Chapter 12 Mad Dash

As much as having powers like being invisible would be amazing—especially in the girl’s locker room—it was like all super abilities, imaginary.

When my mind drifted into the invisibility scenario it kept jumping back to last night. Seeing the girls half-naked with the same parts as me, was unsettling. It apparently killed my locker room dreams too. So much so that I had let go of Joy's hand to clear my head.

The doors to the van were already sliding open before I could even move my eyelids. I wondered if they would let me hide in the van. Doubt it. I thought.

“Come on girls,” Heather said.

When I opened my eyes I checked my hand. It was shaking.

Joy was standing at the door waiting for me.

Fuck, fuck fuck! I was stuck with no other option so I got up and joined the others outside.

The parking lot was pretty much full so we really were lucky to get this spot. Several older people passed us and didn’t give me a second glance. Even a couple of kids passing by didn’t look.

Everyone else was chatting about what they were going to eat but I was too nervous for my brain to decode what they were saying.

My legs were moving on their own as I followed Joy.

I stumbled a few times and Heather fell back next to Joy. She was trying to say something to me but I didn’t understand. My brain was too muddled to comprehend her words. After we made it to the door she stopped talking and joined her husband Mark.

Joy was really close to me and kept putting her hands near my elbows when I stumbled. She was probably scared that I was going to pass out. I felt close a few times so I appreciated the help even if I couldn't express it.

When my fears of being beaten up or killed by someone never came to fruition my mind cleared up enough for me to walk properly.

There was a family of four behind us. They were at least in high school. Both were boys and one of them was eyeing me which made me nervous.

As if reading my mind, Joy turned me around and whispered, “Don't worry, they won't do anything.”

Heather turned around and gave me a once-over. No doubt she was making sure I was okay.

“You're dressed like one of the popular kids at school so you're going to get a lot of stares.” Joy whispered.

Everyone suddenly stopped and I almost ran into Gina before I put on the breaks.

There was a line so it looked like we were going to be waiting for a bit.

The place was busy but there were still a good amount of tables available.

A large counter filled with food under heat lamps had its own line. There were thick ceramic plates at the front. Employees lined the other side of the buffet. They would usually help you pick something to eat.

I’d only been to a breakfast buffet a few times in my life. I remembered the food was always good. I especially liked the “desert” options. Mom let me have sweets before my meal one time. I wanted to go back for more but she wouldn't let me. Dad's smile when he told her to let me have one more round was burnt into my brain.

A tear raced down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away before anyone saw it.

I felt more grounded and pushed my feelings back. Normally I would start to panic like I'd done several times at Joy's house but I felt different, stronger somehow.

Joy didn’t push me away when I grabbed her hand. Though I felt better, I needed someone close that cared about me so I appreciated her presence.

When we moved ahead a spot in line I noticed Gina staring at me. She looked away when she saw me looking at her.

What’s that all about? I wondered.

My focus was about normal by the time we hit the service desk. Heather paid for everyone and they directed us toward the food.

Gina was staring at me again when Lacy pinched her shoulder. “What are you going to get?” Lacy asked.

“I don’t know,” Gina said as she rubbed her arm.

Then Lacy noticed I was lucid. “What about you?” she asked me.

Instead of answering, I shrugged.

As Joy’s parents turned around Joy pulled her hand away from mine.

“Are you kids ready for breakfast?” Heather asked.

Everyone nodded but me. It took me a few seconds to catch up and do the same.

Heather's eyes lingered on me for a moment. “Okay, let’s go,” She said and led us to the food.

I ended up in the back which was fine by me. There was much less pressure to choose my food quickly. I could sometimes be a picky eater.

“You gonna be okay?” Joy asked.

My hand went to my chest as I felt my heart. It wasn’t beating fast. “I think so.”

She nodded and turned around.

No one seemed to be paying me any mind and when someone did look at me they smiled. Normally I would get all kinds of looks from people. They were usually unpleasant. The sudden opposite reaction was confusing.

People were staring at Sam though. One man’s eyes were wide and he pointed her out to his partner.

