Why? That is a good question. It is the one thing that people who don’t understand ask when they find out about a persons TG tendencies. Most people who are not ‘T’ or who have never lived with or had a close relationship with someone who is ‘T’ are usually full of so many invalid preconceptions that we face a really uphill struggle to be accepted.
-
Terry was a good woman. Well, she thought she was. A lot of other people did as well. The aura she presented to the world was one of confidence and sophistication. Inside, well, it was very different.
In a nutshell, her problem was her husband Stan. Over the years since their marriage and the birth of their two lovely children, he had gotten increasingly moody and distant.
It got to the point where Terry asked him one night as they lay in bed,
“Stan, are you seeing another woman?”
This caused Stan to sit up in surprise.
“Eh?”
“I thought that my question was pretty simple. Are you seeing another woman?”
“No I’m not. What made you ask that?” replied Stan.
She paused for a moment or two.
“Ever since I met you, I have felt as if there was someone else in your life. I can’t put my finger on it but that is how it seems. At first, I dismissed it but recently, I can’t ignore it any longer. It is as if you aren’t here half the time.”
She paused again.
“Please tell me I’m dreaming?”
Stan didn’t say anything but looked at the now empty dinner plate.
“There is someone else.”
Terry said loudly.
“There I knew it! You were lying to me.”
Stan said softly.
“No Terry, I was not lying,” I said with total honesty.
The next morning at Breakfast, it was more of the same.
“Don’t tell me you are gay!”
“No my darling. I am not gay.”
“What the hell is it then?”
Stan looked down at his plate again.
“I wish I’d been born a woman.”
There was a pregnant silence for a few seconds.
“What did you say?”
“You heard me. I wish I’d been born a Woman. I want to wear lovely clothes like you. Not the boring stuff we men have to wear. I feel more at home in the company of women than with men. I want to walk around in heels, stockings and a skirt. I want to go and get my hair done. Have my nails done. Sit gossiping with my women friends and spend hours talking about nothing in particular.”
Terry was confused.
“Why?”
Stan couldn’t answer her. It was in his genes. It was in his soul. It was in every fibre of his being.
All he could say was,
“It is just I. I am not ill. It is who I am. If you want a divorce then fine. I can’t go on living this lie any longer. I love you but I can’t hold this inside me any longer.”
None of this registered with Terry. All she could say was.
“Why?”
No matter what Stan said, Terry just replied the same way,
“Why?”
In the end Stan gave up and walked out of the house. He needed some air and some time to think. His world was now a total wreck.
When he returned, he saw the word WHY painted all over his car. All his clothes were lying on the dewy grass outside.
He stopped dead in his tracks and thought
“Why did she do this to me?”
[The End]
We hide the fact that we are ‘T’ and our feelings sometimes so deep that it twists us up in little knots. This can also be really everyone in our lives who have no idea of the turmoil going on inside us.
I use the ‘T’ for anyone who is Transgendered, Transsexual or just a Transvestite. To most non ‘T’ people, they are all one and the same.
I’m one of those who owns more pairs of heels than I do ‘mens’ shoes.
So what does that make me? Don’t answer that…
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Comments
WHY?
I won't answer that for you. But I've know too many of similar background. The first one I met while working at Douglas Aircraft( previously to McDonnell-Douglas Aircraft then Boeing Company) in Long beach, Second one after going back into the service and station at Ft. Knox, I was off post at a popular store when leaving a girl followed me out then ask if she could talk to me and wondered why she knew my name, it ended up she was a door gunner on one of the Huey's I crewed in Vietnam, but when I knew her she was a man. I've known several others since then. Then seeing the Statistics on how many there are born this way and there problems in life and they there are a lot out there that suffer without knowing WHY? So I'll stop there!
Richard
It's a question I dread...
...and it's usually the first one people ask me when they meet me. And I never know what to say, because as I've said numerous times here, my story doesn't fit the textbook transgender narrative.
Livin' A Ragtime Life,
Rachel
Why?
I don't know... It is just who I am... Because I am more than you see... Because I haven't transitioned... It's who I am since I can remember... Because I'm really a girl.
Responses: But you can't be... No you're not!... I would have known if you were really... Looking back I can see that... I accept that but don't let me see you... Don't talk about it... Why did you feel you needed to tell everyone who is important to you... You are imagining what you want to believe...
I like one an alcoholic told me. "Because a butterfly kicked me in the head." To people's response "That doesn't make sense." His response was "It makes as much sense as anything else I would tell you."
