Wheels and wings 31

Chapter 31

Character List.

Jack Thomas Later AKA Ellie Transvestite/intersexual and keen cyclist.
Amanda Thomas AKA Amie Jack's sister.
Charlotte Dawson Keen girl cyclist and Jack’s soon-to-be girlfriend.
Bob Cycling club captain.
Mr Thomas Weston School games master and keen rugby player.
Billy Davies. Rugby ‘jock’, kind to Jack, he fancies Charlotte.
Marjorie Spencer. Holder of unofficial ‘Prettiest-girl-in-the-school’ title.
Miss Elizabeth Postlethwaite. The English Mistress.
Aunty Olwen Where Jack changes for school and leaves his bike.
Mandy. Olwen’s daughter, Jack’s older cousin.
Mr Griffiths The County solicitor.

Chapter 31

The following morning Ellie stared into space as she stirred her coffee and ruminated on the forthcoming hospital round. She had confirmed the previous afternoon that their ward visit with Professor Thomas did indeed include a visit to Charlotte’s bedside. Charlotte’s hip had been broken in a dangerous place close to the neck of the femur where the blood supply to the bone risked serious interruption. The issues of the ensuing potential bone death were an important item on that ward round agenda. Although the risk was now over the medical aspects were still the subject of medical attention and teaching.

‘Probably just a routine visit,’ Ellie mused. ‘The usual questions about the X-rays and demands for a suitable course of therapy and cure.’

She finished her porridge and swigged back her coffee then turned to face the day. When the class was assembled, Professor Williams met them and divided them up into their regular pairs.

“Right, this is the list of patients. They have all given their consents to being checked over by students so here are your rotas. Each pair will determine a diagnosis and a recommended procedure then I will accompany the whole class as we discuss each patient in front of them. This way, I hope you’ll address your bedside manners as well as your diagnostic skills. Right, chop-chop, we haven’t got all day."

Ellie was teamed up with her regular classmate, a vivacious, Chinese girl whom she had seen haunting the gay bars around Canal street. They had met and embarrassed each other as they each recognised the other from their class then fell apart giggling.

After a disastrous experimental relationship they concluded there was no romantic spark between them but they certainly shared the same sense of humour. They had parted without recriminations but remained good friends and agreed to share a student flat the following academic year provided they both passed their exams.

As the pair chatted about their assignments, Ellie explained about Charlotte. Lai Ling listened thoughtfully then grinned as she detected the hidden undertone.

“You still like her don’t you?”

Ellie smiled uncertainly. Since seeing Charlotte again, she had felt a few waves of emotion. It was hard not to, considering the circumstances of their re-union. However, she was too scared to recognise her feelings as love in the conventional sense. Lai Ling’s question had provoked long suppressed feelings that Ellie was fearful of allowing back into her life. One catastrophic relationship had been enough to smash Ellie’s fragile self-confidence and it had taken all her college years littered with excellent academic success to reinstate some sense of worth, some sense of value to her self esteem. Any hopes of a worthwhile relationship had to be put aside.

‘Besides’, Ellie told herself, ‘I’ve got three more years of med school and then specialisation. It’ll be a long, long time before I’m ready for any sort of relationship. Then of course, there’s the transition thing.’ She reflected further. ‘Where the hell am I going with that?”

Her reflective silence was not lost on Lai Ling who just nodded sympathetically before tactfully changing the subject and returning to the cases they were scheduled to study.

At eleven o’clock the professor gathered her class and set about the ward round. The professor had long ago learned that most patients, once they were fit enough, were more than keen to be the ‘centre of attention’ and have their ailments discussed in depth and at length by an assortment of visiting medics. Charlotte was no exception. Since coming around from the coma she had expressed her consent enthusiastically for she knew about Ellie being in the student group. Her father had used his professional status to chat to the professor and told Charlotte that Ellie was doing that particular round.

