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Viewing Note: This story should be viewed with the Edwardian Script ITC font installed on your Windows platform in the c:/Windows/Fonts directory. Microsoft Word installs this font automatically.

Editor's Note: Jenny Walker has graciously allowed me to represent her original story No Half Measures on BigCloset. Originally published on BigCloset Classic, this story was migrated over to BigCloset TopShelf on 2005-02-02. Due to the original story presentation format being unsuitable and unwieldy for most portable devices (each part being over 1 meg in length), the story is now being broken up into single chapters for easier reading. The original Movements will be indicated on their respective chapters. The first chapter of each Movement will retain the original comments and read hits so as to preserve them for the author.

Sephrena Lynn Miller

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Chapter 4
 
 
I woke of my own accord and discerned the faint beginnings of daylight on the other side of the curtains. I felt quite disoriented at first. Probably due to the long hair half over my face which I soon realised was my own. And due also to the fact that when I rolled over the pulling sensation on the front of my chest reminded me that I had breasts.

I propped my head up on an elbow and got my bearings. I checked the digital clock beside my bed. Just before 8 a.m. This early morning wakening by yourself lark was getting to be a habit. Whether it was a bad one or not I reserved judgement on just yet. As the memories of the previous day flooded my consciousness I realised I was now quite definitely awake. It was a strange sensation. Almost an anticipation of my first full day as a girl.

I sat on the edge of the bed and decided I may as well go on and get ready for the day. I went into the bathroom and lifted the toilet seat. As I pulled up my nightdress, I realised the incongruity of what I was about to do and couldn't bring myself to do it. I set the seat down again and sat down instead. It just felt more appropriate and I figured I had better get into the habit of it. I chuckled to myself as I imagined the looks I would get if I walked into the gents looking like I did now and hitched up my skirts before the urinals.

When done, I slipped off my nightdress. Taking off the silky material filled me with a sensation somewhat akin to regret, but I shrugged figuring that there would be plenty more nights to enjoy the feeling of it.

I managed to unhitch my corset and dropped it to the floor. I added my panties to the pile on the floor. I looked in the mirror and felt quite strange. Almost disappointment. The perfect illusion of femininity was not as perfect now. In a weird kind of way this moment reinforced to me the correctness of my decision last night regarding the hormones. With that thought in mind I walked straight back into my bedroom and pushed out the first pill from the strip beside my bed. I popped it in and swallowed it.

I could hardly believe the path I was now on but I was never one for beating about the bush when doing something. I wasn't quite sure if I was crazy or not, but in my way of thinking, if you're going to be crazy, may as well go all out and be a raving lunatic.

Going back into the bathroom, I turned on the shower and as the water was heating up, I looked about for something to keep my hair from getting wet. I figured it didn't need to be washed as it was only washed and set yesterday. I found a shower cap and managed to bunch my hair up under it.

Slipping under the steaming jets of water was a great feeling. I soaped my body. My smooth body. It was a strange sensation soaping my breasts. I knew they weren't really mine and they obviously had no sensation in them, but under my hands they felt real.

My skin felt more sensitive to the touch. I didn't know if it was the total hairlessness, the hormones, or my imagination. I figured it was probably mostly the latter option. Stepping out of the shower I wrapped the towel around my waist, but as I caught my reflection in the mirror, I chuckled to myself realising that wouldn't do. I pulled the towel up and wrapped it around my upper body and noted the improvement in decency in my reflection.

After towelling off, I noticed a tube of scented body moisturiser beside the bath. I figured I should use it so I rubbed in liberal amounts all over my body. The fragrance was subtle and sort of floral. After using the scented body spray which I also found on the bath side, I removed the shower cap and shook my hair loose. The feeling of my long hair on my bare back was another new but strangely nice sensation.

Picking up my corset and returning to the bedroom I wondered what I should wear. The same as yesterday? Or was there another option? I spotted a neatly folded pile of clothes on a chair at the far side of the room. On further inspection there was a clean pair of panties, a black top, blue denim skirt and black ribbed pantyhose. There was a pair of black boots with a reasonable sized heel under the chair. I guessed these were all for me.

After fitting myself into my gaff and sliding on the panties, I began to tackle the corset. After a bit of effort I managed to hitch it together around my torso. I began to lace myself into it. Although I was tempted to go easy on myself, I figured it would be self-defeating. So I gave it a bit of elbow grease until I felt my waist significantly constricted. I pulled the rib-knit black top over my head and noted that it clung to my figure quite nicely. After pulling on the pantyhose, I stepped into the denim skirt and zipped it up. It was quite short, just below mid-thigh. The boots were quite awkward to get into, but I worked my feet into them and zipped up the sides. They came to mid calf. I quite liked them I decided.

I checked out my appearance in the wardrobe mirror and shook my head. Even without make up, I looked too good. The girls had good fashion sense too as demonstrated by the outfit they had left for me.

