“I think that is everything we needed to cover. Any other points?” I said mightily relieved that the meeting was coming to an end.

My team looked at each other but no one spoke until the newest one of the team, Jeremy Ford said,
“So, Frank, are you going to tell us where you are going for your Holidays?”

I smiled. I’d not told anyone what I was going to do for the next three weeks.

“I’m going to the Outer Hebrides. I’ve rented a cottage on the west coast of the Isle of Lewis,” I replied smiling.

“What are you going to do up there?” asked another of my team, Melvyn Sands.

“Not a lot and that’s the beauty of it. There is a long white sand beach just yards from the cottage and not a lot else for miles.”

“Won’t you get bored?” he said clearly not satisfied.

I shook my head.
“I’ll have a few good books to read and my iPod full of music so no, I won’t get bored. I’m going there to chill out. As I said earlier, you lot should be able to handle everything. You don’t need me holding your hands. There is a code freeze on until September so things should be relatively quiet until then.”

I looked around and it was clear that people wanted to get off home. Well, it was almost five on a Friday afternoon after all.

“If there is nothing else then I’ll see you all in just over three weeks.”

I stood up clearly signifying that the meeting was over.

Ten minutes later, the office was quiet. A few trucks were still working in the yard outside. Before I left, I did a final check of the company network and firewalls. Everything seemed to be running perfectly.

Just before 6pm, I called it a day and closed down my laptop. After locking it away in my desk, I picked up my briefcase and left the building.

The early June heat hit me as I walked across the car park to my car. A couple of trucks were waiting for the ‘truck wash’ and one was leaving on a delivery run. The company I worked for ran a 24/7 operation from here, the main depot and twelve other depots around the country. We weren’t as big or as noticeable as the likes of Eddie Stobart but, we moved things for our customers without broadcasting who we were or what we carried. That was our niche in the highly competitive Transport and Logistics world.

I left our base right by the A14 in Northamptonshire and headed West. My home was in the other direction but I had a 7:30pm appointment in Birmingham that I was looking forward to keeping. It would set me up nicely for the weeks ahead.

---

At just after 9:30pm, I left the salon where I’d been for the previous two hours and a bit with a full set of acrylic nails and a much more feminine hair style. My three weeks of living as my alter ego Karen had begun.

It was dark when I arrived home and parked my car. Home for me was a former farm workers cottage near the village of Wadenhoe. Well, it was actually two cottages that had been knocked into one larger house about twenty years before I bought it five years previously. It still had two front doors but only one opened. At the end of the garden was the River Nene and the place was not overlooked except from the air.

For the next day, I transformed myself in Karen. I was in no rush and was being extra careful as I was not used to having long fingernails. The last thing I wanted was a broken nail right at the start of my holiday or to be accurate, my ‘staycation’. I wasn’t going to Scotland but staying put and enjoying my home and garden.

I had a well-stocked fridge and freezer so there really was no need to go out for anything until it was time to return to work.

My home was really two homes. One part was for the male me and the other was definitely for the female me. Softer décor and colours along with a luxurious bathroom where I could relax in a whirlpool bath and enjoy a glass or three of wine. For these three weeks, I would be living in this side of my home apart from when I was cooking. I had just the one large kitchen-diner which took up much of the ground floor of that side of the house.

Every morning, I’d choose the two or even three different outfits that I’d wear during the day. This gave me real pleasure because the male part of me had to wear a boring suit and tie to work. I livened it up with some colourful shirts or ties but mostly, it was drab, drab and drabber. This holiday would allow me to wear whatever I wanted and that included a bikini.

---

By the time the second week started, the male me was really pushed into the depths of my personality. I longed for the day when I could afford to stop work and become Karen, the real me all the time. It wouldn’t be much longer. A couple of years and I could afford to give up being something boring in IT security and be a woman of leisure. These holidays were my dry runs for what was to follow.

