Things started with Jeff turning 13 years old, dressing in his sister’s clothes and makeup; he didn’t expect to be caught… His sister discovering him cross-dressing began the blossoming of Jessie... Life has changed and for the first time in her life she sees herself totally as Jessie and that she has absorbed Jeff into being her.

Previously: The last surprise of the outing was Jessie’s Brother Rob calling her. “Hey Sis, Jacob asked me, if I would go to a movie with Tami if he takes you. … I said, “You need to know, there are five girls here.

Now: The boys finally arrived a little late and it took even more time to agree about the movie. Something to eat would now need to wait until after the movie.

Tami saw me watching Louise once we were in the theater and said to me: “Don’t be watching Louise all that closely. You have fun being with Jacob, and just make sure he doesn’t have too much fun with you.”

I said to Tami, “No way, would Jacob act up and try to go too far. It’s not like he sees me as a regular girl. He’d be too afraid of my parents.”

Tami lightly giggled, “He knows who you are and he’s the one who pushed for the date. I’m pretty sure he likes the candy he sees. About your parents, he’s quite likely to see how far he can get. He expects you to be quiet if you let him go further than he should.”

Tami changes the subject, “And I don’t want you to be watching your brother. I doubt little sister has a realistic view of her brother, so don’t be watching us.”

Each guy paid for the girl with him, buying the movie tickets and the refreshments. It was kind of funny as everyone was on good behavior well through half the movie. Most of the guys had finished the popcorn within ten minutes of the start of the movie.

Since my outfit was nice, part of it new, I had mixed feelings about Jacob’s greasy hands holding mine or being around my shoulders. He was nice; truthfully he was too nice. I wanted him to cuddle me closer to him. It took two times of me nudging before he got the clue. I had been getting chilled, his warmth felt good. There was a time I looked at him and he was staring but wasn’t sure what to do.

I asked, “Are you afraid of me?” He shook his head no. Then I said, “I’d be happy if you gave me at least a small kiss.”

He said, “But it’s only our first date?” He paused, “I guess, I’ve been over your house enough times, but please don’t tell on me.”

I said, “My lips are sealed …for a kiss.” I was afraid I would feel like Jeff being kissed by another boy, but if Jeff was there he must have liked it too.

All the girls agreed when we talked later, being with older boys was different and mostly better. Sondra whispered in my ear, “I think Louise had some pent-up feelings. I think she and Hank had the best time of all of us.”

With school out for the summer, I was able on Wednesday to see Dr. Kim Stoults at 2:00 p.m. and Dr. Beth my counselor at 5:00. Rachel took me to the appointments. Mom hoped to be at the last appointment. Rachel and I got to do some window shopping between appointments.

Dr. Kim Stoults warmly greeted me, “I see you aren’t wearing your breast forms. Is that just because of your appointment?” Dr. Kim used her stethoscope to listen to my heart and lungs. Working her way over and around my growing breasts. She asks me, “Now watch how I check your breasts. I want you to be doing this once a month from now on. I am not expecting you to find any lumps, but a woman should still check for the possibility.”

She said, “Do you see how your aureoles are forming bumps around the edges as they are touched? Have you noticed your nipples being aroused? This is a normal and healthy sign that you are maturing. I recommend however that you do not seek to become sexually active at this time.” She waits until I’m again looking at her, “Has your mother begun talking to you about your body and being a girl?”

I was happy to say “Yes. She’s been good at doing that, but it feels strange. Talking to her is a bit uncomfortable for me. It is not like I’m going to have to worry about becoming pregnant or anything.”

Dr. Kim sat across from me and she said, “You should be careful just the same. If another girl asked about your period or a boy about you protecting yourself. It might send the wrong message if you act like it doesn’t matter. While getting pregnant shouldn’t happen, there are no guarantees. You are not exempt from getting STDs or bacteria that can cause a vaginal infection; which can be real trouble. Above anything, you should respect yourself.”

