Twins, part 11

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Luke grunted as his phone’s alarm woke him from a deep sleep. His mouth was dry and his head throbbed, but what concerned him most was that he didn't recognise his surroundings, particularly the feel of his bed- the mattress was much stiffer than his usual one, the pillow and the sheets thinner than what he was accustomed to. As his eyes started to focus, he was able to take in his surroundings. In his room, in addition to his bed, there was a wardrobe, a desk, his laptop, a large poster bearing the crest of Newcastle United FC… and best of all, his university hoodie, hastily dumped on the back of the chair from where he’d thrown it the previous night. A smile slowly crept across the young trans man’s face as he silenced his alarm and rolled out of bed, stretching his tired muscles as he stared at himself in the mirror on his wardrobe. After what had felt like an eternity, he was back where he wanted to be- at university, and best of all, among his friends. He’d survived the summer break and had come out of it feeling stronger than before- however, as he retrieved the elastic bandage from his chair and wrapped it around his chest, he was reminded that he still had a long way to go.

As Luke was waking up, just a few metres down the corridor, Lucy was already awake and starting her day. The young trans woman let out a sad, tired sigh as she ran her hand over the fine layer of stubble that covered her cheeks- as well as her arms, her chest and her legs. As she removed the unwanted hair, Lucy thought back to her own summer holiday- specifically, the way that she, as far as she was concerned, had caused a rift in their family.

Lucy was under no illusion that it was her transition, rather than her brother’s, which had caused her grandfather to react the way he did. She was certain that that if he had seen her dressed the way she’d been, that she’d have had to bear the full brunt his anger, whether that meant harsh words- or even worse. All throughout the summer, Lucy had been forced to ask herself one question: was it worth it? Was it worth enduring the anger of her grandfather, the fear of being exposed, or insulted, or humiliated just for the privilege of being able to wear a skirt instead of a pair of jeans? Lucy was convinced that the answer was an unqualified ‘yes’, but as summer went on, she found herself questioning her resolve.

However, the summer break had finally come to an end, and as she thought about the previous night, Lucy remembered the smile that had been on her face- and the cute top and skirt she'd worn- as she met up with her friends and spent the evening celebrating in the Student Union bar- even if they had been restricted to just one pre-booked table.

As she applied her make-up for the day ahead, Lucy tried to cling to the feelings that she’d felt the previous night- feelings of happiness and fun, but more importantly, feelings of acceptance and love, and a feeling of belonging, like she truly was the person she was meant to be. In the cold light of day, however, Lucy could only see the stubbly face of a teenaged boy staring back at her from her mirror, almost like it was taunting her that she would never truly be who she wanted to be.

However, Lucy was determined not to let her negative feelings overwhelm her. After ensuring her make-up was perfect (particularly her cat eye eyeliner), Lucy grinned as she pulled on a pair of opaque black tights, followed by a short faux leather A-line skirt and a pair of ankle boots with a chunky 2-inch heel. After eschewing her university hoodie in favour of a plain beige top and a fashionable black cardigan, Lucy grabbed her bag with her books and headed out into the corridor, where she found her brother and her best friend already waiting for her.

“Hey Luce!” Susie said with a grin that was mirrored by the tall trans girl. “Recovered from last night yet?”

“Heh, nearly,” Lucy chuckled. “Probably the last time we party on a Sunday night for a while, and not just because of you know what.”

“Aye, that’s true,” Susie sighed sadly. “Did- did you hear of anyone catching it over summer, like, anyone you know?”

“Not that I recall,” Lucy replied. “You?”

“Nope,” Susie replied, before smirking as Luke rolled his eyes. “Sorry, Luke, are we being too ‘gossipy hen’ for you?”

“…That and there have got to better things to talk about than ‘who did and didn’t catch covid over summer’,” the young trans man replied, smirking as his sister and his friend giggled. “And it’s hardly ‘gossipy hen’ when we barely saw you over summer, heh.”

“We chatted literally all the time online,” Susie reminded her friend.

“Aye, well, that’s not the same and you know it,” Luke said. “It- heh. It kinda felt like, you know, back before we were out publicly? Having to hide ourselves away in our rooms, not being seen by anyone…” Susie and Lucy smiled sympathetically as the young man’s voice trailed off.

“…Lucy, give him a hug,” Susie ordered, making the tall trans girl giggle as she obeyed. “I would, but, you know, social distancing and all that.”

“I’ll let you off this time,” Luke chuckled as he wriggled free of his sister’s hold. “Are we meeting up with the others for lunch?”

“Yep, already texted Priya,” Lucy replied. “It’s gonna be good to get back into the routine, you know? Forget about all the other shit going on in the world right now.” And I don’t just mean covid, Lucy thought to herself as the small group headed toward the lecture hall.

The trio had only barely taken their seats, though, when they were interrupted by the voice of one of the friends they'd made the previous year.

“H- hey, guys,” the soft Seattle accent of Phoebe Adams said, smiling nervously as the three Geordies turned to face her. “Umm… room for one more?”

“Sure!” Lucy replied with a smile as she, Luke and Susie moved up to make room for the tall blonde girl.

“Ya don’t need to ask in future, you know,” Luke said with a supportive smile. “It’s not like we own the row, heh.”

“And it’s not like we didn’t hang out last year, too,” Lucy reminded Phoebe.

“Well- true,” Phoebe replied. “But- you know, covid and all that…”

“I’m not coughing,” Luke shrugged. “Did- did you get it over summer, Phoebe?”

“Ah- no, I didn’t,” the American girl replied. “My parents, on the other hand… I mean- don’t get me wrong, they’re fine, they recovered quickly and only had mild symptoms, but- yeah.”

“But- but you didn’t get it, though?” Lucy asked.

“Well, no, I’d have struggled to get it when I didn’t go home over summer,” Phoebe said with a sad sigh as Lucy cringed.

“Ah- sorry,” Lucy mumbled.

“It’s not your fault,” Phoebe said with a shrug, though her face betrayed her emotions. “It’s not like you invented covid, heh. And hopefully, I’ll be able to go home for Christmas.”

“Well, if you can’t, my mum always makes too much food for us,” Susie said with a warm smile that her American friend mirrored. “Assuming Boris and Chris Whitty let us, anyway.”

“Thanks,” Phoebe chuckled. “No offence, but hopefully it won’t come to that, heh!”

“None taken, and fingers crossed!” Susie said with a grin as the lecture hall began to fill.

After the lecture- which consisted mostly of an introduction to the second year of the course- the four students made their way to the university cafeteria for lunch, waiting for the arrival of their other friends. Within minutes, they were joined by Priya, Claudia, Gavin and Kieran, and in no time at all, the spirits of everyone at the table were as high as they'd been before the summer break.

“Hi, fellow ‘bubblers’!” Gavin chuckled as he sat down at the table, making sure to keep a safe distance between himself and the other students, who were all sat close to others on their respective courses. “Won’t hug for obvious reasons, heh!”

“No offence taken, for obvious reasons!” Lucy chuckled. “I hope you’ve stayed safe over the summer?”