JessieC
Jessica E. Connors
Jessica Connors
"Because a butterfly kicked me in the head."
I like that!
Actually that seems to make sense to me.
Maybe I am more messed up then I thought. :p
*giggle*
I very much like that line.
But I would change the antagonist to a Pixie, because mentioning pixies seems to confuse people even more!
:D
xx
Amy
"pixies .. confuse people even more! "
No wonder people act oddly around me.
*giggles & emits a burst of pixie dust*
Oops, did I fly to close? Hope it wasn't me who kicked you in da head!
~Hypatia >i< ..:::
*recoils*
... and looks around, momentarily dazed...
How come I suddenly want to dress as a pixie princess for Halloween?
Xx
Amy
Halloween Outfit
I rather fancy Morticia Addams. The long flowing dress - nice.
Never say "Don't answer that"
"I’m one of those who owns more pairs of heels than I do ‘mens’ shoes.
So what does that make me?"
It makes you an interesting person. You might even like to have a bit of fun.
It means at the very least, you understand gender isn't the clothes on your body. Clothes are just an image that you present to others.
It means that you don't mind some chaos since you obviously don't fit in the nice neat little boxes that many like to describe as normal though at best it is an average. I find a lot of people just don't get the concept of average is what most call normal. Some of us don't like to be average though most of us are actually normal.
It could mean nothing. After all, they could be just decorations and you are an artist.
Your strange Aunt left you her shoe collection in her will and you have to keep them to fulfill her wishes.
I could go on. In all honesty, it doesn't really matter what you say. People will make their own judgements and put you in the neat little box that makes sense to them.
Snow Wolf
Thank you for the very nice
Thank you for the very nice and interesting comment.
The woman in this story is based upon my ex.
She just couldn't grasp 'The Real Me' (The Who, Quadrophenia)
I went back to the doctor
To get another shrink.
I sit and tell him about my weekend,
But he never betrays what he thinks.
Can you see the real me, doctor?
I went back to my mother
I said, "I'm crazy ma, help me."
She said, "I know how it feels son,
'Cause it runs in the family."
I am one of the onlookers on Brighton Seafront in the Film.
I have an interesting past yet my ex thought I was boring and just odd. After 20+ years of marriage I didn't fit in her box any longer.
boxes
I was hoping for interesting. You might find a story or 3 or 4 there.
As a kid and an adult I never did fit in the little boxes. I also knew that there was very little I could do to change things. At 50, I don't expect to find a wife any more. Music and books or just stories have always been an escape for me. My electric guitar has been one of the few positive things in my life lately. Even writing crappy lyrics gets some things out.
Snow Wolf
Not politically correct...
But I occasionally tell people it is a minor birth defect, female brain (literally), male body. Since we can't fix the brain, we go for the body to make it match the mind. A lot of autopsies were done on those of us who couldn't take it anymore to reach this conclusion.
When I was a man I had 3 pairs of shoes, period. Old work shoes for yard work, painting, stuff that would trash them, new work shoes (same make, same model, when they wore out I would rotate the old shoes into the trash), and dress shoes.
Now I have over 10 pairs of shoes and growing. Strange how stuff that didn't make sense before now does. Just don't try to get me to explain why my shoes have to match my outfit.
Very true
My brain is most certainly wired up differently. For starters, I'm left-handed. Then there are the female bits where there should be some male ones. But I do like stuff like Playing Rugby, Classic British Motorcycles, Industrial Archaeology, Steam Engines and other predominately male things.
Now I must go, I have a Birthday cake for my grandson that needs icing and decorating.
Crazy mixed up dude/dudesss then?
I own more than three pairs of shoes...
...but generally use only one or two. In my situation--disabled with a definite shortage of cash--shoes are a problem. Some styles I can't wear at all, some I can wear only when my feet are completely unswollen, and my feet are just too darn big (11W) for most of the really cute shoes I see in the store.
I deal with the problem by staying with neutral colors--black or gray--so I can wear the shoes with more outfits. I have a pair of gray Nikes I wear with most everything.
Livin' A Ragtime Life,
Rachel
This short piece made me
This short piece made me think Why? to myself for a while.
Not necessarily a bad thing, but something I tend to try to avoid, as it makes me all maudlin.
Oh well.
Looking forward to your next piece. - as anything that makes me think is valuable.
xx
Amy
Not worth it's salt
Guess when she said "until death do us part" she didn't mean it.
Had she truly loved him she would have understood is explanation and then supported his desire. Her love for him would have compelled her to help do what was best for him.
Others have feelings too.