After I had regained my composure, the rest of the day spent with Rachel was pleasant and enjoyable. We took a couple of chairs and a small table onto the deck outside the hut and sat in the warm midday sun chatting about life in general, our time at university, and naturally Rob and the other boys we had met at the welcome night and on the star-watch.

Later in the day Rachel was feeling a bit brighter and more comfortable and so we went out for a stroll around the immediate area surrounding the clearing for our base camp. There was nobody else about, everyone was out working in the forest, so we grabbed a packet of biscuits and made a flask of coffee and had a pleasant picnic sitting on the banks of the lake watching the geese starting to return ti the lake for their overnight stay, and the ospreys snatching fish to feed their young. We couldn’t have picked a more tranquil way to spend our summer break, it was so quiet relaxing and peaceful up here, well away from the bustle and stress of our university life in Newcastle.

The rest of the girls returned late afternoon, tired and ready to sit and relax for a while to recover from all their efforts clearing scrub and planting saplings. Although I had a very emotional day chatting to Rachel, it had been physically relaxing and I was full of energy, so I volunteered to go and see what biscuits and snacks I could find in the canteen and brewed up tea and coffee for everyone while they were all in getting showered, freshened up, and dressed in clean clothes.

“How did you and Lyn get on together today, has everything been ok? On the way out we thought that it might have been better if one of us had stayed with you instead of Lyn” Zara asked Rachel, while I was out of the room.

“Lyn was great, she was really good company. We had a long girly chat sharing our problems. I could talk to her more easily about my period problems than to most of the other girls I know, she is just full of sympathy and understanding. We went for a stroll down to the lake and had a bit of a picnic, just coffee and biscuits. She cheered me up no end and although it can’t get rid of the physical discomfort I am in a much better frame of mind, I’ll probably even join in the work team again tomorrow. You know what girls, I think that our Lyn makes a better woman than Lyndsay ever did as a man.”

“You might be right Rachel, but don’t let Lyn hear you saying that, it may disturb his male pride and we don’t want him to get uptight again, he is just getting relaxed about living amongst us as a girl.”

I returned to find them all smiling and chatting, but the conversation broke off when I entered, I just hoped that Rachel hadn’t said anything to them about my previous experiences as a girl when I was younger and mixing with my sister’s friends. However nobody mentioned it, and I assumed that she had kept her word.

“You missed your boyfriend Rob today Lyn, he was in the same work party as us and was asking where you were. He looked ever so disappointed that you weren’t up there with us planting new trees. He asked if you got the photos of the starry sky he sent over to you ok, he is probably looking for a thank-you reply from you.”

“Just so you all understand, he is not my boyfriend. To be honest although he is pleasant enough and I enjoyed chatting to him, I don’t want to encourage him. Even if things were different, ’holiday romances’ never seem to last very long once everyone returns to the real world. I know you are only trying to wind me up and not seriously expecting me to say that I’m sorry I missed him, but I don’t want to lead him on and I don’t want any of you to encourage him either.”

“Rob told us that it’s a shame but he and his team are leaving on Saturday morning, their booking here is coming to an end, and that we won’t all have much more time together. Before you snap at us again he meant all of us as a group not just you and him. He and his roommates all want to have a bit of leaving party and drinks after dinner on Friday, and it goes without saying that they would like us to be there too. It’s another chance for us all to get glammed up again.I don’t know about the rest of you but after spending the day in jeans and an anorak, down on my knees planting saplings, getting my hands dirty and scratched, I’m quite looking forward to getting dressed up and feeling feminine again.”

“That sounds like a really fun idea, it will be a nice way to end the week and say goodbye to them all.” I chipped in trying to be positive about a bit of a party, surprisingly actually looking forward to getting glammed up again like the rest of the girls.

The next few days we were all back in action again, carrying out repairs to some of the well-worn areas of the footpaths, fitting a handrail to the plank bridge where we had our accident as we arrived, and continuing to plant more young tree saplings Although a lot of the commercial forestry is done mechanically by enormous machines nowadays, the Rangers were trying not to disturb the beauty and tranquility of the area and protect it from the carnage that would be caused by the machines, so we were doing it the hard traditional way, dibbing holes, dropping the saplings in, and then foot-firming the soil around them.

Friday night soon came around and we were all ready to unwind. The farewell party was the last time that we would get to meet with Rob and the boys, as a new crew would be arriving on Saturday afternoon. We all spent a lot of time after we got back from our work-party getting dressed up again to give them happy memories of the time they had spent with us, instead of seeing us in our daily workwear of jeans, jumpers and anoraks. Judy did my hair with her styling brush again, and by the time I had put on my makeup and the new red dress that Judy had bought me, I looked at least as attractive as any of the other girls, although I did feel a bit exposed with the low-cut sweetheart neckline and high hemline of the dress.