“Like I had much of a choice?” Gavin replied with a derisive snort of laughter. “Fortunately, covid doesn't affect people with MS any worse than everyone else, but that didn't stop my family from wrapping me up in cotton wool all summer.”

“Ugh, yeah, can imagine,” Susie sighed. “Had your first lecture yet?”

“Yeah, didn’t really learn anything though,” Gavin replied. “I’m more looking forward to getting signed back up for all the societies tomorrow, though.”

“Totally,” Priya agreed. “Is everybody else going for the same societies they were in last year?”

“That’s the plan,” Lucy replied. “I mean, LGBT society’s a must, even if Rick isn’t in charge anymore, and I did really enjoy street dance last year.”

“Well, that’s two for street dance, then,” Priya teased, smirking as her blonde-haired classmate rolled her eyes.

“Yes, yes, fine,” Claudia said with a mock sigh, before giggling. “Three it is.”

“…Just three?” Priya asked expectantly as she glanced across at Susie and Phoebe, the former of whom rolled her eyes while the latter blushed.

“Not a fucking chance,” Susie replied. “No offence.”

“None taken, I think,” Priya said with a tired chuckle.

“And I- heh,” Phoebe said as her cheeks started to redden.

“Ph- Phoebe?” Lucy asked. “If- if you don’t want to, all you have to do is say-“

“Yeah, that- that’s the thing,” Phoebe interrupted as she chuckled again. “Over lockdown, I, like, started watching Joe Wicks and following his workouts- you know, to lose a bit of weight, and- heh. You posted your friend Nicole’s workouts on your Facebook, so I started following her workouts as well, and- yeah. Found myself having a LOT more fun than I expected.”

“So… fab four this year, then?” Priya asked, she, Claudia and Lucy all cheering excitedly as the American girl nodded.

“But just to try it out, to see if I like it,” Phoebe clarified.

“Sure,” Priya said with a shrug. “No pressure at all, if you don’t like it, you shouldn’t feel obliged to continue with it just because we are. But, you know, there is a saying…”

“Does it involve rearranging the words ‘friends never can too you many have’?” Claudia asked with a smug grin, triggering a mass giggle from all the girls at the table.

“Maybe,” Priya replied with an equally smug smile. “Also, you know, the street dance class IS open to girls AND boys…”

“Are you on the dance society’s committee this year, by any chance?” Luke asked, earning an eye roll and a chuckle from the Indian girl.

“Thought about it, but then I saw just how much reading we have to do for my second year,” Priya replied.

“Long story short: it’s a long story,” Claudia said with a tired laugh. “A really, REALLY long story.”

“The sort-of textbooks that could double as sledges when it snows?” Gavin asked with a chuckle that loudened as the two girls rolled their eyes. “In fairness, I think we’ve all got a lot on our plate this year, heh.”

“You study modern art, your textbooks are filled with pictures,” Susie said, before giggling as Gavin threw a sachet of ketchup at her.

“Pictures where we have to dissect every tiny detail to work out what’s going on with them,” Gavin retorted. “But to answer your implied question, Priya, ordinarily I’d love to join your dance class, but-“

“Yeah, it- it’s okay, I get it,” Priya said, exchanging a sympathetic smile with the dark-haired young man.

“I’m out too, no offence, like,” Luke said.

“None taken,” Priya said. “So… Kieran? Any reason you wouldn’t want to join the class?”

“Any reason I wouldn’t want to be surrounded by over a dozen women doing aerobic exercise for an hour?” Kieran asked. “I can kinda think of one, yep.”

“Okay, okay, point taken,” Priya chuckled. “Well, if you run into any straight guys who might be interested, let me know, heh. Which isn’t mean in a discriminatory way, but-“

“Yeah, we- we get it,” Gavin chuckled. “Though speaking of straight guys, here’s one right now you might want to try to persuade…”

“Hey guys!” The friendly, smiling face of Jerome Borden said as he made his way past the table with his lunch in hand.

“Hey, Jerome, have you got a sec?” Luke asked, smirking as Priya shot him a death glare.

“Umm, sure, what’s up?” The dark-skinned man replied.

“Priya has something she wants to ask you,” Kieran said with a smug grin as the Indian girl rolled her eyes.

“…I’m just trying to drum up some support for my street dance class, that’s all,” Priya sighed. “Well- it’s not MY class, but it’s the one I, like, go to, and- yeah. I figure it’s, like, my duty to help out where I can, if that makes sense.” The teenagers at the table all grinned as Priya started to blush, while a knowing smile spread across Jerome’s face.

“…I’m not much of a dancer, but have you ever thought about being on the Student Union committee?” Jerome asked, chuckling as the Indian girl blushed further. “Seriously, like. There were a few people on that committee last year who could’ve used that attitude, heh.”

“I- I’m pretty overwhelmed with my uni work as it is, and it’s only day one!” Priya chuckled.

“Which is also the reason you’ve left the committee, isn’t it?” Lucy teased the tall young man, who chuckled and sighed.

“Maybe,” Jerome replied. “My replacement will hopefully do a decent enough job, though.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” the distinctive voice of Rick Collins said as he gave Jerome a friendly pat on the back. “He’s not wrong though, when he says that the Union would benefit from having guys and gals like you more active on the committee, or at least the organisational side of things. I mean, you of all people should know my views on representation, right?”

“Well- I guess,” Lucy shrugged. “Maybe next year- depending on our workload, heh.”

“And depending on who’s taking over from you as chair of the LGBT society,” Kieran said with a smirk.

“Umm, I’m pretty sure I told you it was Livvy, Livvy Straw?” Rick replied. “I sent you an email about it a few weeks ago, anyway.”

“Yeah, I- I may have not checked my uni email much over summer,” Kieran mumbled, to the amusement of his friends. “Kinda needed a clean break, heh.”

“Yeah, can’t say I blame you, in fairness,” Rick sighed. “Think we all needed a break after everything this last six months. But still, back to work now- literally for me, as I still need to pick ‘our JB’s’ brain for advice about, well, how not to be a shit SU president, heh!”

“Will we still see you at LGBT society meetings?” Luke asked.

“Just try and stop me!” Rick said with a cheeky grin and a wink as he followed Jerome to another table in the vast cafeteria.

“He seems pretty cool,” Phoebe mused. “So he was the chairman of the LGBT society last year?”

“Yep,” Lucy replied. “Helped us a lot when it came to settling in, in giving us, like, a safe space where we can be us, free from discrimination, that sort of thing.”

“I still reckon it sucks that you need a safe space at all,” Claudia mumbled. “So you’re living life as the opposite gender to the one you were born as. Big deal.”

“Aye, well, sadly, to some, it IS a big deal,” Luke sighed, though his frown gradually disappeared as Phoebe gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze.

“But not to the people who matter,” Priya said firmly. “Not to the people who love you- both of you.”

“Aye,” Lucy said, trying to mimic her friend’s confidence, but deep down inside, her stomach continued to churn over the fact that in her eyes, their transition had cost them their relationship with a large part of their family.

