When we arrived at the office the next morning, we didn’t get much time to talk things over. Crime Stoppers had received a tip off that the killer was living in a terraced house in Crouch End. Naturally, we went mob handed which included full riot gear and body armour. In the end, it turned out to be nothing more than a man who had systematically killed almost all the local tomcats because they kept him awake at nights. Many of us felt like real idiots but the press seemed to be satisfied that we were taking the murders seriously.

We did finish the day with one less serial killer on the streets of London. Unfortunately for us, it was the wrong one but at least the press had something to crow about.

Caitlin didn’t say much when I said goodbye to her that evening. Neither of us was roistered for duty over the weekend so in lieu of any decision from her, I told her that I’d see her on Monday.

I’d just settled down at home for the evening when the doorbell rang. I groaned as I got up to see who it was. I was halfway through painting my nails for the weekend so I was in no mood for a doorstep salesman or a local politician canvassing for votes for the forthcoming election.

I carefully opened the door and to my surprise, I found Caitlin standing there.

She smiled at me and dropped the bombshell.

“Ok. I’ll do it.”

I almost went and kissed her but I’m glad I didn’t as she followed it up with the inevitable,

“On one condition.”

My heart sank.

“You’d better come in. I get a feeling that I’m going to have to be sitting down to hear this.”

I stood aside and let her into my home for the first time. As she passed me I got the smell of perfume. I gave myself a small smile. I’d never know her to wear anything more that some deodorant to work.

As I shut the door behind her my mind went back to trying to guess what her conditions were.

“Please come into the sitting room and sit down,” I said desperately trying not to mess up my nails.

I sat down opposite her and waited for the bombshell to drop.

Instead, she started giggling.

“I’m sorry,” she gasped between laughs.

It took her several minutes to stop and regain her composure.

“I’m so sorry for that. It was just the picture of you doing your nails. I’ll just have to get used to it I suppose.”

I began to feel a little less concerned.

“It is actually quite fortuitous that you are doing your nails. My condition is that we spend the weekend together just to prove to me that we can even attempt this crazy operation together.”
Then she added,
“And not end up killing each other…”

Her condition was just about the last thing I’d expected. I was stunned.

Caitlin smiled at me.

“The cat got your tongue?”

I tried to say something but nothing would come out.

I gave up and went to get her a drink. I poured two generous shots of Scotch. I knew that she was partial to Scotch and surprisingly for someone from Ireland, she didn’t like the Irish version of Whisky.

As I handed her the glass, I finally managed to speak.

“Caitlin, I don’t know what to say…”

She smiled back at me.

“How about ‘Thank you’?”

“Thanks.” I muttered and put my glass out towards her.

She took my hint and our glasses chinked.

“Sláinte,” I said.

“Sláinte,” replied Caitlin.

I sat down and took another swig from my glass.

“What are your plans for the weekend then? You do have some don’t you?”
As soon as the words came out of my mouth I realised what a fool I’d been.

“Well, that is obviously a silly question, you would not be here if you didn’t have one.”

She laughed.

“Sort of. First, I want to see your wardrobe.”

“Eh?”

“If you are going to be a woman then you must have the right clothes. All the trannies I’ve ever met were so badly dressed, it was easy to pick them out in a crowd.”

She made sense even though I was not going to like her examination of my undies drawer one little bit.

I sipped a little more Scotch and then stood up.

“Ok then, let’s get the next bit of humiliation over and done with,” I said with more than a hint of resignation in my tone.

Caitlin followed me into my bedroom.

I slid open the door to my wardrobe.

“There you go. Do your worst.”

“I’m sure it won’t be that bad,” joked Caitlin as she began looking through my clothes.

It was.

Within five minutes there was a sizeable pile of my ‘stuff’ on the bedroom floor.

Caitlin finished her sorting and turned to me with an evil grin on her face.

“There, that wasn’t too bad, now was it?”

I looked at the few items remaining.

“That doesn’t leave me with much to wear, does it?”

Caitlin smiled and looked at her watch.

Then she grabbed one of the few outfits left and thrust it into my hand.

“Get ready and we’ll go shopping.”

“At this time of night? It’s almost seven?”

“Westfield is just down the road, isn’t it? Aren’t they open until ten on Fridays”

I wanted to say something but I thought better of it.

I glared at Caitlin who took the hint and left me alone thoughtfully shutting the door behind her.

