Mom took me with her to their room. “Do we need to pull the plug on Cinderella and let Matt surface? I can help with taking the makeup off and you can wear your Dad’s robe to go up and change out of these clothes. I'll take responsibility for the decision.”

I shook my head emphatically, ‘No.’ Something inside of me was sure I didn’t want to do that. “No, I just need some time and space to decide for myself. If I decide to do it; it needs to be my decision… Mom, it was funny that I was able to get those voices down and sing along with the others… I doubt if Joel would want a younger guy cutting in on his turf, even if I was good enough?”

Later, Cousin Laurie came and said, “You must be practicing those three songs and artists. Ask your mother, for permission to go with us to the Rendezvous and possibly sing.”

After I went to my bedroom, Mom came up. I guess she wanted to be supportive, but it including encouragement if helpful. “Matt, you know if you want to sing as Marti at the Rendezvous you’d have our blessing. It needs to be what you want and not because the pressure was put upon you. Your Aunt, Uncle, Dad, and I have heard Julie over a year ago and she puts on a good show. I found it interesting that a guy could be so convincing like Julie was that night.”

I said, “But Mom didn’t it gross you out to see a guy in drag?”

She half-heartedly giggled, “No more than seeing you the past few days. You make a pretty convincing girl, but I know it’s the same you.”… “I swear, I could see you as Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood. I might be prejudice but I thought you changed your voice pretty well to sound like each of them. If you want I know some places that might have some cheap gowns this time of year. We could go looking tomorrow morning so we wouldn’t cut into your fun with the others.”

While I wasn’t interested in singing in front of people, 'trying on slinky dresses kind of excited me. I wasn’t ready to tell my mom that I was excited about crossdressing. Essie has been pushing me, but what if I told her I liked it?'

Mom was texting someone and I asked who? Mom said let’s go downstairs and I’ll tell you. I cleaned my face and made sure it was presentable. And then I joined mom and the others downstairs. “So who were you texting?”

Mom drew me to the side, “Quiet, you don’t want everyone knowing and going with us. …I text Essie, thinking you’d want her along. And she’s said yes. We’ll pick her up by 8 o’clock and then get some breakfast and be ready for the store when it opens.”

“Mom, you’re not expecting me to go to breakfast as Marti, are you?”

Mom said, “You don’t want Matt to be the one trying on the dresses, do you?” I wasn’t thinking that far ahead. “If you dress properly, with your makeup done lightly; you’ll only be seen as Marti.”

I got a text and checked my phone it was a smiley face from Essie. “Julie said if the dresses and you look good; he’ll have a spot for you Thursday. He already likes your voices.”

Laurie, Darby, and I go to another room watching a girl flick. We’re talking during much of the movie. Laurie begins to giggle, “I can’t believe how much of a girl you’ve become Marti.”

Darby is sitting up next to me, “Purse your lips?” I did and she painted them a luscious red. She asked me to make different faces as a girl. Again I did as asked and the two enjoyed it. They gave me tips and showed me some pics of Taylor, Underwood, and others. They encouraged me to wet my lips before I took a sip of water, as not to leave lipstick on the glass.

‘I wondered did they know, how much I was coming to enjoy all of the attention and small things I was learning?’

Laurie goes under my skirt and pinches my leg, “Keep them together young lady.” I quickly closed my legs. I was partly angry at her, but I knew I should apologize or thank her. I brought my legs together and did none of the above.

I was surprised by the boutique that Mom or Darby found some dresses and outfits that were more costume types, while others were seconds or mildly used. Looking at pictures Darby had on her tablet, we found two dresses that would fit the bill. Essie sent a picture of one to Julia; who jokingly said we should buy one in her size.

“Which one should I get,” I asked?

Essie, Mom, and Darby all looked at me like I said something crazy. Mom said, “We’re getting both plus a long slip for the dress and a short half-slip for the Taylor Swift outfit.”

