Thank you for your patience while this story continues. I am writing this as it's posted, so if you have any suggestions on where you'd like to see this story go, please let me know. I've already gotten some great constructive criticism and ideas from all of you wonderful readers.

Teri sat in the living room, her iPad on her lap, staring through the window at the trees. Lucinda had presented her with a yogurt and fruit parfait, and she sipped herbal tea.
 
Zoe walked by and smiled. “Eating smart, that’s good to see. Oh, yeah. Lisa told me to spread the word. There's no rehearsal today. Phil is making sure our equipment is over at the club this afternoon. So all we have to do is eat dinner together, have an hour sound check, and play from nine to twelve.”
 
Teri smiled. “Sounds pretty loose to me. Ah yes, the Rendezvous. So many memories. That’s where I got my start!”
 
Zoe nodded. “Wise ass. But you know the General. She’ll have us open all the songs in the first set. She’ll help us decide who’s doing solos. I’m guessing that should take twenty minutes. Then she has us do some of the songs from the album and tighten up the live versions. I’m sure she’s already written everything down.”
 
“Yeah, she is a perfectionist. Based on your predicted schedule, that should bring us to ten minutes before the hour. She’ll smile, pronounce us ready, and we’ll all run to the bathroom, and I'll grab a candy bar.” Teri grinned.
 
Zoe laughed. “You’ve got me addicted to those dark chocolate Ghirardelli bars. I’m going to be fat before I start showing. Bad.”
 
Teri hugged her. “When are you going to start?”
 
“Hmmm. Already did.”
 
“That’s why you’re not drinking or smoking. Oh, wow. A baby. Just the thought of you and Bruno having a baby makes me all warm inside.” Then Teri remembered why they were there. “Right. Got some lyrics. These are random lines. I gleaned them from when Tiffany gave us a lesson on bad boys.”
 
Zoe nodded and smiled. “Remember, she called you a bad boy.”
 
Teri laughed, remembering his shock when beautiful Tiffany looked at him and called him a bad boy. “So, am I a bad girl now?”
 
Zoe laughed and looked over the lines. “Oh, honey. You were always a bad girl. Now, you’re dangerous.”
 
“What comes after dangerous?”
 
“Lethal!”
 
She laughed and showed Zoe the lyrics.
 
The way you stare right through me makes me want you. You turn and look away like I don’t count. As much as I hate this, I want more.
 
You’re bad for me, bringing me heartache and sadness. I hunger for your touch, to feel your arms squeezing and holding me close. Your kisses warming my body and soul
 
But you don’t see me. I don’t exist.
 
Zoe looked over the list and then looked at Teri. “Jeez, girl. You got some blues rumbling there. These are gold. I mean, you are the Queen of Angst. Even I got a sob reading through them.”
 
“Well, I guess that’s good. I mean, we’re on the right track. So here’s my thought. Bach concerto for piano and cello, then a new slow dirge and these lyrics. We’ll need a song. Lisa sings them twice. By then, you and Gina start to bang out a thump.” Teri clapped her hands together, showing the 4/4 beat.
 
Zoe nodded “… And?”
 
Teri shyly grinned. “Uh, that’s all I’ve got. I’m sure we can cobble up lyrics that Lisa can incoherently scream while we rock. Just as long as it doesn’t sound like Paint It Black and don’t infringe on copyright laws.”
 
Zoe laughed. “So is this a new intro to Love ‘Em or Leave ‘Em?
 
Teri nodded, feeling her ponytail bob. “Yeah, that would be the rock part. But did we ever write anything or just talk about it?”
 
Zoe shrugged. Then she looked her over and smiled. “You’ve got this energy about you. What’s up?”
 
Teri took a deep breath. “Uh. My brain kinda got zapped during the show yesterday. You know, the adrenaline and all. I’d almost forgotten the rush, and then BAM! It threw a switch and struck like a laboratory scientist catching a stray explosion or radioactive wave. Blew my mind. And after the show, I found enough balls to try spelling my name T-E-R-I and declare myself out.”
 
Zoe stood up and hugged her. “Okay, girl. Welcome aboard our team. I’m excited that you’re ready to swim with the rest of us in the estrogen pools. But are you okay with that?”
 