I’d just finished washing the dishes from Lunch when I heard a vehicle drive up my gravel driveway. I wasn’t expecting a delivery so I froze on the spot for a second or so. I’d done some washing earlier which was hanging on the line at the side of the house which may well have been seen by whoever it was that had just arrived.

I waited and waited for what seemed an eternity before there was a knock at the front door.

Eventually, it came. Then another knock, this time a bit more impatient.

Finally, a voice said,

“Frank, I know you are there. Something has come up at work and we need you urgently.”

‘Bugger it!’ I thought to myself as I recognised the voice as belonging to Michelle Adams, the Company Chairman’s Assistant.

I was still rooted to the spot, my mind a total blank when she said,

“Frank, the accounting system has been hacked.”

I knew then that I had no choice but to open the door.

I opened the door and stepped back.
“You had better come in then,” I said as the door opened.

“Frank?” exclaimed Michelle when she was all of me standing in the hallway.

“Please go through into the kitchen,” I said desperately trying to keep some advantage.
“Before you say anything, this is who I really am so don’t even start ok!”

“I… I…”

Then she shut up as she looked at me, up and down and up again.

Then she smiled.

“It all makes sense now. I knew that you were different and now I know why.”

I wanted to say something but at the last moment, I decided to keep quiet.

“You look good and… and oh fuck, you look happy. There I’ve said it, you seem at home… Oh shit, I’m not doing this very well. What I’m trying to say is that you seem happy with yourself and that is not how we see you at work.”

I managed a smile.

“Now what’s this about a hack?” I said trying to change the subject.

“You had better read this,” she replied as the smile drained from her face.

She extracted a sheet of paper from her handbag.

I looked at it. It was a printout of an email that had been sent to the Chairman. I guessed that she’d opened it and got the shock of her life.

It appeared to come from an email address in Brazil but I knew that it did not mean a thing.

The body of the email claimed that our customer accounts system had been hacked and the hackers had syphoned off the complete contents and were holding it as ransom. They demanded the equivalent of £500,000 in bitcoin and had even supplied a bitcoin address for the payment.

Finally, it said that we had 24 hours from the sending of this email to respond. The email had been sent at 23:54 the previous evening.

I glanced up at the clock on the wall. It showed that the time was just after two. We had less than ten hours to resolve this.

“What took you so long to do anything?”

“We didn’t know where you were but I took a punt and came over here. I live over in Barnwell.”

Barnwell was a village a few miles away from my home on the other side of the river.

“What is being done with regard to the ransom?”

“There is a Board meeting going on at the moment. They are trying to decide what to do but they want your input before going forward.”

As head of IT Security for the group, I guessed that this might be the case.

“Then we need to go to them. While I get ready, can you call the office and get someone to email these scumbags and politely ask for a sample of the records they say to have taken just so that we can verify their claims.”

“What? Are you going like that?”

It was a sensible question. I was hardly dressed for the office let alone a board meeting.

I smiled.

“Don’t worry, I’ll go and change into something more suitable.”

“But it will take ages to… to…”

I grinned.

“I won’t be going as Frank. I’m Karen by the way. It seems that my plans to retire and live as a woman have been brought forward a bit.”

Her mouth opened and moved but nothing came out.

I smiled and left her alone.

When I got to the safety of my bedroom, I found that I was shaking. All my plans for my holiday had just gone up in smoke. I sat on the bed for a couple of minutes while I calmed down. When my head and heart were clear, I went into my closet and chose something suitable for appearing in front of the BOD.

I chose a charcoal grey suit with a skirt that came just below the knee. It wasn’t too tight and the jacket had sleeves that were just the right length for me. I added some black tights and a white high-necked blouse with a fake emerald necklace.

Once dressed I opened another wardrobe door. Inside was row upon row of shoes. I chose a pair of black court shoes with a 3in heel. Not too pointy but enough for the job in hand. I had to make an impression in a very short time.

Finally, I selected a handbag and filled it with some essentials including a pair of black flats. If it was going to be a long night, I didn’t want my feet to complain and distract me from the job at hand.