“Anyway,” Gavin said. “What’s everyone’s plan for the afternoon? I thought I might head to the library, check out all the freshers registering, that sort of thing.”

“Count me in,” Kieran said with a shrug. “Societies don’t take sign ups until tomorrow, do they?”

“I think if you were signed up last year, it rolls over to this year anyway,” Priya said. “I don’t think they want huge crowds in the Student Union building anyway because of you know what, so- yeah. I’m only going along tomorrow to see if street dance and pointe class don’t clash like they did last year.”

“…Plus, she’s bought a matching face mask and scrunchie that she wants to show off,” Claudia teased her friend, who rolled her eyes and giggled.

“Aww, I want a matching face mask and scrunchie!” Lucy giggled. “Now that my hair’s FINALLY getting long enough, anyway.”

“I was about to say,” Priya said with a warm smile. “You seem to be getting girlier every time I see you- which I obviously mean as a compliment!”

“Thank you,” Lucy replied with a smug grin. “It still feels like the whole, well, ‘thing’ is taking forever, though.”

“But hopefully,” Luke said, “this afternoon we’ll get some long-overdue good news.”

“Which is- which is why we’re going to need to give this afternoon a miss,” Lucy said. “Hopefully we’ll have something to celebrate this evening, heh.”

“Which I think I know what it’ll be celebrating,” Priya said softly. “I’ll keep my fingers crossed for both of you.”

“Thanks,” Lucy whispered as she felt her nerves start to increase at the prospect of what the afternoon would bring.

After finishing their lunch, Luke and Lucy returned to the latter’s dorm room, where they sat down on the bed with Lucy’s phone in between them. It wasn’t long before the phone rang, and both twins had nervous smiles on their faces as they answered the call.

“Hi Dr Adams,” Lucy and Luke said simultaneously into the speakerphone.

“Good afternoon, you two,” the twins’ counsellor replied. “It was your first day back at university today, wasn’t it? How’s it been?”

“It’s been okay,” Lucy replied with a shrug.

“Yep,” Luke said. “We’ve just been, like, getting on with it.”

“Are you feeling any of the nerves that you felt at the start of last academic year?” Dr Adams asked.

“Not really,” Lucy replied. “It’s, like, everyone’s used to us now, so- yeah, if that makes sense.”

“And the workload is WAY bigger this year, so- yeah,” Luke said, before snorting with laughter. “I doubt anyone will have the time to be transphobic this year, heh.”

“Well, hopefully, anyway,” Lucy said with a tired chuckle. "If only it worked that way, like."

“As long as you’ll both be able to find time for yourselves,” Dr Adams said. “Are you planning on continuing with the extracurricular societies you joined last year?”

“Yep,” Lucy replied. “We were just talking about that at lunch, actually. I’m really looking forward to doing street dance again, actually, especially as I’ve lost almost a stone since this time last year.”

“I’m looking forward to football too,” Luke said. “I mean, I’m at about the same fitness I was this time last year and- well, umm, it- it’s not like anything else about my body has, you know, changed…”

“Okay,” Dr Adams said, before letting out a quiet chuckle of her own. “And hint taken, okay. I was going to save this for later in the call, but I can tell you’re eager to discuss it now, and this IS your session after all. As you know, after you came out to your parents in March, we began the process of preparing to start you on HRT.”

“And then, literally just a few hours later, the entire country went belly-up,” Lucy sighed as she felt her nerves start to grow.

“Indeed,” Dr Adams sighed. “Normally, we’d have had the physical and blood tests done in weeks following your coming out, but as it is, we’ve had to wait a bit- well, okay, a lot longer. However, I have received back all the information I need, and to cut a long story short, yes, I am prepared to start you both on a provisional dose of HRT, starting immediately.” The twins both grinned widely as they absorbed the news- their dreams had finally come true. However, inside, both twins were feeling very different, conflicting emotions.

While she was excited by the news that she’d received, Lucy also felt extremely nervous. Even without what she'd learned from her sessions with Dr Adams, she knew enough about oestrogen to know what effects it would have on her body- and that they would quickly prove to be irreversible. Her skin would grow smooth and soft, her waist would narrow, and her hips would widen, and slowly, but surely, she would begin to develop breasts. And while Lucy was excited about the prospect of all of these things, she was confronted by one inescapable thought- that she would still only be pretending to be a girl. Even with her ‘enhancements’ made of flesh and blood, rather than silicone and plastic, there was only so much they could change about her. She’d still be almost six feet tall, she’d still have a masculine skeleton, a masculine jaw, and worst of all, the knowledge that no matter how she presented, she’ll always have been born male. Lucy’s first year of university, living full time as a girl, has been a great adventure, and the happiest time of her life. As the reality of her transition began to sink in, though, Lucy found herself questioning if she was truly ready for the life ahead of her- and moreover, if she deserved to live that life.

Conversely, when he heard Dr Adams’s announcement, Luke had to physically restrain himself from bouncing up and down with excitement. He saw the prescription as validation that everything he felt while growing up, all of his anger and all of his resentment was justified. He categorically WAS born as the wrong gender and was going to get all the help he needed to put his life right. And he was more than willing to shove the fact- the FACT- of his diagnosis in the face of anyone who disagreed, whether they were his fellow students or his family. However, as the discussion moved on to the more practical aspects of the treatment he was to receive, Luke realised that as much as he wanted to confront people, to rub his success in their faces, he didn’t actually know anyone he could confront. His grandparents wouldn’t listen, the idiots on the football team, like Barnes, didn’t even play on the same side as him and the only people he regularly hung out with at university were the LGBT society, who seemed almost mandated to support him, and his friends like Priya and Claudia, who didn’t question his masculinity.

Unbeknownst to Luke, though, Lucy was thinking the exact same thing, and as the session started to draw to a close, the opportunity arose to address it.

“Well, we’re almost out of time for this week,” Dr Adams said. “I’ve already sent the prescriptions to a pharmacy in Durham, Luke, they’ll contact you to arrange a time for your testosterone injections by the end of this week.”

“Thanks,” Luke whispered nervously.

“Is there anything else you’d like to discuss before we end the call?” Dr Adams asked.

“Well, actually-“ Luke and Lucy said simultaneously, before giggling and blushing at their synchronicity.

“You- you go,” Luke said.

“No, really, you can go first, I don’t mind,” Lucy replied.

“Okay, Lucy- you first,” Dr Adams said, taking back control of the call.

“O- okay,” Lucy said, smiling as her brother nodded his approval. “It’s just- it’s a bit complicated, but put simply, last year at university, we- we kinda kept to ourselves, or at the very least our friendship- heh, our friendship ‘bubble’, pun not intended. But, like, it was- we only, you know, hung out with people who we knew were guaranteed to accept us for who we are, and- well…”

“I guess we- we’re nervous about being more ‘open’ with other people,” Luke continued, sharing a smile with his sister. “Believe it or not, this is the exact thing I was gonna ask.”