I found myself angry on Sam’s behalf. Why do people have to be such assholes?

Joy elbowed me. “Get a plate.”

In my stupor, I hadn’t noticed that it was my turn. I scooted forward and grabbed a plate.

The vast array of foods was even more intimidating than I remembered. To be honest I wasn’t that hungry. That late-night snack must have helped. Nerves could have been playing into it as well. My indecision grew as I reached the food. Sausage was a must but it was much further ahead in the line so I ended up having to wait for other people.

As I was grabbing a piece a lady asked, “Would you like eggs?”

I nodded. “Scrambled, please.”

“There’s some premade ones down there,” She gestured down the line. “Or we can make some fresh ones for you?” She pointed her thumb behind her.

The ones in the pan looked fine so I opted to take some of those.

Several of the people on the other side of the line kept glancing at me and smiling. I wasn’t sure if they were genuine smiles or “worker” smiles. All the attention I was used to was the opposite so I didn’t have the experience to tell the difference.

Then I came to the bacon. Normal people fawn all over it but I was anything but normal. The smell actually made me gag. I ignored its very presence.

We were near the end when I saw some of my favorite foods. Pancakes, waffles, cereal, and toast. I wanted pancakes but waffles with peanut butter sounded so much better. They would usually bring you peanut butter if you asked. Then again pancakes absorbed syrup like a sponge and the butter made the whole stack so creamy.

“K-Kennedi?” Joy asked. She was finished and waiting for me.

When I turned back to the food she tapped my shoulder.

“Are you coming?” she asked.

I didn't turn around. “Go ahead, I'll be right there.” The aromas had a hold of me and I forgot about my problems.

My imagination ran wild with the food combinations that were laid out before me. My eggs could go on the toast with salt and pepper. The lite eggy bite would only be interrupted by the crunch of the buttery toast.

Then I realized that I was hungrier than I thought I was. The family that was behind us in line was closing in on me and in a panic, I grabbed three pancakes and a couple slices of toast.

When I turned around I scanned the dining room for Joy and the misfits. They were practically on the other side of the restaurant.

I rushed forward and was interrupted as I slammed into something. My feet became tangled up in something and I fell. My food flew forward and I was just able to keep my plate in my hands.

A boy that looked like he was a football player was on the ground next to me. Our legs were entwined. It took me a second to register what had happened.

I dropped my plate into my lap, covered my head, and waited for the inevitable pummeling. I wouldn’t be able to see the hits coming but my head would be protected at least.

Instead of punches, a soft male voice came at me. “Are you okay?”

My hands drifted away from my face so I could get a peek at my assaulter. I wasn't one to look death in the face but today was different.

His brown hair was long and dangled in front of his eyes. For a moment I was lost in them. They were so blue they would make Hawaii's oceans jealous.

“Let me help you up,” Quietus said and reached out a hand.

For some reason, he didn't look angry. I'd ruined his shirt, the TARDIS blue was darkened and blotched. It was probably some sick joke so I scooted away from him.

I was able to get a better look at his body from here. Muscle-bound was a word I would use for him in our D&D games. Along with some other not-so-nice terms.

He put his arms up with his fingers spread wide. “I'm not going to hurt you. It was an accident.”

“I'm sorry,” I pleaded. Tears were building up in the wells of my eyelids.

He shook his head. “No, no it was my fault. I wasn't watching where I was going.”

He'd officially caught me off guard. He reached out again.

When I looked around us there were several families watching. There were too many witnesses here for him to do any real damage so I cautiously gave him a hand and he pulled me up. My plate flopped onto the ground. It was empty already so I wasn’t worried about it getting food anywhere. I’d forgotten all about the clothes I was wearing. Luckily Joy’s purse was still on my shoulder. He’s gonna know I'm a guy! I flinched at the thought.

“You don’t need to be scared, it's okay. Seriously.” He was still holding my hand and I was too afraid to pull away. It didn’t help that his voice was so incredibly calming. I needed to be alert but he was messing with my mind. The warmth he radiated reminded me of my dad’s when we used to arm wrestle.

