Q as in Questioning

Breathing...Chapter 9

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*Before…

It’s doing all this stuff and having a few more drinks as we’re doing it and talking and it’s Terri’s turn as she talks about some cool people she met and that a couple were girls and that mixed in her head with what I was going through and doing and she figured out that she’s… “Maybe Bi or like Pan or whatever.”

After things are done we’re having another round of drinks then grandma says.

“Why don’t you go and change so we can spend time with Robin?”

I swallow my tea and schnapps. “Are you sure?”

I look at her and Mom and then Dad and Grandpa and they’re all nodding and Terri smiles at me. “C’mon Robin let’s go and get you changed.”

*And Now…

Breathing...Chapter 8

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*Before…

I guy shake hands and half-hug grandpa who does the same and pounds me affectionately on my back.

“Welcome back kiddo, you and me and your dad have a lot of stuff to do when you’re not working.”

I fake a smile. “Missed you grandpa, we’ll get things done don’t worry.”

Then grandma hugs me really tightly and she whispers in my ear. “Later tonight when he’s watching his shows I’m coming over. I want to meet Robin.”

Okay...I’m pretty surprised all over again.

*And Now…

Breathing...Chapter 7

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We stop at Aunt Chris’s place again and drop things off and go and change again and we all take off to have supper heading out to King of Donair.

Yeah it’s something we all like and again one of those things that you have to travel to get when it’s really good like they do it. Home is okay but it’s not going here and after we really stuff ourselves there we head to the mall to go and see another movie that we wanted to see while we’re here.

Mom and Dad go see something by themselves and yeah they look like they’re going to do more than just watch a movie and Terri and Aunt Chris and myself we go and get our snacks and we settle in.

Tomorrow...likely it’ll be time to put being Robin away tomorrow.

*And Now…

Breathing...Chapter 6

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Terri and I get changed and we head off to the spare room and she’s been using that while she’s been living here and it shows with all of her stuff that she’s picked up since being here and we set up a bed in a bag which is pretty cool and loads better than a sleeping bag on the floor and her and I stay up for awhile watching It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia on her laptop.

I fall asleep after the second show.

It’s not too bad a show and kinda rough and raunchy but that doesn’t bother me. It’s just after leaving camp and coming home all in the same day and all the shock and stuff with my family and being full from supper I just couldn’t keep my eyes open.

My dreams sweep me up in visions of Moon lake and of being Robin in my hometown and no one knowing that I’m...was Rob but I’m just the new girl.

*And Now…

Breathing...Chapter 5

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*Before…

I sit back further into the couch and pull my legs under me. It’s more comfortable that you think only it’s just one of those really coded gender deals that guys or non-femme guys aren’t socially allowed to do.

“I’m actually still thinking of all the stuff ahead Dad. What is home going to be like or feel like and I kind of like being Robin but I have no idea how going back to Rob’s going to feel and then there’s school and town and the grandparents and just me trying to walk back into my old life and there’s just so much that’s changed about me.”

“Like being Robin?” He asks.

I nod and pull a small couch cushion in front on me and I hug it. “And the fact I like me, her, I like being Robin and that when I’ve been Robin I’ve met a guy and talked and danced and stuff and it was so much not the end of the world.”

*And Now…

Breathing...Chapter 4

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*Before…

Mom shudders. “Eeeeeww...Gin’s gross.”

Aunt Chris laughs at her. “That’s a reaction that speaks of a story, you’re so going to tell us right?”

I’m looking at Mom and so’s Terri and Mom’s looking at us and has this look on her face. “Holy...you two look so much like you’ve always been sisters.”

I look at Terri and she’s looking at me and she has that looking at me harder like she did before I left.

I step up and hug her. “I’m not sure about so much but I learned that I really want to get to know my sister a lot more…”

She hugs me back and she sniffles. “Me too!...I...I actually missed you when you went away for the summer…”

*And Now…

Breathing...Chapter 3

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*Before…

We start walking in and I keep hugging her but I shift so it’s the girlfriend around the waist hip to hip walking together thing and we get a few feet before her eyes show that she’s realizing that we’re walking like that and she gets this look in her eyes that has all her smile lines in play and she starts back up walking with me and she even seems a little bouncy.

Uh-huh...Okay Mom’s really getting she’s just meeting Robin.

And I’m kind of excited to because this is Mom that Rob doesn’t get to see.

*And Now…

Breathing...Chapter 2

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*Before…

I still am a total flight noob and loving it as much as I’m not ready to go home.

It takes so little time to get to Halifax.

And I do love how the city looks from up here and the harbor and citadel hill...it’s just kind of beautiful in that coming home way.

Then we’re landing and as I’m getting to baggage claim Aunt Chris and Terri’s there as well as Mom and Dad…

Oh shit...what do I do?

I wasn’t expecting our parents.

*And Now…

I Can't Breathe.

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Rob can't breathe and even as young as he is life seems to be closing in really hard.
Until he's given a chance, a very odd chance to get away from everything closing in an maybe find some breathing room.

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