The next week, Mom told Faith and I, we're going to summer camp. It was even the one I had wanted to go to as Ronnie. That’s ironic, I was stealing things so I could go as Ronnie and now the opportunity is being given to Janelle when I don’t deserve it. I was crying happy tears. Both sisters were there giving be a hard time for being more girly then they are. Lucky for them, they don’t understand. I was excited about being at a camp with horse riding, but even more I would see friends from last year.

Lacy was more than happy to help me get my summer wardrobe. Lacy is the only girl outside of my family who knows I was Ronnie. That is except Angie Jones, the student nurse and sister to Bobby.

Mom, Faith, Lacy and I go shopping for summer clothes for a full week at Camp. I’m surprised that Mom takes us to the stores at the Mall when she has her own store. Joyce told me it’ because ‘Mom knows going to the mall is part of a girl experience and we should have some of the same brands that other girls identify with.

We go right at nine in the morning as the stores are opening. We bumped into Angie while we were shopping. Angie’s a good professional and did not say anything. But I said, “Hi Angie,” and then looking around to see if anyone is with her. “How is Bobby enjoying his summer?”

Now Angie is looking at me and then looking around. “Do you have a minute that you and I can talk,” she asked?

I asked Lacy and Mom to give me a moment and walked with Angie so we could be alone. Angie said, “I couldn’t initiate anything, but thanks for asking. I talked to Bobby. He told me some of the stuff he goes through each year. You’re right, he’s braver than I ever realized. Nor did I know he’s such a girl.

“Unfortunately, our Mom won’t hear that it’s more than a phase. She’s insisted that he purge any girl clothes he had. His summer is turning out worse than the school year.”

I asked, “Did you mention about me and that he could talk to me?”

Angie’s sad eyes told me otherwise. “I didn’t know how to tell him without identifying you. I was afraid to tell him that someone knew about his cross-dressing. He didn’t know that I knew that much about him.”

“You mean you didn’t help him to dress at Halloween or at your Mardi Gras celebrations?” Angie looked surprised that I knew about their Mardi Gras party. "I looked for Bobby’s makeup this year because last year was one of the times I found makeup. I wasn’t disappointed." I even walked pass their house this year and wished I were invited to dress as he did.

When I told Angie I was going to summer camp she told me that Bobby was going to a church camp. I was very happy to learn it was the same program I was going to with horses. I told her, “You should send a girl’s outfit with me for him, as well as a girl’s bathing suit.”

“You wouldn’t,” Angie began to smile as I didn’t reply, “would you?”

“There is some of Ronnie’s daring still in me? Plus now I know how to better dress a boy as a girl.” Angie asked if I was still shopping for a while, but she hurried and left shortly after I said, “Here or at Mom’s store.”

We weren’t there long and I was afraid Angie would be upset if she came back and didn't find me.

Rachel and Jasmine were happy to see us when we got to Mom’s store. It was unusually busy, so Mom and I planned to spend the next half hour helping to wait on customers. Three girls were looking for summer clothes and I found what they were looking for with my help. Unfortunately, they chose some of the same clothes I thought were especially neat and wanted to buy. I noticed the inventory of summer clothes had depleted a lot over yesterday and today.

More customers continued to come in; people shopping in a store actually attract other shoppers. It is great for business. I know Mom’s store is not my personal closet but I've come to depend on it.

Lacy was able to shop on her own and already had her little pile started. Faith was even shopping, ugh!

Caroline had stopped with Jenny and I had the pleasure to help them. I would be seeing Jenny in the morning. Today, I knew there was a package of clothes waiting for Jenny and if her Mom liked what she saw we would probably order a few more items for them.

Jenny was happy with her clothes and she told me about my Mom buying the store next door just for her. I was amused that Jenny saw it that way. We had to measure Jenny as she had grown a full inch since earlier in the spring. “Her doctor actually thinks part of Jenny’s new growth spurt is tied to her being happy. She speculated that Jenny was stressed and her being happy indicates that stress has lightened significantly and more energy and nutrients are going toward her growth.

Mom is expanding to the store next to the one next to her. She is going to expand both her existing lines and begin to carry clothes for young girls beginning with girls eight years old and older. Her line would be more fashionable and better quality clothes than in most area stores, especially the large discount stores. It is not a whimsical idea. Rather I wanted to give girls a chance to become fashion savvy and have a choice of better quality clothing. There are now more cottage industry providers into young people’s fashions. Some who started with little kids clothes three to five years ago have a following for the clothes Mom would sell.

Three providers are to come in August and Mom plans to use Jenny as one of her models for a variety of outfits. Mom would actually tape part of the day in plans to use that for promoting the grand opening of the expanded store. It would be an ambitious plan, but Dad has told me that was the kind of Mom I have now.