A crash like this had happened at school once and I could still feel the bruises the kid had given me. Phantom injuries.

My dad would have never let the kids at school mess with me. He probably would have moved us away or put me in a private school. That stupid fucking cat… The dam on the bottom of my eyelids couldn’t handle the water pressure any longer and burst. Tears spread down my cheeks.

“It's okay, really. Let's get you some more food,” he said as he led me over to the front of the line. He let go of my hand, grabbed a plate, and passed it to me.

Two employees walked by us and went to clean up the mess we’d made. I avoided eye contact.

The plate was shaking as I struggled to hold it up. For some reason, it felt much heavier than the one I'd had earlier.

“What food do you like?” he asked.

I glanced up at him and then looked at the food. “S-sausage,” I squeaked out.

“Sausage, sausage,” he said as he searched the buffet.

When he didn't find it fast enough I pointed it out.

He smiled. It was pleasant, not like the devilish grins I'd usually see on people like him.

We walked forward together.

He pointed. “Have you ever had their ham?”

I shook my head.

“You should try it. It's salty and a little sweet.”

Trying new foods wasn't really something I liked to do.

“Oh, c’mon. Here,” he dug through the container and found a really small piece and put it on my plate. “Try it, and if you don't like it, don't eat it. I'm sure you'll like it though.”

I couldn't see Joy or anyone from here. I wondered if they saw me fall.

“What's your name by the way?” he asked.

“W-Kennedi.”

“Waa-Kennedi, that's a new one.”

His grin was contagious and I found myself smiling along with him.

“A smile!” he announced. “She smiles everyone!” A few people looked at us and shook their heads.

When I checked my plate I barely had a second to contemplate the whole gender thing before he moved. If I let him get too far ahead he would probably come back and make another scene. Being the center of attention was not something I liked so I followed him.

“Sausage, for the lady,” he said as he laid down a piece on my plate. “What next?”

Eggs were next so I pointed at them.

“Okay,” he said and grabbed the spoon. “How much do you want?”

He had somehow gotten past my defenses and I felt relaxed enough to make a joke. I pointed at the stain on his shirt. “Bout, that much.”

“Oh,” he said and looked down. “Funny.” He squinted at me as his face got serious.

My heart dropped and a lump instantly formed in my throat.

Suddenly he burst out in laughter. “You really have that doe in the headlights look down, don’t you?”

A breath slowly released from my nose as I squinted. “Don’t do that!”

He put his hands up and the spoon flung out a bit of eggs behind him. He saw what had happened and quickly scooped up a small portion of eggs and put it on my plate.

“Are you going to pick those up?” the nice lady who had pointed the eggs out to me earlier said as he dashed away.

My mouth dropped. I turned to the woman and our eyes made contact. She reached out a hand that had a napkin in it. I didn’t want to be responsible for his mess so I hurried after him even as the woman was shouting at me. I had to weave through people but I was moving so fast I didn’t even get to hear their complaints.

As I caught up to the boy he swung his hand at the food wordlessly asking what I wanted.

I pointed at the pancakes and he grabbed the tongs and put a couple on my plate.

As we hit the very end of the food line he caught my gaze again and I shook my head. We kept going and then he pointed at the drink station.

He grabbed a milk carton and I nodded. He also snagged a couple of napkins.

I was barely able to keep up with him. He made a quick turn and ducked into an empty booth. When I joined him he pulled my shoulder down so that I was ducking.

My breathing was labored and the world was darkening slightly. I did my best to try to control my breathing. The boy tried to talk to me but I had to put a finger up so he would wait a moment.

Being so hyper-focused on my breath made me extremely self-conscious. That’s when I realized the makeup I was wearing was probably ruined from my crying. Shit. Without a mirror, I didn’t know what to do. I reached for a napkin and he gave it to me. I dabbed at my eyelids like I’d learned earlier.

The face he was making made me smile. “What's your name?” I asked.

“Jesse,” he said.

“Like, Jesse from ‘Full House’?” It was an honest question because I never knew anyone with that name before.

He grinned. “Have mercy!” He mimicked Jesse's famous line from the show. He wasn’t as smooth as when John Stamos did it but he was close.