“Does anyone think this dress is a bit skimpy for me, I’m not too sure that I am comfortable showing so much of my flesh?”

“At least that makes a change from the normal girlie question, ‘does my bum look big in this’. How many times do we have to tell you Lyn, that is how we wear all our clothes, tight and figure-hugging, especially when we are out to make an impression. Just be careful when you sit down and keep your knees together, you don’t want to go flashing what you have under your skirt. That dress I bought is ideal for you, so stop worrying.” replied Judy, “ Come on girls, let’s go and have a bit of fun and give the boys a treat.”

All the boys had made an effort too, wearing clean trousers and shirts, freshened up with showers shaves and after-shave, rather than the jeans and jumpers and quickly-brushed hair which they had all been wearing for their time at the camp. When we sashayed in dressed to the nines as if we were out for the night at the clubs and bars on the quayside in Newcastle, it definitely lifted the mood of the place and brought smiles of delight to their faces.

After the meal it was time for drinks and a bit of enjoyment. The guitars and the penny whistle were soon brought out again and we all had a bit of a sing-song of a lot of the folk songs and campfire type music until they livened it up a bit and started playing disco dance music through the sound system from someone’s iPad playlist that we could all get up to jig along to.

All that is except me, I had never been a dancer, not having any sense of rhythm and it was a physical impossibility for me to copy the hip-swivelling movements of the other girls so I just stayed in my seat taking it all in. That is until Rob came over, grabbed my hand and almost dragged me onto the dance floor. Awkwardly I moved around in time to the music but rhythm had never come easily to me and I was looking a bit gangly and uncoordinated, until Zara came over and interrupted us.

“Lyn do you mind if I have a dance with Rob, you can’t hog him all evening, go over and join Rachel and Kathy for a while, they don’t have partners at the moment.”

“What are you playing at Lyn, you are moving as gracefully as a baby elephant, watch what we are doing and try to copy us, just loosen up a bit and sway to the rhythm of the music.you are supposed to be having a good time” After a couple of dances I was moving a lot more freely, and getting in the mood, when Zara came back to join us.

“That’s a lot better now Lyn, you actually look like you are beginning to enjoy yourself, get yourself back over there and rejoin Rob and have a good time.”

The rest of the night was a lot pleasanter once I got in the mood and it finished off with a slow smoochy number. Rob pulled me closer with his arms around my waist and I clasped mine at the back of his neck, resting my cheek on his chest when suddenly I raised my head and our lips touched in a light kiss. I looked over his shoulder and the others were doing exactly the same with boys they had paired up with, so I thought I had better respond to him and it all turned into a long passionate kiss. I was dizzy with confusion, I felt a bit breathless and tingly, it was the first time for ages that I had felt like that, and the first time ever that I had kissed a boy. I was hoping that the others were not paired up for a last night of passion, a kiss was one thing, and quite enjoyable, but it just couldn’t go any further for me.

I was a bit unsure how to politely end my time with Rob without any embarrassment for either of us until I was rescued by Zara interrupting us “Come on dream girl, put the poor lad down, we have an early start in the morning, it’s time for us all to go.”

I gave Rob a last quick hug and a goodbye kiss and turned to go with Zara.

“I’ll keep in touch and drop you an email in a couple of weeks when you will be back home Lyn, It’s a shame that I have to leave tomorrow.” he promised, but I wasn’t going to hold my breath, and wasn’t sure that I really wanted to hear from him again.

“How was your first kiss then Lyn, you seemed to be enjoying yourself smooching with Rob, you and him will both be having all sorts of funny dreams about everything that happened tonight?”

“I just can’t please you lot can I, one minute you’re telling me to react like a girl, the next you’re trying to make me feel embarrassed when I do.” which caused them to smile and giggle and I ended up giggling with them too.

On Saturday, while we were all out working, Rob and the boys left, and as we returned we wondered what the new arrivals would be like.

When we entered our hut, we found that we had two new roommates. Claire and Josie, a couple of students from York university who were only to be here for a week to see if they liked it enough to sign up for a full month or more.

Obviously there could now be no mention of my life as Lyndsay with them around, as far as the newcomers were concerned I was Lyn, one of the group of girls that they had joined, and they treated me exactly as they did the others. Their presence curtailed any further discussions about me and for a few days all was forgotten and I just got on with my life as Lyn without regular friendly digs at me. On the Saturday morning they both left, promising to come back another time as they had so enjoyed our company and the friendly way we all had accepted them into our group, and there were just the six of us again.