I had a good idea as to what had happened and who had done it but I couldn’t verify this without going into the office. I had designed the system to be totally inaccessible from outside the head office. I didn’t like backdoors as they have a habit of being opened by the wrong people. But, my virtual obsession with security was going to be my probable downfall and result in an early exit from the company.

As I contemplated this outcome, a voice came from down below.

“Is everything ok? We should get going!”

“On my way,” I replied.

I took a deep breath and went down the stairs.

Michelle appeared at the bottom of the stairs and went,
“Oh!”

“Michelle, there really is no time to change so this is me from now on. I’ll have my resignation on your desk by the end of the day.”

“Eh?”

“Once this issue is put to bed, do you think that I could carry on with my job? You know what Ray Parks thinks of LGBT people and he is not afraid to show it despite the company rules on the subject.”

Michelle didn’t argue with that. Ray Parks was a Trade Union Shop Steward and a real throwback to the bad old days of the 1970’s. Anyone who wasn’t a paid up member of the Labour Party was the enemy and that included the people he was supposed to represent. Thankfully, the company looked after its employees and he took his frustration out on minorities.

“We’d better take both cars. I’ll see you are the Office,” I said picking up my car keys from the hall table. I was in no mood to spend the next fifteen minutes sharing a car with her. She had a formidable reputation in the company as a ‘dragon’ who got her way and had left a trail of decimated people in her wake.

Once again, Michelle started to say something but I’d shut my front door and was already getting into my car so she thought better of it.

---

Fifteen minutes later we pulled into the Car Park at the Company Head Office. The array of expensive cars parked outside told me that the whole Board must be present. I was lucky and got the last free space. It was actually Michelle’s designated spot but I didn’t really care. I had other things on my mind.

I marched right through reception before the receptionist a young girl name Chloe could react. The Board Room was just down the corridor.

I stopped outside the double doors and took a deep breath. Then I entered.

The room was full of men. One said,

“Yes, can we help you?”

I ignored him and walked up to the company chairman Jeremy Trueman.

“Mr Trueman, I understand that we have been hacked and you need my assistance.”

Before he could answer, Michelle caught up with me.

“Jer… Mr Trueman, this is your head of IT Security.”

“I apologise how I look but once this is done, my letter of resignation will be on your desk before the end of the day.”

“Yes… but…”

“Did we get a sample of the hacked data?”

“I… I don’t know? Michelle?”

“I’ll need to check. Please give me a minute.”

She left us alone. The room was silent. No one was saying anything.

After a minute, I could not hold it in any further.

“What’s the matter? Haven’t you seen a man in a dress before? Don’t worry, I won’t be here long if my suspicions are proved correct.”

Before anyone could answer, I headed out of the room and into Michelle’s Office which was next door.

She was just pulling a sheet of paper out of the printer.

“Here… Is this what you wanted?”

I took it without a sound and looked at the data.

As I read the names and addresses and the redacted credit card numbers a smile broke out on my face.

“What’s the matter?” asked Michelle.

“We have not been hacked. Well, they have not got any real data.”

“Eh? Have we been hacked or not?” she demanded.

I grinned. If this was going to be my last action at the company then at least I’d go down in a blaze of glory.

“Can you print out the email that I sent to the MD on the fifteenth of the month. I copied the chairman so it should be in your email system somewhere.”

“Wh… what was the title?”

I thought for a second.

“Something like ‘recommendations for AI System Implementation’”.

Michelle sat down and tapped away at her keyboard. Less than twenty seconds later, she stood up. The printer burst into life.

“Is this what you wanted?” said Michelle as she handed me the two pages.

I glanced at them and nodded my head.

“Yes, this is it.”

“What now?”

“We go and face the board and tell them what happened. Then I’m done.”

---

Together we walked back into the Board Room. The conversation died as we came through the door.

I went to the head of the table and said in a clear and I hoped a controlled voice.

“Gentlemen, if you would all take a seat I will update you on the ‘hack’.”