I sat down at the dressing table and pondered what to do as I gazed at my reflection in the mirror. Well, I reckoned I had better give the make-up thing a go. I was going to have to learn sooner or later and I reckoned learning by mistakes would be a part of it. I remembered as best I could what Beth and previously Jools had done to me. There was a full set of cosmetics on the dressing table in front of me. I took a sponge and dabbed on a light coating of foundation, blending it in as well as I could. Then a light coat of powder. After that, things seemed a little harder. I decided that less is best, certainly for this attempt. I brushed a light coat of dusky brown eye shadow onto my lids and applied one coat of mascara. Having managed that without making a total mess of myself, I felt quite proud. I brushed on a smidgeon of rouge and then contemplated the lipsticks in front of me. I selected a shade that looked similar to the one that Beth had used yesterday. A deep reddish-brown. This was where it could all go wrong I figured. Taking a deep breath, I pursed my lips and gave it my best shot. I didn't go overboard and that was probably why I got away with it. I blotted my lips and then inspected my handiwork in the mirror. I smiled. Not too bad I thought to myself. I really did feel quite proud and being honest, I had to admit that I had quite enjoyed doing my makeup myself. I sighed at my appearance. It was definitely Cara Malone looking back at me. I looked hard to see if I could spot Nick Evans, but I didn't think I could make him out.

I grabbed the hairbrush and began the vigorous brushing of my hair that I had been instructed to carry out. I was almost at the hundred when there was a gentle tapping at the door. I cleared my throat and remembering to speak in 'Cara's' voice said, "Come in."

Jools stuck her head round the door. "Oh you're up," she said sounding surprised. "Oh and you're dressed too," she added as she came in.

I smiled at her, "Well, I thought I'd just get on with it."

"And your makeup!" she exclaimed. "Did you do that yourself?" she asked with a little incredulity in her voice.

I grinned, "Sure I did. Is it that bad and obvious?"

"Not at all," she said sounding impressed, "Not at all bad indeed." She stood back and looked me over, "Damn girl, you look good."

I felt myself blush and looked down, but looked back up and said the only thing I could say, but also the thing I felt inside too, "Thanks Jools."

"Well since you're up and dressed and all, ready for breakfast?"

I nodded, "Sure thing," and gave my hair a last few brushes getting it into the shape I wanted. I got up and then almost as an afterthought, grabbed the perfume on the dressing table and gave a few spritzes to each side of my neck. I stood up and noticed Jools grinning at me.

"Like the boots?" she asked with a smile.

I laughed and blushed again, "Yes actually I really do."

She laughed with me, "Come on girl, let's go get some brekkie."
 

*          *          *
 
Beth was already in the kitchen getting things ready. She seemed quite surprised to see us.

"Oh, that was amazingly fast Jools," she said.

"Wasn't it?" Jools replied, "But actually, when I got there, Cara was already dressed and ready, make up and all."

That got Beth's interest, "Really?" she said, wiping her hands on a towel and walking over to me. She nodded and grinned, "Not bad at all girl. You're going to be a quick learner. I think you are a natural."

I half-laughed, half-snorted but murmured, "Thanks."

"What do you think of the outfit? I picked it myself," Beth asked.

I smiled, "I like it thanks."

"Seriously?" she asked raising an eyebrow, "I mean I know why you are doing all this, but do you really like the clothes?"

I shrugged, feeling a little uncomfortable. I pondered and thought about it. I started hesitantly, "Well, I hadn't really thought about it in too much detail. I know why I am doing this, but I guess I have to admit that there are certain parts that I don't mind too much. Other bits totally freak me out. But yes, I like the outfit." I paused and in a quiet voice added as an afterthought, "I think the clothes make me look nice."

Beth smiled kindly and gave me a little hug, "I think they do too. It's totally OK to like them. Hell girl, you're going through a heck of a lot, I think you've every right to enjoy yourself as much as you can."

I blinked a few times and gave a hesitant smile, "Erm, thanks Beth." I tried to change the subject as I was feeling really quite uncomfortable now, "Did somebody say something about breakfast?"

Beth and Jools both laughed and I joined in with them.

"OK, let's eat," Beth said.

I sat down at the table and she poured me a bowl of what looked like muesli, she poured the same for Jools. She then added some dried fruit on top. I stared at the bowl and then looked at Jools. She had a similar expression to mine. I think it was disdain. I let Jools speak.

"Uhh, Beth, what's this?"

"It's muesli with dried apricots," Beth replied.

"Hmm, not really my usual sort of thing," Jools replied as Beth poured us all a glass of fresh orange juice.

"Well," Beth began a little defensively, "you said that you wanted my help for you and Cara to be as healthy and fit as possible. It starts here. Give it a chance; you never know you might get to like it."

"Hmph, I doubt it," Jools said a little sulkily.

I poured some milk onto mine and tried a spoonful. Pretty dry and tasteless. Harmless though. I grinned at Jools who was trying hers. We both struggled our way through it. I wasn't used to any breakfast as I usually didn't rise 'til mid morning. Jools was more of a croissants and pastries person from what I knew of her.

When we finished, Beth smiled at us and offered us some wholemeal bread toasted. Whilst it wasn't that appetising to either of us, we accepted it given the lack of other options. When I asked Beth about the chances of a cup of coffee she said that we could have some herbal tea. Too much coffee being a bad thing and not a great way to start the day and all that. I saw Jools roll her eyes and I smirked knowing how much she lived on coffee.

After we finished, Beth said, "Now since it's Sunday, I'll give you both the morning off, but the exercise program starts tomorrow without fail."

Jools just groaned, but I asked, "Exercise program?"

She nodded, "Yes, get you fit and toned. We'll alternate between morning jogs and indoor aerobics." She grinned mischievously, "It will help you to work up an appetite for your muesli."

