Public Property

Dauphin has written some stories on boys that are famous. I told him he should write my story. I started singing when I was just a baby and when I was 8. Mom uploaded a video of me singing on YouTube. It went viral! I could not understand but 50 million people seen it! Then she uploaded another video of me singing “Purple Rain” and over a billion people saw it. Some producer wanted me to do an album and that sold quite well. So, I was a famous boy when I was 9! Everyone knew who Dakota Rose was! Everyone knew who I was!

I am 10 now and you would think that I was happy being a celebrity. It was mostly fun, and I liked that everyone thought I was good and we're proud of me. I had loads of fans and everyone said I could be the next Michael Jackson. However, I had no time to enjoy it. People always wanted more and more. If it was not do interviews, it was doing concerts or planning the next CD. I did not have time for old friends and felt like someone was tugging me in different directions.

It was a midterm break and all 10-year-olds had a week where they could play or do something fun. I was expected to take photo shots and be in the studio all week. This was a horrible thought. I have been working for 2 years and had no break!

I broke down just before midterm started and told mom all that I told you. I started crying and saying I wanted to be like I was and play sports and use my bike. Mom hugged me and told me she was proud that I was honest and said it was becoming too much. She told me that the record company has a huge schedule and I was under a contract. She would have to speak to the bosses and see if there was any solution.

The bosses must have been drunk or something because they said I should have a week off. They also promised that when the school had holidays, then so would I. This made me so happy as I could play around for a week and not worry about being anywhere at a certain time. The other good thing was that my aunt was here. She was great fun. She was always in a good mood and wanted to do crazy things. This often annoyed mom who said that Aunty did not have children because she was like a child herself. This was most likely true, but I knew we would be having some fun.

The problem is most of my friends were away or doing other things. I moped around the house for the first day or two and just sat on the sofa watching TV or reading a book. I heard mom telling my aunt that I was depressed and burnt out. I could not even walk out the door beside being attacked by fans or paparazzi. Mom was afraid if I stayed home, I would be depressed all week. This made my aunt come up with one of her ideas. She suggested that we spend the week on the road visiting places and visit a huge amusement park. Mom thought it was a great idea, but she also had work to do. This did not stop my aunt, that said she would take me on a road trip.

So, a bag was packed and before I knew it, we were in aunts car and driving out of town! We turned on the radio and she lowed the roof of the car, I do not think my aunt understood anything about speed limits, as we sped through the small roads. Aunty told me that we would go to a huge amusement park. It was like Disney land and I knew it would be fun. It was a long ride, so we would stop and see things along the way. We had 5 days, so the important thing was having fun. I relaxed back in the car and was thinking about the amusement park. It didn’t help when one of my songs came on the radio. It made me wonder how I could walk around in an amusement park and be left alone. They would notice me, even if I wore sunglasses. Then I would be chased all around the amusement park. Aunty must have known what I was thinking because she turned off the radio and told me that this week, I was not to be a celebrity or public property. I was to be a normal boy that just wanted to have fun. I smiled and thought this week could be fun.

Saying something does not mean it will be true. We decided to stop and have a burger before we found a hotel to sleep in for the night. We ordered the pizza and I was about to sink my teeth in it when a teenaged girl recognized me, and she came over and told me how much she loved my music and how cute I was. I smiled and hoped she would go away, but the situation became worse. All the children in the burger place were around my table, asking for selfies and autographs. It was amazing that some girls went hysteric and started screaming and crying. They never dreamed that their idol would be sitting here. It became impossible when they were touching me and poking me. My aunt told me that it was time to leave. We had to force our way out which was nearly impossible. Lucky enough, aunty was a strong person and not afraid of pushing a child and making a small path for me. I begged them not to hurt me, but by the time I came out I had blue marks and my clothes were torn in places.

I sat in the car with teary eyes as Aunty drove away. She was silent as if she was in shock. This was not a new experience for me, and I felt sorry for my aunt. She could not eat her meal in peace. I whispered that I was sorry. Then she smiled and said it was not my fault. She also promised that she would think of something that would prevent this in the future. “I want you to feel normal this week and have fun,” she said, “It’s a shame that people cannot give you some peace and treat you like public property. Your aunt is smart though. I will think of something!”

We found a hotel to sleep in, and lucky enough no-one recognized me by the time we found our room. We ordered some food which was good because I was starved. I could still see that Aunty was thinking as we ate. She said that we planned to see the amusement park the next day. I was excited about this. I was also afraid as I would most likely be torn apart. I tried to smile, but I think Aunty could see that I was afraid. She told me that she would go down to the shop and I could get some rest. I teased her and said women always had to go to the shop.