Slowly they all took a seat. From the moves that the directors made there was a distinct hierarchy in place. The Chairman took a spare chair and sat on my left. The Managing Director, Charles Brown was on my right. He looked pleased with himself. That didn’t surprise me at all. He always thought himself the ‘bees’ knees’ when it came to managing the company. Everyone under him knew different but he was apparently the ‘golden boy’ and being groomed to take over as Chairman when the current one retired.

Michelle stood by the door looking at me. For an instant, I wondered if she was giving me the once over. I stopped looking at her and concentrated on the matter in hand.

“Gentlemen, you will be pleased to know that the real company data was not hacked.”

Two men wanted to say something. I put up my hand to stop them.

“If you will let me explain then hopefully all will become clear.”

I took a deep breath and continued.

“The sample of data that was sent to us to confirm their hack did indeed come from our network. However, it came from a database that I setup some nine months ago. Think of it as being a virtual ‘honey pot’. It contains valid addresses but the names are from the 1951 census and from a different part of the country. The Credit Card numbers are partially genuine but the first six digits are from ones no longer used by UK Banks. The data is updated on a daily basis using some software that I wrote. To all intents and purposes, it appears as a real live system.”

I looked around. Some of the men had understood it but others didn’t. That was evident by the ‘glazed’ look in their eyes.

“The system holding the database is in our DMZ. Call it a neutral zone that is not directly connected to our real network. I set it up to test the new AI System that our MD is so keen on installing.”

I looked at Charles Brown. The smug look had gone from his face.

“I sent an email to Mr Brown stating that the AI system was inherently insecure and should not be deployed until it had been hardened. It is clear that someone or something has opened a hole in our outer firewall. That in turn enabled the hack to take place.”

I looked at Charlie Brown. His peanuts namesake would have done a runner but he was trapped.

“I copied the chairman on this email. Here is a print of the email.”

I passed the email to the chairman. He read it and passed it around.

While it was doing the rounds, I carried on.

“So, gentlemen, the company has not been hacked. Because of the deployment of the insecure AI System before it was secure is the cause of the loss of test data. We do not have to pay even a bent penny to these scumbags. Our real system is secure.”

I saw a few smiles around the table.

“If you will excuse me Gentlemen, I need to make the firewall secure again.”
I looked at the MD and said,
“After I’ve deactivated your AI System that is.”

Then I addressed the Board.
“Gentlemen, there is one last thing. At my behest and with the full agreement of both the MD and Chairman, we instigated a freeze on system deployments for the summer holiday season. It appears that this agreement has been consigned to the wastepaper basket.”

Then I turned to the Chairman.

“I’ll put my resignation on your desk before I leave.”

Before anyone could object I virtually legged it from the room.

Michelle followed me to my office.

As my Laptop was booting up, she said,
“You were in your element back there. I’ve never seen you like that before. You were strong and in control.”

Then she smiled.
“I liked that.”

I almost shivered at the thought of her being nice to me. Thankfully, the login screen appeared.

“If you don’t mind, I need to concentrate so that I can undo the damage our erstwhile MD has done.”

Michelle wisely left me alone.

It didn’t take long to find the holes in our external firewall and restore the old configuration and remove all trace of that AI System. When that was done, I looked at the logs and found the IP address from where the attack came from. It wasn’t Brazil but China. No surprise there then.

Ten minutes after I’d started, I sent the logs to the printer. My last job was to compose my letter of resignation effective immediately. I printed three copies and with a tinge of regret, I shut down the Laptop for the last time. As the screen switched off, I felt that the last three and a half years of work was disappearing before my very eyes.

I couldn’t dwell on this so I picked up the letters from the printer and signed all three.

I could hear discussions still going on in the Boardroom so I headed for the MD’s office. I put one copy of my letter on his desk. I did the same in the Chairman’s office.

I was just about to leave the building when Michelle found me.

“The Chairman wants to see you.”