Both Jools and I groaned. I wasn't used to regular exercise at all and had a fair idea it was going to be painful. But I had already had a lot of new experiences so far, this would just be another one to add to my growing collection. After we had cleared up the breakfast dishes, I asked what was on the agenda for the day.

"Well," Jools started, "Beth and I are going to Church. You are welcome to come along if you want, but we'll understand if you don't."

"Church?" I said raising an eyebrow.

"Yes," Beth explained, "when we are at home, Mum and Dad like us to go to Church each Sunday. They like the family to be part of the local parish so we go to the Anglican Church in Seaton when we are home."

I thought for a moment, "But your Mum and Dad are away so they won't know either way?"

They both looked at each other and grinned. Jools shrugged, "Yeah, but Mabel would dob us in if we defaulted. Besides, it's sort of become a habit. It's been a while since I've been. I guess it's good for us."

"Like muesli and exercise?" I asked teasingly.

She stuck her tongue out at me before asking, "So what about you?"

I shifted a little awkwardly. I hadn't been to Church for some time. My parents were strict Welsh Methodists and when I was young, Church was very much part of our lives. Since I had moved away, it hadn't seemed that relevant. But to think of going to Church as a woman? It seemed a little hypocritical to me. "Umm, thanks but I think I'd need to get more confidence up first Jools before I could face going to Church as Cara."

She smiled, "No problem, I understand. Will you be OK here without us?"

I laughed, "I think I'll survive. I'll maybe tinkle a few ivories on that rather nice piano I spotted last night. See if I get some inspiration."

The sisters got themselves ready and left dressed very nicely and conservatively in typical Sunday best dresses and I made my way to the music room. That's what I called it in my mind. The view was spectacular. The big bay window looked out over the Devon coast. A cliff reared up just along the coast from Silsbury Manor and I could see gulls circling and landing all the time. The waves down below were crashing onto the sand. It was a dry clear day and the sun was trying hard to penetrate a thin layer of cloud. As I sat down at the stool I just drank in the view for several minutes before coming to my senses again. I began to play. To play anything and everything that came to mind.
 

*          *          *
 
Inspiration was flowing. I had hit upon a catchy melody. I was hamming it up on the piano, but it was made for the guitar. It was on the guitar I was hearing it in my head, but I always found it easier in general to write the full song on the piano first. It was a rocky number and it had ironically arisen from the theme of yesterday's goings on and conversations. 'No Half Measures' I was titling it. I had been humming around a melody as I played and some words were floating around in my head too.
 
 

"Yesterday's hopes are today's shattered dreams,  Tomorrow only brings more,  Are you going to let the world poke fun at your schemes,  And trample them into the floor?

 

It's gonna take no half measures,  Pushing beyond the limit,  No half measures,  Gonna take heart, soul and spirit,  For when you feel it's over and there's no point going on,  Is when you realise what is chaff and what're your treasures,  But if there's half a chance of making it, join me in this song,  Let's kick down the ever-closing doors -- no half measures!"

 
 
I added a few more verses, a melancholic bridge and finished with two rousing choruses, shifting the last one up a key and stretching the limits of my 'new' voice before bringing it to a sultry soft close as I repeated the last line, "So c'mon push open every door -- no half measures!" I stopped and took a breath and then I heard someone clapping from behind me.

I turned sharply thinking that it was a bit early for the girls to be back. Instead I saw a portly lady smiling from the door. I reckoned it was Mabel. She smiled at me and stopped clapping. "You've got the gift m'dear," she stated matter-of-factly in a broad Devon accent.

I smiled shyly, "Erm thanks."

She nodded and walked over. She wiped her hands on the apron she was wearing. "Mabel Finniston. You must be Miss Cara."

I smiled. It was strange to be addressed so formally, but it seemed appropriate from Mabel. "Yes, nice to meet you Mrs. Finniston."

She chuckled and flapped her hands at me, "Mabel m'dear, Mabel it is."

I stood up a little awkwardly as she approached, not quite knowing whether to reach out to shake her hand or what. She stuck out a friendly hand though and resolved my dilemma. I shook her hand and my hand seemed slim and dainty in her large grasp. She looked me over appraisingly.

"You're quite the looker too Miss Cara. And quite a big girl too I see," she was looking at my breasts. She didn't seem bothered, but I felt extremely embarrassed. I didn't know what to say, but she continued on.

"I hear you're down 'ere to write some songs. Hoping to get a record deal with Miss Julie's 'elp." She looked me up and down and frowned a little, "Although I can't says I approves of the length of your skirt m'dear. A little short don't you think? And for a Sunday?"

I fought the almost irrepressible urge to ask her exactly how long a skirt should be to be appropriate for Sundays. In fact I wasn't sure exactly what to say and looking back wished I'd kept my mouth shut, "Erm well I don't have many...long skirts." I had been about to say I didn't have many skirts but reckoned that would sound a bit fishy. However I fear I just ended up convincing Mabel I was some sort of tart.

"Ah well," she tutted, "I guess if you're going to be the music star, I imagine you'll be wearing even less at times than you are now."

I blushed and smiled, dropping my gaze a little as I didn't know how to respond. She chuckled, "Oh come now child, that pouty smile might work on th'on young lads around 'ere, but it'll cut no ice with me. I've known too much of the like from Miss Julie and Miss Elizabeth over the years. Now you go back to your playing and singing, I like to listen to you and I'll have the Sunday dinner ready before long."