I fell asleep while she was gone. There was an old film on TV and it was so boring, that I fell asleep. I was dreaming of being on a Ferris wheel and people were crawling up it like spiders when they saw me. There was no escape as the wheel stopped when I was at the top. I screamed and told them to leave me alone! I woke up and looked around. Aunty was there and noticed I had a nightmare. She gave me a hug and said 10 years old is too young to be so afraid! We hugged for a while. I felt safe and the nightmare became less important. Maybe I should just live inside a house and have a huge security fence outside. God gave me a talent, and it was fun using it… but it also came at a cost!

Aunty jumped up and emptied the contents of her shopping bag on the bed and smiled at me and asked what I thought. I looked and could only see panties, tights, a fluffy red and white dress and a wig.

“I don’t think those girl clothes will fit you,” I said in a matter of fact way.
“They are not for me! They are for you!”
“I do not know if you noticed, but I am a boy!”
“You are a boy that cannot be in public and not be pounded upon by fans and crazy people. The solution is here. Who would expect you to be dressed as a girl? Everyone will think you are a girl. You will get peace.”
“I AM NOT WEARING A DRESS!”
“It’s a small price to pay to have some peace!”

I was in shock after the suggestion and could not even begin to understand it. I know some girly boys at school get called sissy and teased a lot. If I wore a dress, I would be like one of them. This would be a living nightmare! Wearing a dress would be weird and so wrong. What if someone recognized me. I would be in every newspaper and everyone would think I was one of those sissy boys!

What was Aunty thinking?

I put away the clothes and told her there was no discussion. I felt sorry that she used all that money, but she could have asked me first.

The next day we were at the amusement park. Everything went fine until we were waiting for the first ride. Within minutes, it seemed everyone was around me. I was being poked at and my hair was being pulled. I looked around for my aunt and she could not reach me. I as in the middle of a mob and I begged them to leave me alone, but they did not listen to me, they just continued screaming and pulling me from all sides. Then a worker lifted me and pushed through the crowd until he took me to some shed. He told me that I was safe here. My aunt finally found us. She looked worried and gave me a hug.

We were quiet when we were once again at the hotel. I put on my pj and just sat down and watched TV. Aunty threw away my clothes, that we once again are torn. She washed the cuts and bruises that were on my body. We did not say much, except that people were crazy. When I was about to sleep, aunty tried to cheer me up by saying that we could stay at the hotel for the next few days and still have fun. She was looking forward to seeing the castle the next day, but she could see that another time. She gave me a hug and said we can visit the hotel's facilities

The next day, she must have got a shock. I was up early and found the bag of clothes she bought. I put the panties on and after some struggles put the tights on. After 10 minutes of wondering how girls put a dress on, I managed to get that on. Then I found the wig and put that on. It was very tight on my head and I doubted that a hurricane would blow it off. I looked in the mirror and this pretty girl was looking back. This was a strange feeling. I was used to people calling me cute and handsome, but it was strange being pretty. It was just as strange seeing me as a girl. If someone saw me, they would never guess that I was a boy! This made me giggle as I thought that I make a good sissy!

Aunty woke up and was shocked when she saw me. I told her that we could now visit the castle. I knew that she really wanted to see this castle. She quickly got dressed and told me that she could hardly recognize me. She fixed my wig, so it looked proper and would not fall off. She told me I was not the girl in the dress, it was just like an acting role. It was just to fool all the fans that acted like a mob around me.

It worked! We went to the castle and no one recognized me. This meant that we could look at all the exhibits in peace. I even forgot in time that I was dressed as a girl, except when I could feel a breeze flowing up my dress or feel the sensation of the tights on my legs. That was a strange feeling. It was like butterflies were always around my legs. Otherwise, my aunt whispered occasionally how a girl should act. Like when I sat down, I had to remember to close my legs. The castle was great fun! Despite that I was dressed like a girl, I felt so normal and I was having fun.

On the way home, Aunty said we could eat at a restaurant as that was more fun than a hotel. I was no longer afraid of people recognizing me or knowing I was a boy dressed as a girl. We stopped at this family restaurant and decided to eat there. This was despite the restaurant was having a singing competition on who could sing one of my songs the best! As we ate our dinner, we heard one child after another singing one of my songs, pretending to be me. This made me smile as I told aunty that they were pretending to be me, and I was pretending to be them! Not only was I was pretending to be them, but I was also pretending to be a girl.