“I actually can believe it, given how long I’ve helped you two,” Dr Adams chuckled, causing both twins to blush. “I will admit, you are the first set of twins I’ve treated, but it’s true what they say: sometimes you do think with one mind. But to answer your question, it’s only natural to feel nervous about putting yourself out there more. This is something even cis people fret about regularly, getting out of one’s comfort zone, though obviously cis people typically don’t have to worry about the level of discrimination that you two are vulnerable to.”

“We’re only asking ‘cause-“ Lucy said, before chuckling. “Heh, a couple of our friends were thinking, like, we should- as in, we’d be good candidates to be more involved in the Student Union, or on the committee of the LGBT society, that sort of thing.”

“And would you like to take a greater role in these things?” Dr Adams.

“Umm… I dunno, really,” Lucy replied.

“Same here,” Luke said. “I mean, it’s nice to be thought of like- well, in those terms, but- yeah. It’s a lot of responsibility that I’m not sure I’m ready for yet. But at the same time, there are a lot of other people our age who are stepping up, and- heh. I dunno. Maybe I’m still nervous about, like, ‘putting myself forward’, that sort of thing.”

“That definitely goes for me too,” Lucy said. “Heh, even at the LGBT society, which is, like, a guaranteed safe space, sometimes I feel, like, out of place. Maybe that’ll change when I- when I start HRT, I dunno.”

“Well, as I’m sure you’re aware, HRT isn’t a ‘magic pill’,” Dr Adams advised. “In its most simple terms, it is a way of enabling your body to better match your true gender identity. Though there are obviously genuine psychological benefits to it as well.”

“Okay,” Lucy whispered.

“The one thing to remember,” Dr Adams said, “is that while this is a big step, it’s not one you’ll need to take alone. I’ll be with you every step of the way. From what you’ve told me, you have many genuine friends who will help you. Your parents are on your side, and above all else, you’ll always have each other.”

“Aye,” Lucy said with a smile.

“What we do, we do together, right?” Luke asked.

“Always,” Lucy whispered, though deep down inside, she wondered whether or not her brother was moving too quickly for her to keep up.

“Is there’s nothing else, do either of you want to speak with me individually before I end the call?”

“Nope,” Luke replied with a confident smile.

“Umm, nope, I’m fine,” Lucy said.

“Okay, then I’ll speak to you both next week,” Dr Adams said. “I imagine you’ll both want to celebrate with your friends- well, as much as the current rules permit, anyway!”

“Yep!” Luke said with a smile. “Thanks as always for your help.”

“Yep, thanks!” Lucy chuckled, before sighing as the call ended. “… Excited, I take it?”

“Well, duh!” Luke replied, barely containing his happiness at the news. “I mean, it sucks that I have to have an injection when you can take a tablet, but a needle in the arm once a week’s a small price to pay, right?”

“Yeah,” Lucy chuckled- though her ambivalence didn’t go unnoticed by her brother.

“Is- is everything okay?” Luke asked. “Luce?”

“Hmm?” Lucy replied. “Oh, umm, yep! Everything- everything’s great, I just- heh. It seems like everything’s, you know, going so quickly, and- heh. We’re going to have to tell mam and dad about HRT at some point too.”

“Well, there ain’t much they can do about it,” Luke snorted. “I mean, we’re nineteen, we’re adults, we don’t need their permission or anything.”

“Aye, true, I suppose,” Lucy said.

“And we don’t need their permission to go out celebrating if we want to!” Luke said with a confident smirk. “Well, as much as we’re allowed to, anyway.”

“Aye, true!” Lucy giggled. “I’ll text the girls, see if we can meet up somewhere, given that the bar’s probably already fully booked.”

“I’ll text Gav and Kieran,” Luke said. “Hey, d’you suppose Rick would be up for a party? Or is he, like, too busy with SU stuff, maybe?”

“Can’t hurt to ask him,” Lucy shrugged. “Ooh, text Jerome too, you know he’ll be pumped about news like this.”

“But not as pumped as we are, right?” Luke asked his sister, who responded with an excited squeak- even as deep down inside, she was still nervous about the prospect of making changes to her body that could prove to be irreversible...

Later that night, the twins, their six close friends along with Rick, Jerome and a handful of their other friends from the university’s LGBT society congregated over Zoom to celebrate the twins' news with music, dancing and a lot of alcoholic beverages. However, with everyone having classes the following day, the party lasted for less than two hours, with Luke and Lucy (who had 'attended' the party in the former's room) being the last to leave the call.

“That was a GREAT night,” Luke said with a tired yet happy grin as he walked his sister back to her room. “Been a pretty good day too, heh!”

“Yep!” Lucy giggled. “Ah… I’m- I’m kinda nervous, you know? I mean, about my body changing. I mean, I know what to expect, but- yeah. I still reckon it’ll be a surprise when it, like, actually happens. I mean, like, the changes, heh.”

“How much have you had to drink?” Luke asked, smirking as his sister rolled her eyes and giggled again. “But yeah, I guess I get what you mean. But, like, it’s not like we haven’t changed at all physically yet, if you get what I mean?” The young trans man smiled as he lifted the cuffs of his jeans to show the fine, wispy hairs covering his shins. “I mean, like, it’s not much, but it’s not nothing either, right?”

“True,” Lucy said. “I- I’d better get back to my room, we’ve got a long day tomorrow, heh!”

“Aye,” Luke said, before leaning in for a long hug with his sister. “But- like, we did it, heh! Taken the next step, like.”

“Yep!” Lucy said, her giggle not disguising her nerves, which were only exacerbated by her inebriated state.

As she laid in bed that night, Lucy mused on what her brother had said about the changes they had already undergone. Lucy regularly shaved the hairs on her legs and her arms, the hair on her head had grown out and her dance class, along with other exercise, had helped to narrow her waist and tone her muscles. And yet, all of those changes could be easily reversed. It would take literally zero effort to not shave her arms or legs- or even her face- cutting her hair would be trivial once covid restrictions were eased, and all it would take for her waist to widen again was a few months of her regular 'student diet' and no exercise. The changes brought about by HRT, though, would be much harder to reverse. However, Lucy knew that just like the other changes she had experiences, those changes would be for the better. She'd dreamed of being a girl her whole life, for so long that she was forced to admit that she didn't know how to react to that dream becoming a reality...

“Mmph,” Luke moaned, his head throbbing as his alarm woke him from his slumber the following morning. The smile quickly returned to his face, though, when he remembered the events of the previous day. Despite his hangover, Luke had a spring in his step as he washed his face and combed his hair. Even wrapping his elasticated bandage around his chest felt like less of a chore than usual- while it still reminded him of where he’d come from, he also saw it as a goal-a promise, even, that one day he would no longer need to use it, and he was closer to that goal than ever before. After pulling on a comfortable pair of jeans and his trusty Newcastle United replica shirt, Luke all but jogged the short distance down the corridor to his sister’s room before eagerly knocking on her door.

“What!?” Lucy protested as the banging woke her up. “How- what- what time is it, anyway?”

“8:30, breakfast time,” Luke replied as his sister opened the door with her bedcovers huddled around her. “Are you going to wear just your sheet to the cafeteria?”

