All I could come up with was you were in my life as well as Harrison going to his prom. The oncologist thinks your friendship with Harris is good medicine for me. …I told him most definitely, but that it was your massages and our friendship as well.”

I found myself moved and ready to cry when Christiane began to apologize for upsetting me. Something inside confessed it was something more, “It is not just you Mrs. Deters. I get upset by how much I like being Danica. I talk and feel with you and others, more than I felt and do as Tim. I try denying that I like being me and the way I can talk with you and others.”

She asks, “Does it hurt that Harrison sees you as a boy and you as a girl?”

I said, “No, someone reminded me today that is because it’s about love more than sex. Actually, I’m hoping we’re comfortable liking the other as he or she is.”

Mrs. Deters giggles, “I don’t think you need to worry about that.” We hug and go share tea and some sweet bread.

I hadn’t meant to stay but I’m there after 6:00 when Harrison got there. He’s hot and sweaty from practice as he gives me a big hug and kisses. “How’s my girly boy today?” He’s lifted me and one hand is under my buns as he hugs me. It is not any girl that he’s after, nor has he called me ‘girly boy’ unless we're alone.

He lets me down and I smooth out my skirt and blouse, “Yes, I know, I’m your boyfriend as well. I love you too, but I came to see your mother.” His mother insisted that he drive me home and he did.

Wednesday was school miss-match day, and Thursday was pajama day, but every year a few more tempt the school to call it off with the scant clothes some of us wear.

Monday through Wednesday, we had plenty of rain and as fate would have it I passed by my old sliding hill numerous times and I stopped at Melanie’s house to visit with her mother. Mrs. Sinclair showed me files of her photos of Danica, even two of me after I took my first bath there and was dressed and playing with Melanie’s sister Trudy, and one of me having my fingernails first painted by Susan. That was extra funny as neither Susan nor I had any thoughts that we’d become good friends.

I laughed again when Melanie’s mom asked me to call her Jodi as she was Aunt Jodi to Harrison. “I hope you never hold it against me that I’m the one who got you involved with the Deters?”

I said, “I know quite a few people feel bad that I’m Harrison’s prom date, but I would never want you to be one of them. It began out of sympathy for Mrs. Deters, but I think in reality I was Danica or a Darby Sue way before the incident with the muddy mess. I don’t think I could have been any luckier than when I chose your house here to stop at. I bet I looked like the dirty rascal I was.”

Jodi giggled, “It was a time you looked up at me like a little puppy all matted with mud and I saw a cute puppy that I fell in love with. After you were bathed between your longish hair and being in Melanie’s clothes there was no way I could send you home to your brothers. Somehow, your presence with Dad Sinclair’s death eased my grief and helped me to be there for my girls…”

“Your mom informed me two years ago that Danica/Darby Sue never fully left you. I thought the odds were against you helping Harrison, but I thought as Melanie’s friend and knowing what I did; it deserved a chance. I am now worried about you and Harrison being together.”

I asked, “Are you worried that we won’t or that we will have a good time and enjoy one another?”

“You sound like a girl teasing her Aunt Jodi.”

Danica’s happy saying, “I’m not saying any more about that. I am glad to have Melanie as one of my best friends. I can even squeeze in some of her clothes though the skirts are a bit short and my shoulders are different.”

I said, “Aunt Jodi, can I confess that I don’t think it is going to be easy just to be Tim anymore?”

“I don’t think those who love you,” she said, “automatically expect it to be. I think your parents, Christiane and myself as well as your friends just hope in time you find who you are.”

“But what would you think of me, if Harrison causes me to become gay,” I asked?

She hugs me, “I don’t think a dress makes you a girl, and I don’t think an experience makes you a homosexual. I suspect that you’ll find you’re transgender but that will be for you to find out some time. Right now I think you’re one of the healthiest young people I know.”

“Is your mother going to take you to your salon appointment in the morning or would you like me to take you?”

“My Mom is looking forward to doing it. She was going to offer to take Melanie but I was sure you wanted to do that.” Jodi gave me a squeeze, “Good thinking.”

Friday during and after school we girls got together as many times as we could; sharing pictures of our gowns and chosen hairstyles. Some even showed sexy panties and bras. While Melanie knew I had some it was not for others to know, not even our ‘rents.

I still kept my friendships with Stewart and Ben. They were the two guy friends who were most comfortable with me as Tim becoming Danica. Bill Majors a friend of Harrison’s was a self-appointed protector nowadays when I present as Dani. You might have guessed Dani is Harrison’s preferred name for me presenting as Danica. I don’t prefer everyone calling me that but it’s become natural with Bill and Harrison.

Since I’ll be busy at the salon and getting ready tomorrow for the prom; I go again to see Christiane. She’s having another good day and is awaiting word on her last CAT scan. Her doctor’s appointment is this coming Tuesday.

I know she anxious, but she insists it is all for Harrison. “I was afraid I wouldn’t be feeling this good or even wanting to be here now. You agreeing to be here for Harrison gave me the spark I needed. I can’t say thank you enough.”

I responded, “And you’re my inspiration to look and find my love for your son. I have no problem being the girly boy he sees me be. I see myself as a beautiful girl, yet I know I’m also Tim. Even if I were present as Tim, I’d happily wear his ring.” Yes, Monday he asked me to wear his ring; for us, that means I’m his special person.