Aunty was shocked when I stood up and said I would enter the competition. She said that it would be unfair as I would win for obvious reasons. I told her it would be fun singing one of my songs as a girl. Aunty smiled and said she would cheer for me. So, I was on stage and sang “Purple Rain” which was a special song for me, as it was this song that got me noticed. It was a strange feeling that everyone could see that I was a girl, and no one notice who I was. After the song was done, the judges wrote some comments down. Basically, they thought that I was brave and did my best, and one judge even said that I did not even sound like Dakota Rivers. I should have taken off my wig and show him who I was, but I thanked everyone and sat down next to aunty, who could not stop laughing. She was proud at me for trying my best.

The next few days, I dressed as a girl and aunty bought more clothes. There was no problem anymore about me being harassed or noticed. In fact, I felt like I had more freedom in these clothes. It's not because I got some peace. It is hard to explain, but I felt more special. I felt different and enjoyed that people treated me like a girl. I thought the clothes were much nicer and I could express myself better than just wearing jeans and a t-shirt. All these thoughts were making me a bit afraid. Did I prefer being a girl than a boy? Was I, in fact, a genuine sissy. I wanted to speak with my aunt about these feelings, but she always had plans.

It was soon time to go home, so I was surprised when aunty gave me a new pack. It was a one-piece swimming suit. We were going to the beach she said. So, we went to the beach and put I put this one-piece swimming suit on me, it was pink with white bubbles on it. I looked at Aunty to let her know there was a problem. The swimming costume showed a little bulge that clearly showed that I was not a girl. Aunty smiled and said no one will notice. The one thing that I should remember is not to get my wig wet. So, I had fun splashing in the water, looking at shells and playing in the sand. I was going to make the best out of today as I was soon going back to my life as a boy and a celebrity.

I was playing in the sand when a woman and her daughter came down and sat down next to Aunty and me, that was sunbathing. I could see them stare at my boy bulge in the swimming costume and I knew they could see I was a sissy boy.

I was right.

The woman said to Aunty, “I admire you for letting your daughter express who she really is. There are so many transgendered children that do not get that chance. It is people like you that the world needs.”

She went on and on, but I only heard the word “transgender” and knew that she knew I was a boy dressed as a girl. Her daughter looked at me and quickly got bored of the talk. She told me that we should play. So, for the next hour, we were like best friends on the beach playing and having fun. It was a long time since I had this sort of fun. I could feel that she was a good friend. When we were exhausted, we sat on the beach and just talked.

“I know you’re a boy,” she said, “I do not mind. You are a girl to me because that is what makes you happy. Did anyone tell you that you look like Dakota Rivers? All my friends have his music and posters and things, but I think he is overrated…. I hope you want to be friends. We can skype each other and keep in contact. My name is Mallory”

Aunty said it was time to go. I told her that I had to give Mallory my address. It was funny to see her face when she read:

Dakota Rivers
Skype: Dakotarrivers*****
Ps. Nice to meet someone who is not a fan.

I smiled as she walked away.

On the way home in the car, I was worried. What would mom say to the fact that I spent a week as a girl? Aunty told me we should explain everything and the fact that it was a good disguise. She was sure my mom would understand.

I told aunty that I like being a sissy. She looked at me in and said, “Sissy is such a bad word. You could be confused about your identity. You enjoyed being a girl. The question is if this was because you were not bothered? Or could it be because you really can identify yourself as a girl? If this is the case, you can be transgendered.”

We spoke about being transgendered on the way home. Aunty said transgenders do not have an easy life and are often misunderstood. She thought it was such a shame that boys and girls were treated so differently. In the end, we agreed that I should not put myself in any box. I should just be happy.
Mom laughed when she heard the story and was happy that I had such a break from the world of fame. When I unpacked, I put the girl's clothes in a corner in my closet.

Mallory and I became good friends and spoke every night on Skype. Later we would go to college together and even get married, but that is another story. She always thought I was overrated as a musician and never became a fan.

I did not like the fans when they were crazy, but I loved their support when I released music or something like that. There was never a question that I would retire. I enjoyed singing too much and loved making new music and concerts. I also valued my private life, which is something fans would never understand.

I was not a transgender or sissy. I enjoyed my week as a girl but also enjoyed being a boy. I think my aunt is right… why do we treat boys and girls so differently and put people in categories? Could a girl like some things a boy does and visa versa? I was simply a boy that liked being a girl occasionally.
That week was not the last that I wore a dress.