I spoke up, “You don’t expect me to change clothes between songs?” I was assured if there was a time that was necessary it was as a female impersonator. I learned since they even had more plans than that.

Essie said, “You’ll feel better in singing as Taylor Swift in an outfit more fitting your image of her. Plus, when you let down your hair in the long gown, you are much more convincing as Carrie.”

Mom took me to a department store, insisting I needed to get a pair of large hoops or dangling earrings. “You pick out two pairs you like and I’ll get you a pair of each. They can be changed as part of the show.”

I literally stomped down my foot, “I didn’t say for sure I was singing!”

Mom said, “We just paid some good money for shoes, clothes, and the slips. You already agreed to sing and enjoy doing so. You will need to practice your songs again today and tomorrow morning along with selecting another song of Underwood, Swift, or another female singer.”

We went home where I needed not only to practice my songs but dress and do my hair and makeup as each woman. I was singing my third time through when I stepped in front of a mirror. I was tickled to see myself dressed and singing as Taylor Swift. It struck me that they’re much slimmer than me. I made the mistake of saying so.

You know Matt, there are things you can do as Marti to slim down. It was then that they introduced me to a body shaper. They had bought it without my knowing.

Darby and Laurie pushed me into my room with Laurie saying, “Don’t come out without it on or we’ll be in there to help put it on you.”

I started to say something smart like, “I’ll lock my door first.”

With that, they opened the door enough to put something in the way. I relented as I actually wanted to see how it would look. I got it up my legs and barely over my rear; then I needed help. Once it was on, I noticed my waist shrunk and it pushed up some fat to add the look of breasts.

After my dress practice Wednesday evening, I changed into a skirt and blouse of Darby’s to eat pizza with the others. My stomach didn’t feel like I had any room, but I was hungry.

Darby took me to our bathroom and showed me how to remove my makeup. I resisted using a moisturizer until they insisted it was just for tonight and tomorrow after the show.

Thursday morning, I intended to practice singing once through the songs. I ended up singing for over an hour. Mom played some songs by Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Carrie, and others. I would hum or sing along as I knew them, but mostly I was listening.

Finally, I asked my mom, “How can someone ever really copy them; they’re so good?”

She sat me down, “If ever you get a chance, like tonight. You just do the best you can and try enjoying it. If you do that people will enjoy themselves and like what you’ve done.”

Essie and my mother took me to Essie’s salon and Hope did my makeup for being in front of bright lights. It was the first time I learned it needed to be different so the lights didn’t wash out my look. The first was to look like Taylor Swift. Then Hope showed Essie and my Mom what to do to help me to change my appearance over to that of Carrie.

I chimed in, “I can do it.” Hope’s gaze was one of amusement. Essie said, “Don’t take offense but no you can’t, not yet at least.” What she meant by, ‘not yet at least.’

I watched as Hope explained what to do and while it did not seem like anything extraordinary. I understood it took a special touch. We soon packed what we needed and left the salon. We veiled my ‘Taylor Swift’ like appearance with a scarf, it’s touch was light and merely glided over my makeup without messing it.

We were to meet Julia early at the club. She wanted to both see me and my outfits and to hear me sing as each artist. Julia greeted Essie with an air-kiss to each cheek and a light hug. He thank my mother for allowing me to be here. I drew back and took off the scarf. Julia’s expression was followed by, “Oh my you are darling… Taylor Swift might be jealous.”

Julia allowed us to relax, hang my clothes, and settle in. When she saw my hair and my crochet and lace dress she asked for my CDs and picked out Swift’s one Last Christmas and once I was ready, I began singing there backstage. It was the second song that I began to feed off of Julia, Essie, and mom’s presence. Julia said afterward that I did better with each song. She said she would have me start singing as Swift with O Holy Night with her Julia and then have me continue with two of her songs. I would be invited to sing as Carrie during another portion of her show.