“Oh- give me a break, I had a lot to drink last night,” Lucy moaned. “…And so did you, how- how are you so perky this early in the morning? We don’t even have any classes this morning!”

“Aye, but I want to get breakfast early, then me, Susie and Phoebe are heading to the library to get some early reading in,” Luke replied. “Obviously, you can come too- if you, like, get dressed first.”

“…Gimme a sec,” Lucy said, closing her door and letting out a long sigh. After throwing her sheet back onto her bed, Lucy turned to face her full-length mirror, sighing at the image that greeted her.

Staring at her from the mirror was- biologically speaking, anyway- the face and body of a young man. A slender young man with long hair, but a young man nonetheless. Even ignoring his wide jaw and prominent Adam’s apple, his shoulders were broad, his hips were narrow and his chest was flat. However, Lucy knew that at the very least, the latter two of those characteristics didn’t have to stay the same forever. As she'd mentally reminded herself the previous night, over time, oestrogen would make her skin softer and smoother, it would narrow her waist and widen her hips, and slowly, but surely, breasts- actual flesh and blood breasts- would grow on her chest. Oestrogen wouldn’t do anything about her skeleton, and certainly wouldn’t do anything about her genitalia, but even the latter could be taken care of further down the line.

As she once again reminded herself, Lucy had fantasised about looking into a mirror and seeing a girl staring back at her. The longer she stayed at university, the more and more that dream seemed to come true. While her clothes and make-up couldn’t disguise her jaw or her skeleton, it did convincingly project the image of her as the woman she wanted to be. An image that many of her fellow students accepted without question, but which Lucy herself knew, deep down, was just a mask- or worse yet, just a fantasy. However, regardless of whether or not it was a 'mask', Lucy felt that she had more than earned the right to wear it if she so chose. And she wasn’t going to let anyone tell her otherwise- not even herself.

After quickly splashing her face with water and removing what little facial hair had grown since she last shaved- and musing that permanent removal of facial hair was another change she could make- Lucy applied her make-up before pulling on a comfortable pair of black leggings, her favourite pair of trainers and her university hoodie. As she glanced in her mirror one last time, she smiled at the image that greeted her- that of any ordinary female student- just as she'd dreamed her whole life.

“Took your time,” Luke said with a tired chuckle as Lucy emerged from her room. “You feeling okay?”

“Yeah, I- I’m fine, just maybe overdid it last night, heh,” Lucy chuckled.

“Aye, well, we had a lot to celebrate, didn’t we?” Luke asked with a grin.

“Totally,” Lucy replied, mirroring her brother’s smile as they headed toward the cafeteria.

“Morning, you two!” Susie said with a grin as the twins got their breakfast and sat down at the table where she and Phoebe were already eating. “You’re not suffering too much this morning, then?”

“Well… I’M not,” Luke replied with a grin as his twin rolled her eyes.

“I thought I saw you ‘indulging’ a bit last night,” Susie teased the tall trans girl. “You sure you’re okay to hit the books this morning?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” Lucy replied with a shrug. “Maybe just a bit, you know, like, I’ve had a lot happen all at once, it- I’ll- I’ll be fine, honestly.”

“If you’re sure,” Susie said, smiling gently as her friend nodded.

“Positive,” Lucy said. “Besides, last night was just a warmup for welcoming all the new freshers to the LGBT society tonight, wasn’t it?”

“Well- I think yesterday was a good enough reason to celebrate by itself, if that makes sense,” Susie said with a grin.

“I definitely think so,” Luke chuckled.

“…I guess no arguments here either!” Lucy giggled. “Hopefully the rest of freshers’ week will be a little less, you know, ‘headachey’, heh.”

“Well- for us, if not the freshers themselves!” Susie said, earning a laugh from everyone at the table. Alcohol-induced headaches, at least, Lucy thought to herself as the teenagers quickly finished her breakfast and headed toward the university’s vast library.

After a morning spent reading up on the latest scientific journals- when Lucy and Luke weren't reading up on and answering questions from their friends about HRT- the four young students headed to the cafeteria for lunch, where they met up with their other friends- all of whom were still buzzing after the previous night.

“Hey guys!” Priya squeaked excitedly as she sat down along with Claudia, Kieran and Gavin. “Recovered after last night yet?”

“You’re, like, the hundredth person to ask us that today!” Lucy snorted in reply.

“Maybe a bit of an exaggeration, but not far off,” Luke chuckled as he casually munched his food. “But to answer your question: yes, mostly anyway, heh!”

“Do you know- do you know yet when you’ll like, have your first ‘treatment’?” Kieran asked. “If that’s not too sensitive a question, like.”

“Well, our counsellor sent the prescriptions electronically,” Luke replied. “So it should be at the pharmacy on Friday. Assuming they’re not backlogged due to you-know-what, anyway.”

“Though we’ll understand if you don’t want another party for the first actual pill,” Lucy chuckled. “I don’t even know if the pills mix with alcohol, heh!”

“I’m pretty sure Laura’s said in the past that there’s no, like, bad reaction,” Priya said. “I don’t know how much she knows about testosterone but I’m sure she knows someone who will, and I’m certain I can, like, arrange an introduction.”

“Thanks,” Luke said with a warm smile. “I’m really, REALLY pissed off that we couldn’t go down to London at summer, it’d have been amazing to actually get to meet all your friends, you know?”

“Covid won’t last forever,” Priya said with a confident smile. “I mean, we won’t be at uni forever either, but- but we’ll stay friends, right?”

“Too right,” Susie said, earning murmurs of agreement from all of her friends. “So, what’s everyone been up to this morning?”

“Getting everything ready for when the fun starts tomorrow,” Gavin replied. “And that’s ‘fun’ in inverted commas, as opposed to the ‘fun’ without them that we’re going to be having tonight, heh!”

“Have you ALREADY got a party lined up for tonight?” Priya asked incredulously.

“Well- not as such,” Gavin replied. “But there’ll definitely be something put on by the LGBT society. But don’t worry, I’m sure I can blag a few ‘ally’ invitations, heh!”

“As long as you’re sure we wouldn’t be intruding?” Phoebe asked, smiling as Gavin- along with Susie, Kieran and the twins- all smiled and shook their heads.

“You can never have too many friends,” Lucy reminded her classmate.

“If you don’t mind me asking, though,” Claudia said in a timid voice, “I- I’ve always wondered why, you know, ‘T’ is included in with ‘L’, ‘G’ and ‘B’? I mean, you’ve probably already explained this to me, but- yeah. Gender identity doesn’t have anything to do with sexual orientation, does it?”

“Generally speaking, nope,” Luke said with a shrug. “I mean, I consider myself to be bisexual, so- yeah. Just as long as anyone who, like, gets with me understands that they’re getting with a man, regardless of- well, 'stuff'.”

“Fair enough,” Claudia said. “Sorry if that was, you know, a sensitive question…”

“Nah, it’s fine,” Luke replied with a grin. “There’s a big difference between asking ‘cause you’re curious and asking ‘cause you, I dunno, get off on the thought of ‘unconventional’ sex or whatever.”