On Sunday, which was a rest day for us, Zara came back from chatting to Mark. “Hey girls it’s a warm day, does anyone fancy joining me for a swim. It’s not really allowed in Kielder Water but Mark has said that there a couple of more remote tributaries deep enough to swim and mess about in where we would not be seen and would be perfectly safe. All the others jumped at the chance of a bit of relaxing fun away from the camp, it would make our time there seem more like a holiday break.

“I’m not too sure, I’d love too, but I haven’t got a swimsuit and I don’t think I would look right in one anyway, I haven’t exactly got a full feminine figure.”

“Don’t be stupid Lyn, a bikini like we will all be wearing might be taking it a bit too far, but I have a swimsuit that should fit you, you have the boobs to fill it out and your have done quite well hiding your boys’ bits. Don’t take offence at this, but it’s obvious that you have been tucking yourself for the last few days when Josie and Claire were here, and even when you are parading around the hut in your knickers it’s hard to tell sometimes that you are any different from us. Try the swimsuit on but wear a very tight pair of knickers underneath as an added precaution and we’ll see how good you look. Anyway it will only be the six of us, so what does it matter if you are not quite the perfect shape, not many girls have model-like figures.”

Although my waist, hips and backside were not remotely like those of the other girls, The swimsuit looked ok on me, to anybody who didn’t know me I was quite passable as a girl and they were happy for me to go with them. We all dressed for a summer day out, strappy tops and loose light skirts, and made our way around the lake to the spot that Mark had told us about.

We had a really enjoyable day, we had packed a picnic and drinks and spent all afternoon swimming and playing in the water, lying in the sun, and generally having fun. After an initial embarrassment and feeling awkward in the clingy swimsuit, I relaxed and joined in with everything and almost forgot that I was any different to the others.

Late afternoon it started to get cooler and we dressed, packed up, and made our way back to our hut in plenty time to sort ourselves out. Coordinating six girls, and I was now as bad as any of them, getting showered, dried, powdered, hair brushed out and dried, makeup applied, and dressed, even if it was only casual jeans and tops, was a bit of an exercise, but by the time we needed to leave for dinner we were all ready to go.

“We told you when we changed into our swimsuits to put on sun screen but you didn’t bother until you started feeling a bit sunburned. You will have a hell of a tan line tomorrow Lyn, there will be no disguising how you have spent your summer break.

Over the next two weeks our work continued, checking and replacing squirrel boxes, restoring the footpaths, planting more trees, and generally tidying up some of the scrubland areas. It was a lot more physical work than any of us was used to, but we had known what we had signed-up to and threw ourselves into all the activities allocated to us.

But it wasn’t all work, we were there to learn as well as help. We were taken to various hides in the forest to count wildlife numbers as well as to see many species that we would not normally come across. Ospreys and goshawks had been reintroduced some years before and were increasing in numbers and were a delight to see, particularly the ospreys as they swept down to the water to grasp a fish in their talons before soaring back to their nests high in the treetops. None of us were normally bird watchers but we soon learned to recognise many of the extensive range of bird species native to or visiting northern England.

Mainly on night vigils we saw lots of the numerous badgers and their now almost fully grown new-season cubs , foxes, even Pine Martens which had recently made a comeback from over the border in Scotland, and virtually all the native species of bats, including the much rarer Soprano Pipistrelle and the Whiskered Bat. Although I had thought beforehand that I was quite knowledgeable about wildlife, I learned an awful lot more in my time at the camp.

The creation of Kielder Water as a reservoir for the cities and big towns many miles downstream had restricted access for salmon to the upper reaches of the North Tyne river, but there was an extensive breeding centre just below the dam, which maintained the growing population of salmon in the river, which was regaining its reputation as one of the prime sites for them in the country. Mankind over the years had caused untold damage to the natural balance of nature, particularly in the former industrial areas like the lower Tynesde conurbation, but at least now there were major efforts to try to reverse the damage and clean up and sympathetically develop the riverside.

Of course it wasn’t all work and learning we had time for fun too. As well as returning to our hidden swimming area , we visited the more public water-sports zones and all tried our hands at paddle-boarding and canoeing. I was now quite comfortable being seen in my swimsuit and joined in with the other girls without any bother or embarrassment, not thinking that I might be discovered.

Unfortunately all good things must come to an end, and it was soon time to leave. We had a leaving party with the other volunteers and the rangers, and again dressed up for the occasion. We were definitely going to leave a good impression behind of our time there.

The next morning we were all packed up and ready to leave when Mark, our team leader came over to say goodbye.

“It’s been a delight working with you girls, you have brightened up what is sometimes a bit of an unexciting summer with the volunteers, you will all be welcome back anytime. Next year part of your course is to attend a summer school much like you have done here, we would all be pleased if you chose to come back here for that, but you may want to do something different.” He gave each of us in turn a big hug, wished us a safe journey home, and left us to get ready for the next batch of volunteers.

To be continued