Wheels and wings 18

Character List.

Jack Thomas Later AKA Ellie Transvestite/intersexual and keen cyclist.
Amanda Thomas AKA Amie Jack's sister.
Charlotte Dawson Keen girl cyclist and Jack’s soon-to-be girlfriend.
Bob Cycling club captain.
Mr Thomas Weston School games master and keen rugby player.
Billy Davies. Rugby ‘jock’, kind to Jack, he fancies Charlotte.
Marjorie Spencer. Holder of unofficial ‘Prettiest-girl-in-the-school’ title.
Miss Elizabeth Postlethwaite. The English Mistress.
Aunty Olwen Where Jack changes for school and leaves his bike.
Mandy. Olwen’s daughter, Jack’s older cousin.
Mr Griffiths The County solicitor.

Chapter 18.

Eventually, as the stores started closing the girls began to wind down and make their separate ways home. Mandy, Amie and Ellie were walking across the car-park to their car when Charlotte accosted them.

“Can I speak to Ellie alone please?”

Ellie stared reproachfully for despite her knowing and accepting that she had betrayed Charlotte and her father; she still felt she had been treated harshly. Once Doctor Dawson and Charlotte knew the full circumstances surrounding the pain-killer drugs, Ellie thought they should have at least shown some forgiveness. She glared as she responded.

“What d’you want to say Charlotte; you’re not going to cause trouble are you?”

“No! What makes you think that?”

“I’m still suspended by the club. I even wrote a letter explaining about the bullying at school and the pressure with the rugby and stuff, but they didn’t respond.”

“Well that wasn’t down to me or my dad.”

“Why should I believe that? I even wrote letters of apology including one to your dad but nobody replied ... nobody! I’m thinking of leaving the club anyway.”

“That’s stupid; now you’re over-reacting.”

“Am I? None of you, not one person in the club has asked how I’m doing, how I’m feeling. If you don’t care, why should I bother? It’s as if I’m a non-person or something. When my membership comes up for renewal, I don’t think I’ll renew it, I’ll join another club!”

Charlotte hesitated because she knew that was not possible. She explained.

“You won’t be able to. You were suspended because of the drug rule and no other club will accept you without a letter from Bob and the club secretary.”

Ellie fell silent. Things seemed to be falling apart in her male life though deep down she wasn’t sure whether she was bothered or not. Now that she had managed to cross the threshold from boy to girl and do it convincingly, she wasn’t certain she wanted to go back. The last few hours spent in a totally female world of emotion and support had felt like a total deliverance, a heavenly dream. It was an indulgence she had savoured and drunk deep of the well. Having settled some unanswered questions that afternoon, Ellie changed tack and asked Charlotte.

“So what was it you wanted to talk about?”

“Us.”

“Us? I didn’t think there was any more ‘us’.”

Charlotte’s face darkened more from fear than anger.

“Is that your final word?”

Ellie’s uncertainty and indecision now emerged.

“I don’t know. How can I know? You ask me to talk about ‘us’ when I’m right in the middle of a major crisis, who am I, what am I, where am I going. How can I give anybody a final word when I’m like this?”

Ellie shrugged and pointed her fingers to herself to emphasise her incongruence as she added.

“I don’t even know if I want to be a boy or girl.”

“You make a pretty good girl or is that just a shell, a masquerade?”

“Is that what you think?”

“I’m asking the questions here.”

“Ha! And you think I’ve got the answers?”

Charlotte fell silent. ‘Maybe Jack or was it Ellie, didn’t have the answers.’ She decided to ask her dad about it. However the other question still remained. She still had feelings for Jack and she didn’t want to lose touch altogether. Then Ellie dropped another bombshell.

“I might not be going back to that school. I hate that bastard Weston and when he learns of my being a girly boy, he’ll make my life a misery. There’s only one more term to go until the summer hols and then I’ve got the whole summer to decide. I’m thinking of asking Mandy if I can live with her and go to school in Manchester. There’s a whole gay village up there.”

“That’s for Adults. You’ll still be under sixteen.”

“Nearly fifteen ... End of July.”

“That’s still not enough. The gay village only caters for adults. It’s clubs and cafes and stuff.”
Ellie wagged her head.

“That’s where you’re wrong. There’s an advice centre and a drop-in centre for younger people. I know I’ve been online about that as well.”

“What about a school? City centre schools‘ll be a lot worse than ours.”

“I’ll cope. I’ll get the advice centre to tell the school and then I can go as a girl.”

“You’d have to get a doctor’s letter for that.”

“They’ve got doctors in the advice centre stupid. Don’t you think I’ve checked all that online?”

“Don’t you call me stupid! How was I to know that?”

Ellie fell silent. She now began to feel she had mixed feelings again and it confused her; she still wasn’t certain about anything. Charlotte’s reappearance into her life served only to complicate things. Up until then she wanted only to escape from reality, to put all her old life behind her and start afresh — probably as a girl but she still wasn’t completely certain. Trouble was she had little or no idea of where she could even start. The living with Mandy idea had not been a certainty; she hadn’t even mentioned it to Mandy or her mum. Charlotte’s reappearance had thrown her completely off course though it had forced her to focus on the future issues surrounding her transgenderism. She shrugged and to avoid any further conflict she pleaded that she was late for dinner.

“Look, I’m late now, Mandy and Amie are waiting. I’ve got to go.”

“Are we going to see each other again?” Charlotte almost pleaded.

Her tone brought Ellie up short. She had more or less written off any hope of friendship now that she had ‘come out’ fully. For want of anything constructive to say she played the ball straight back into Charlotte’s court.

“You’ll have to speak to your dad about that. I’m a druggie and a thief; remember? Oh, and a tranny.” Ellie added for good measure. “He’ll probably have serious reservations about his only daughter being involved with a kid that’s got my problems. They’ll probably get worse as I get older; that’s what the internet says. You’ll be better off without me.”

Charlotte fell silent as Ellie stalked away with her heels clicking purposefully on the pavement slabs. She watched the boy disbelievingly as every step belied his maleness. Ellie was radiating seduction with every swaying step and the long shapely legs served only to exaggerate the flowing motion. Then Charlotte realised Ellie had not looked back once before she rejoined Mandy and Amie at the car.

‘Obviously Ellie felt it was over.’

~~ooo000ooo~~