I had hoped Harrison would come home before I left, but Mrs. Deters reminds me he’s playing two games today instead of having one tomorrow.

I went home to shower and change, staying fresh is something I do much better as Danica. I have a short visit with my parents promising to be home by 10. Melanie and I are going together to Halle’s house to be with a bunch of others girls. It started as a normal girls' gathering, but come eight a bunch of guys showed up. Melanie’s Travis was soon there and I was feeling left out of it and wanted to leave. I had even found my light coat before I hear Harrison call to me. “Sorry, I’m late. I didn’t know about getting together and I wanted to check on my Mom. I guess it’s a force of habit.”

I said, “Well at least you changed your shirt and washed, you smell better than most of the guys.” Eternity for Men was a new fragrance for him. I was with him when he bought it, but this was the first time since then that I recognized his wearing it. I had only used a drop of Melanie’s Love Spell and was glad they didn’t clash. Between his fragrance and his own scent, it was nice to be close.

That some guys were excited including Harrison, didn’t surprise me. And I was glad that Halle insisted that she had spiked two of the bowls as little as they would be. Anyone getting drunk would be out. Her parents there gave her enough authority. When Rick was asked to leave it was neither a surprise nor a problem.

That I didn’t get home until 11:00 was not a surprise to my ‘rents, and I was happy that it was insisted. We had left the party at 10:30 and had enough time. It gave us time to kiss, and snuggle together. It would have surprised me as early as two weeks ago to ponder what I was hoping for tomorrow night. I was in love and I had decided I wouldn’t pass it up.

My gown was hung up on a special hanger on my closet door. I enjoyed getting out my bra, panty, stockings, and body shaper for when I came back from the salon. There on top of my dresser was a necklace, two bracelets, and a sapphire ring in a wooden box near an old jewelry box. My Mom promised me a jewelry box if I decided to stay as Danica. I was dressed in nice workout leggins and a zip-up top.

My mom drove me as I expected and took some photos as she saw me into the salon. Patricia my beautician soon greeted me at the desk and took me to her station. I had three styles I was choosing from and Patti recommended two I should choose between. “I like your choice, I think it’s the best.” That made me feel good.

She asked, “Will it be okay if I shape and thin your eyebrows to go with your hairstyle and look?”

Melanie is soon next to me, and we giggle looking at each other in the mirror. I’m not sure when or how Patti and Melanie’s stylist realized I was a boy. Patti smiled as I said, “I’m only Dani to my date, otherwise I’m Danica.”

Patti says, “To me, you’ll be the most beautiful girl there.” Later she asks, “Are you the one going with Harrison?”

I lift his ring hanging from my neck, “His boyfriend/girlfriend however you look at it I love him.”

Pattie smiles, “He is very handsome.” Even as Danica the salon appointment is changing my appearance. Part of me is afraid, I’m becoming too beautiful for Harrison’s taste.

Melanie must have read my mind as Patti was fixing my hair at the last. “Danica, he knew you’d look beautiful and he wants you to be happy for yourself. He knows his mother will love seeing how beautiful you are.”

It is after one when I get home and my Dad and Brien are there as I come through the door. Brien says, “Megan warned me that little sis will be beautiful.” Cousin Lisha is coming over to help you and mom to get your gown on without hurting your hair and makeup.

Cousin Lisha is twenty-something, lives over twenty miles away, and is related on Dad’s side. I haven’t seen her in years and never as Danica. Mom giggles, “It’s her or Ms. Drake two houses down. She’ll be here after 3:00.”

I was fit to be tied waiting that long to get dressed. I had changed into a skirt and a buttondown blouse before Lisha got here. Lisha confessed, “Your mother had sent me a picture of you and the gown. I had seen a picture of the younger you dressed as a girl. It is nice how you have blossomed.”

I had gone to the toilet one more time and it was well after 4:00 when I’m finally in my gown. My hands were shaking as I reached for my makeup. “I’ll do it until your hands get steadier; don’t worry you’re not the first to shake for a moment.” Lisha, not my mother was enjoying zipping and buttoning up my dress. It was nearly five when Lisha, Mom, and I agreed my makeup was done and my jewelry was right. I stepped into my 3” heels as Lisha spritzed a spray of Ambush into the air and I walked through it. When I looked in the mirror I was both happy and surprised to see the glimmer of my cleavage, under the chiffon tooling of my gown.

It was mere minutes before I heard a car drive up. Harrison had his mother’s Chrysler 300 and I could tell it had been finely detailed. If Melanie hadn’t told me about all the pictures I would have been screaming the next few hours. My parents had pictures taken of me alone, with my parents, Brien and Megan. And now there were more pictures with Harrison and me and my brother and Megan with us.

We went back to see Mrs. Deters for pictures there. There were two other aunts and a few cousins there as well. Melanie was there with Travis as Jodi wanted to see me in my gown and all made up. When I went to get my compact, I looked in my clutch purse and saw a third condom in it. I touched up my lipstick though it was still good. The pictures seemed endless, only Melanie and Harrison’s smiles helped me endure them.

Story to be continued…