Kingston Academy Shorts

#1: The Laundry Incident

By Melanie E.

For Julian Stone, signing up to be a Princess has been a stone gas. But when a simple prank goes horribly wrong, is this Princess man enough to own up?

-==-

It was cruel.

It was diabolical.

It was... absolutely... perfect.

"Muahahahaha," I chuckled, in my best Evil Mastermind laugh. I had spent years practicing it, and it was getting pretty good, if I do say so myself.

If anything deserved an Evil Mastermind laugh, it was this. I opened the bag and peeked at what was inside, then gave Robert a raised eyebrow. "Kinky."

"Hey, it's what you asked for. If anyone asks, though--"

"You were never here, we never spoke, and no money exchanged hands," I said, rolling my eyes. It wasn't the first time I'd used Robert as the middle man to get materials for one of my pranks, and I was used to his paranoia.

He sneered down at the bag he'd handed me, not entirely able to hide the blush that was creeping into his cheeks. "Wouldn't that have been easier for you to pick up anyway?"

"Who, me?" I asked in false innocense, putting a hand on my breastbone. "Not really," I followed in a more normal tone. "People get suspicious when I pick up anything out of the ordinary."

Robert snorted at that, but as he turned around and walked away I just barely heard him say "I can't imagine why!"

I idly considered what kind of prank I could play on him in the future, but for only a moment. After all, I had far more entertaining Evil to perpetrate.

-==-

"You sure about this Jules?"

"Yes I'm sure! Or do you not want the fifty bucks?"

"No! I want it! It's just...."

"Just what?"

"Why?"

Grrrr. Why do people have to question my plans anyway, when blind obedience is so much easier? "Because," I said into my phone, "she's the newbie, and the newbie gets pranked. Plus I'm not sure what's going on between her and my brother, and it's kinda creeping me out."

"So you're gonna--"

"YES. Now, are you in or not?"

"...Fine."

"Good," I confirmed before hanging up. This was turning into a singularly expensive prank, but I was certain the outcome would be wonderfully and hilariously gratifying. Using middle-men would keep things from getting linked back to me easily, and if everything went well the looks on Becky's face for weeks to come would be priceless.

-==-

The call had finally come in letting me know it was time to act, and I was more than ready. Just one phone call to make, and everything would be set. I took a deep breath before dialing the number for the laundry room, spending the time between rings wondering impatiently why Beck didn't have a cell phone.

"Hello?"

"Becky?" I asked, fighting back a snerk at the frustrated sigh from the other end. "Hey, this is Jules. Can you come up to my room for a moment?"

"I'm kinda in the middle of laundry. Can it wait?"

"It won't take a moment. Please?"

"I, ah... alright. Be right up."

"Great, thanks."

As soon as the line went dead I switched over to my texting screen and sent the message. Any time now....

*knockknockknock*

I opened the door to find an annoyed-looking Beck glaring at me, arms crossed and hip cocked. How does this kid think she even vaguely looks like a guy? I mean, even in scruffy jeans and a baggy tee I couldn't see anything but a Becky in front of me.

"You wanted me?"

"YES! Come in for a sec. You're in Johnson's first period American Lit class, right?" I didn't wait for an answer before continuing. "I have it third period, and I was wondering if you could help me out a bit?"

On the one hand, it was a valid distraction. On the other, American Lit was not and never would be my strongest subject, so why not kill two birds with one stone?

"Alright, I guess. What's the problem?"

"Well, we're reading 'To Kill a Mockingbird,' and it's just...."

With that, the conversation was off. I was surprised at how good Beck actually was, she'd obviously spent a lot of time reading and had a great comprehension of the book -- way better than mine at least. Beck was thoroughly distracted from even thinking about her laundry, and for the briefest of moments I felt a twinge of regret over what I was planning to put her through. Maybe I shouldn't have gone so far to prank her after all?

The more we worked the more guilty I felt, until finally I couldn't handle it any more. "Beck?"

"Yeah?"

"I need to--"

*BZZZZBZZZZBZZZZ*

"I think you have a text."

"Damnit!" I said, picking up my phone. As soon as I saw the message on my screen, though, my anger vanished, and I froze.

"What's wrong?"

Then the fire alarm went off.

-==-

"Mister Stone."

"Yes, Mister Uchiha."

"Ummhmm." The headmaster was sat behind his desk with his fingers steepled, glaring at me. I'd had to put up with this on a few occasions before, but he'd never looked this pissed before. Plus, this was the first time I wasn't sure the cause had been worth it.

"Two dryers, one washer, repairs to both the wall and floor as well as electrical, plus several students' clothes. This is, I believe, your most expensive 'prank' yet."

"Yessir," I said, bowing my head and staring at the floor.

"And all of that due to this," he said, dropping what little remained of the plastic bag that had held a variety of crotchless lace panties and g strings before it has been unceremoniously dropped behind one of the dryers in the laundry room when my planter freaked over someone walking in right before he replaced Beck's underwear with its contents.

A dryer that had, apparently, had a minor short in a wire that was aggravated when the bag bumped it.

Then caught fire.

"Yessir?"

"And you admit to this all being your idea?"

"It wasn't meant to--"

"I SHOULD HOPE NOT," Mr. Uchiha said in a forceful voice, not quite a yell, but right on the edge of being one. "Mr. Stone...."

"I'll pay for everything, sir. Really," I added, when he gave me another glare. "Just please don't kick me out."

"Kick you out?" He asked, and for the first time since I had stepped into his office the anger on his face gave way to a look of confusion. "Mr. Stone, if I wanted to remove you from the school you would already be gone."

"But with all the damage I thought--"

"Your education is worth more than the damage, Mr. Stone, and I've seen your work enough times to know that this is nothing like what you'd planned. If I'd thought for a moment you or one of your conspirators would have done this on purpose, we wouldn't be having this conversation at all."

I felt myself start to collapse in relief.

"That said," he continued, freezing me again. "You are being held responsible, Mr. Stone, and this WILL go on your record. I'll accept your payment for all damages. On top of that, your visitation privileges for town have been revoked for this semester, and you're lucky I'm not removing you from the Princess program. This is NOT the conduct we expect of you."

"Yessir."

"And one more thing."

"Sir?"

"Let's keep the source of this disruption quiet, shall we? I don't think it would do you any good if this got out, not even to Mister Henderson. He's lucky enough only one of the loads to be destroyed was his."

"No sir," I agreed. When Beck had found out that some of the clothes that had been destroyed had included his one pair of uniform pants, he'd been ready to murder someone.

"Good. Now go to your room; you're confined there until tomorrow morning."

I didn't have an escort back to my room, but I didn't need one. I'd never had a prank go this badly wrong before, and it was oddly worse that I was banned from letting Beck know what happened. There had to be something I could do to help, at least a little bit.

I might have been banned from leaving my room, but I still had my phone. I'd left it in my room for the talk with Mr. Uchiha, but as soon as I got back I had a phone call to make.

"Hey, Robert. No, not another prank, I promise. Can you get hold of a pair of uniform pants for me?"

-==-
End
-==-

NOTES: Welp, here it is, the first Kingston Academy Shorts piece I've worked out. If it isn't entirely obvious, I've gotten a little out of practice again, so I'm not really proud of this one, but it's been running through my head for a little while, and I thought some people might find it a fun little addition to the PFH universe. Enjoy!