“Yeah,” Claudia chuckled nervously.

“Though I reckon it’s all down to, like, attitudes,” Lucy mused, biting her lip as her friends looked at her with confusion. “Like, why LGBT issues are often treated the same way regardless of, well, ‘letter’. Most transphobes are inevitably going to be homophobes as well, and I’d be willing to bet that a good chunk of them are misogynists as well. I mean- and I’m just saying this as a fact, I don’t mean anything bad by it, but- but Luke’s had a less shit about his transition than I have.”

“…Can’t argue with that,” Luke mumbled as he struggled to return his sister's gaze.

“I don’t get how that would make someone misogynistic, though?” Phoebe asked. “Surely a misogynist would be angrier at- umm, well- a woman becoming a man?”

“It’s misogynistic,” Lucy explained, “because a ‘woman becoming a man’ is seen as, like, a step up, but a ‘man becoming a woman’ is seen as somehow demeaning.”

“A lot like a man being in love with a man,” Kieran said quietly. “When I got my first boyfriend, pretty much all of my friends would ask me ‘so which one of you is ‘the girl’’, like being a girl is somehow a bad thing?”

“These people probably wouldn’t get on well with my friend Harriet,” Priya chuckled. “She’s radical- and I mean RADICALLY feminist. One of her favourite sayings is ‘a skirt is a symbol of strength’. And trust me, neither she or her girlfriend are, well, ‘the boy’ in the relationship, for want of a better way of putting it.”

“But she- she’s trans-inclusive, right?” Luke asked.

“Totally,” Priya replied. “She can’t stand TERFs. Though I do sometimes wonder if, like, she’d feel that way if she didn’t know Laura or Ashley. Though both of them are SO girly, that- yeah. No mistaking either of THEM for boys, believe me!”

“Yeah,” Lucy chuckled nervously as she fidgeted in her seat. “So she’d, like, not have any problem with, you know, trans girls in women-only places?”

“Nope,” Priya replied with a shrug. “Nor would I. The whole ‘trans people only pretend to be women to gain access to women’s spaces to assault them’ is total bullshit. Just meet- well, any trans woman and you’ll understand why. And I’ve had the pleasure of making friends with three, hehe!”

“Yeah,” Lucy said, smiling even as inside, she continued to feel uncomfortable. While she’d enjoyed her brief chats with Laura and Ashley over the summer break, she had always felt somewhat inadequate compared to them. She’d rationalised that as them having transitioned for longer than her, but she often found herself getting ‘lost’ in their conversations. Lucy hoped that starting HRT would ease these feelings and make her feel more like the girl she’d always wanted to be, but as the day of her first tablet drew near, Lucy found herself feeling more anxious than ever. What if she still didn't fit in with Priya's friends? What if her body didn't develop the way she wanted? What if it didn't develop at all?

After lunch, however, Lucy’s worries began to ease- or at least, get shifted to the side- as she and her friends headed toward the place where she knew she would feel safest- even if, as she remembered, it was the place where she had her first experience of explicit transphobia almost exactly twelve months earlier. However, Lucy quickly put those thoughts to the back of her mind as together, she, Luke, Susie, Gavin and Kieran approached the stand, giggling as the young woman at the stand playfully sighed and rolled her eyes.

“And is that any way to greet your ‘fab five’ from last year, Livvy?” Gavin teasingly asked the new chairperson of the university’s LGBT society.

“Yes, yes, it’s great to see you all as well,” The blonde-haired Middlesbrough native replied with a chuckle. “Even if you are wearing THAT.” Luke grinned smugly as Livvy gestured toward his trusty Newcastle United shirt.

“Keep crying down in the Championship,” Luke chuckled. “But aye, we’re all here to sign up again, heh.”

“Which I’d have hoped you’d remember can be done over email, and today is really more just for freshers,” Livvy reminded the group. “Again- not that I’m not glad to see you all today.”

“We just thought we’d come and, you know, offer some moral support,” Luke said with a shrug.

“I notice that none of you offered to ‘morally support’ the committee this year,” Livvy said, before shaking her head and giggling. “But I do appreciate it.”

“Gotta represent where we can, right?” Kieran chuckled. “Seriously, though, anything we can do, just ask. Right, guys and gals?”

“Too right,” Susie replied with a grin as everyone nodded.

“Well- I definitely do appreciate it,” Livvy said with a warm grin.

“It’s the least we can do,” Kieran said. “After all, you do throw the best parties, especially welcoming ones for freshers that second year students can usually go to as well…” The five teenagers all chuckled as Livvy took a deep breath, before sighing and letting out a tired chuckle.

“Annnnnd THERE it is,” Livvy teased. “Seriously, though, as much as we’d love to have a welcoming party, you-know-what means we have to be a bit more ‘scaled back’ than last year, heh. Bubbles only, maybe only a Zoom meet-up I’m afraid. At least until we’re all settled in and can ‘bubble’ together. Or until we all get vaccinated. Or covid goes away of its own accord, heh.”

“Ah- fair enough,” Kieran said. “And in fairness, we did do a bit of celebrating last night…” Luke and Lucy both rolled their eyes, the latter blushing as their Mancunian friend gestured toward them.

“But you all kept safe, I hope?” Livvy asked.

“And we all took lateral flow tests before coming back, we’re all ‘clear’,” Lucy replied. “And we’re all wearing these, too.” Livvy smiled as Lucy, along with her friends, gestured to the light blue masks covering their mouths and noses.

“Though we’d much rather be wearing THOSE!” Gavin said with a giggle as he gestured to the cloth masks on Livvy’s stall, all of which bore the colours of a pride flag, whether that was the classic rainbow flag, the blue, pink and white of the trans pride flag or any of the many other flags that were proudly displayed at the stall.

“Well…” Livvy said with a twinkle in her eye. “I would offer to sell one to you, but we’re not allow to handle coins, so I guess I’m going to have to give them to you for free!” The five students all giggled excitedly as they took the masks from the table, Gavin and Kieran taking the same rainbow-coloured masks that Livvy was wearing, while Susie took a pink, yellow and cyan mask and Luke and Lucy helped themselves to masks with the blue, pink and white pattern that had become very important to them over the previous few months.

The five teenagers wasted no time in swapping their plain masks for their new ones, posing for a socially distanced group selfie once they’d all changed. As the group bade farewell to Livvy and moved away from the stall, though, Luke and especially Lucy began to feel even more self-conscious than usual. While they certainly felt no shame in being transgender, especially following their good news the previous day, they usually made no effort to advertise that fact- but that had changed once they'd donned the masks. However, while they felt uneasy at singling themselves out for potential ridicule, they quickly realised possibly the greatest advantage of wearing their mask, when they rounded the corner and nearly ran into a young man wearing exact same facial covering as them.

“Oh- umm, h- hi,” the young man said nervously in a soft Cheshire accent.

“H- hi,” Luke replied with a nervous wave, before elbowing his sister in the ribs.