I did as instructed and added the finishing touches to my new song. I was well pleased with it. I didn't have the half-doubts or reticence that I sometimes did when finishing a new song. I knew this one rocked and I was proud of it. I sang it through from start to finish and gave it the full treatment. I heard whispers behind me and turned to see Jools and Beth peering in the door.

"Wow," Beth said. "Who sings that? I've never heard it before."

I laughed and stood up. I sashayed over to them and fluttered my eyelids, "Cara Malone sings that."

They both giggled for a moment. Jools spoke, "You mean to say you wrote that just this morning?" She seemed a little incredulous.

I nodded and buffed my nails, "Yes."

She gave a low whistle, "If you can write songs like that as quickly as that, you'll have more than enough material at the end of your time here."

I smiled wistfully, "It doesn't always come as easily Jools." I shrugged, "I was lucky this morning. I was in the groove or whatever. It doesn't often happen, but when it does....," I paused and grinned, "It's pretty damn good, isn't it?"

Beth laughed and turns to Jools, "She's not only talented, beautiful and sexy, but she's modest too."

Jools winked, "Oh we don't want her being modest and I doubt anyone looking like her is really modest."

I caught a glimpse of myself in the wall mirror. I was going to register the almost automatic protest against what they were saying, but as I saw my reflection: my full, feminine figure and my long, shapely legs, my long full-bodied hair and my attractively made up face, well I couldn't deny what they were saying.

What was more disconcerting than the fact of it all was my response to it. As I looked at myself, I felt myself getting aroused. I looked like a sexy woman and I feared I was beginning to like it.

I tried to get my mind back on track by telling them about my encounter with Mabel. I told them about my comment about not having any long skirts and they both laughed. Jools told me that now I had a reputation to live up to and when we went shopping tomorrow for more outfits for me, she knew to get the short tarty stuff for me. I protested, but not too much.

Sunday lunch passed without too much incident. I met Sam Finniston, a wiry silver-haired thin man with a dry sense of humour. Mabel had scolded him for apparently eyeing me up too much. My embarrassed reaction had amused them all no end.

After lunch Jools, Beth and I had taken a long, leisurely walk around their parents' estate. It was large and the cliff walk was breathtaking. We spent the evening all curled up together on a sofa in the family room before a roaring log fire watching a DVD together. Beth advised us to turn in early as she would be giving us an early wake up call for morning exercise. With groans of anticipation, we heeded her advice.

I managed to get myself undressed, my corset loosened and my makeup removed without assistance. I smiled as I slid my silky nightdress on and again revelled in the lovely sensations. As I lay down in bed, I pondered my first full day as a woman. I had mixed feelings. Contradictory feelings. I had to admit to enjoying the way I looked, yet feeling uncomfortable at times too. I had to admit to being excited about the songs that I as Cara was writing and singing. Yet at the moment, down here in Devon, we seemed to be far away from the real world and the thought of having to sing and perform as Cara was exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.
 

*          *          *
 
True to her word, Beth woke me just before 8 a.m. and with a bright and far too cheery 'Good Morning' threw back my curtains. Not that too much light streamed in as the beginnings of dawn were just beginning to become evident. I groaned as I sat on the edge of the bed rubbing my sleep-filled eyes.

"C'mon sleepyhead it's a fresh clear morning, get dressed and let's go!" she said enthusiastically.

"What will I wear?" I murmured with a yawn.

She set down some items on my bed. "I've got what you need. Take off your corset and slip on this sports bra. I've got a track suit top and jogging pants for you. And some running shoes which should hopefully fit. I'll see you downstairs in 2 minutes." She grinned, "No being a lady and taking half an hour to get ready. Don't bother with make up or anything."

I slipped off my nightdress and corset. I had a bit of difficulty with the bra, but eventually managed to get it on correctly. The jogging pants and track top were a lilac colour and fit me snugly. The shoes were white with pink trim and were a good fit also. I found a scrunchie on my dressing table and pulled my hair back into a ponytail. I was a bit worried about how I would look heading out without my corset, make up or without doing something with my hair. I checked myself over in the mirror. It was worryingly reassuring. No make up, hair in a simple ponytail and a tracksuit. Yet I looked for all the world like an attractive woman in sports gear.

Beth, myself and a sleepy and somewhat grumpy Jools headed out of the house into the cold crisp morning. The sun was just beginning to come up and the sky was clear and blue. Beth said we would just go for a light jog this morning. She headed off and Jools and I followed. She led us over one of the meadows towards the coast and then down one of the paths that led to the beach. The tide was half in and we ran along the sandy beach in the near perfect stillness which was only disturbed by the sounds of our breathing and a few cries from circling gulls overhead. As the sun rose further, its faint rays began to glint on the breaking, rippling waves and were also reflected off the cliff face on the other side. Although I felt like my lungs were beginning to burn, it was almost compensated for by the beauty of the situation. I was not in good shape, but thankfully I was not the first one to protest.

"God Beth, can we not turn back, I'm going to pop my clogs if we go any further," Jools complained.

Beth laughed. She was breathing more heavily now than before, but still seemed comfortable. She was obviously far fitter than Jools or me. "Alright," she relented and turned, "but no slacking off on the pace. Push yourself; it's the only way to get fit."

That was all very well, but coming up the path from the beach, both Jools and I could barely maintain a slow jog. It was a relief to be back on the flat meadow and the sight of the house getting ever nearer was the only thing that kept me going. When we arrived back on the doorstep, Beth was stretching and limbering down. "That was exhilarating wasn't it?" she enthused.

