I can't believe how hard this is.

Did you know that women walk by moving their hips side to side while guys walk more by doing the same with their shoulders? I didn't and walking with a book on my head while having some teacher follow me holding my shoulders killed my thigh muscles something fierce. I got it but it took me far longer than anyone else in class. And the book still falls down. It's not anywhere easy as it looks trust me.

My natural walk was moving more of my whole body than just either my shoulders or waist. And to think next week they want us to try this in heels! Yuck! Part of the class was training in how to speak too. Now that I was good at..sort of. I got into a bit of trouble when I mimicked Ms Bain. Half the class was in fits of suppressed giggles. Ms. Bain was NOT amused hence the walking lesson.

I think come hell or highwater, where does that saying come from, she is bound and determined to make a lady out of me by months end. Id rather peel onions than do this stuff. I'm a guy for crying out loud! Still some of it was interesting though. The speaking infront of a crowd that is next week should come in handy. By the time class ended I was sore but according to Ms. Bain I walked less like a scurvy seadog and more like a young woman. I think she watches too much Pirates of the Caribbean.

Was I ever glad to see mom walk in at the end of class. She just stood their watching me make a fool of myself. I kept hoping she was here to rescue me from the evil clutches of deportment class. Ms. Bain and Mom did chat for a bit though while I was walking with the stupid book. When the teacher finally signaled class was at an end and we all curtsied we were allowed to leave.

When I walked up to mom she had this look on her face. It was a look I had never seen before. I'll try to describe it. Her face was tilted just a bit to the side and she had her eyes squinted while her face had a hint of a smile to it. It was like she glowed somehow. When I walked up to her she wrapped me in a hug that was a little tight.

"Belle you make me so proud." She whispered in my ear.

"Okay mom can you let me breath please!"

"Sorry honey. It's just.. Oh nevermind!" and she put one of her hands to the side of my face. She actually had some tears in her eyes. This was starting to get me worried.

"Can we go mom?" I asked while trying to not hop up and down on my feet I really really wanted to get out of the whole Belle outfit. The walk to the car didn't take all that long and I started to get in foot first as usual when mom stopped me.

"Belle a young lady sits first and pulls her feet in with her legs together so as not to show her panties." I really shouldn't have but I grinned from ear to ear and got in just like normal. Mom just shook her head.

"Belle.."

"I'm Bill remember mom." she looked at me and nodded her head. She was a little disappointed when I said that not much but the hint of a smile was gone.

With my legs together and the skirt giving me a minor wedgie we started the drive home. She didn't speak to me until we got to the stop light.

"Bill. I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have but seeing you as Belle in a deportment class with other girls also dressed in the same school uniform was very touching for me. It made me so proud to see my daughter in a school that I could only dream of when I was a young girl."

"But I'm your son, mom, not your daughter."

"I know and that is what makes this so difficult. Still I'm very proud of you for behaving in the class. Please don't mind me but I'd like it if I could take a picture of you with the girls in your deportment class." She had this faraway look on her face again.

"Yeah whatever mom." As if I didn't have enough problems. Speaking of problems I looked at mom and wondered if now was the best time to talk about Jason. Perhaps not. For the rest of the ride home I mentally review possible ways of bring up Jason and what he had asked. I knew I was far and away out of my depth with him and needed the advice.

Without thinking as we parked in the driveway I got out in a reversal of what mom had tried to get me to do the first time. It wasn't until I saw the smile on her face that I realized what I had done without thinking about it. Nor did I notice how I was walking by swinging my hips. After we got inside I kicked off my shoes and ran upstairs as fast as I could. Once in my room off the blouse and skirt came as fast as I could do it. I hadn't worn the sweater that day.

Dressed in a pair of comfy old sweatpants with a few stains here and there from grease or paint and an old one piece hoodie I went downstairs to supper. It was not till I noticed dads look that I looked down and realized that I had sat with my legs together and back straight while on the edge of the chair.

"Sorry" and I changed to my normal open legged slouched position. It felt wrong to do that and I can't explain why. Mom gave me a look as I put my arms on the table though so that I was still not allowed to do. Sam was amused in her wheelchair but said nothing and we had supper. I did on occasion slide to the side of my chair knees together to help Sam cut her tofu and pour some of the gravy onto it. We did our usual Grace and ate in mostly silence before Mom and dad started the usual chat about work. Things had returned to normal and I was happy. I was Bill at the supper table not Belle even though my bra poked out my breasts I was still Bill.

"Mom what did Ms Bain ask you?" I said while eating my tofu steak.