I got dressed as quickly as possible being careful not to trip over the pile of clothes in the middle of the floor in the process. I put on the black wig that had been sitting on a wig stand on my dresser. The final touch was to slip on a pair of low-heeled shoes.

After checking myself in the mirror, I left my bedroom and said to a slightly surprised Caitlin,

“Come on then lets’ get going!”

She gave me the once over and responded with a small smile. I guess I passed muster for the time being.

She put on her coat and left my flat. It had started to rain so we literally ran down to the main road and piled into a Taxi.

“Westfield, Shepherds Bush please,” said a slightly breathless Caitlin.

Fifteen minutes later the Taxi dropped us outside the shopping centre. Caitlin paid the driver and we went inside.

I’d been there quite a few times before but never with the express aim of buying a load of clothes, female clothes. I’d often wandered into stores and looked at buying things but I nearly always chickened out trying things on. I was always embarrassed about other women seeing my false breasts. Now I had what was soon to look like proper ones it didn’t seem to bother me any longer.

When Caitlin thrust some clothes into my hands saying,
“Go and try them on,”

I didn’t argue with her, I went.

“That looks good on you,” remarked Caitlin as I paraded the outfit.

I looked at myself in the mirror.

‘Not bad’ I thought to myself ‘but…’

“It’s hardly my colour, is it?”

Caitlin giggled.

I stared at her with my hands on my hips.

“And exactly what do you mean by that?”

“Can’t you take a joke?”

I stormed back into the changing room before I said something I’d live to regret.

By the time the centre closed, I’d spent a good deal of money and not all of it on myself. Still, I was reasonably happy that so far, Caitlin hadn’t gone off saying ‘no I won’t do it’.

We took a taxi back to my home picking up a Sweet and Sour Pork Balls with Rice on the way.

It was well after midnight and the pile of empty food cartons and wine glasses were left for the morning, we went to bed. Well, I went to bed and Caitlin slept on the pull-out bed in the sitting room. I gave her a nightdress and wished her goodnight before escaping into my bedroom. I needed to think. My mind was both happy and confused. Happy that I’d gone obtained some half decent clothes but confused as to why Caitlin had just taken over like that. That in itself wasn’t out of kilter for her but as to why she’d done it was beyond me.

As a result, sleep didn’t come easily. I had so much on my mind that I tossed and turned for several hours.

Just before dawn, I woke up to feel someone getting into my bed. From the smell, it was Caitlin.

“Wha…”

“Shhh. Go back to sleep,” she whispered.

She wrapped an arm around my waist and settled down. There wasn’t really anywhere I could go. My bed wasn’t some luxurious king or queen-sized bed. It was more of a large single. There was just about room for the two of us provided neither one of us wanted to turn over.

After a while, I relaxed and fell asleep as Caitlin’s right hand gently massaged my right breast. It just felt right.

Sadly, the call of nature could be denied only for so long so just before seven, I slipped out of bed and made for the bathroom hoping not to wake Caitlin.

When I returned she’d taken over the whole bed so I shrugged my shoulders and headed for the kitchen stopping only to grab my dressing gown from the back of the door.

After putting some fresh coffee on to brew, I cleared away the remains of last night’s meal as quietly as possible. Then I realised that I was stuck. Saturday morning was my normal time to clean the house. The rest of the week, I was I have to admit, not as tidy as I could have been but by Saturday lunchtime, the place was clean and very tidy once more. Suddenly I have someone else to consider. Someone who hated getting up in the morning.

I sat down and poured myself another cup of coffee.

This was going to be a lot harder than I thought. An awful lot harder.

-0-

It was well past nine the next morning before Caitlin stirred. She came into the kitchen rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

“I missed you. It was nice and comfortable back there in bed.”

I glared at her then I realised that she was pulling my leg.

“That bed of yours is far too small for two people to share.”
“Well, it wasn’t bought with two people in mind. Besides, I left you in here last night,” I replied as I poured her some tea.

Caitlin was a tea only drinker in the morning. The first cup had to be strong. These little things one soon picks up when one is very much the junior partner in a team.

I sat back and let her drink her tea.

“What are your plans for the day?” asked Caitlin as she put down the now empty mug.

“I normally spend Saturday mornings doing the housework.”

Caitlin had trouble keeping the sniggers away.