After examining me, Dr. Stoults asked, “Do you know what a vagina gaff is?” I was embarrassed, I said, “I read the information on the internet.” She said she would give me the information I could trust. Then she showed me one, saying you might want to talk to your mother about wearing one. It would be something you could use with little to no help from others after a while. And if someone got a peek at you down there, they probably would not notice it’s an appliance. There are some that look more realistic. I think it is something you should wear if you go back to school as Jessie in the new school year.”

We reviewed my medications: the testosterone blocker would be maintained; she raised, my hormone therapy cocktail, as she calls it, and gave me a prescription for a special skin cream. “Hopefully, since you haven’t gone through puberty as Jeff, maybe your female glands will begin functioning at a higher level, closer to other girls.” She told me, "It is not likely but something I'll be looking at with future blood tests and checking your hormone production to see develop so you can live as a girl without the supplements.

Dr. Stoults asked, “Would you mind if Rachel came back to end our visit? A lot of these terms and instructions will be easier for her to remember and share with you and your Mom later.”

During our window shopping, Rachel and I had an enjoyable sister talk. The only thing we bought was a necklace from me to Rachel. I loved I bought something so delicate and pretty for her. Growing up I had bought her and mom gaudy Christmas jewelry. I hadn’t realized it was cheap and probably wasn't even nice. More times than not she’d wear it and give her little brother a kiss saying ‘Thank you.’

We’re a long way from Christmas, but I didn’t want to wait.

I had thought Dr. Hunt would be happy for me when I arrived for my appointment. “Jessie, I know you made an important decision, but I think you need to take more time to make sure it is the correct decision. The important thing here is that you know who you are. You need to gain a good understanding of who you are as Jessie.”

I asked her if she remembered how her body felt when her breasts started to grow, at least then I saw a smile and a little glow on her face. I was upset she wouldn’t talk about her experiences. She said, “We’re here to talk about you. How do you feel as Jeff in letting that part of you go?”

“I don’t want to talk about Jeff, I’m just Jessie. He’s now totally part of me.”

Dr. Beth said, “It is not healthy if you are stuffing him down in a secret place like Jessie felt for so long.”

“I was sad Jessie was hidden away so many years. I’m happy to be out and free finally.”

“Okay, Jess how did it feel to be hidden away for so long? When did Jeff first acknowledge you were there?”

Jessie said, “I was me when I played with Rachel's dolls underneath my blankets. But my Mom would always put them back in Rachel’s room.”

Dr. Beth asked, “Is Jeff needing to be himself at night when the lights are off?”

“No, I really like being me. It’s like Jessie’s always been me and I was in the wrong body.”

I was glad that at the end of my appointment Mom’s there. It was kind of decided today we would wait until the end of June to request my name to officially be changed to Jessica.

I was tickled that I had messages and calls both from Matt Jacobs and Jacob Andrews. Mom was not pleased and reminded me quite strongly that I wasn’t to be dating. Jake would be over the following day. When he and my brother went to the park to play basketball with other guys. I went along to watch.

I was flattered when Jake acknowledge I'm a bigger girl. It was sad that my Mom didn’t understand. He and I agreed come Saturday that I would act like I was staying home being really tired. Around 9:30 that evening I would sneak out my window and get away with Jake.

I called and went over to Tami’s and be with her and April. We were on Tami’s computer searching sites for clothes fashions, summer hairstyles, and swimsuits. I was disappointed when Tami wasn’t excited about me getting together with Jake. She was actually jealous and said it wasn’t a good idea.

I thought when she saw me with Jake she would understand, but instead, she said, “Jessie, you are trying to grow up too fast. He wants more than you understand.”

Tami was back over at my house when my Mom approached me, “Jessie are you planning to go behind our backs and meet with Jacob tonight?”

I was so angry at Tami, “How dare you, Tami, I thought you’re my friend. F**k, you should have kept your big mouth to yourself.” Tami tried first denying that she said anything and then. I tried to hit her and chase her out of the house until my Mom stopped me and I ran to my room.

Mom asked Tami, “Tami, please stay here for a moment.”

Mom then came to my room, where I was still infuriated. “Mom, I’m a teenage girl. I’m a big girl, not a little child! Tami was to be a friend, not a little tattle-tale.”