The show was one of my favorites and it went off the air last year. The last scene where Jesse plays the guitar was heartbreaking. When we found out that they weren’t going to make any more we rewatched the finale again. It was the first time I cried around my mom since my dad died.

Jesse took a deep breath. “So, are you here with anyone?”

“Yeah, they're—,” I pointed at Joy and them. “Over there.”

He didn’t even look. His eyes stayed locked on me. “Hey, give me a sec.”

He scooted out of his side of the booth and ran over to an empty table that hadn’t been cleaned yet and grabbed a glass of water. When he got back he dabbed a napkin in the water and said, “Come here.”

I leaned over unsure of what he was going to do. I was surprised when he proceeded to wipe my cheeks off.

He tossed the napkin behind him. “That’s better.”

This was all so confusing. Why is he being so nice?

“So, where are you from?” he asked.

Telling him the truth was the last thing I wanted. Him hunting me down and killing me was also something I was scared of. So, I tried to think of the farthest place I could. “Victorville.” That was probably two hours from here.

“A high desert girl.”

Him calling me girl was getting me pissed off. “I really hav—”

“What grade are you?” he asked.

I didn’t see any issues with telling him that. “Sophomore.”

A smile spread across his face. It confused me.

My breathing was better now so I stood up. “I should get to my friends.”

“Where were they again?” He asked.

When I pointed them out again he looked. When he turned to me his eyebrows rose. He probably saw Sam. “Cool, I'll walk you over.”

Before I could protest he was already out of the booth and heading in their direction.

I chased after him, keeping my plate close to me. He’s so fast! Crashing again scared me so I made sure no one else was ahead of me.

Joy had her hands on the table and was scanning the room. Then her eyes landed on me. She waved.

I raised my plate of food and smiled.

Her eyes moved from me to Jesse then back to me.

My shoulders went up and I mouthed ‘Later’.

When we got closer Joy's eyes went wide. Her parents' eyebrows shot up as they saw me.

“I have delivered to you one, Kennedi,” Jesse said as we arrived. “Five hundred and fifty-three dollars is my service fee.”
Joy grabbed her bag and dashed over to me. She took my plate, set it down, and led me away in some unknown direction.

Jesse stood there mute as we walked away.

***
I stopped as Joy tried to drag me into the girl’s restroom.

When she caught me looking at the boy's door, she just pulled harder and I went with her. It was that or lose the arm and I was pretty sure I couldn't grow another one.

We went directly to the sink and she hugged me. “I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone!”

My demeanor was statuesque as a woman walked out of a stall and stared at us.

Joy noticed my nonreactiveness and turned.

“I fell,” I said.

The woman nodded, washed her hands, and left.

Joy had this confused look on her face. “Tell me what happened?”

A mom and her three maybe four-year-old kid walked into the bathroom.

I turned around to see what I looked like. Smudged black streaks were where Jesse had wiped them.

“Let me help?” Joy asked.

It was so weird seeing the girl in the mirror looking back at me. I nodded and Joy got to work on my face.

A girl our age came in, glanced at me, and went right into an empty stall.

Joy ignored everyone but me. Her concentration was hardcore. I hated the stench from the makeup-removing towels. It didn't look like she was putting as much makeup on me as Sam did.

“So what happened?” Joy repeated herself.

I sighed. “After I got my food the first time—”

“There was a second time?” she asked.

“Yeah, when I was on my way to you I ran into Jesse and fell.”

Joy stopped applying makeup and stared. “Same guy who was walking with you?”

“Mmm-hmm,” I hummed as she went near my mouth with a powder of some sort.

She was quiet while she worked on one of my eyes.

Several women came and went and my heart skipped every time. I'll never get used to this. I thought.

Joy had to keep pulling my face in her direction because I kept checking the mirror. My mind was having problems seeing the girl in the mirror as me. Disassociation set in and goosebumps cascaded down my arms.

I kept expecting to feel something bad or wrong about my appearance but I felt nothing. Perhaps my mind was trying to process it all. The clothes were pretty great though, I knew that much. It was weird being so interested in girls' clothes. I never had a reaction or desire for them when I was a kid.