If I had any breath left in my body to spare from the seemingly impossible task of keeping my body alive, I might have actually agreed. But Jools and I were both half-collapsed on the doorstep sucking in air greedily as if it was going out of fashion. After what seemed like an age, but was probably only a matter of minutes, my lungs decided to stop trying to break out of my chest. Jools looked a little less unhappy too. We went inside and despite a vain hope of a more substantial breakfast, it was muesli and wholemeal toast with tea again. Though it was amazing how much better it tasted this morning.

I enjoyed revelling in the hot jets of my shower after breakfast and after moisturising, sat down to dry my hair. I blow-dried it as best as I could and attempted to style it the way Beth had done the other day. The outcome was not too displeasing. Not seeing any other options, I dressed in the same outfit as the previous day and began to do my make up. I kept it simple again reckoning that I could manage that. Again, I was happy with the job I did. I slipped on my boots and checked the overall look in the mirror. "Lord, I'm beautiful," I murmured to myself, half-pleased and yet half-unbelieving still that it was really me. I found Beth in the family room downstairs.

"Cara, you look great. See a bit of exercise and you look radiant."

I laughed, "You look pretty good yourself." She did. Beth was petite with perfectly coifed shining auburn hair. She was more feminine, sensual and graceful in her movements and manner than Jools. And whilst both sisters were both physically very attractive, Jools attractiveness I reckoned was probably more in her assertive confidence and the enthusiasm she exuded rather than in her femininity per se.

"Jools says she's going to spend most of the day in the library on the phone, sorting some of her clients out so I thought we'd get to work this morning and then do some shopping after lunch," Beth explained.

"Work?" I said a little unsurely.

She laughed, "Oh yes. You might look like a phenomenally attractive sexy woman, but we need to work on getting you to act, think, speak and move like one all the time. There's more to being a woman than looking pretty you know." She winked.

I smiled, "I guess you're right. OK so what do we have to do then?"

We went to the music room and started with walking. I spent the morning walking up and down with Beth giving hints and tips here and there. She got me to move my hips more. She encouraged me to totally over exaggerate it whilst we were practising so that from now on when I was walking I wouldn't have to think about it. I felt a little silly swinging my hips so much and taking these little narrow steps, but when I looked at my reflection in the wall mirror, I had to admit that it was very sensual to watch.

"But Beth, I mean swinging my hips so much, I mean isn't it a little provocative looking?"

She laughed, "Well Cara dear, yes it is. And to be honest, most women don't walk quite like that, but let's face it, in your chosen profession, sexiness sells."

I didn't know what to say, but felt myself flush a little again. Then she got me to slip off my boots and brought me a pair of high-heeled shoes. A 4 inch heel I think she said. When I first slipped them on, I felt very unsteady and gingerly took some steps. She encouraged me to keep going until I got more confidence. Eventually I felt a little more balanced and steady, but it wasn't long before the shoes actually started to hurt.

She relented and said we'd practise more over the next few weeks. It seemed that Beth planned to spend each morning working with me on my femininity: walking, moving, gestures, speech, mannerisms, fashion, make up and anything else I would need to know. She next got me working on sitting and standing. The first time I sat down on a chair in the lounge, she pointed out my skirt which was riding up my thighs in a very revealing manner. She taught me how to smooth down my skirt when sitting and standing and made me do it again and again and again. When I protested mildly she reminded me that all these mannerisms had to be totally subconscious and natural if I was going to succeed. She was right.

The time had flown and before we knew it, it was lunchtime. After grabbing a quick, small sandwich with Jools, Beth and I headed out shopping whilst Jools went back to her list of phone calls. Before we left, she handed me the black jacket I had worn the other day and a small black purse. I peeped inside and saw some basic cosmetics, tissues and a hairbrush.
 

*          *          *
 
Beth drove us into Plymouth and we parked outside a medium sized shopping mall. I felt quite self-conscious as I got out of the car, but remembered to keep my legs together. Beth must have sensed my reticence.

"Relax Cara," she whispered to me as we walked across the car park, "you look great, trust me all anyone is going to see is a pretty woman."

I grinned and winked back at her, "Two pretty women you mean." I took some satisfaction from the growing blush on her cheeks at my comment. She laughed.

As we walked down the main thoroughfare of the mall, I concentrated on walking the way Beth had taught me that morning, my head held up high and a half smile on my face. It wasn't long before I noticed the looks I was getting from some of the men I passed. I recognised the look: it was appraisal and appreciation. I felt my heart racing inside of me. It felt too weird to have men looking at me and barely concealing the desire in their glances. But what was more surprising was some of the looks that the women gave me. Somewhat disdainful and quite unpleasant. I began to fear that perhaps some of the women could see through me. I mentioned this to Beth and she sniggered.

"Oh it's not that they see through you," she half whispered, "let me explain. Quite a few women have difficulties with an exceptionally attractive woman. Particularly one that is more attractive than they are. That's why they are looking at you like that, they are comparing themselves to you and coming off worse." She shrugged, "It doesn't bother me, don't worry I won't look at you like that."

I gave a little snort, "You definitely won't, you're far prettier than I am Beth."