“Jessie, be quiet and own up to what you’ve done,” Mom said. I wasn’t having any of it and I told my mother so. She said, “I wish you were a little girl and that I spanked my girls. Now sit up and listen!” I had never heard my Mom speak so strong like that. It caught my attention and I sat up like I was told.

She said, “I was the one who asked Tami what you two were doing tonight. When she told me you were too tired to go out tonight; I remembered as Jeff you would say something similar. You acted tired and were going to sleep, but you already planned to sneak out. I asked her what you two were planning? She said she and April were going out without you. I asked her what you were planning to do, but she said she wasn't sure. When I asked if she wasn't sure or afraid to say, I knew.”

Mom knew she had my attention, when she said, “I asked if it was with Matt or Jacob. I could tell by her eyes it was with Jacob." Mom said, "Jacob sees you as a very pretty girl. He has no trouble seeing you like a big girl. Do you want the reputation that could come with your actions tonight?”

“Mom, I’m not like that. Jacob’s a good guy, he wouldn’t.”

Mom sits down next to me and takes my hands, “Jessie when your sister, the doctors, and I tell you to take time to grow like a girl. We’re not talking down to you. I’m sorry but you have little idea how nice it feels when a guy touches you. One thing you probably would not do is feel like you wanted to stop. One of you, if not both, would want to enjoy the moment more.”

“Part of me is happy that you’re becoming the young woman you want. But I’m not happy at all about the way you were planning on sneaking out tonight!” Mom was now holding me, kind of a hug, but she was shaking like she’s scared for me. “I know you’re probably going to be with a guy sometime before I want. But I want you to promise you’ll give yourself time to grow and mature as a young woman. I want you to know yourself before some guy tries to help define you. Can you agree to that?”

I didn’t intend to cry, but I did. I thought of Tami, “Mom, do you ever think Tami will be my friend again after how I treated her?”

Mom said, “I asked her to wait, she might still be out there. Go talk to her.”

“But I’m too embarrassed.”

“If you want to be a woman, it starts here.” Mom gave me a hug and a push toward the door. I didn’t want to go talk to Tami right now, but she’s my best friend.

Tami was near the outside door still ready to leave when I asked her to stay. “You hurt me, Jessie. I didn’t tell your Mom but I was thinking about it. You could have messed yourself up big time. My Mom would have shot me if I acted as you did.”

I wasn’t proud, and kind of hurt, “Can you forgive me for how I acted? I was glad you hadn’t left, though I would have deserved it.” Tami stepped toward me and I was quickly over to hug her and I cried about how sorry I was. Tami gave a mean pinch to my butt and I retorted, “What was that for?”

She said, “I wanted you to remember how big of a pain in the butt you can be. You hurt me a lot more than that pinch.” Tami wiped my tears from my eyes and I wiped hers. We both smiled and I fixed ourselves both some lunch.

Rob soon came through the back door and the way he stared, I knew that he knew about Jake and me. He said with a little anger, “You can forget what you planned with Jake. I told him he better not come over for a few days. And if you don’t want Mom and Dad to know you better not say anything to me!”

I said, “Mom already knows and I’m in trouble. So are you happy now?” Rob looked to Tami wondering if I was telling the truth. She nodded her head, yes.

Tami and I went to my room where we talked a lot more. She called April and we were asked to go to April’s house. Mom said I was grounded on our property. I didn’t think it was fair to my friends nor did I want to tell April what happened.

Tami and I played girlsgogames on my computer until Tami wanted to do more. Rachel was home by when Tami left. She had a date to get ready for but found more than enough time to give me a serious talk.

She said, “I’m sorry to hear you got in trouble with Mom and Dad. But it is better you got caught now. Then if you got away with it and in trouble later.” Rachel sat down across from me. We just talked and she got across her points without preaching to me. She saw the girlsgogames and clicked onto it. She said, “You know along with the fun of dressing up and gaining different looks it can be fun to just sit back and enjoy being a girl.”

Rachel, “Do you remember my prom dress? I was so excited when I bought it, but it was you who helped me to take the time to enjoy it.” She took me to her room and went through the clothes in her closet. She pulled out a dress that was really pretty but she had outgrown it. She asked, “Would you please put this on?”