It was after lunch when Angie tapped me on the shoulder and handed me a bag. The clothes were actually from Mom’s store. I had been busy enough I hadn’t noticed she was there. She handed me a second bag. The second bag had two pairs of panties, socks, and a towel. The first bag had a swimsuit, two shorts, and two tops. “I guess you took me pretty seriously. You know he and I could get in trouble.”

Angie commented, “I thought of that and I put a note in there for whatever it would be worth.”

“That will only mean, my and your actions would be premeditated.” She and I giggled.

Lacy had seen into the bags of clothes and asked, “What’s so special with the clothes?”

Angie looked at Lacy and then me. I quickly whispered to Angie, “She doesn’t know Bobby or what this is about.”

Totally surprising me, Angie tells Lacy, “It is for my brother; he’s going to be at the same summer camp program Janelle is going to.”

Lacy looked at me, “Seriously, what is going on?” I wasn’t sure I wanted to convince Lacy what Angie said was true.

Angie asked Lacy, “You need to promise not to tell anyone, less Janelle gets in big trouble.” Lacy smiled not sure what she was promising but agreed. Angie did us a favor and took Lacy home.

It was nearly 4:30 in the afternoon when I finally got to shop. I took time to stock the shelves and hang some more of the clothes I wanted to look at. While two of my first choices were gone, I was very happy with what I was getting. I was not sure if Hannah was upset with the two tops I selected or amused. Neither top would cover my midsection even before I would stretch. I have worked on my waist and it is now a pretty girl’s waist, very different from this spring.

I have taken to ordering sandals for me when my Mom orders footwear for her mannequins. One pair had come in along with three pairs I had ordered for customers. There is no mistake, Mom is not happy that I had done that without her permission. The result is I’m not going out Friday or Saturday night; I will be working until 8:00 p.m. both nights.

Faith actually bought twice as much as me. She is a year younger than me and it is her first summer as a teen. She has a great fashion sense with the styles and colors of clothes she likes. It is getting easier for me to tell who has raided whose closet. It is not likely that Joy would raid our clothes, but we both like her tastes. Mom asked why we don’t buy clothes like Joy’s. Faith and I laughed, “Because she does such a good job.”

Mom asked, “Janelle, what’s with the clothes that Angie gave to you today?” I had to tell as there could be no lying to her by me.

“Mom, Angie’s brother Bobby is going to the same summer camp program and he’s been more of a girl than I ever was as Ronnie.” I told Mom, “I only plan to give him an opportunity; I won’t force him nor embarrass him into doing anything he doesn’t want to do.”

“And you think he is going to just find a place and change and no one will notice?”

“I think there is a good possibility he might decide to; I have an idea on how it could work. If he decides not too or the opportunity doesn’t come, Angie can have the clothes back.” Mom and I talked some more. She knew I might end up being sent home from Camp. Mom asked me, “Is it worth the risk to you?”

Mom continued, “You know if they approve you to be in our family, they will be expecting you to be on good behavior?”

“Mom, if it is not at Camp with a friend there; it will happen and most likely with nobody there for him. It might not be a good risk, but it is better than the alternative.” Mom hugged me, she didn’t say I was right, but she did say, “I am proud of you. Please use very good discretion.”

I had two more games of summer league softball. It is funny trying to throw a ball or hit with a bat as my growing breasts get in the way or as Mom says, "This changes the way you do the same things as a girl." I had grand ideas of setting the softball world on fire. I am becoming a better player and next summer I hope to be ready for the freshmyn team.

CrossWays Camp has two junior high camps this week and next week and two high school camps the same weeks. Mom had oodles of forms to fill out and sign, while Faith and I have to carry our sleeping bags and our stuff a half mile to our campsites. Yes, there is a path that a camp vehicle could use to haul the stuff for us. They are afraid we would bring more things if they drove it down to the sites.

Our dwellings are supposed to be a hundred yards from the boy's campsite. It is more like a hundred and twenty feet if I remember right from last year. I already knew Teri, the counselor, and we are to have in our tree hut. If she does like she did last year she will be off smoking someplace, possibly this year with a boyfriend. I am kind of counting on it if Bobby is to be helped. The sleeping areas for students our age were glorified tree houses about fifteen feet above the ground.

Wearing short shorts is a new experience. It meant I had to shave all the way up and make sure hair didn’t show with the short shorts.

Walking down to my campsite I say hello to Shelby and Cadence as we arrive carrying our stuff down. I tell Shelby, “I like how your hair has changed and gotten longer since last year.” “Cadence, you’ve grown two inches.” I didn’t mention how she also blossomed. It was thirty minutes later when I said hello to Jayne Freese that Cadence confronts me.

“How is it you know us and none of us remember you?” I was caught off guard, I tried to tell them I was at camp and then I had to add I was probably in the other camp program.

Monday morning I woke up with a problem; my pajamas bottoms had blood on them. Shelby and another girl got on my case, “Don’t you keep track of when to expect your period?” My tears and embarrassment told them I hadn’t.