"Who is Ms. Bain oh you mean Ms Barnes. That's not a nice thing to say about her Bill you should be ashamed of yourself." I would have been if dad didn't start choking on his milk as he got the joke. Mom gave him the look.

"Your not helping Dan! Nor you young lady!"I saw that Sam was trying hard to not laugh as she was shaking.

"Sorry hun but what Bill said was kinda cute. Ehemmm so you were saying she asked you.." Trust dad to diffuse mom. I took my knife and tried to cut some more steak for Sam. So I missed any facial expressions mom might have had.

"Well.. she asked if I would give my permission to have Belle attend a charity fundraiser for the children's ward of the hospital on Thursday."

"That doesn't sound to bad it would be a good experience for Bill.." dad started to say.

"As a maid." mom finished. In my shock I knocked over Sams glass of water a bit and it splashed on the table and dripped down on her lap so she hastily used a napkin to soak it up. Dad stopped chewing his steak and swallowed audibly. I don't think he chewed it much.

"But mom I'm a guy."

"Sally Bill is a boy" We said at almost the same time.

"I know I know" mom said " She explained how they could use the help as more parents had accepted than she had anticipated. Your partly to blame for that apparently Bill." I looked guilty at that.

"But he's a boy Sally." dad repeated himself. His fork still had a piece of steak on it but it wasn't moving.

"Yes but I was thinking that maybe he could help out some other way and not as a maid."

"Oh like a butler maybe" Sam chirped up. I liked the idea immediately of being a suave butler that was clearly a guy.

"Yes... that would work he would be able to help. Do you think she will go for it Sally."

"I think so Dan. Hold on I got the form in my purse with her phone number." Mom got up and rummaged in her purse for a piece of paper and took the handheld off the charger before returning to the table. We all waited anxiously as mom dialed and waited for the rings. I took a little before she started.

"Hi Ms Bai...rnes" Mom gave me a dirty look" Its Sally Thorne calling. Hope I didn't catch you at a bad time. Oh yes Belle's mother. Yes Yes fine thank you. Actually we were just talking... Oh I see well we were wondering if it was possible for Bill to be a butler instead. Oh I see. Okay I'll be right here. No it shouldn't be a trouble we were not planing on going anywhere tonight. Thank you. " and she pressed the button to hang up.

"She is going to see if she can get a hold of the costumers who are providing the uniforms for Thursday and see if they have a butler costume as well. She will phone back."

"Very well. About time we started to put our foot down on this Belle nonsense." And that was the end of the matter as far as dad was concerned. I ate the rest of my supper in silence as I was worried that I might have to wear some maid uniform as a girl. We were well into the strawberry shortcake desert mom had gotten earlier when the phone rang. Mom picked it up and was silent for a bit.

"Yes.. I see .. Well yes Bill has breasts but .. Oh yes I can see how that might .. alright would tomorrow be...oh I see I believe we have a fax machine here somewhere ... alright I'll get them to you as soon as we can then. Thanks again. We would love to its for charity after all thank you."

"Well" I asked dad gave me a look I think he wanted to say it first.

"She can get a butlers uniform for you but she needs your measurements tonight as they will have to alter it. The maid's uniforms are mostly for size but the butler requires a bit more to fit she says."

"See Bill all you have to do is put your foot down and be a man." Dad says with a grin. I hope he is right. But... doesn't seem like I have all that much luck lately. Still its for the children's ward.

Taking my measurements was easy really mom used her measuring tape on me to fill out the form that Ms Bain had given her. It took awhile as there was a lot of measurements on the form. After I was done mom made me a bubble bath. I had not had one since I was a kid and for some reason I really enjoyed it. Mom even came in to wash my hair, I didn't need her help and I splashed her playfully. She returned the splash and after a small water fight in the bathroom we were both wet and laughing. All my tension of the day had gone. How do mothers do that anyways they just know what to do. Once I finished washing up, it didn't take me long, I helped her dry the floor.

Mom followed me into my room after she changed into her bathrobe and had me sit on my bed while she played with my hair and a brush. It felt nice and I really relaxed for the first time in days.

"Feel better kiddo?" She asked me.

"Yes mom I do thanks" I gave her a hug before she tucked me into bed in my borrowed sleep shirt. It's not a nightie.

"Your welcome sleep well sweetheart. I'm so proud of you." she said as she flipped off the light and closed my door.

I went to sleep that night with a smile on my face as I thought about how this might help poor Bethany. My dreams were filled with a small running girl with pigtails holding my hand.

For some reason I was in that darn golden dress and couldn't find my pants.