When Professor Williams and the student group attended at Charlotte’s bedside, Ellie and Charlotte exchanged what they thought was an invisible glance but Professor Williams’ sharp eyes spotted it, mainly because she had learned from Charlotte’s father about the previous friendship at school. Professor Williams had deliberately left Charlotte’s case until the last and Ellie now realised that she was the last remaining student to be required to give her opinion on the last remaining case. After completing her examination of Charlottes’ injuries and giving the prognosis, Ellie realised that Professor Williams had deliberately chosen her to give an opinion in order that Ellie could learn that Charlotte’s recovery was more or less assured.

In an attempt to hide her previous relationship from the rest of the class Ellie had commenced giving her diagnosis and prognosis in as impartial and neutral tone as she could muster. After a couple of sentences, she hesitated as her feelings tried to take hold. The strongest emotion she struggled to suppress was the sheer unabated relief that her friend was now returning to health with high expectations of an excellent recovery. That relief tried to express itself with tears but Ellie swallowed hard, clenched her teeth momentarily then finally delivered the final part of her prognosis. As she finished, a momentary silence settled over the room as Ellie tensed expectantly. Professor Williams was quite obviously a master or more correctly, a mistress of high drama. She watched as a whole spectrum of emotions galloped across Ellie’s face then she smiled; an enigmatic smile that did nothing to settle Ellie’s nerves. Finally, she spoke clearly.

“Have any of the class anything to add?”

Ellie sensed the reluctance of the other students to contribute but she kept staring rigidly at a spot above the door behind Professor Williams and studiously ignored Charlotte after having examined her. The silence would have become oppressive had not the professor brought the lesson to an end.

“Very good, I want you each to give me written copies of your diagnosis by two o’clock this afternoon then we can discuss them collectively, at length during the afternoon; class dismissed.”

As the class started to disperse the professor called to Ellie.

“Oh, Miss Thomas, a short word over lunch.”

Ellie’s stomach sagged treacherously as her nerves started to overcome her. She nodded, swallowed then stumbled after the professor to the dining room. Professor Williams gave no indications as they chose their food and it was only after they had chosen a table that she smiled at Ellie.

“Nervous?” She asked.

“Not sure Professor,” Ellie replied, totally belying the nausea surging through her belly.

“Don’t be. Your diagnosis and prognosis was spot on. A few minor details but we’ll discuss those this afternoon with the rest of the class. Actually, I just wanted to congratulate you.”

Ellie stiffened uncertainly.

“Why?”

“Well firstly for controlling your emotions while you delivered your prognosis. Miss Dawson was a very close friend of yours I believe.”

Ellie hesitated for she wondered where this was going. Finally she responded in a neutral tone.

“Yes, she was. We went to the same school.”

Professor Williams eyed Ellie with a significant glance.

“Was, you say. Is she no longer your friend?”

Ellie was stuck for an answer for in truth, since Charlotte’s appearance back in her life under such traumatic circumstances; Ellie’s feelings were all over the place. On several occasions she had felt waves of torment as she studied the comatose Charlotte lying silent as the grave while the equipment beeped out its monotonous knell. On some of those occasions, Ellie had seriously wondered if Charlotte would ever wake up, or if she did; would she ever be normal? Now that Charlotte was awake again and deemed recovered; other questions had returned to haunt Ellie.

‘Was she ready to try again with Charlotte ... was Charlotte prepared to try again with her? What about her intended possible transition? Did Charlotte want children? Did Charlotte want Ellie’s children? Was she, Ellie capable of fathering a child before she transitioned? Ellie’s last personal, microscopic examination of her pitifully small ejaculation had revealed a few sperm but compared to a virile man, Ellie’s sperm was almost sterile. By normal definitions, Ellie could be declared sterile. If Charlotte was to conceive by Ellie, it would have to be a test tube job and would Charlotte ever accept that scenario.’

As these and many other thoughts swirled through Ellie’s brain, Professor Williams silently stirred her tea. Finally she repeated her question.

“Well, is she no longer your friend?”

After a brief but respectable hesitation, Ellie confessed.

“I don’t know. There are too many unknowns.”

“D’you want to chat about them?”

Ellie squinted uncertainly.

“What? D’you mean with you?”

“I don’t see anybody else at this table.”

“D’you mean give me advice and stuff?”

“Yes; lots of ... stuff as you call it.”

“Stuff like what?”