I was a bit self-conscious when I began to take off my clothes, down to my panty and bra. Rachel had taken the dress off its hanger and handed it to me. I had undone the buttons and stepped into the dress. It was lined and felt wonderful as I put it on. It fit very nicely, but since Rachel and my body were not the same there was a bit of difference in how it fitted me. Yet I enjoyed it immensely. Rachel said, “If you like it you can have it, but Mom or someone will need to help make it fit properly.”

I swept the dress under me as I sat down. But there was no special event to go to. I quickly understood that would take time. It wasn’t going to be just any dance I would want to wear this dress too. I would want to get it properly fitted, and it might need to have adjustments as my body changes. Fashions might be different come the time to wear it.

Yes, I wanted to be as great and beautiful as my sister is now, but that wasn’t going to happen. My sister changed for her date and with nothing special, she already looked beautiful. What she would be wearing was simple and appropriate for the night.

While we’re talking, Cousin Molly who married Keith Connors called. Rachel turned on her laptop and we were soon looking at pictures from the wedding. Molly looked even more beautiful than Rachel, especially in her wedding dress. There were pictures of Rachel and Mom, and each of them is beautiful. Finally, I see a picture of me. I’m not fully comfortable seeing pictures of me, but I did look pretty. Somehow I felt good that I probably even look prettier now. I know now the appearance of breasts was now really me. My complexion was now more naturally that of a girl. Makeup helps but it isn’t needed the same as before.

Rachel had turned on the camera on her computer. It is nice to see and visit with Molly. She seems pleasantly surprised, “Jessie, you’re changing and I like what I see.” Molly and Keith would be coming for a visit in a few weeks and wanted to know if we’d go to a beach on Lake Michigan with them. She says, “Keith has a cousin who is hoping to visit while we are there, will that be okay with you Jessie?”

I told her, “It will be especially nice since I won’t be grounded then.” Needless to say, Molly asked about me being grounded.

Molly smiles and said, “You’re a normal girl wanting to be more grown-up than you are. Take your time there are more boys and maybe even a girl or two. Do you still have eyes for your friend Tami?” I hadn’t remembered that she knew. “You still find yourself attracted to her or other girls some don’t you?”

I look to Molly on the screen and Rachel next to me. I’m glad it is a safe time and place to acknowledge. “I’m not sure where I’m at. I find myself very attracted to Tami and another at the ballet that is a dancer two years older than me. But I find I like the attention of Jacob and Matt as well.”

Rachel says, “I remember a time like that.” Molly says, “Yes Jessie, I can’t speak for someone having boy parts, but you do sound like my sister and several girls I know.”

Mom walked into the room, behind us and Molly saw her. “Aunt Terri, Keith, and I are planning to come for a visit in two weeks.

Mom said, “Right now Jessie’s grounded I’m not sure you would want a fickle teenage girl around you.”

Molly said, “I did not get to have enough time with Jessie around the wedding. I know Luis the man who did our wedding hopes she will come back not only for her wedding but after she has become herself. He says she is like a beautiful bird that was not meant to ever be caged.

"I asked him what he meant and he would only say she would blossom. But he also said, ‘Caged she would never have birthed a child.’”

Mom and I simultaneously said, “That is impossible.”

Mom said, “Enough said for now. We will talk more when you come. You can join Rachel, I, and Jessie’s friends who are helping her to become a teenage girl.”

Before Molly said good-bye, “I have a friend who sews and makes dresses and costumes for Broadway. She is making a dress for Jessie.”

Mom interrupted, “We can’t afford that.”

“She’s not selling it to you. She’s making it for Jessie. It will be a pretty skater dress, appropriate for summer dance. She’s been contracted to work for Chicago’s summer theatre. She will do the last of the fitting when I get there. She has already started working in Chicago. Please relax, it is something she wants to do. Jessie, I think you will love it.”

Thursday, I went to ballet practice and I told Marti I would miss next week as I would be away seeing my cousin.

She told me, “I am glad you told me because I will work you extra hard today and give you something to practice next week at this time.” We were halfway through the morning session and Marti has me stretch into a full split. The pull I felt as I was fully down into the split came with a burning feeling.

