by Melanie Brown
Copyright © 2023 Melanie Brown
“So tell me about your girlfriend.”
Just before Gary could answer, the mob of boys at the other end of the cafeteria exploded in wild laughter and they all stood up to leave.
Gary chuckled. “Saved by the bell.” He started to get up.
I frowned at him. “We still have a few minutes. Can’t you tell me something about her? You know everything about me.”
“Jealous?” Gary smirked. The mob of noisy boys were approaching us. “There’s not much to tell. Her name is Mandy and she’s nothing exotic like a cheerleader. She’s an art student. Is that enough?”
As I stood up, I said, “I was just making conversation.”
Gary chuckled. “I’m just giving you a hard time. I… Oh, I wonder what’s Jeff doing coming here.”
I looked up and saw Jeff entering the cafeteria with a couple of other boys. I turned my back towards him. “Crap! I can’t let him see me as a boy!”
Gary asked, “Shouldn’t he know?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know.”
Several boys from our group greeted Jeff. I tried to blend in with the group so he wouldn’t notice me. He was just about to clear us when Gary said, “Hey Jeff! Hey bud, I have a question.”
Everyone stopped walking towards the exit. What the hell is Gary doing? I tried to keep my back to Jeff.
Jeff said, “Gary. Make it quick. I’m meeting with some folks.”
Gary said, “It’ll just take a minute. There’ve been some questions lately about how much the football team fucks the cheerleaders. Do y’all do that or is it just a rumor?”
Jeff frowned. “Really Gary? You’re going to ask something stupid like that in front of everyone? I don’t have time for this.”
Gary stepped in front of Jeff. “Just hold it. The word is that we lost last week’s game is because you were banging that little blonde so much that she distracted you from the game. So is it true? Are you tossing games because of some bitch?”
I’ve never seen Jeff’s face get so red before. He looked like he was about to explode. He growled, “That’s a fucking lie. Who’s saying that? Look. Ronnie is a very sweet little girl who I’d never hurt in a million years. Whoever is telling you otherwise is full of shit. Now get lost!” Jeff then angrily pushed past Gary.
Someone in the group of boys said loudly, “Hey Bobby. You’re full of shit.” Everyone laughed.
Bobby said, “Of course he’s going to say that. I stand by what I said.”
Gary laughed. “Give it up, Bobby.”
Bobby growled, “Regardless. I’m going to nail that little blonde after the homecoming dance!”
Someone shouted, “You’d better! I have money riding on this!”
After we all got down the hall on our way back to class, I punched Gary in the shoulder. “What the hell was that about?”
Gary shrugged. “Nobody believes Bobby anymore.”
“He hasn’t changed his mind about me,” I said looking down at the floor.
Gary chuckled. “So? Unless he’s willing to commit a crime, you have the ultimate authority over that.”
“True.” I nodded.
Two hours later, Mr. Slovenski woke us up by saying, “Okay, guys. We’re done here. Thank you for not giving me too much trouble. Leave your cards with me. You’re dismissed. Try to be quiet out in the halls.”
I breathed a sigh of relief as I closed my eyes to relax. Why am I relieved? I walked out of the class with all the other boys. I paused by the window to look out on the sunny day. Someone poked my arm. I turned to look and it was Gary.
He didn’t really stop. He just pointed at me as he walked by. “You’re the only boy I know who has to pretend to be a boy. See ya tomorrow, girl.” And he hurried away.
Is that why I feel relief? I don’t have to pretend anymore? But how is it pretending to be who I actually am? I frowned at the reflection of me in the glass of the window. I sighed again. Under my breath, I said, “Girl, you’re headed for a life-time of therapy.”
“Did you say something?” I turned around to see Bobby looking curiously at me.
I felt my face turn red. I said, “Oh no. I was just mumbling to myself.”
He shrugged and walked towards the boys’ room. I need to stop mumbling out loud. I caught myself smiling as I watched Bobby walk away. Damn he’s cute. Despite what he’s said, there’s an attraction I can’t put my finger on.
I needed to relieve myself, but I didn’t want to follow Bobby into the restroom. I thought what the hell? Nobody’s around. I’ll use the girls room.
I know it sounds silly since I’m not actually a girl (and I don’t want to be… seriously!) I felt like I had just entered sanctuary. All my muscles relaxed and I sighed out relief. Until one of the stall door opened and a girl from my Home Ec class exited the stall.
“Hi Ronnie!” she said pleasantly. “What’s with the get up?”
I looked down at my inappropriate clothes for the restroom I was in. “I didn’t have anything else to wear.”
She giggled. “I’m jealous. You look cute no matter what. See ya tomorrow in class.” And she left.
I entered a stall and sat down.
