Bridges 26

Chapter 26

I come out of what was a dead drug induced sleep. You know that sleep where you just know you were out of it entirely. That’s a bit unsettling or it’s always been that way for me and I’m floaty in that body stoned kind of way.

I hear C.C.R.’s Midnight Special dropping away to the sounds of the base radio stations chatter. I’m hurting and thankfully I know where I am and I’m not freaking out. I close my eyes again not sleeping but I don’t know, if you’re military you’ll get this.

As much as I’ve been through, seen, done there’s nothing like this. I’m actually slowly smiling at the banter back and forth between the announcers and them reading off the news and sending shout outs to our people out there in all those places all over the world and the sound of cadence being called out while jogging in the distance, the dull roar of the engines of turbines leaving and landing on the airfield.

There is nothing like being on base.

Reality slowly settles in as the drugs level out and Ow…well ow is not the word for it really. I feel split, split in a place where, I’m not ever feeling split. It not to put too fine a point on it feels like I tried to vault a parking meter and landed right there and everything was uhm…pushed well you get the idea only it feels like they didn’t remove the meter.

I wait until the nurse comes to check in on me not bothering with the call button because I know the job and as I’m not really in earth shattering pain or anything serious it’s just better for the staff to get to me when they get to me.

The nurse comes in and smiles at me. “Morning Captain, how are we feeling this morning ma’am?”

“Fine, uhm Captain?”

She points to my nightstand where my medals and my rank increase are sitting posed in its folder. It’s a huge deal and not at the same time. When you get out in the field as a military nurse you come out of training as a lieutenant and taking my experience and everything I’ve gone through and signing on for more as I’m recovering getting to Captain.

It’s nice.

The pay will be even nicer really.

The nurse is cheerful and friendly and she asks me about my pain levels and all the usual stuff be fore getting me some water to sip at since the safe time’s past for me to have liquids and she says. “You have some visitors, you uhm have an interesting family there.”

“Yeah, but they’re awesome and I love each and every one of them.”

“It’s nice that they came and that they stayed.”

“Some of them are from out of province and they dropped everything to come for this. Honestly I’m still getting used to being in a place in my life with people this good.”

“Well if you don’t mind me saying captain there’s a lot of people who seem to think pretty highly of you.”

I’m pretty sure that I’m blushing. “Uhm thanks, there wouldn’t happen to be this drop dead gorgeous blonde bombshell out there would there?”

“You mean the pacer in the RCMP jacket?”

“Yeah, she was pacing was she?”

“Oh yeah, nail biter too huh.”

“Yep, that’s my fiancée. Her thumb wasn’t it.”

“Yeah it was kind of cute too. I’m not really into the girls myself but she’s a looker, congratulations.”

“Thanks, I wasn’t either at least not until I met Cass.”

“I’ll go get her.”

“Thank you please.”

I sip my water and listen to the base radio some more and just had my eyes shut for a second when I feel her over me, smell her smell, just Cass’s own smell and baby powder scent secret and the smell of her make up.

Then there’s the soft supple perfect feeling of her lips kissing mine and her taking a taste right from my soul. It’s one of those kisses. It’s that kiss you dream about as a girl when you’ve just seen or read sleeping beauty only it’s my girl kissing me and it’s ten times better that the stories that used to dance around in my head.

There’s something shaken loose…me, little me, younger me before the bastard touched me and sent everything spiraling into the mire of being molested and abused.

I can remember this small cheap metal framed day bed in the house but I’m in a blue dress and my stuffies are all set up to watch things happen and I’m there all prim and properly laid out on it waiting for my kiss.

Which I feel but can’t remember but it’s not that bad though as that little memory flare up turns into Cass’s kisses.

I open my eyes and smile at her and she smiles back at me and its good, it’s good in that she makes everything better kinda good.

“Hey Cunt…” She smiles saying it fondly to me.

“Guess that fits now huh?”

“It’s why I said it…welcome to the club.” She gives me another kiss. “You know I’m just joking right?”

“Duh, and it was absolutely sick really. That must mean that you’re getting used to base life waaaay too fast.”

“Nope, I just naturally have a sick and twisted sense of humor.”

“Oh…I know, that’s one of the reasons that I love you.”

We’re kissing again and just taking our time with it. You know its true thought in these kind of jobs like we have even in civilian jobs like in a hospital or working as an EMT and stuff like that. You develop this odd, thick skinned sense of humor that most people would look at you like you’re kind of a sick person.

It’s a laugh or cry thing and if you can’t see the funny sides of these things eventually these jobs will eat you up.

Cop and a nurse…

Really, it’s a cliché thing for a reason.

I actually kind of love the normalcy of fitting into a stereotype.

I break our kissing. “Maybe we should let the others in honey. I mean some of them are dropping stuff that they really shouldn’t have to come be here. It’s really awesome but…”

(She kisses me again.) “Yeah, we should really cut them loose.”

…………………………………………………. They really let me have visitors far longer than I should have. I’m mobbed but their careful with me and Bobby and Steve are all sort of squeamish about their own junk. Chris is a sweetheart and yeah I don’t talk about him too much but it’s because he’s never around living up at Fort McMoney (Actually it’s Fort Mac Murray but it’s a big money job boom town even still in this economy so that’s why we call it that.)

He bought me a really nice birthday card with the songs recorded on it and there’s some really pretty words written there about it being my first birthday all over again and three pre-paid gift visa cards. He kisses me on my cheek. “One’s from me, one’s from my girlfriend and one’s from my sister Janey. It’s just to get you some new start clothes and stuff.”

I hug him and the other who got me similar things and chuck says that give him two weeks notice and he and the crew at his restaurant will cook our reception, wedding dinner for free.

I bawl, there’s just so much good I can’t help but to cry because I really don’t deserve my friends.

Cass is there rubbing my back and goes to get me a cup of coffee now that I’ve been cleared for it and Brandon moves into the room and sits in the chair beside my bed and he smiles that smile he has that he hides away from the world under that whole tough guy image.

And ow…and wonder at the same time because I felt my brand new girl part tighten a little just looking into those eyes of his and that smile.

And I can’t help the smile that’s forming on my face and he leans in and kisses me gently, sweetly too but the lover isn’t there but the love is. He holds my hand a little bit and then takes a picture out of his pocket in a small frame and it’s a copy of Mom and Dad. He puts it into my hand then pushes my hand over my heart.

“Looks like their little girl is back finally.”

“Yeah…finally…” I’m crying again but look down at the photo and there’s some tears falling on it.

“Hey Mom…Hey Daddy…I’m Home.”