She says, “I am glad you went down all the way; I am sure you’re feeling some pain. Now roll your right leg around, turning your body and coming to the left leg and continue until you are back into the full split again.” She smiles as I followed her direction, “You told me you’re in transition. We might as well inform that little man down there that a girl is to occupy that spot.” I blush, I was sure the other ballet girls heard what she said. They began to sing, “Goodbye Jeff, goodbye Jeff, we hate to see you go.”

One practice was made tough enough, but true to her word Marti had me stay for another session. She shared a sandwich with me and I drank some water. To begin the afternoon session, Marti had me sit as she slipped my feet into a nice pair of ballet slippers. “Now young lady, we will be taking you, steps further. Seek to become comfortable in your ballet shoes, tights, tutus, and your hair up in a bun whenever it is appropriate. You need not always agree with what we ask. If you want to be a ballerina there is a discipline and mentality that you are responsible for. Someday, I hope it will seem natural to you.”

It was fifteen minutes into this practice when I went up on my toes doing a twirl as Marti instructed me. I wanted to cheer, instead, I was asked to do it over and again; five more times and it was hurting. I cried to Marti and all she said, “Yes, I know the feeling. Some night when you are dancing for us, I will not excuse you to stop. I will ask you before we end this session to go up on your toes again. No disrespect but I do not see most boys being as tough as girls.”

We spent more time at the ballet bar for one foot or the other upon the rail, stretching myself in directions and further than I would have been able even the week before.

Come, the end of practice, Marti asked, “Jessie, your feet are down to a size 7, while I am happy, quite frankly I am surprised. I wanted to make sure you are not doing anything you should not be. I also want to ask, if your change might continue?”

I gently took off my new ballet slippers asking, “Ms. Stone, do I pay you or someone else for my ballet slippers? I need to thank whoever got them, I really appreciate it.”

She beamed, “You are welcome; they are my gift to you. You are the first dancer who has started with me as her instructor.”

I had called my Mom to pick me up and I kept my slippers out of my bag. I hugged them to my breasts. Mom greeted me and hugged me as I got in the car. Mom said, “I didn’t know you were getting ballet slippers today. How much did they cost you?”

“Mom, Marti Stone bought them for me, they’re brand new aren’t they beautiful? She said They’re her gift to me because I’m her first new student, isn’t that neat.” I remembered and joyfully shouted, “Mom, I got up on my toes today. I did it so much they began to hurt but I became okay with that. It was so neat.”

My mother said, “I don’t remember you ever happy that you hurt and worked through it. So what makes this special?”

“Mom, I complained, but Marti told me when I get good enough to dance in a program. I might hurt but she can’t afford me or other girls to stop because it hurts. I guess that is regularly true for ballerinas. I really didn’t see me becoming that good, but now I think maybe. I didn’t know how much ballet takes. It is tougher than any sport I’ve played. I thought ballet dancers had it easy because they make it look easy.”

Mom said, “I am proud, I think you’re growing and becoming a young woman.”

I said, “Mom there’s a problem. It is more like I’m becoming a woman but I’m not growing. These ballet shoes are a size 7. I think the only parts of me growing are my hips and breasts. I thought my hands were bigger than Tami’s, but now I could wear her rings.”

Mom sat me down. “Jessie, I noticed the same things. I called Dr. Kim and she wants to see you next week. I don’t think it was possible but since puberty hadn’t really started before, I think you might be developing as a girl.”

Mom said, “I also heard from Molly, and Keith is having her come here to see us and her family a week early.” She will be in the Chicago area on Saturday to see her family. She wants us to come Monday for her friend to do the final fitting of the dress she made for you."

Monday, I was excited, disappointed, and excited again as I met Avery. She knew as soon as she saw me that my hips had developed more than she planned. The dress is a beautiful red satin. Months ago I wouldn't have dared to wear it; being embarrassed as Jeff. I was afraid it wouldn’t be mine. Avery soon had me down to my black panty and bra. She had planned to take out the darting. Where the dress was to have pleats they would either be smaller or I’d have a smooth skirt.