She put a hand on my arm and inclined her head, "Now come on Cara. Time for a reality pill. Let's cut the crap now. I'm flattered that you think I am pretty, but face it, you are stunningly gorgeous. That is why you are going to be a big success. Oh yes, you are musically gifted and have a wonderful voice. But combine that with how sexy and beautiful you look? It's a winning combination and few have it."

I swallowed and felt uncomfortable. I wrinkled my brow a little, "But Beth, it doesn't seem right. I mean me being...," I forced myself to say it, "me being beautiful, you know with me being really..." I left the rest unsaid knowing she knew what I meant.

She shrugged, "Who cares? The reality in this situation is how you look now. I don't know, perhaps this was always meant to be." She smiled at me, "Just relax and actually enjoy it, I mean the numbers of cute guys who have been checking you out while you've been obsessing -- hell I'm jealous." She winked.

I smiled and sighed, "Alright. I guess you are right."

She nodded, "I know I am. Now what do you want to get first?"

I raised my eyebrows and after a momentary pause said, "Beth, I really have no idea what all I need to get. You're going to have to help me out big time here."

She smiled and gave her hands a little clap together, "Just what I was wanting to hear. OK shall we start with lingerie?"

I winced, "Do we have to?"

She giggled, "Yes come on, let's get the most embarrassing part over and then you can enjoy yourself."

We went into Pretty Woman, a shop I can safely say I had never been in ever before in my life. I was worried that someone was going to hit an alarm button and shout that there was some sort of pervert man in the shop, but of course that didn't happen.

The assistant who served us gave no indication that she thought I was anything other than how l looked. She measured my bra size for me and I did find it a little embarrassing. Apparently I was a 36D. I did feel a little self conscious and almost cursed Jools and Beth for giving me such large breasts but I had to admit to myself that I was becoming quite partial to them. I tried to rationalise it: most guys like large breasts. Yes, but not on themselves, an annoying little voice said inside my head. I ignored it.

We gathered a collection of different styles and colours of bras, stockings, pantyhose, nightdresses and panties. I was extremely glad for Beth's help as I wouldn't have had a clue. But she educated me at every step as to the different choices and reasons for choosing them.

When it came to paying, I realised that I had no money or anything in my purse that I could pay with. Beth caught on to what I was thinking, "Don't worry," she murmured, "We can sort it out later, it's all taken care of for now." She handed over her credit card. I made a mental note that I must make sure I sorted both her and Jools out for the expense they had already gone to.

We then headed to a modern boutique across the mall. I browsed through the racks of clothes with Beth. It was really quite amazing the variety and different styles of clothing that women could choose from. In a sense it was quite simple for men: shirts and slacks. Not much variation really. But this was different, each rack brought a new style, texture, colour, length. Perhaps this was why women found shopping more interesting than men.

I had to admit that I was fascinated to a degree, and somewhat overwhelmed. I was glad Beth was with me as she interjected little hints and tips when I was looking at various items. "Too frumpy." "Too old for you." "Too young for you." "Too tarty" I tried to see if I could spot the patterns that identified these flaws but I wasn't too sure that I could. We did pick out a number of items: tops, blouses and skirts.

As we took them towards the changing room I had a sudden rise of panic. It felt wrong to be heading into the ladies' changing rooms. But as we were about to go in, I saw myself in the long mirror outside and felt reassured by my appearance. Beth came in with me to help me. I tried on everything and it must have taken about 20 minutes at least. Must be why women take longer at shopping I mused to myself. Most of the tops were quite tight fitting and most of the skirts were on the shorter side.

I mentioned this to Beth and she grinned at me, "Well Cara, we aren't dressing you for you to be a nun, or a business executive. The way we figure it you should get used to flattering clothing that will suit your image. Not cheap or hooker-like, but certainly sensual and attractive."

As I checked out the latest outfit on myself I think I could see what she meant. It was a black knit polo neck with a short black and white checked skirt. It was flattering and sensual. I felt myself getting turned on and felt mortified although I was sure Beth wasn't aware of anything. She did smile at me though.

"You like it, don't you?" she asked softly.

I laughed, "Is it that obvious?" Hoping that it wasn't obvious in the way that I was feeling lower down.

She nodded, "You don't have to be ashamed of liking and wanting to look good."

I grinned, "Yes I like it. It feels nice, it looks nice -- what's not to like?"

We left the store with the top and skirt and headed on to the next one. After visiting a few more stores, we were becoming more and more laden down with bags and had collected up about 5 or 6 new outfits including several jackets and coats. I realised that we hadn't bought any pants and remarked on this to Beth.

She giggled, "Well yes, I was wondering when you would notice. It's not that you're never going to wear any pants of course, but Jools and I reckoned you should become completely at ease in skirts and dresses first. I mean you know how to wear pants already."

I nodded and grinned, "Yet again, you have a point. But I haven't bought any dresses?"

"Yet!" Beth added as she wheeled me into another shop. "Now then," she continued, "if the lady wants a new dress, the lady gets a new dress." She giggled and so did I.

We looked through the racks until Beth gave a little squeal.

"Found something?" I asked.

"Oh yes," she said holding up a jersey dress which was mostly black except for a white band around the middle.

I raised an eyebrow, "Why is it white like that in the middle?"

"Come on and try it on and let's see," she said.

We went back to the changing rooms and I tried it on. It was a lycra and wool mix and it clung to my figure. The white band accentuated my narrow waist and contrasted against the black which outlined my breasts above it. It did look very fetching I admitted to myself. I admitted this to Beth also. Needless to say, we bought it.