I kept apologizing that Essie had probably pressed Julia to allow me to sing. I was sure I would come across as a poor amateur who shouldn't be there.

We had a chicken salad sandwich and a small glass of Seven-up. Mom and Essie watched over me to make sure I didn’t spill anything on my clothes or hurt my makeup. I had to stay out of sight as the people were seated and when Julia’s show started. Then I sat in the back and off to the side without making a sound.

My cue was when Julia said, “I want to sing a song with one of you.” Then she said, “Oh my Taylor Swift will you please come on up.” She started to sing, O Holy Night as I grabbed a microphone. I let her sing a few lines before I came in as Taylor Swift. There was applause for both of us. I could hear a few positive whispers about my clothes, appearance, and especially my voice sounding like Taylor. Some knew of Taylor’s Christmas album as I broke into Last Christmas You Broke My Heart. I was nearing the end of Santa Baby when the applause began and grew. I was overwhelmed and was ready to cry, but I knew I couldn’t. Julia came out saying. “That’s little Marti Carstens, she’ll be back later if you’d like.” I walked off stage to more applause. I was surprised to see Hope from the salon.

“I just had to come and hear you,” she said. “You were fantastic but we need to get you changed and ready to be Carrie.” I was there in a changing room; mom and Hope were with me as I undressed and put on the long white dress with silver accents to be Carrie Underwood. Hope quickly changed my hairstyle taking out some of the curls and made it the wavy flowing hair more Carrie’s style. My facial expressions changed as I practiced switching to Carrie’s voice.

When I looked up and smiled; it was as though Carrie was singing back to me. I said, “Mommy, I don’t know if I can do this.”

Mom calmly said, “You are doing very well Honey. I believe you can.”

“Mom, I was caught by surprise, I was going to sing ‘O Holy Night’ for Carrie.” Julia heard the end of what I said as he had taken a break. Joel said he was sorry, “I was going to be asked for another song, and planned for that one to be “Jesus Take the Wheel.”

Without thinking, I said, “There’s ‘Before He Cheats, What Child is This, and Do you Hear What I Hear.”

He said, “If you’d let me begin with one song and welcome Carrie you could sing those, and I’ll be back up encouraging you to sing one more. You should start and close with upbeat songs and use her melodious voice to sing the two Christmas standards.”

He excused himself to change and to notify the sound person of the songs and then refresh his makeup. It turned out Julia did two songs as one singer and would change again while I was singing. It was now after 10 o’clock when I sang again and my singing as Carrie was well received.

‘Before He Cheats’, perked the audience up and was good time Underwood. ‘What Child Is This’ and ‘Do You Hear, What I Hear’ came across beautifully more like prayers. I hoped people did not see my goosebumps as I was closing the last song.

Julia came back on and asked me to sing another Christmas song and I acted like Jesus Take the Wheel had nothing to do with Christmas and then I said, “O Yes, that trip was on Christmas Eve.” The song began and the college boys, who helped park cars, were in by the bar when I began to sing. Those who liked the Christmas songs, liked it because it was a prayer of desperation and faith. I received a standing ovation. A bouquet of flowers was the last thing I expected, but it resonated with me and I loved it.

Once off stage and back to where I could sit, I cried. Hope said, “I sure hope those are happy tears.”

I responded, “I never knew there could be happy tears, but yes they are. I’m nervous because I don’t think this can be real, or that I did that. But I loved it.”

Hope helped me change into my regular girl clothes and helped to take off my stage makeup and put on a new face. We could hear Julia and she was doing well. I was changed and sitting back with Hope in the crowd. I was impressed, Julia is such a professional performer.

People that left with the end of the program came over to congratulate me. The crowd was split whether I was a girl or a boy. Essie stood up saying, “I like my girlfriends but I don’t kiss them. This is my boyfriend.” With that, she gave me a big hug and a kiss.”

“Um, I like your lips like that sweetie,” Essie said. “Wait until the next time…”

To be continued…