“We are in luck young lady, you seem to have grown smaller and your hips seemed bigger more in comparison to your smaller frame. I am going to take it apart and I will change it over to a regular skirt without the pleats. Your mother says you were a good dancer before and are now taking ballet lessons. Would you mind if I took you to the Steppenwolf Theater and have one of my friends dance with you?”

Even up where I lived, we knew the Steppenwolf was special. I said, “Couldn’t we just go someplace that has a regular dance floor?”

She smiles, “We could but that is not where I’m working. Go take a shower and freshen yourself up. I will get this pressed out, ready to wear. Do you have a good pair of heels? If you’re a 7 you can use a pair of mine or Molly’s.”

I was out of the shower dried and in front of the bathroom mirror with a towel wrapped around me. Avery poked her head in, “Please put your makeup on like it is for the evening. Stage lights like to bleach out the color of your skin.” She stayed around to make sure I did things right. I was uncomfortable but she said, she was around the stage and dress work. She was used to seeing bodies of all shapes and stages of clothing.

I think she mostly wanted me to hurry.

Avery warned me, “Two of the men can dance you out of your shoes. I will watch closely to make sure they don’t take your virginity along with it.” Molly and Rachel would go, Mom wanted to go, but she wasn’t invited. Molly’s mom encouraged my mom not to go.

We had to sit as Avery had to help others as well as act as a dance extra. Another female dancer came to check me out, more exactly the dress Avery hand made. I got up and Cassie picked at my dress, felt how it laid on my body. Then she took me down in front of the stage. She started twirling me, moving me in and out and I was following her as we danced together. Finally, she said, “Young woman, I am not only impressed with the beautiful dress but with you as an upcoming dancer. Who has taught you?”

“I’m sorry but I just kind of went along with following you. If you told me what to do, it would not have been so nice.”

She said, “Avery was smart in introducing her work this way. We are not easily impressed, but seeing it on you and you look so sharp helps. After he is done rehearsing, would you like to have Gregory enjoy a few dances with you?”

I said, "I don’t know if Gregory would really enjoy dancing with me. He seems to have his pick of women.”

Cassie laughed lightly, “Don’t worry he’s a flirt and likes dancing with as many pretty women as possible. Don’t worry we will have someone dance with your sister and Avery’s friend so you won't be alone.”

While Gregory was bigger than me he was not as big as I thought. He moved like lightning, was strong with power in his legs and arms, but he was also as graceful as any woman I had seen. It was a while before we danced. Molly, Rachel, and I were excited just watching them on stage.

Finally, they were done for the day and Gregory was cooling off and dried himself. He said, “I know you are a young teen and I won’t seek to offend you or do anything inappropriate. I saw you with Cassie earlier. How about if we do some sultry stage jazz dancing? You just follow and trust me. If I twirl you or push you out and then extend my arms and hands to you, come running and jump into my arms.”

I was afraid I was going to embarrass myself or flop down on the stage. But he was very good and it seemed natural to follow him. I could tell many of the movements by the music. One time Greg whirled me away and extended his arms. As I ran and jumped, he caught me in his arms and held onto me as we made two revolutions. I ended up leaning back in his arms and he had me dipping backward in his arms as we ended that dance.

“Woe, girl, you are neither as young nor untrained as you pretend to be.” The next dance was simple and just for fun.

The last dance had different steps but was pretty much like the first dance. Greg did warn me that he would twirl me once, head over heels in his arms. I was to be careful with my legs so I did not kick him. Once he had us back to back and as he dipped down forward I rolled over his back. As he came up he swept me through his legs and back again lifting me in the air.

I was not ready for the emotions that well up inside of a girl. I found myself giving him a big kiss as the dance ended. He held me and our kiss lasted. I could feel the heat of our bodies as well as the beating of our hearts. I apologized as did he. Greg finally broke the tension, “I will need to remember ending the dance with a kiss like that. The other dancer might not be ready, but I think the audience will love it.”

Others came over, some checking the dress and others like Rachel questioning where I learned to dance like that. I said, “He and Cassie just told me to relax and do the best I could.”

Avery quickly took me aside, “I don’t mean to embarrass you but either your hymen tore or your period has started. I should have you change your panties and use a shield or napkin.”