By this stage, I was getting tired and as comfortable and lovely as my boots were, my feet were getting sore. Beth looked a little tired too. "Are we done?" I asked.

She grinned at me ruefully, "I wish we were, but we still have to do the shoe stores."

I sighed and she continued, "Although we could stop for a quick coffee and sit down?"

I was all for that, so we headed for the food court and I gratefully rested my feet and relished the taste of the bitter coffee. We chatted about this and that -- mainly clothes actually. I didn't know that much about women's clothing yet, but I certainly knew a lot more now than I did before and I was learning all the time.

I noticed a man in a black suit sitting at a table several tables away. He seemed to be looking over at me occasionally and then looking away if I would look up. Beth had her back to him. I leaned forward almost conspiratorially and whispered, "Beth there is a man back there and I think he is checking me out."

She giggled and whispered back, "Really? OK, here's what to do, to see if he is watching you for definite: uncross your legs, stretch and then shift around a little in your seat and then slowly cross your legs again. Watch for his reaction."

"I can't do that," I hissed back at her.

"Course you can, come on, do it!"

I sighed and then sat up straight and stretched catlike, raising my arms up into air and then uncrossed my legs, repositioned myself on my chair and then slowly crossed my legs over again, pulling my skirt down as I had been taught. I sneaked a sideways glance over at the man and saw his eyes fixated on my legs. I almost sniggered and then he caught me looking at him and he smiled at me before looking away embarrassedly. I told Beth about the effect I had on him and she giggled and snuck a glance at him despite my protests.

"Oh he's cute, well dressed, rich," she whispered back animatedly.

I shrugged, "Well I don't know about the cute part, I don't think I can judge that." I wasn't attracted to him, that thought was almost repulsive. But I did feel a certain rush from knowing the effect I had on him.

I looked up and then leaned towards Beth, "Oh my god!" I hissed.

"What is it?"

"He's getting up and coming this way, I think he's coming over, what do I do?" I hissed urgently.

She had no time to reply though as he paused alongside our table. He was looking at me with a sheepish smile on his face. He was wearing a black tailored suit, white shirt with maroon tie. He was tall with short black hair. He coughed and I looked up. I smiled reflexively.

He spoke, "I'm sorry, I think I owe you an apology."

I raised an eyebrow, "An apology?"

He shrugged and looked a little awkward, "Well it's just that you know, well I was staring at you and I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable. I almost couldn't help it, it's just that, well I'm sure you know, but you are very attractive."

I felt my cheeks go warm and I sort of bit my lower lip and blinked a few times with my head slightly lowered. I looked back up at him and smiled again, "Umm, thank you and it's OK, I didn't feel uncomfortable."

He gave me a broad smile and looked like he wanted to say something else, but he just sort of waved and said, "Alright then. Err goodbye," before turning and walking off.

I turned my attention back to Beth who was grinning at me from ear to ear.

"What?" I said defensively.

She slowly shook her head and smiled, "You really have no idea do you?"

I shook my head with a puzzled expression so she continued, "That shy little smile, flutter the eyelids, look down thing that you did? It totally worked like a charm on him."

I protested, "I wasn't doing any shy little thing, I just didn't know what to do." I paused, "I've never, well obviously, I've never had a guy talk to me like that and I don't know how to react."

She laughed, "Well, you're learning fast. That shy innocent response is a killer girl and he was dying to ask you out."

I gasped, "He was not..." but I couldn't think of anything else to say.

She gave me a knowing look and then grabbing the bags, began to stand up, "Come on and let's go get some sexy shoes for you."

We went to a fairly classy shoe store. "Is this place not a bit expensive?" I asked her softly as we entered.

She nodded, "Yes it is, but to be honest, for shoes you really get what you pay for and I've found it's not worth skimping. You get cheap shoes, they feel like cheap shoes and they look like cheap shoes. And you'll not wear them much."

I nodded and added that titbit to the store of information I had been building up all day. We browsed about a bit and Beth pointed out a few pairs of shoes. Some black court shoes with a small heel, a nicer pair with platform heels and then a classy black patent pair of pumps with a 4-inch heel. I sat down and tried them on. The court shoes fit well and were easy to walk in; the platform heels weren't too bad either. I felt a bit unsteady in the high heels and mentioned this to Beth. She told me to look in the mirror at how they made my legs look. I looked and I think I saw what she meant. They made my legs look even longer, the curves more defined, my calves looked more sculpted. I liked it.

"With legs like yours, you are made for high heels," Beth said and rolling her eyes, "my goodness, I could really get an inferiority complex alongside you."

I laughed knowing she was partly teasing me, "I see what you mean Beth. They aren't the most comfortable and I still feel a bit unsteady, but I guess I could get used to them."

She nodded, "We'll practice more and more in higher heels. You look so good in them, I want you to feel perfectly at ease in them."

We were going to pay for them, when a pair of boots caught my eyes. Beth noticed me pausing and followed my gaze. She gave a low whistle, "Sexy."

She was right, they were downright sexy. They were the sort of boots that if I had seen on an attractive woman, I would have had difficulty drawing my eyes away from her legs. They were black suede and looked like they would almost be knee high and they had a high almost stiletto heel on them. "Yes," I murmured, "very sexy."

Beth looked at me, "You want them don't you?"

I shrugged, "I don't know, I was just wondering how they would look on me."