“Wearing that maids outfit I saw last night I suppose?”

Without thinking, I replied,

“I have two outfits you know.”

Caitlin went red in the face. Strike one for me.

“Ok then.”

Bugger. One all.

In the end, we had some fun doing the housework. I think both of us began to unwind and relax. I did find out something about her that worried me.

Caitlin was a slob. At home, she was a slob. Well compared to me she was. Compared to her I was neat and tidy about everything at home. I wondered if this might be a problem if we had to live together for the duration of the operation.

Caitlin was finishing off in the bathroom as I went and made us some lunch.

The smell of frying bacon brought her prancing into the kitchen when she’d finished.

“That wasn’t so bad now was it? Being a Maid for a while?”

Caitlin laughed.

“Ok. You win. I haven’t done as much cleaning as that for a long time.”

I thought to myself that it didn’t seem like that when I was there the other day.

Caitlin must have seen my concern.

“The owner of my place employs someone to come in twice a week so I don’t have to do much apart from my laundry.”

I smiled back at her. It was going to be a problem… if we did this undercover thing.

Over Bacon Sandwiches, we talked about what we should do for the rest of the day. Inevitably, the topic of shopping came up. Inwardly, I groaned inwardly as I really didn’t want a repeat of the previous evening and its accompanying humiliation that she’d put me through.

Thankfully, Caitlin saw my concern and promised not to humiliate me again. She volunteered to wear the Maids outfit and clean my flat on her own if she did. I tried really hard to get her to wear it into the office but she wouldn’t budge which was probably the right decision.

As I did the dishes after lunch, I had to admit to myself that Caitlin was a pretty nice person once you got past the hard shell she put on when we were at work. That made me sad, sad that she felt that she had to hide behind a façade at work.

I finished doing the dishes and went to find Caitlin. She was getting changed in my bedroom. As I walked in through the door, she let out a little scream and covered herself with a blanket.

As soon as she realised what she’d done, she burst out laughing.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it. It is perfectly natural. I should have knocked.”

“No. It’s your bedroom after all.”

Then I asked her.

“Caitlin, please don’t take this the wrong way, but what are you hiding from everyone at work? Today you have relaxed and I’ve seen a side of you that you keep hidden when you are at work.”

She looked totally surprised by my question.

For a second I thought that she might blow her top. After all, she was well known in the squad for her fiery temper when put on the spot.

To my eternal relief, she didn’t explode.

Instead, Caitlin looked me hard in the eye and after a little pause said,

“I know. It is very hard for me. I feel that I have to keep up a front. Being a woman and from Northern Ireland means that I have to prove myself twice over.”

Sunday morning saw me alone in the kitchen just after seven. I cleared away the things from the night before but dithered about switching on the Coffee maker.

I was undecided because I was feeling guilty about not having visited my ‘Dojo’ in more than four weeks. Sensei Arai would be annoyed with me. He wanted me to take my 5th Dan exam but I wasn’t sure. The extra training I’d need to do, coupled with my job and of course my transitioning was just a few too many things to handle at the same time.

I felt that I needed to go to the Dojo and spend an hour or so training but I wasn’t sure about the reception I’d get now that I was probably no longer living as a man.

As I pondered the options, I remembered something that my shrink had told me more than two years ago when I’d decided that it was time to be myself at long last.

The lovely Dr Miriam Jenkins had told me,

“When you accept that you are living as a woman and it does not bother you, then you have transitioned.”

Standing there in my Kensal Rise Kitchen on that lovely Sunday morning, it didn’t bother me at all furthermore the realisation that I didn’t care made my mind up for me. I would go to the Dojo and to hell with what anyone would say.

I hurriedly scribbled a note for Caitlin, got dressed in some old clothes and dashed out the door grabbing the bag with my uniform in it as I went.

Less than twenty minutes later I walked into the ‘Harrow Road Dojo’ thanks to the prompt arrival of a No 18 bus.

Sensei Arai greeted me with a deep bow, as is custom in the Dojo. I returned it. Whilst I was still bowed, I said,

“Master, I am sorry for not attending your honoured Dojo these past four weeks.”

“Apologies accepted. I can sense that you have something more important on your mind.”

I came up from the bow and asked.

“Master?”

“I see you have finally accepted that your female side is your life.”

I smiled and bowed.

“Yes Master.”