With tears, I said, “That can’t be, I must be hurt.” Molly was back with us by then and knew the impossibility as well as the reality. She took hold of my hands looked me in the eyes, “Remember Luis the Mayan Wise-man at Riviera Maya. I know he talked to you as well as me. Somehow it is true.” She pulled me in for a hug and she asked, “Is being a girl what you’d really want to be?” My eyes were filled with tears as I nodded yes.

I said to Molly through my crying, “Avery said it could be I’m having a period or my hymen is torn. How can either be?”

Avery hears and asks, “I don’t understand. Why would you be surprised? Was this her first time to menstruate was it?”

Molly looked at Avery, “It is hard to explain, but she’ll be okay. Yes, we are surprised it happened now.”

I was afraid to allow Avery to help me, but she helped me step out of my panties. And held a damp wipe saying she’d be gentle. I was surprised Avery didn’t gasp when she saw me. But then if I bled, I shouldn’t have been surprised that I now had a vagina.

It was fifteen more minutes before I was clean and together again. Rachel wanted to talk but Molly and I wanted to get home before we said anything. Avery insisted on driving me back.

I was tired and emotionally wrung out. I was lying down in Molly’s old room in a pair of her teddy bear pajamas when Mom came and checked on me. It felt awkward to have my Mom check me in this way. Yet, I wanted her and I prayed for the impossible that I was really a girl.

Mom said, “Well young woman, I’m neither a nurse nor a doctor but I believe you have had your first period. Somehow you are a girl. I’m not sure if there is any sign of your boyhood or not. We have an appointment with Dr. Stoults on Wednesday. I think she might want to see you tomorrow.”

We had not planned to stay overnight, but with Molly’s dad away it was a nice girls’ night. With a warm shower, I enjoyed my time with Rachel, Molly, and Avery talking about our time at the theater. I am sure if I tried dancing like that again it would never happen, but it will be a great memory.

I had called back to Tami and we talked over an hour. She knew about Gregory and The Steppenwolf Theatre and would not believe I danced with him there until Rachel spoke with her. I told her I had a bigger surprise. I would not tell her until I was at home and could speak to her in person. Truly I needed to go to sleep and wake up to be sure it was true for myself.

I woke up before 6:00 in the morning but could not get back to sleep. Indeed, I’m physically a girl. The way I felt was different; I knew I wasn’t transitioning anymore. I prayed thanking God I had changed and prayed I would never wake up to the nightmare of having changed back. If I had to I would continue to transition. Part of me liked it, I love being Jessie.

I went down to the kitchen and Aunt Ellen and Mom were both there. They wouldn’t ask, but I saw their relief to know I was Jessie.

Mom had talked to Dad and told him to stay at home, she had a surprise. All she’d say was that it was a good surprise. She did tell him about my dress and going to the theatre.

We were home by 10:30 a.m. Neither Dad nor Robbie would at first believe the story but neither wanted proof.

Tami was over after lunch and since she had seen me before this was now a good shock. I couldn’t believe it she stared at me and said, “O how pretty.” She asked me if it felt any different, I thought that was a silly question.

She did touch my breasts and said she could even see the difference there. Mom poked her head into the room, “You have a 5:00 appointment with Dr. Stoults. We might have to wait, but she definitely wants to see you today.”

“Mom, Rachel’s coming, would it be okay if Tami came along? She kind of was there when this all began.”

The bleeding hadn’t stopped, but neither was it real messy anymore. It was hard waiting today, but we painted nails, redid our makeup and I changed clothes once more before we left for the doctor.

The nurse was surprised I wasn’t asking for another hormone shot. She was very surprised when Dr. Kim began to check me like any other girl.

Dr. Kim said, “I don’t know how to explain the change. My records will show I examined you and verify that you are healthy, and a fully functioning female. We will wait a month or two before I am willing to prescribe any form of birth control, but I want to warn you to be careful. You can no longer consider you unable to become pregnant.”

Mom asked if my hymen was intact. Dr. Stoults had not checked but did confirm I was, in fact, a virgin.

We went out for dinner to celebrate.