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The Working Girl Blog #7:
Back from my trip to Minnesota, or Went on a business trip, met a girl, and now I think I'm in love |
Well, I'm back. Dog-tired from the trip, but back...
It was just a fly-in-fly-out kind of thing. Didn't even have time to play tourist, even a little bit. Wait for the arrival of the shuttle at nine thirty. Leave Reagan at twelve (delayed), arrive at Minneapolis at two (St. Paul time), get the rental (no time for lunch), drive to Richfield (we got lost, but that was expected), get to the client's main office by three-thirty. go blah-blah with the customer, squeeze in as many interviews as you can with the sales, warehouse, marketing and IT guys, and then check in at the nearby motel by eight, grab some dinner while discussing the project, and got to bed by one (I think) dog-tired. Wake up at six, check out and get to the client's by eight. Xerox some papers, copy some files, more interviews, leave for the airport by ten, fly back by one, nap on the plane, and back by five. Nap some more in the shuttle and home by six.
Total elapsed time, thirty-plus hours. I'm dog-tired. Woof...
At least we got everything we needed (I think), and if we need some more info, we'll get it from one of their DC or Virginia stores. The good thing about it is that our consensus was that the project seems to be a simple one, and we could probably do it in less than three months. I told my guys not to tell anyone that, though, and leave us some breathing space just in case.
The people at the client's seem to be a good bunch. Their company was hit by the recession, like all others - they had to do some downsizing as well as close some of their branches. But business was coming back (at least for them).
One of the people we met was one of their senior people for distribution - a beautiful, five-eleven girl from Texas. When we met yesterday, I was almost struck dumb - she's that pretty. She was actually good-looking enough to be a Victoria's Secret model. I was wondering what a beauty like this would be doing in a company like that, and doing, of all things, managing warehousemen, drivers and stockroom people, until we saw her in action.
A minor crisis seemed to have developed (there was a delayed loading of one of their trucks.) while we were closeted in the IT manager's office, and the girl was paged on her walkie-talkie. We asked to tag along, and we saw how adept the lady was in managing the crisis. She dressed down the man at fault for the delay, but in a Texas-girl kind of way (sort of kill-with-kindness-and-an-accent). Seems someone decided to use a too-small truck to load the shipment, but the boxes to load were too big so they had to load it by hand instead of in pallets using the forklifts. Anyway, it was a pretty complicated problem and it meant that the shipping will be delayed.
As they were getting the last of the boxes loaded, the girl rolled up her shirt sleeves, climbed up the back of the truck and helped with the loading. All the men there seemed to respect her, and was eager to do what she asked, and I guess it stems mostly from the fact that the girl was competent, and wasn't afraid of getting her hands dirty to do the work.
I re-evaluated my impression of her. Instead of a supermodel, I think she would better fit the image of an Amazon warrior, or Wonder Woman or something. That is, if Wonder Woman was a blonde. And that made her all the more attractive to me.
I think my infatuation with the girl was obvious to everyone, including her. After she freshened up and we continued with our meeting, the girl was in a playful mood, and was horsing around with me, in a friendly girlfriend kind of way, and she kept commenting on my blushing.
After the meeting, during dinner, I tried to see if my reputation with my guys was affected. I think it wasn't, though they teased me about it a little bit, and they were chattier. I think it sort of broke the ice with my guys, and they were less distant. Which was a good thing, especially with "Mr. Personality." Awkwardly, one of the girls tried to ask if I like girls. I sidestepped the issue by saying something like "Yes, I do. And guys, too. Did you see the tall one wearing the jeans?" (I was referring to a tall, good-looking guy who had the room next to the IT director, and was wearing this really tight pair of jeans) The girls went, "Oooh, yeah!" What ensued after that was another kind of discussion altogether. And that was that.
My sexual orientation has always been one of the bigger questions I've been trying to get a handle on, especially after my transition. I guess it hasn't really been settled. My wanting to be a regular girl used to mean to me that I had to be a regular girl in all things, and I truly tried. After transition, I even tried dating men a couple of times, as well as going all the way, but I guess the best way to say it is I just didn't feel it. Does this mean I'm a lesbian, or maybe I'm just not a real girl? Ponder ponder... All I know is that I guess I'm gonna have a lot to tell my therapist about this Saturday.
Anyway, today, I wore heels, a short skirt and a nice lemon-yellow blouse with short flutter sleeves. One of my girls teased me for dressing up for her. I smiled and said I didn't know what she was talking about, and we all giggled about it. Mr. Personality just sighed mock-exasperatedly, and said "women..." Which earned him a good-natured raspberry, and we all laughed. I think I had a good group with me. Remains to be seen if I can retain their respect in the long run. I hope I will.
Anyway, we finished up our morning with them by copying some reference documents and sample files onto a thumbdrive that they gave us, and I spent the morning with the girl at her office, and getting screenshots of many of the applications that they use for tracking inventory and recording orders. She casually put her arm around my shoulder as I sat in front of her terminal, and we chatted while we worked. I wanted to do the same, but I have to be professional, and besides, what if she doesn't like it.
