Welcome, my sisters, into the world of the New Age. Listen to the formless music in the background. Hear the muted chanting of a choir of True Believers. Abandon your previous self to the teachings of Mother Earth. Feel the innate power of the mysterious Female Life Force flow into your sadly male body. Read the articles in crossdressing magazines filled with terms like "oneness", "karma", "pansexuality" and even "reincarnation." Recently I even learned that women have superior hearing to enable them to be better mothers.

Now I'd be the last one to publicly trample on anyone else's spiritual beliefs, no matter how ridiculous I privately consider them, but I firmly believe all people have the inalienable right to go to hell in their own way without help from anyone else. You can believe seventeen contradictory things at once and it's fine with me, just do not expect me to share your belief. The skeptic in me starts to scream things like "Oh, yeah? Cite me a study proving women have better hearing than men!" I have a hard time believing my desire to wear frilly things can be traced to experiences in a past life, especially when I am not convinced I have any life besides the one I am living now.

"New Age" anything gives me problems. The essence of the New Age seems to be uncritical acceptance of the mystic powers of the earth, the universe, little green men from outer space or some other source of power of which normal mortals have no understanding or control. Self proclaimed leaders will offer you understanding and guidance (for a price, and not always in money) using crystals, pyramids and other conduits to control those forces. New Age ideas can cure your ills, soothe your soul, soup up your mind and balance your tires. The beauty of it all is you do not have to understand anything about it; you have no responsibility, it is all beyond your control. Isn't it nice to know your need to crossdress is a force of nature?

Sow-wash! (That is the feminine of Hogwash, isn't it?) You better take responsibility for your crossdressing. It's one thing to indulge in the fantasy of femininity, but this is one more variation on the "I can't help it" excuse. Yes, spirituality is a mainstay of human existence, be it in a Born Again Christian, an Eastern Mystic or a disciple of the New Age. Humanity seems to have an inextinguishable need for something (God, The Cosmic All, The Great Frisbee) that is responsible for creation, something bigger than us that started it all.

But fer cryin' out loud there are no mysterious powers or abilities endowed to a person by virtue of femininity or masculinity. Watch out, sisters. Just because it's in print somewhere doesn't make it true. Which leads to a nice piece of circular logic to end this tirade. Go ahead and read all those TV rags you subscribe to, but don't accept the pontifications of anyone, including me, without questioning.