“Hi,” Lucy said in a voice barely louder than a whisper. “I- umm, I like your mask, heh.”

“Well- yeah, I can kinda tell,” the young man said, smiling sympathetically as the tall trans girl blushed. “I- I’m Anthony, by the way. Anthony Mayhew.”

“I- I’m Luke,” the Geordie trans man said as he exchanged an elbow bump with the newcomer. “This is my sister Lucy, we- we’re twins.”

“Ah- cool,” Anthony said with a nervous chuckle. “Well, umm, I- I look forward to, like, getting to know you better. At the LGBT society, I mean, I- I assume you’re all members from, like, your masks?”

“Ah- yeah, we are,” Lucy chuckled.

“Cool,” Anthony said as he fidgeted nervously. “I- I’m feeling kinda outnumbered here, heh.”

“Well, you definitely shouldn’t be,” Susie said with a warm smile. “’Cause I don’t see this as five against one, it’s definitely six against zero. And, hey, we’re meant to be living to a rule of six, aren’t we?”

“Well- I suppose,” Anthony chuckled.

“And you can never have too many friends, right?” Kieran asked.

“Well- I guess not,” Anthony chuckled, prompting a confused look from his new friends.

“You- you’re not familiar with that saying, then?” Lucy asked.

“…I guess I’ve probably heard it somewhere,” Anthony replied with a nervous chuckle.

“Not- not an Angels fan, then?” Kieran asked.

“Ah- no,” Anthony said with a tired chuckle. “Not really my ‘thing’, heh.” The five students all smiled supportively as Anthony unzipped his hoodie to reveal a t-shirt bearing the image of the TV character known as 'The Mandalorian' and the phrase ‘This is the Way’ written underneath. What Luke and Lucy couldn’t help but notice, though, was the distinctive ‘shape’ of the young man’s chest underneath the t-shirt- and the fact that he started to blush as he hastily zipped his baggy hoodie back up.

“Yeah, sorry…” Lucy mumbled. “Probably a cliche to assume that all trans people like the Angels, heh. It’s especially bad for us to think that!”

“Meh, no offence taken,” Anthony said, before fidgeting as an awkward silence fell over the group. “Umm, anyway, it- it was nice meeting you…”

“Likewise,” Luke said. “We’ll talk soon at, like, LGBT society meetings, right?”

“Yeah,” Anthony chuckled. “That- that’d be nice. I’ll- I’ll, umm, I’ll head off now…” The group of five students waved Anthony off with smiles on their faces, though once he was out of earshot, Luke let out a long, tired sigh.

“…And now we know why we’re not on the LGBT society’s committee, heh,” the young trans man sighed. “We’d do a good job on the ‘scaring freshers off’ society, though.”

“Oh, I dunno,” Lucy mused quietly. “We did do one good thing, at least- we let him know he wasn’t alone. I can’t speak for him, obviously, but the poor guy must’ve been terrified the first few days he was here, not knowing anyone, not even being able to get to know anyone due to covid, so- yeah. Think that’s our good deed for the day done, heh.”

“Well- can’t argue with that,” Luke said. “God knows how terrified I’d have been if I came here but I didn’t have you with me.”

“D’aww,” Gavin teased the twins, who both rolled their eyes. “I would say ‘get a room’, but I don’t want to be seen as encouraging incest, heh!”

“Oh- shut it, you!” Luke snorted as his friend laughed even louder.

“Well, anyway,” Susie said. “Like you said, we’ve done our good deed for the day, and like Livvy said, we don’t actually need to be here in person to sign up for societies, so… anyone fancy something to eat?”

“Sounds good to me,” Kieran said.

“I- I’ll catch you up in a bit,” Luke said. “Just want to check in with James from the football society first, let him know about, like, the testosterone treatments. Don’t want to be, like, accused of breaking any rules- God knows there were enough people who thought I did last year, heh.”

“They drug test you on a university team?” Gavin asked.

“Well- I haven’t been tested yet,” Luke replied. “But I don’t want to, you know, be accused of hiding anything. God knows I got enough of THAT last year as well.”

“Well- we’ll be in the cafeteria when you’re ready,” Susie said as she and her friends bade farewell to Luke with a fist bump.

As he wondered among the stalls- while taking care to keep the mandatory two metre distance from his fellow students- Luke mused on his and Lucy’s conversation, specifically how anxious they had both been the previous year. Luke was forced to concede that without Lucy, or even Susie with him in his first week, he’d likely not have had the courage to leave his room, even if he had mustered up the courage to join the LGBT society. And he certainly wouldn’t have the courage to sign himself up for the society whose stall he made a beeline toward, though Luke’s confidence faded somewhat when he saw that the person he wanted to speak to was accompanied by the last person he wanted to even see, much less talk to that day.

“Ah, not even hiding it anymore, then?” The smug Yorkshire accent of James Barnes said as he pointed at Luke’s facemask. “I thought the whole point of pretending to be a guy was that you’re supposed to hide it?”

“Barnes- don’t,” James Thorn cautioned as he adjusted his own facemask, which proudly bore the logo of Lincoln City FC. “What can I do for you, Luke?”

“Umm, can we- can we talk privately, please?” Luke asked, trying not to blush as Barnes laughed.

“Looks like you’re not going to be single long, Thorny!” The Yorkshireman teased.

“…Yes, we can talk privately,” Thorny replied. “Barnes- piss off for five minutes, okay?”

“Sure,” Barnes said, holding his hands up in mock surrender. “Just leave a sock or something on the doorknob if you need more time!” Luke and Thorny both rolled their eyes as Barnes walked away, before sighing.

“Ugh, wanker,” Thorny muttered under his breath before shaking his head. “Anyway, what’s up, Luke? If you’re here for a Newcastle United facemask, I’ll have to have that ordered I’m afraid- though I do like the one you’re wearing!”

“Thanks,” Luke said with a shy chuckle. “I just- I just wanted to let you know that- well, two things, really. First, I’m planning on staying on the team this year.”

“Glad to hear it,” Thorny said with a smile. “Why do I sense that the second thing’s going to begin with ‘but’?”

“Actually, it isn’t,” Luke said. “I- heh. Me and my sister, that is, we- we’ve been prescribed hormone replacement therapy by our gender identity counsellor. For me, that’s gonna mean testosterone injections, once every week.”

“Ah- well, congratulations… right?” Thorny replied. “That IS a big deal for you, right?”

“Oh- you have no idea, really,” Luke chuckled. “But I was just wondering if, you know, it’d be, like, over the limit or anything-“

“I- I’m not a doctor or a pharmacist or anything,” Thorny chuckled. “Hell, I’m studying computer science, so I’m about as far away as it gets, heh. But the FIFA rulebook at least says that as long as testosterone levels are within, like, normal levels for the gender you identify as, then there’s no issue. So as far as I’m concerned, you should be fine.”

“Well- great!” Luke chuckled. “Though I’m guessing we’re not going to be playing any actual games any time soon, right?”