Anyway, enough of this touchy-feely stuff. Suffice it to say, I guess I got a crush on the girl. I'm still not that good at feeling out people, girls, especially. Deep down, I had naively thought that such instant understanding came with the gender. Maybe it doesn't. Or maybe, only born-girls have that instinct. So I don't really know if she's just being friendly, or if I actually have a chance. Oh, well.
Before we left, I gave my card to the VP who set up our meeting, as well as to those that we interviewed, which included the girl. She said that she often went around to their branch stores, and said that she would ring me if she was visiting some of their stores back home. Hopefully, she will.
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Comments
Heels, short skirt and your'e the boss?
Was that a bit exhibionistic?
Geeze, I get accused of it too, and I wear floor length skirts, long sleeve tops and a full head scarf (Hijab). What's a girl to do?
Best
Khadijah Gwen
*earns a raspberry by gentle teasing*
Nothing like a little crush to spice up your life! :)
Besides, you're you, why put labels on yourself?..
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
Orientation
Don't bother with labels - they're often narrow and restrictive. Just go with whatever/whoever your heart tells you, regardless of the person's gender.
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
The Working Girl Blog #7: Back from my trip to Minnesota
Bobbie, I believe that you need to relax and not worry about your sexual orientation. You need to find out who you are. Please don't let other bully you into choosing. From what I can see, you have colleagues who value you. Just be yourself and let nature take its course. Oh, yeah! I like your use of those cute avatars, too.
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
Being a 'real' girl has
Being a 'real' girl has nothing to do with who you're attracted to, so don't worry about it. I did the same sort of thing, trying to push myself to look at guys like that. It doesn't work. Either you like guys, or you don't. I'm not totally closed to the idea, but the only guys I've found attractive were ones that looked like girls! ;)
Saless
"But it is also tradition that times *must* and always do change, my friend." - Eddie Murphy, Coming To America
"But it is also tradition that times *must* and always do change, my friend." - Eddie Murphy, Coming To America
Is that a GUY??
You're pulling my leg. Bad Saless!
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
Yep!
That's a guy. He's a Japanese musician by the name of Mana, ironically. It's not the picture I would have liked to use, but I couldn't remember the name of the other guy I saw a picture of once who dresses like that for his performances. That picture was really HOT! :)
Saless
"But it is also tradition that times *must* and always do change, my friend." - Eddie Murphy, Coming To America
"But it is also tradition that times *must* and always do change, my friend." - Eddie Murphy, Coming To America
Fifi Herman?
Looked a little like Peewee Herman in drag, to me...
Frolicking Fifi
Here's Pee Wee in drag:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KbQluo1gazc
Seems to be having a grand old time of it. Fun, stupid movie...
~~~hugs, Laika
What borders on stupidity?
Canada and Mexico.
.
A completely straight male
A completely straight male friend of mine actually had a huge crush on one of the guys from Versailles for quite awhile ;-) I love Visual Kei bands like Versailles and Mana. He is so pretty!
Gotta watch those Texans
Particularly the gorgeous blondes! They are well worth watching! ;-) I'm two of the three myself. (Blonde Texan. Anybody who calls me gorgeous needs to have their vision checked!)
Seriously, everybody is a combination of Physical Gender, Mental Gender, and Sexual Preference. And for many of us, those are not always in alignment with societal norms. I'm a post-op MTF and a lesbian. My late partner was a GG, happily so, and a lesbian. Her coming from a very conservative religious family (LDS), her situation and relationship with me caused quite a lot of trouble. When she was killed, I was denied the most basic rights a spouse normally has, a situation Obama is (finally) acting to improve (see my blog "Better Late Than Never - I Guess").
So bucking the norms is not for those seeking easy acceptance. But I wouldn't trade our time together for all the acceptance in the world. Based on your comments, this woman seems to be expressing an interest in at least getting to know you better. But the proof will be if she does contact you. Take it a step at a time and see where it leads the two of you.
Love, true love, can be amazingly hard to find. Fairytales and romance novels aside, it can be a rare (and wonderful) thing when you do find it. Don't bet on finding it more than once. If there is something there, you'd be a fool not to give it a chance. Open your heart.
Karen J.
"Being a girl is wonderful and to torture someone into that would be like the exact opposite of what it's like. I don’t know how anyone could act that way."
College Girl - poetheather
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin
Hmmm...
Hey Bobbie...
It's not as important how you feel as much as it is THAT you feel. I relish my moments of wondering and desire; especially the desire part. There are so very many of us who are confused in our sexual and gender orientation that we miss the aching pain of our desire...and our dreams. Don't 'Stain' yourself by taking it easy! Dive into the swimming pool of emotion and desire though it may prove to be cold. It is the tension and coming soooo close to the "edge" that gives me the true thrill of being alive...and in flux.
Truly and Ever the Amazon!!!
Mea the Magnificent