“I am pleased. I have a surprise for you today. You will work out with Chen Li.”

I am sure I went white in the face. Chen was the Dojo ‘top Dan’. She could whip any man in the Dojo to a pulp in minutes. I was not looking forward to meeting her on the mat.

Sensei Arai sensed my unease.

“Don’t worry my honoured pupil. I will tell her to go easy on you.”

If the beating I received in the following half hour were Chen Li going easy, I would hate to think what she would do to someone when she was angry.

My only saving grace was that I did at least manage to land a few good blows on her before I submitted to her onslaught.

As I left the Dojo, Master Arai stopped me.

“Yes Master. How can I be of assistance?”

“You did well today. Chen does not like people like you. You landed some excellent blows against her. Blows worthy of a 5th Dan.”

I was stunned. Master had set me up.

He continued.

“My Daughter and esteemed pupil, Chen will not take her anger out on you any longer. She will be your Master from now on when you return to study for your next level.”

I bowed to him.

“Yes Master.”

He returned my bow.

When I returned to my flat, I found Caitlin sitting in the kitchen reading the Sunday paper.

“Did you have a good workout?”

“Yes. Well a bit. Mistress Chen does not know when to ease up.”

“Mistress Chen? Tell me more,” asked Caitlin suddenly very interested.

I smiled back.

“Not that sort of Mistress. She is the daughter of my Master. The terms refer to your instructor. You are his pupil therefore he is your Master,” I replied trying to keep things as simple as possible.

“You fought this Mistress Chen?”

“Yes, and I’ll have the bruises in a few days to prove it.”

She giggled.

Then she put the paper down.

“We need to talk about tomorrow and I need to go home and sort out my stuff.”

“Do you really think that the ‘brass’ will go for it?”

She thought for a moment before answering.

“When you floated the idea to me, I thought you were mad. Totally bonkers and certainly certifiable but then I thought about it a lot and what swayed me was the fact that whoever is doing this is very good. So far, we have at least six victims and he has made absolutely no mistakes. Absolutely no evidence at all as to who he is.”

She sighed.

“If I was running the investigation, I’d be tearing my hair out. I’d have to consider just about any way to catch the bastard. So yes, I think they will but….”

She swallowed hard before replying,

“I’m worried about you.”

“Me? Why?”

“I know you can take care of yourself but what happens afterwards? How much thought have you given to what you are going to do after this is all over?”

“I don’t understand?”

“Do you really think that you can continue as a police officer? You know how funny the force can be about people who are…. different.”

“I know. That why I’ve been talking to ACC Bishop.”

Caitlin shook her head.

“It does not matter one iota what the top brass says or does, it is those of us on the ground that matter. As the Americans say, ‘it is the grunts that do the work.’”

She thought for a second.

“Take Billy Mitchell for example. He’ll never accept you. Not in a million years. You saw how he reacted when he had to interview that tranny in the Cummins case last year. Ok, so the tranny was just a man in a dress and it showed but as far as he was concerned, it was the tranny who was guilty despite having nothing to do with the murder.”

I remembered the incident all too clearly.

“But he works with Sammy Franks. What is the difference?”

Caitlin laughed.

“He was told in no uncertain terms that if he didn’t accept that Sammy was gay and that Sammy was not going to rape him at the first opportunity then his career would be over. No questions, no arguments. ACC Bishop read him the riot act. “

“She could do it again?”

She shook her head.

“He’s far too subtle to do anything out in the open. A hint here, an innuendo there and the damage is done.”

I knew that what she’d said was true. Some people would not accept me no matter what.

“I guess you are for once talking a good deal of sense. That’s what partners are for aren’t they?”

I smiled.

“Don’t worry, I’ll find something to do.”

Then I wiped the smile off my face.

“To be able to live as a woman is something I’ve wanted to do since I was eight or nine years old. I won’t let something like this get in the way of that.”

Before Caitlin could reply both of our mobile phones bleeped as they received a text message.

This could only mean one thing, bad news.

My worst fears were confirmed when we saw the cryptic message ‘CTW’, meaning ‘Circle the Wagons’ which meant everyone had to drop everything and report for work. Coming at this time on a Sunday could only mean one of two things, the killer had been caught or another body had been found.

“What are we going to do?” I asked.

Caitlin smiled back at me.