Teri shrugged. “I don’t know. It just seems like the next step. I’m ready to see what happens. But I am quite frightened. Who knows, maybe I’m going to get happy."
 
“Happy? You’re not happy?”
 
Teri looked Zoe in the face. “Well, you know me. I wake up in a depressed state. Grace says we will work on that, and I can take a pill for depression. But right now, no more medications until my body gets done with puberty. I stopped thinking about what happened inside my head when we made the album. And then, this huge adrenaline rush pushed me over the edge and gave me the grit. I thought it was time.”
 
“Sounds like a call to Grace is in order.”
 
“Yeah, we’re going to Zoom our session today around lunchtime.”
 
 
Grace hated Zoom, but sometimes it worked. She was pleased to see Terry looking back at her. “Hey!”
 
Grace smiled and fell into her professional mode. “What’s today’s number?”
 
Teri smiled. “Well, it could be an eleven.”
 
Grace chuckled. “Okay! Fill me in.”
 
Teri nodded. “Well, it all started when we played live on Allentown Music’s rooftop yesterday. I’d forgotten what it was like to play for a crowd. You know, hear the yelling, clapping, and playing loud. All those eyes on you, watching like we were all plugged in together. I was feeling the energy running through my guitar and body. It flipped a brain switch and made me realize I was letting Terry go. I will try spelling my name with one R and an I.”
 
Grace nodded back. “Well, that certainly is something. Have you shared this with anyone?”
 
“Well, Jenn and I had a long evening of talking. It all seemed good. She is very encouraging for me to find my center. And then I talked to Zoe this morning while we were working on some lyrics.”
 
“How are you feeling?”
 
“Well, out of breath. I jumped on this ferry as it was leaving the dock. And I’m looking back at the land as we sail away.”
 
“Does that make you sad?”
 
“No, more like apprehensive. I think I’m scared. So the million dollar question is, what’s it like to be female?”
 
Grace chuckled. “No pain, no gain says my girlfriend, Gina. She’s big on exercising your demons away.”
 
“Yeah, I did my running with the band this morning.”
 
“Did that help?”
 
“It always settles my nerves and helps me focus on my day. It didn’t hurt.”
 
“Did you announce anything to them about your decision?”
 
“No. I thought it might make me look foolish. I don’t want to cry wolf. Is this the right time? Or if there even needs to be a time. I guess Lisa can introduce me as her younger sister tonight.”
 
“Are you going to ride the ferry to its destination, or do you want to ride back to the pier?”
 
Teri took a deep breath. “Well, I want to curl under those covers until it all passes. I mean, I feel good. But it’s like trying on clothes and not being sure if it fits right. I keep looking and wondering, and Jenn comes along and straightens me out. I’ve always asked the Wildcats for help with the stuff they send from Jersey Girl. I’m not there yet.”
 
“How so?”
 
“Well, my designers always leave a lot of flesh showing with my costumes. Holes, rips, cuts, everything is tight and short. They like to leave me half naked.”
 
“And…”
 
“Well, I had to get used to it. Tasha has a certain image, and that was my job.”
 
“Well, it's not as simple as removing and putting on new clothes. You’re jumping into the Teri/Tasha side full-time. Are you ready? It seems like you’ve been screwing yourself into the ground worrying over this.”
 
“Yeah, I should stop worrying about it. Make it less of an issue. But….”
 
Grace looked at her and nodded. “But….”
 
“Well, one of my old friends, you know, one of Terry’s old friends wants to talk to me. He whispered it in my ear. I didn’t know how to take it. Jenn says I’m acting like a fifteen-year-old girl getting all hot and bothered.”
 
“Do you want to have a boyfriend?”
 
“Not like that. No, I want to have guy friends like my guys all relate to Jenn. You know, just content to be around them. I want to hang out with a group of friends. Just like the old days. But I need new friends."
 
“Don’t you have that now with those guys?”
 
“I don’t think so. I’m looked at as a freak. I mean, look at me! I’m not Terry!”
 
“What is this Teri wearing?”
 
“A tee, a hoodie, and a tennis skirt.”
 
“A skirt. Stand up and let me see.”
 
Teri stood up and stepped back from her laptop far enough away that Grace could see her from head to toe. She twirled around to show her how the skirt rose.
 