“Well look at you!” giggled Nova as she and Steph were standing outside the school entrance. “Compensating for anything?”
Steph laughed. “I think she’s trying to purge any boyness from her! Two days as a boy must have crushed her.”
“Come on, guys,” I said waving my arms. “I didn’t go that overboard did I?”
I had come to school dressed in a very pretty floral print sundress.
Nova laughed. “You look really nice, Ronnie. It’s just a lot more feminine than usual from you.”
I sighed. “Well, it’s too late to change now.”
Steph shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. You look cute.”
As the three of us started to enter the school building, Nova looked over at me and sighed. “Why do I suddenly feel so masculine?”
I stopped walking and said, “Okay. I’m going home to change!”
Nova scowled at me. “Oh come on, Ronnie! Lighten up. You’re a beautiful girl. Deal with it.”
Steph laughed. “Stop being such a drama queen, girl.”
I giggled. “You guys are right. I actually like wearing dresses.”
Nova laughed. “As of this moment, your boy card has been permanently revoked.”
I just shook my head as we took our separate ways to our classes. Just as I was about to enter my first class, a girl I didn’t know smiled at me and said, “Oh. I love your dress!”
Later that morning on my way to Home Ec, I was rounding a corner in the hallway, stupidly reading a joke just texted to me and not paying attention, that I collided with another student. The boy I ran into was in a rush and I was knocked to the ground. I wasn’t hurt, but you don’t really want to be sprawled on the floor while wearing a dress. I dropped my book bag and my phone went skittering across the hall, getting kicked a couple of times by accident.
I quickly pulled my legs together so no one could get a free peek up my dress while I was on the ground. I looked up and gasped. The person I’d run into was Bobby! He started to look pissed that someone had run into him and then he looked down at me. He grinned.
He walked up to me and extending his hand to me said, “Oh! I’m so sorry! I should watch where I’m going. Are you okay?” I took his offered hand and more gingerly than I thought he would, helped me to my feet.
“I’m okay,” I said as I brushed dirt from the back of my dress. “Thanks for helping me up. I shouldn’t have been looking at my phone.” I looked around quickly. “Which I seem to have lost.” Out the corner of my eye, I saw a girl pick up something from the floor. She walked over towards us.
As I was picking up my book bag, she asked Bobby, “Did one of you drop this?”
Bobby snatched my phone from her grasp and gruffly said, “Yeah, thanks.” When I stood back up, Bobby wiped the phone off on his shirt and held it out to me. “I think this is your phone.”
I smiled at Bobby as I took the phone from him. “Oh thank you so much! I was worried it had gotten stolen!”
There was an awkward silence for a moment. Needing to get to class, I said, “Again, I’m sorry for not paying attention.” I giggled as I smiled at Bobby.
Smiling broadly, Bobby said, “I’m glad we had a little run in. I never would have met you otherwise. My name is Bobby, by the way.” Oh yeah, that’s right. I was a boy the last time we met. Sorta met. Kinda.
I smiled an embarrassed smile and after trying to rub a new scratch from my phone’s case, I said, “I’m Ronnie. Nice to meet you.” I grinned dopily at him. Damnation. He has such deeply blue eyes. I felt like I could just dive right in. I looked down at my feet and giggled again. “Well, Bobby,” I grinned when I said his name, “… I’m about to be late for class. See ya.”
Bobby nodded as he continued to smile at me. “Yeah. I need to get to class too. It was sure nice meeting you. And that’s a very pretty dress.”
“Thanks,” I said as he passed. I turned to watch him hurry down the hall. I smiled slightly as I hurried to my own class.
“I love your dress,” said Susan as I set my salad tray down at the table with the other cheerleaders.
Maggie grinned. “Did you survive boy’s health okay? It must have been awful for you. Locked in a room filled with boys talking about sperm and penises.”
I chuckled. “It wasn’t quite so pornographic as all that.”
Nova asked, “Does that one boy still plan to do you at the dance?”
I laughed. “Bobby? I don’t think he plans to do me right there on the dance floor, but yeah. That’s still his plan.”
Steph scowled. “That pisses me off that he’d think he can just do what he wants with you. What a douche.”
I shrugged. “If you don’t count wanting to do me on the dance floor, he’s actually kinda nice.”
“Nice?” Susan grunted. “Is this the same Bobby who thinks he’s God’s gift to women?”
Maggie asked, “Doesn’t that fit most guys?”
Susan shook her head. “Not all boys are ‘bad boys’. But that definitely describes Bobby. You should definitely stay clear of him.”
Nova looked across the table and frowned. “Speak of the devil.”
Grinning toothily, Bobby approached our table. “Ronnie! So we meet again!”
“Hello, Bobby,” I quietly cooed.