Joy asked me a question but I didn't hear what she said.

“What?” I asked.

She put away the lipstick she had just used. “I said, did he at least help you up?”

“Jesse?” I asked.

I got a quick nod from her.

For some reason, my mind focused on the warmth of his hand and how easily he pulled me up. Then an image of him sitting across from me, his blue eyes peeking through his brown hair flashed in my vision. My heart fluttered and a warmth spread through my body. A shallow breath escaped my lips.

Joy squinted at me. “What did he do?”

“H-he helped me up.” My body was reacting in a really weird way that I didn't understand. I was too scared to say anything about it and wasn't going to tell her that I had cried either. Crying was a weakness and I hated it. In fact, I wondered why Jesse didn't mess with me when I started crying. Last time I did it in front of my friends they wouldn't shut up about it for weeks.

Joy gave me a funny look. I wasn't sure what it meant. She got really close to me and whispered, “What aren't you telling me, Walker?”

“He helped me get food and…”

“What?”

The mad dash we'd made through the buffet after he tossed the eggs made me smile.

Joy slapped my shoulder. “What!”

“You'd have to be there to get it.”

“Tell me.”

My shoulders lifted slightly. “He threw some eggs and we had to run away from the egg lady.” It'd been a while since I ran away from grown-ups. On the weekends when I was still in elementary school I used to hang out at my high school. Vic and I would ride bikes there. Sometimes a security guard would chase us and my little adventure with Jesse reminded me of it.

“That's it?” she said. Her voice sounded like she was accusing me of something. I'd heard that tone from my sister's plenty of times.

I shook my head. “He just walked me back, that's it.”

We weren't exactly whispering and people started watching.

Joy looked behind her and saw the people I kept glancing at. She clenched her fists and started shaking.

Oh shit.

I really didn’t want her mad at me so I decided to confide in her. When I put my hand on her shoulder her whole body snapped around and it made her skirt flare.

“W-when I fell…” I leaned in close. “I started crying because I thought he knew about, you know…” I gestured at myself.

Joy took a step back and her eyes flicked back and forth as she scanned my face.

I looked down in embarrassment. A part of me was still waiting for Joy to make fun of me for expressing my emotions.

After what seemed like ages her face softened and she closed her eyes. “Do you like him?”

“What!” I leaned in close and whispered. “I'm not gay!”

She pushed me away and covered her mouth. Her eyes became puffy, and her face got really red.

It took me a little too long to understand why she was reacting that way. Then it hit me that she was likely struggling with the gay thing. “Sorry,” I said.

Eye contact between us went on for at least a full minute before she turned around.

When I glanced at a woman who was watching us she looked away. She turned to the mirror and acted like she was checking her makeup.

I wasn't sure what to do so I mimicked what the woman did. My makeup looked pretty much the same as when we left the house. When I looked closer I noticed the bottom of my eyes didn't have the black gunk on them. I wasn't sure what it was called to be honest.
Joy turned around and watched me examine my face.

“Under here?” I asked as I faced her.

She nodded and then sighed. It took her a few seconds but she started on my face again.

I had to be still for her but I was nervous so she had to tell me to stop moving more than once.

The thoughts of Jesse made me feel good and I was struggling to justify why. It was embarrassing. None of my friends make me feel like this. Joy had made me feel similar while we were kissing earlier which was confusing me even more.

When the nosey woman left, Joy gave me another hug. I didn’t waste the opportunity and hugged her back. My mind was a mess and I almost started crying again.

Somehow Joy knew because she pulled back. “No crying, I'm almost done.” Her voice was soothing. She continued where she left off. She finished pretty quickly.

I took in a shaky breath as Joy stepped back from me. She examined my face one last time and then my clothes. When she seemed satisfied she said, “Let's go.” Several makeup containers had migrated to the counter so I helped Joy put them away.

As we were walking, the teen girl came out of her stall. Her eyes lingered on me the whole walk to the door. I couldn’t help but wonder why she was staring.

***