“Very pretty. I like it. Are you okay with the hem being short? Oh, and I like your flats, too. No sneaks and no Capris.”
 
Teri smoothed the skirt under his bottom before she sat down. “It’s different. If I wore a skirt in the past, it was with leggings. It’s good to see my uncovered legs. It reminds me of my choice.”
 
“Teri, remember this does not have to be written in stone. You’re allowed to change your mind and get off the boat.”
 
“Easy for you to say. Your body is not double-crossing you and making you all female. This was not part of the plan. I’m just trying to make the best of it.”
 
“Are you comfortable wearing a short skirt and ballet flats?”
 
“No, not yet. But I wear women's clothes every time Jersey Girl dresses me. So it’s like learning to walk in heels and do my hair.
 
“Okay, Teri. I will ask you to take a deep breath, close your eyes, look down, and let the air out slowly as you clear your mind. I want you to look up, and I will ask you a question. Got it?”
 
Teri took several deep breaths. Gina had been teaching them all deep breathing exercises. She took several deep breaths, long, slow inhales to fill her abdomen. Then she let each one out slowly until finally, her heart had slowed a bit, and she felt calm and relaxed.
 
When she had done this, she slowly looked up straight at the image of Grace Goldman on the monitor.
 
“Teri, without thinking, just tell me if you’re happy?”
 
She immediately smiled and simply shrugged like it was a given. “Yes.”
 
Grace paused for a moment and studied her face. She was more beautiful than her sister, Lisa, and she looked fresher, four years younger. While Grace was sizing her up, they made eye contact. Teri smiled and winked.
 
Grace stopped for a second. It was like they’d had a moment. She had to take a deep breath and let it out. She understood why all the Cats loved Teri. She understood the innocent magnetism she projected, making you want to wrap her in your arms and protect her. Grace had to put her professional brakes on immediately. Unless she wanted to end their seasons and direct her to a different counselor, she needed to pull back and get ahold of herself.
 
“Teri, you’re doing a great job handling the ups and downs being thrown at you. I’m going to give you an example. You can step back when you listen to music. You can define and decipher what’s there in front of you. You can be logical and free yourself up from convention. You rethink a rhythm or produce a song. You can transfer that talent in music to everything you do in life. I’m very impressed. And look forward to continue working with you to find the happiness that eludes you.”
 
“Grace, you are very encouraging and caring. One of the hardest parts for me is watching for ninety minutes each week. Your help has been on point, and you’ve made me think about my roadblocks and sort out my answers. I can only do some of it. I lack farsightedness. Maybe it’s because I haven’t finished growing up yet.”
 
He smiled. “But the hardest part is keeping my crush on you under control. I love that I have you as my counselor and friend. And Gina is the best. I admire her and think how lucky the two of you are to have found true love.”
 
Grace was about to reach for a tissue to blot a tear when Teri said, “See you next week, Grace. Thank you.” The screen went dark.
 
 
“Hey!”
 
“Hey, yourself. Whatcha doin?”
 
“I just got back from dropping Mom off at the airport. Now, I’m running into the house and going to the bathroom.”
 
“Want me to call you back?”
 
“Don’t be silly. I can do two things at once. So what’s on your schedule?”
 
“Not a thing until dinner. I was hoping we could have some time together.”
 
“Good. Let’s go to the mall.”
 
“Seriously? Why?”
 
“We’re just two girls going out to look at stuff. This is part of your training. I’ll pick you up in thirty. Oh, yeah. Wear some clothes that are easy to take off.”
 
“Huh?”
 
“Yep, we’re trying on stuff.”
 
Teri paused and thought before she said thank you and no thanks. She wondered why the whole idea sounded terrible. It was simple. She was scared. She’d spent very little time making public appearances since transitioning. Anytime in the past, when she’d be in public, she was with a crowd.
 
Teri tried to imagine walking through the mall with Jenn. Her girlfriend would walk slowly, looking at each window display. She’d see something that caught her eye and want to examine it further. That meant Teri would be paraded in one store and out others in public. Instead of being negative, she tried to sound upbeat. “Sure, honey. I love spending time with you.”
 
 
Jenn had left after they finished dinner at The Shelby. She said she wanted to go home and would see him downtown later. Of course, Phil and Richard had come as chaperones to ensure Tiffany didn’t accidentally order alcoholic beverages. Richard also wanted to fill them in on more details for next Saturday night in Atlanta.
 