It told Cadence something entirely different. She told the others to go up to breakfast without us but to ask the camp nurse to come. Our site counselor wasn’t there and would only show when the group got to breakfast. Cadence and I went to the showers after the others left. I took my pajamas and sleeping bag to wash them.

Cadence said, “I figured out how you knew us. I’m sorry we gave you grief, but you should have known better than to speak up and say you knew us.”

I wasn’t ready to admit having been Ronnie. “So how did I know you? And how do you think you figured things out?”

“Don’t play games with me, I’m trying to be your friend,” she said. I knew she was right but I remained silent hoping she would be the one to speak first. “I knew you stayed with the Grants for some reason. When the Hammers grabbed you, word was they knew you and you were somehow related. The fact that Ronnie Hammer had gone missing and though people said they found him; he’s never reappeared anywhere.”

“You went to ninth grade this spring, but you ended up playing junior high softball. Now, do you want to still deny things or confess up and hope we can be friends?”

“I’m sorry, but I hope you won’t tell the others.” I was doing all I can not cry.

“I thought you were probably just pretending to be a girl, but I didn’t think they would allow a boy to be in our hut. When we took showers last night I saw what wasn’t there. Plus you have pretty breasts. The one thing that I don’t understand is how you could be having your period. It is your first period isn’t it and worst you didn’t expect it?”

I confessed to Cadence and told her more than she probably wanted to know. I didn’t realize until I finished that Nurse Crachet was already there. And no her name is not Crachet. That was what the guys named her last year in at our camp skits. Nurse Paula, luckily for me is very good as a nurse and quite compassionate.

“Do I need to examine you, Jan, or do I only need to teach you how to use a tampon and a pad?” Nurse Pauline suggested I needed a good feminine pad if I was still going to ride horses today. She also gave me a pill to help me feel better or as she said, “So you don’t feel quite as lousy as you might without it.

Cadence came out of the shower and dried herself in front of me. I guess that was her way of opening to me, a way of acceptance.

It was later that day I told Cadence there was another boy at Camp who was like I use to be. I was not going to tell her who it was. But she said, “There’s Jeffery whose pretty effeminate or Bobby who's also from Central City and more like you. Do you want me to guess which one you’re talking about?”

“How do you figure things out?”

“My Dad’s, Detective Rawlings but you need to know he didn’t tell me about you.”

I replied, “At least not until after you figured things out.” We both giggled.

I like riding horses enough that it made my day fairly enjoyable. I decided to wait until tomorrow to try and talk to Billy.

Cadence’s friendship helped my being better accepted. As Cadence said I tried too hard to be a friend on my own. The rest of the camp is more fun this year; crafts, the lessons, and singing are more enjoyable. Faith and I visited on Tuesday; she told me, “Someone said you were more agreeable and willing to take part this year.” It had to be Cadence since she was the only one besides Faith to know both sides of me.

Tuesday, I took a towel with me when I went to the lake to swim and canoe. The significance was the towel looked like one that Bobby had, but mine had a girl’s top rolled in it. Needless to say, Bobby was surprised when he picked up the wrong towel and it fell out.

I paused long enough to notice that Bobby liked it. He did a good job at not showing it. I told. “Bobby, did anyone ever tell you there are others like you or that they might be at the camp?”

“I doubt that very much. I don’t know what you think you’re talking about. I am sure that you and I aren’t alike.”

“Did you know Ronnie Hammer was like you?”

“He knew me, but I knew more about him then he knew. But Ronnie told me he wouldn’t say anything to others.” My hand touched Bobby’s hand, “I didn’t.”

Bobby asked, “What do you mean I didn’t, didn’t what?”

I caught my breath, “I didn’t tell anyone as we agreed.” I paused and Bobby stares at me. I knew he is looking to see glimpses of Ronnie. “You can’t see much of Ronnie can you?”

“I have enough clothes here that you could dress and be a girl for part of a day. Around eleven o’clock tomorrow there shouldn’t be anyone at the girls’ shower. You could write a note to give to your counselor that you will miss part of tomorrow for a doctor’s appointment. I could have a note for our counselor that Stephanie will be with our group, possibly even overnight.”

“It wouldn’t work,” Bobby said before he realized he blew his cover.

“I even have a swimsuit that Angie bought for you. It even has enough padding on top to help you to look like the pretty girl you see yourself as.”

“Bobby, my stuff happened by a good accident and by an ugly incident with my folks. …I’m sorry we can’t keep talking like this. I will be at the shower tomorrow if you are willing to try. If you don’t believe who I am you can ask Cadence, her dad is a policeman.” With that, I walked away.

I wasn’t sure if Bobby would show up, but later I figured there was a pretty good chance when Cadence told me, “Bobby asked if I knew who you were? I told him to shush unless he was a friend. He asked me if he could trust you. I told him, it is more like can she trust you. She’s the one who has a secret.”

To be continued…