Bobby walked up to the table opposite me. “Twice in one day. It must be fate!” exclaimed Bobby.
Steph glared at Bobby and said, “Or maybe you just go to the same school?”
Still smiling at me, Bobby said, “That too. But hey, any reason you’re sitting here with the cheerleaders?”
I swallowed my bite of salad and giggled at Bobby. “Well duh! I’m a cheerleader.” He knows that of course, but he doesn’t know I know he knows that.
Bobby’s eyes went wide. “No way! You’re a cheerleader?” He stared at me intently for a moment. “Oh yeah! You’re that cute little blonde cheerleader, aren’t you? Your boyfriend’s that football player whats-his-name?” He knows who Jeff is.
I shook my head. “I don’t have a boyfriend.” Why the hell did I say that?
Bobby shook his head. “That’s hard to believe.” He paused a moment and then shrugged. “Well, if that’s the case and I know this is kinda sudden but why fight kismet? I know you have a game tomorrow, but afterwards, would you like to go out or something?” Holy shit! He has the cajones to ask me out now, in front of everyone?
I looked over at Nova for help, but she just stared wide-eyed at me. I glanced down at my salad bowl and then back up at Bobby. I said, “Thank you for the invitation, but we have an after game tradition for the squad and the team, meeting at Rosa’s for a late dinner.”
Looking crestfallen, Bobby said, “Oh. Sorry. I didn’t know.” Bullshit. This was a tradition before even Janet was a cheerleader. He stuck his hands in his pockets. He then asked, “Is that just for cheerleaders and the team?”
I should have said “Yes!! With armed guards!” Instead I said, “It’s a public place. Except for alcohol, nobody checks for ID.”
Shrugging, Bobby asked, “Would it be okay if I just dropped by to say hi?”
I smiled at Bobby and said, “Sure! I’d like that.”
Bobby grinned broadly. “Great! I’ll catch ya later.” He then hurried out of the lunchroom.
Tank walked up and stood behind Nova. “Is everything okay over here?”
Nova frowned and pointed at me. “I don’t know anymore. Ronnie seems to have a crush on a bad boy.”
Astonished, Tank looked over at me. “Well shit.”
To be continued…
Comments
What?
Ronnie better get her head together. She's acting like a moth drawn to a flame, knowing fully well the flame is gonna burn her badly.
They know they can survive
Dangerous game...
Ronnie is playing. Especially in a high school setting where the kids can be pretty cut throat and cooping skills aren't as polished as adults (not that Trans Women have it any easier outside of school).
Worried about this foray with Bobby.
XOXOXO
Rachel M. Moore...
Wonder how his supporters will feel...
...Ronnie has begun to give double messages. Will Ronnie be left high and dry if she does it too much?
Jessie C
Ronnie seems to have a crush on a bad boy
eek!
weird
This story seems to have disappeared from the front page.
It's back.
It's returned from a glitch in the Matrix
Melanie
Bad boys
Bad boys have their attraction in that they give a girl a reason to kick over the boundaries surrounding them. It's a way to evade responsibility, or at least, to pretend to oneself that one is doing so. In this, it is very much like forced feminization that allows the transgirl to evade, avoid or deny responsibility for their own desires.
Good story just added another layer to its depth!
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.
Playing with fire…….
Will Ronnie get her fingers burned?
D. Eden
Dum Vivimus, Vivamus
What is it with girls and bad boys?
Ronnie makes yet another mistake. It's too bad that Greg has a girlfriend, as he is such a great guy. I guess she will learn the hard way that Bobbie won't be a nice guy and will end up hurting her.
Better and better writing
Thanks for all these first looks. I can hardly wait to see how you resolve this predicament.
Jill
Gary and Bobby
As this story had developed, my opinion of him has shifted from total jerk to possibly decent guy. As far as Bobby goes ... okay, I can sorta understand why Ronnie is attracted to him, but he also feels ... dangerous. I really hope nothing bad happens to Ronnie.
The coaster screams on…
“A Modest Proposal” avoids the standard tropes we’ve seen in a lot of teen stories by making the main character quite human. Ronnie makes mistakes: stupid and possibly devestating mistakes that I think I we all take a look back and think: “yeah, been there, done that…so glad I did not buy a t-shirt at the gift shop”. Ronnie’s attraction to Bobby works in two ways: some girls look to the bad boys and think they can temper them and he is a way she can break from the “little sister” identity that Nova and the other cheerleaders—and herself—have given her. Will she get hurt? Maybe. Will we see Gary save her at the 11th hour or after the heartache occurs. We watch Ronnie’s life like she’s doing. It could be a smooth trip or a train wreck. Either way, we’re in the engine house with her.