“Sorry Michelle. Perhaps I didn’t make myself clear but I have resigned and I’m off home. My letter of resignation is on his desk as well as the MD’s.”

I didn’t even wait for her to reply as I went through the door and out into the cool of the evening.

---

All was quiet at home that night and all of the following day. I gradually came to terms with being unemployed and having an uncertain future especially with regards to employment. Still, I knew that this day would eventually come so I told myself that I had better get used to it.

The weather was still great so I spent some time pottering in my garden. I’d just picked some spring onions and lettuce leaves for lunch when I heard the crunch of tyres on gravel. I had a visitor.

I didn’t hurry back inside the house and after putting the leaves in some cold water I answered the front door.

I wasn’t surprised to see Michelle there but standing by her side, was the company Chairman.

I decided to get in the first salvo.

“In case you had forgotten, I resigned with immediate effect.”

“We know that but there have been a few things going on that you might like to know about?” suggested Michelle.
I sighed.
“You had better come in then.”

I stood aside and let them come into my home.
“Please go through to the kitchen. I was making some Lunch if you’d like some there is plenty to go around?”

Neither of them replied so I took it as a no and that they had something serious to discuss.

“Please sit down and then you can tell me whatever it is that you came to tell me.”

They sat down. Then to my surprise, the Chairman, Jeremy Trueman spoke first.

“Firstly, I want to thank you for sorting out the little problem we had the other day. It gave the whole board a big wakeup call. We can’t thank you enough.”

Then he looked at Michelle. She took the cue.

“The MD is no longer with us. We found that this was not the first time he’d played a trick like this. He did something similar as his last place of employment but it was brushed under the carpet. Well, this time, it is out in the open. We went public with the hack and how he took responsibility with the event. We have involved the Information Commissioners Office who may involve the Police. What he did was reckless to say the least and thanks to you, we got lucky.”

I managed a small smile and thought, ‘thank heaven for small mercies’. The now former MD had blocked a lot of my plans for beefing up security. Then I stopped and though, why should I care? I’ve resigned.

Michelle carried on.

“The events of this week were not the only reason for letting him go. He has been blocking our plans for beefing up the security of our trucks when they are on the road.”

I knew what she meant. It was well overdue given the cargoes was carried.

“As a result, we are looking for a new Managing Director,” said the Chairman.

“and a new head of IT Security,” I added.

“Yes, about that. We’d like you to reconsider resigning. How you appear at work does not make any difference to me or to the rest of the Board. We all know that you are by far the best ma… person for the job and the right person to take our plans forward.”

I had been expecting that.

“We had another Board Meeting this morning and we unanimously agreed that we’d like to co-opt you onto the Board so that security of our data is given proper visibility at the highest level.”

That I wasn’t prepared for.

“We’d also like to give you a salary raise. We discovered that your last appraisal was downgraded from excellent to below average by the former MD.”

I knew that but I never had any proof.

The chairman pulled out an envelope from his jacket pocket.

“This details the new package we have in mind for you. Take some time and read it through.”

I took it.
“I’ll look at it but I’m not saying that I’ll accept.”

“That is understood.”

Then he looked at Michelle.

“There is one more thing and it was Michelle who suggested that we do this no matter what you decide with regard for the offer and that is that Michelle will spend the next two weeks helping you look and act the part of a woman… sorry, I’m not saying this very well.”
He looked to Michelle for help.

“What Jeremy is trying to say is that I’ll help you look and act more like a woman if you would like some help that is. No strings about the job or anything else but I’d like to help your inner woman come to the fore.”

There was not a lot I could say to that. Well, I was stunned to say the least.

“But,” added Jeremy.
“We’d really like you to reconsider your resignation. I only found out about your battles with the MD yesterday. He painted a rosy picture to the board that was far from the truth. We don’t like being lied to.”

As I watched them leave my home I realised that this ‘staycation’ could turn out to be my best holiday ever. I’d been rather ‘hacked off’ when Michelle had turned up but it could turn out that the ‘hack’ was quite fortuitous after all.

[the end]