She laughed, "Damn hot I think is the answer to that question."

I hesitated seeing the price tag, "Wow, they're incredibly expensive."

She put a hand on my arm, "Cara dear, compared to what we have spent overall today, it's a drop in the ocean. I think they would look fantastic on you and the way you are practically drooling over them, I know you totally want them."

I grinned at her, "Maybe I'll try them on and see how they fit."

Beth got the attention of an attendant -- a young, male one. He went to see if they had my size and it seemed that we were in luck as he returned with a largish box. I slid the boots up my legs and they felt great as they hugged my calves. I had been right: they did come to just below my knees. I zipped them up and stood up. They were high too. I took a few steps carefully as I got used to them. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and felt a real rush of blood to my head. They looked great and I loved them. Perhaps it was the adrenaline rush that was to blame for what came next. I don't know why I did it.

I walked back over to Beth and the male attendant swinging my hips as Beth had taught me to, I read his name from his badge. "Colin," I said smiling sweetly, "what do you think? Do they look alright on me?" I fluttered my eyelids a few times. This time it was totally deliberate. Instantly a red flush crept up from under his collar and he stammered, "Uhh y-yes 'mam. They do look alright."

I gave a little pout and feigned disappointment, "Oh, only alright?"

He looked more flustered, "Umm, w-well, no 'mam, they actually look fantastic on you."

Beth was almost biting her tongue as she sought to contain her mirth. She nudged Colin and half-whispered, "It's OK, you can stop looking at her legs now."

Now I had to try and fight down the giggles. The poor boy looked like he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole. We put him out of his misery and told him we would take the boots. He scurried away to bag them and ring them through the till. Beth poked me in the ribs, "You are so bad."

I giggled, "I just can't believe it. A few smiles and bat the eyelids and they go to jelly? Are all men so pliable?"

She smiled and squeezed my arm, "No darling, only when the woman doing the smiling and eyelid batting is like sex-on-legs-with-boots."

I gasped and poked her back, "Now who's bad." We quietened down as Colin had returned with our bag and receipt. He looked sheepish. I smiled sincerely at him and thanked him for his help. His goofy smile in response almost made me burst out laughing as Beth and I made a beeline for the exit together.
 

*          *          *
 
We headed home and dumped over a dozen bags in the hall.

"Been busy I see," Jools commented as she came out of the library.

"Too right we have," I replied, "I don't think I have ever shopped as much as that in my life."

"Enjoy it?" asked Jools curiously.

Before I had a chance to reply, Beth cut in, "Oh yes she did indeed, but I'll tell you about that over some food. We're famished."

And she did. As the three of us ate the casserole and rice that Mabel had left for us, Beth related all the details of the shopping trip. Particularly focussing in on how cute the man at the food court was and emphasising how foxy I was. I sat and smiled with a near permanent blush on my face as I let them jabber away.

Beth was heading out for the evening and I headed into the lounge to relax and watch some TV. Jools had another phone call to make, but she joined me not much later. She sat down and didn't say anything. She looked pensive. I noticed and muted the TV. "What's on your mind Jools?"

She smiled at me and shrugged. I knew from her expression though that she had something to say. "Come on Jools, out with it."

"OK," she said reluctantly. "Well I know I said I wouldn't ask, but I'm not trying to be big brother or anything. But I do need to know. Are you taking the hormone pills?"

"I don't mind you asking so don't get all worried about it. Yes I am taking them," I replied matter-of-factly.

"Right," Jools said as she nodded. After a short pause she went on, "Well, you see, it's sort of like this. My doctor gave them to me sort of on one condition."

I sighed and smiled at her, "OK, come on, lay it on me."

She grinned ruefully, "Well she said she wouldn't normally give out treatment without seeing and examining the patient first, but she said she'd make an exception. However if 'my friend', that is you, decided to take the hormones, she wanted to examine you after the first 4 weeks of treatment and before any more treatment would be offered."

So that was it. I was going to have to see a doctor. I nodded slowly. "Alright, I guess that makes sense. Although I'm not over the moon about having to go and see a doctor about all this. But I guess if it had to be done. So what's your plan?"

Jools smiled, "Who says I have a plan?" When she saw the look on my face she laughed and said, "Alright. Here it is. We go to Sony on the morning of Monday 23rd and if things work out, that is if we get a deal, well I was sort of thinking you'd probably be thinking about continuing on with the hormones. So I have an appointment scheduled for the afternoon with Janice. If things don't work out with Sony and we are dropping this whole idea, well then we can always cancel."

"Janice?" I asked.

"Janice Carson. My doctor, she's an endocrinologist, but you probably gathered that. She's an old family friend and very easygoing."

I nodded, "Well OK, that sounds fine I guess. So if we do go to see her, we need to add her to the list don't we?"

"Yes. But don't worry about it, she's totally trustworthy and anyways as she will become your doctor, she will protect your confidentiality completely."

We chatted some more and watched a bit of TV. Although it was only just after 10 p.m, I felt exhausted. It must have been a combination of the early morning jog and the long afternoon shopping. I gave Jools a peck on the cheek and headed to bed. I took some time to hang my new clothes in my wardrobe and put my new 'delicates' away carefully in a drawer. It was quite an impressive array of clothes and must have cost a fortune. I had to admit that looking at the outfits I had bought, I felt a growing anticipation about wearing them all. When I fell into bed, it didn't take long before I fell asleep.

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