“Stuff like ideas, solutions, actions.”

“I don’t follow,” Ellie frowned.”

Professor Williams put down her cutlery and steepled her fingers.

“I’m told you don’t intend to transition until you’ve graduated or even completed your RCS exams.”

“That’s what I’m thinking; yes. It’s no secret; my tutor’s got everything on file.”

“I know; I’ve spoken to her this morning just before we started the rounds. That means you’ll be close to thirty, certainly your late twenties.”

Ellie nodded as Professor Williams expanded.

“It strikes me that your transition is not that urgent and that’s unusual. Nearly all full transsexuals want it done yesterday.”

“I think I do want it, but I can’t say when. Don’t let anybody tell you I don’t. But I want to keep my options open and I’ve still got reservations. But; well...”

“But it’s not urgent,” the professor finished for her, “I’m right on that aren’t I?”

Ellie nodded.

“Yes you’re right up to a point, it’s definitely not urgent indeed I’m still not sure I want it. But if I do, it must be in my time, when I’m ready. I can’t help the uncertainty; my whole gender profile is a mess.

“What age roughly, do think you'll need to make the decision?”

“I’m pretty sure I’ll know when I’m thirty; one way or the other.” Ellie replied flatly but with certainty, “thirty or thereabouts.”

It was Professor Williams’ turn to nod and Ellie raised a questioning eyebrow.

“Why d’you nod?”

“She wants your children you know.”

Ellie raised a questioning eyebrow so Professor Williams explained further.

“Her father told me. He told me Charlotte and he are very close.”

Ellie nodded as she added.

“They are. Charlotte’s mum died when she was very young so Charlotte uses her dad like a normal daughter would use a mum; even for the emotional stuff like boyfriend trouble.”

It was Professor Williams’ turn to raise the questioning eyebrow and Ellie explained.

“I was that boy-friend. She was incredibly kind to me during early high-school; by my side during all the crap that comes a tranny’s way. We fell out over my later behaviour but that’s another story.”

“Care to explain?” The professor probed gently.

“I’d rather not. I was a bit of an arse-hole but it wasn’t entirely my fault.”

“Do you really want to get back with her? I can’t help unless I know a bit of the back-ground.”

Ellie sighed then shrugged.

“You may as well know. I stole some drugs from her father’s dispensary cabinet.”

Professor Williams’ expression darkened slightly.

“You don’t do drugs do you?”

Ellie bristled slightly before realising she had been too brief. Her subsequent anger at her own failure to explain properly caused her to be a bit sharp.

“No of course not; they were painkillers. I’d been injured in a stupid rugby game ... the school was obsessive about flippin’ rugby and I got injured during an important inter-schools county final on the Saturday. On the Sunday I had a trial for the junior national cycling squad so I stole the key to Doctor Dawson’s medicine cabinet and stole some pain-killers. On the Sunday trial I overdid it with the painkiller injections and collapsed after the race.”

Ellie went on to describe events that followed and how she and Charlotte eventually broke up. When she’d finished professor Williams nodded slowly.

“Nothing irreparable then?”

“That’s a matter of perspectives. It seemed irreparable all through the remainder of our school years. We ended up never even speaking for the rest of our time sharing the same classes until we left for college. Oh ... except for a furious row at the prom night. I turned up in a ball-gown that surpassed hers and I think she was jealous. I dunno’ exactly what sparked the row but I left with a clear conviction we would never ever see each other again.

This blood business has left me emotionally rudderless. I mean; we’re the same rare blood group, how weird is that and will it affect our children? I suppose reconciliation might not seem inconceivable now; now we’re both more mature ... It certainly seemed irreparable back then,” Ellie sucked her cheek, “but you know how it is, I was immature ... well, we both were really. Anyway, I thought I’d moved on until this accident and the blood business.”

Professor Williams smiled and they carried on chatting until the ten-minute bell tinkled to warn staff that lectures were resuming. Having never eaten in the senior dining room before, Ellie grinned at the idea of senior professors being bound by the same rigours as the students. They chatted for another five minutes then walked to the lecture room just across the block.

~~ooo000ooo~~