“You are going to call Godzilla and explain. I’ll go into work and tell them that you are out of town and can’t get back until Monday. You’d better turn you phone off as well because you know how Billy likes to dig into things. I wouldn’t put it past him to try and track your phone.”

I just nodded. She was right.

“Yeah, I can’t go into the office looking like this, now can I?”

I still had my Tae-Kwon-Do uniform on.

Caitlin laughed.

“I was more thinking of your eyebrows. I think I might have gone too far with the tweezers last night.”

I smiled back.

“No. The time has come. This is as good as any. So, do you need to go home to get changed?”

She thought for a second.

“No, I’ll make do with what I’ve got here. Let’s both of us get changed then?”

With that, she stripped stark naked in front of me and then ran into the shower. As I realised what she’d done, I glared after her. She’d outsmarted me once again.

While she was showering, I decided that I would go into the Office as well and hang the consequences.

Two hours later, I took a deep breath and pressed the lift button for the 6th floor. Caitlin squeezed my hand and smiled.

“I’m here.”

“Yeah, two steps behind me.”

She didn’t get a chance to answer as the doors opened. We were there.

Our heels clicked on the floor as we walked into the office. It was a buzz of activity.

Then one by one our colleagues noticed us. First off, they saw the new Caitlin. Then they wondered who was with her. Then the realisation set in. As we walked to our desks the place became silent. Many mouths were open in surprise.

Our boss looked up from his desk. The sudden silence had alerted him.

He came to the door of his office.

He saw Caitlin and myself.

“Well? Why aren’t you morons getting on with your work? We have a serial killer to catch,” said our boss to the rest of the team.

Then he turned to us.

“You two! My office NOW!”

We followed him into his office. He made sure that the door was closed behind us.

“Whatever joke this is that you are trying to pull, I find it in really bad taste. Another victim has been found and you two turn up looking like this. And you Jamie! What the fuck do you think you are playing at?”

He sat down at his desk.

“I really don’t care what the fuck you get up to at weekends but to come in here looking like some tart from Soho when we have a killer to find, really takes the biscuit. It really does. What have you got to say for yourselves?”

“Sir!” began Caitlin.

I touched her arm.

She stopped talking

“Sir. My name from now on is Isabel. I am a transsexual. ACC Bishop knows all about my wish to be known henceforth as Isabel.”

“God…. ACC Bishop knows all about this?”

“Yes Sir. She does.”

By now, he was very red in the face.

“You two get out of here.”

He glared at me.

“And you, Jamie, Isabel or whoever you are, I don’t ever want to see you again. Understand?”

“But Sir. Acc Bishop says…”

“Frankly, I don’t give two fucks what Godzilla says of thinks. You are no longer a member of this squad. Got it?”

Caitlin had for her been strangely silent throughout this exchange.

“Does this apply to me Sir?”

He glared at Caitlin. Normally, she’d be dressed to blend into the background. Today, she was in a very short denim skirt, yellow tights and a pretty skimpy top.

“What do you think?”

With that, we were dismissed.

We left the office and saw a sea of faces, expectant faces, looking at is.

Caitlin gripped my arm.

I looked at her wondering what was going on.

She gave me a little smile.

Then she grabbed me and kissed me. Passionately.

I really had no choice but to respond.

Slowly a round of applause enveloped the whole office.

Our Boss came out of his office even redder in the face.

“You two! OUT NOW before I have you arrested for perverting the course of justice.”

His unfortunate use of the word ‘perverting’ caused a lot of laughter amongst our now former colleagues.

We walked out of the office to a round of applause that was cut short by a loud voice shouting, ‘Get the fuck back to work. We have a killer to catch’.

Once outside the office, I grabbed Caitlin by the arm.

“Why did you do that?”

“What?”

“You know very well what. That kiss?”

She giggled.

“I don’t know. It just seemed like a good idea at the time besides, he pissed me off no end.”

I just glared at her.

She gave me a little smile.

“At least they are all on our side now.”

“Thank heaven for small mercies. So, what do we do now?”

“Go and get a coffee. Then we go and see Godzilla.”

I took a deep breath and said,

“No, we go and see ACC Bishop right now. I think we need to get that over with before we brave the canteen.”

Caitlin didn’t disagree.

“Will she be here?”

I smiled.
“Her car and driver were outside when we came in so I’d say yes, she is in the building.”

[to be continued]