“Because of the same reason the Euros got postponed?” Thorny asked sadly. “And the same reason we’re wearing masks, heh. Yeah, it is kinda difficult to play football socially distanced, heh. We can still train, though. Work out a bit, maybe. Either way, we’ll work something out, and I’ll keep you posted.”

“Thanks,” Luke said, giving his friend a thumbs up as he walked away. Before he could get far, though, he paused as he heard his earlier tormentor return to the stall.

“What did the ladyboy want?” Barnes asked, instantly triggering Luke’s anger.

“Not cool using that word, mate,” Thorny replied.

“Huh- I guess you’re right,” Barnes said, offering Luke a glimmer of hope that was soon dashed. “Ladyboy is when it’s a guy pretending to be a girl, right? So what would she be, ‘gentlemangirl’ or something?”

“Yeah, well, don’t ever say that to Luke’s face, at least,” Thorny snorted.

“What?” Barnes protested. “If she wants to be a man, she should be able to deal with a little banter.”

“There’s a difference between ‘banter’ and being a prick,” Thorny cautioned.

“There’s also a big difference between having a prick and not having one,” Barnes said.

“So- so what you’re saying is, if Luke was post-op, you wouldn’t give him such a hard time?” Thorny asked.

“If he was post-op, he’d probably find it more funny,” Barnes shrugged.

“You do realise that makes literally no sense, right?” Thorny asked.

“…Fine, forget I brought it up,” Barnes sighed in a tired voice as Luke barely suppressed a growl and walked away, quickly reuniting with his friends.

“All good, then?” Susie asked.

“Yeah,” Luke semi-lied in reply. “We gonna get something to eat, then?” Luke smiled as he accompanied his friends, but deep inside, he felt uneasy- and for the first time, he found himself doubting whether HRT would solve any of his problems. Barnes's casual bigotry had made it clear to him that no matter how much testosterone flowed through his veins, how flat his chest was or even what he had between his legs, there would still be those who saw him as only pretending to be a man. However, despite his anxiety, Luke was determined not to burden any of his friends with it- not even his sister, despite the fact that unbeknownst to him, she was feeling the exact same way that he was.

Later that night, Luke and Lucy convened in the latter’s room for the LGBT society's first Zoom meeting of the year. Just before the scheduled start time of the meeting, though, Lucy was interrupted by a knock on her door- and was confused by the sight that greeted her when she opened it.

“Hi Luce!” Susie said with a confident grin as she let herself into the dorm.

“H- hi, Susie,” Lucy said confusedly. “Umm, what- what are you wearing?”

“You like?” Susie replied as she turned to show off the short denim skirt hanging from her hips. “I thought about what Priya was saying earlier, about how skirts are symbols of strength, so I thought, you know, why not be girly and strong?”

“Even though you are wearing trousers underneath?” Luke asked, smirking as the ginger-haired girl gave him a playful shove.

“They’re leggings, actually,” Susie retorted. “Bag- baggy leggings- okay, they’re trousers. But why shouldn’t I wear what makes me comfortable and strong at the same time?”

“No reason I can think of,” Luke chuckled, his smile widening as Susie sat down next to him and playfully rested her head on his shoulder, while Lucy sat down on the other side of him, trying not to fidget at her friend's arrival. Even despite the trousers Susie wore underneath her skirt, Lucy had never known her friend to be so overtly feminine, making her feel comparatively underdressed even in her own casual skirt and hoodie.

However, as the Zoom call started, Lucy found herself focussing on the positives in her life- and much to her delight, she was quickly reminded of how many there were. She focussed on the many friends she had, both old, such as the familiar faces that had greeted her upon her return to university and the faces on the laptop screen that warmly welcomed her back to the LGBT society, and the new friends she’d made, such as Phoebe and Anthony, both of whom she looked forward to getting to know better during her second year. However, Lucy couldn’t escape the fact that there were many negatives in her life as well. The ever-present threat of covid had meant that for the most part, she could only see her friends at a two-metre distance, or worse yet, over a computer screen. The street dance lessons she’d enjoyed were on indefinite hold, and worst of all, the hormone treatments she’d been looking forward to were causing her more anxiety with each passing day. Lucy just hoped that she would be able to follow Priya’s advice and view her skirt as a symbol of strength, as Lucy found herself feeling more vulnerable than she had done in a long time…

Meanwhile, with each passing second, Luke found himself mentally counting down the days until he would receive the first testosterone injection that he so badly craved. However, he too couldn’t escape the negatives that blighted his life- both those caused by covid, and those caused by the ignorance of people like Barnes. However, Luke was determined to rise above such setbacks with the help of the physical changes that would happen to his body, but more importantly the help he knew he'd get from his friends, and most importantly of all, his sister. Secretly, Luke was ecstatic that he and his sister would be starting HRT at the same time, as it meant that they would be able to fulfil the most important promise they made to each other- that whatever they did, they would do together, always.

However, both twins secretly feared that that might not be the case for much longer...

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Comments

The twins are back!

In more than one sense of the word. :-) I dunno what it is about this story, whether it's because I'm crafting a new story from scratch, devoting a comparatively large amount of time to it (compared to earlier tales) or becuse it's so separated from my other stories that I find I'm struggling with it a bit (my fibormyalgia always being at its worst at this time of year doesn't help much either). It's plotted to the end, though, so I'm going to keep persisting.

...And as you can see from the upcoming chapters page, it won't be my newest story for long. :-) I'm hoping to drop the first chapter of 'Lisa' on the 28th, so keep your eyes peeled for it- hopefully you'll show my newest protagonist the same love you've shown Luke, Lucy and all of my other guys and gals. :-)

Debs xxxx

Comment for Twins - Part 11

“What did the ladyboy want?” Barnes asked, instantly triggering Luke’s anger.

“Not cool using that word, mate,” Thorny replied.

“Huh- I guess you’re right,” Barnes said, offering Luke a glimmer of hope that was soon dashed. “Ladyboy is when it’s a guy pretending to be a girl, right? So what would she be, ‘gentlemangirl’ or something?”

“Yeah, well, don’t ever say that to Luke’s face, at least,” Thorny snorted.

“What?” Barnes protested. “If she wants to be a man, she should be able to deal with a little banter.”

“There’s a difference between ‘banter’ and being a prick,” Thorny cautioned.

“There’s also a big difference between having a prick and not having one,” Barnes said.

“So- so what you’re saying is, if Luke was post-op, you wouldn’t give him such a hard time?” Thorny asked.

“If he was post-op, he’d probably find it more funny,” Barnes shrugged.

“You do realise that makes literally no sense, right?” Thorny asked.

“…Fine, forget I brought it up,” Barnes sighed in a tired voice as Luke barely suppressed a growl and walked away, quickly reuniting with his friends. Why do I find it so much fun to use Barnes for actual target practice with a pistol? I wouldn't be wasting any ammunition as he is a legitimate target for termination :) F'k Barnes!

I am still quite anxious for both Luke and Lucy as they start to change and adapt to their university environment. Discrimination will be high as will be their nerves trying to adapt to it. Looking forward to the next chapter.

Sephrena