“We fly in on Friday afternoon, check in to our hotel, and freshen up. After that, we gather with a few old friends from Gimli’s for dinner at the Underground. All the people you remember should be invited. If you want to bring your plus one, please do. We can be very generous now that you’re playing in an arena. And, oh yeah. With ten days to go, you only have six thousand tickets left to sell.”
 
Lisa was doing the math. “That doesn’t sound very good at all. If there were ten thousand seats and six thousand unsold…”
 
Richard was nodding. “Many people will buy tickets at the last minute, date-night kinda stuff. Which is good because dates spend more on merch.”
 
Terry knew that merch was short for merchandise. She’d seen a bunch of shirts, hats, and jackets. There was also a souvenir photo album of the Cats with brief biographies. Everything had been approved by Richard.
 
“No. Let me clarify. So far, Gimli has sold thirteen thousand tickets. We are financially in the black with this. Even with a local band on the docket, you still take home a big payday.”
 
Teri stared at Richard.
 
“Yeah, Teri. I know you want to hear the bottom line. Well, you are each guaranteed fifty grand for the show after expenses. If we sell more tickets and merch, it goes up. Everything is transparent. All the books will be presented to Gina’s dad for examination.”
 
The Wildcats all smiled at each other. The pressure was off, having sold enough tickets to keep them riding high. They’d stepped up to the big time, Teri thought. Staying with the Wildcats had been her personal sacrifice back at spring break. When she’d decided to help Lisa and the band get discovered by singing and playing with them as the fifth member, she’d be disguised as Tasha all summer.
 
Now, discovering her intersex diagnosis and the puberty happening inside her body, her jump to the Wildcats was a blessing for her, too. Teri had a future and a pretty exciting life ahead. “I wish Bill Wiggins knew about this.”
 
“Oh, he does. He’s a big partner on Gimli’s side. He went all in for Warner’s. He told me that the company is now dropping singles from the album to get air time on the radio and online subscriptions like Sirius, Amazon, Sonos, Pandora, and Tunein. They’ve even got some live tracks up on YouTube. Tickets will continue to sell until the place is sold out.”
 
Lisa’s head was swimming. She used to pride herself on her business acumen. But now all of that management stuff went out the window. She was just one of the band.
 
Teri leaned over and whispered. “Well, you finally got your wish to be above all the everyday stuff, freeing you up to play.”
 
Lisa smiled and wiped a tear. “Yeah, it’s bittersweet. I’m kinda useless now.”
 
Teri grabbed her arm. “You’re kidding, right? You’re still the boss. Everyone still looks to you for direction. The Wildcats are still your band.”
 
“Still, huh?”
 
Zoe was listening in. “Wah, wah. If I can’t make the bookings, find cheap hotels, pay for gas, and drive the van, I don’t want to be a Wildcat. Wah!”
 
Lisa laughed. “I guess you’re right. It’s more like giving up control and handing it to someone else. And then watching Richard and Phil do a much better job.”
 
Teri smacked her on the shoulder. “Yeah, remember me. Giving up control of your body and mind sucks, too. Especially when Mother Nature springs all of this on your eighteenth birthday!”
 
Lisa stood up and struck her back on the shoulder. “Yea, sis. And you know what, you hit like a girl, too.” The sisters were ready to have a mock argument that always ended with 'Mother always liked you better!’
 
Tiffany came over and stood between them. “There’s no fighting between Wildcats. We settle our disagreements differently, like leg wrestling!”
 
Gina laughed. “No leg wrestling. We don’t have time for Urgent Care tonight. We’ve gotta work.”
 
Zoe raised her hand. “Ooh. Call on me, call on me!”
 
Gina looked at Zoe. “I see that our Zoe plus one has a hand up.”
 
“I say Rock, paper, scissors!”
 
They all cheered and made a circle.
 
After Lisa won with scissor-cutting paper, Teri came over to Zoe and gave her a big hug. “So it’s all real. You’re a plus one, huh? I’ve got a perfect name, whether it’s a boy or girl.”
 
Zoe shook her head at Teri, grinning. “No. No baby of mine is going to be called Teri. One Teri in my world is plenty!”